Inevitable Defeat - Slovakia '44

[nuclearslurpee]

The post-war memoirs from the Operation Overlord commanders will be hilarious as they try to explain how they achieved so little and spent so long bogged down in France. While those who replaced them in Italy will modestly explain how they smashed through North Italy, the Alps and reached Berlin before the Overlord forces had even taken all of France.

Little-read memoirs by Slovakian generals claiming that their heroic defense of Paris was the primary driver of Allied ineptitude will go largely unnoticed.

So my best guess is past-Pip, back in 2011 when he was fixing the D-Day invasions bugs, may have noticed that, got a bit annoyed and then... helped... the Royal Navy along a bit when he was editing the save file. And then made no note of those changes and obscured his memory of ever doing so with whisky.

As this is the most probable explanation, both mathematically and when accounting for the personalities involved, I wholeheartedly buy this one. glug glug

Raises a point of curiosity I've always had, though: y'all overseas have your Scottish whisky (scotch) and your Irish whisky, but is there a properly English whisky in the mix as well, or do you lot just import your spirits in the name of post-colonialism?

 

[El Pip]

Little-read memoirs by Slovakian generals claiming that their heroic defense of Paris was the primary driver of Allied ineptitude will go largely unnoticed.

They will be discovered by revisionist historians looking to sell books by challenging the accepted narrative.

As this is the most probable explanation, both mathematically and when accounting for the personalities involved, I wholeheartedly buy this one. glug glug

Raises a point of curiosity I've always had, though: y'all overseas have your Scottish whisky (scotch) and your Irish whisky, but is there a properly English whisky in the mix as well, or do you lot just import your spirits in the name of post-colonialism?

There's proper whisky from almost everywhere. Even the Welsh are allowed to make it and it's surprisingly palatable, but I'm not sure I'd recommend Penderyn Distillery at anything other than a bargain price. There's even some very recent French single malts out there which call to me in a sacrilegious sort of way.

English distilleries are a fairly recent thing, in whisky terms, the first one has just got some 10yrs out which I think are coming along nicely. We shall see how they develop as time goes on, they will probably be deeply matured and refined drinks by the time Butterfly gets to... well not the end obviously... 1938?

 

[TheButterflyComposer]

English distilleries are a fairly recent thing, in whisky terms, the first one has just got some 10yrs out which I think are coming along nicely. We shall see how they develop as time goes on, they will probably be deeply matured and refined drinks by the time Butterfly gets to... well not the end obviously... 1938?

Scotch and irish whiskey are still better, but then again the English never had a tradition making it. It doesn't help that the english have a history of making most of their good alcohol somewhere else (Portugal and Bordeaux mostly) except beer and cider. Kent is into wine though, and mead is still a thing in many super old monasteries (then again they were all set up by the irish so maybe dont count)?

 

[racebear75]

The end was near, than reached, than vanished and now it's near again since I had the spare time to look here. So many changes in such a short time (for this AAR).

 

[El Pip]

Scotch still better

Yes.

and irish whiskey are still better

No. Not even close. Irish Whiskey (misspelled so the observant can avoid the horror) is terrible. The pot still was invented as a tax dodge, not because anyone thought it would produce a better drink. You can still taste the misanthropic penny pinching misery in every glass, which is why it taste so awful.

. It doesn't help that the english have a history of making most of their good alcohol somewhere else (Portugal and Bordeaux mostly)

Ricardian Comparative Advantage. The secret weapon of Empire.

The end was near, than reached, than vanished and now it's near again since I had the spare time to look here. So many changes in such a short time (for this AAR).

All things are relative, but we are (relatively speaking) careening towards the denouement with unseemly haste. I don't wish to alarm anyone, but the last update was at almost real-time...

 

[Bullfilter]

the last update was at almost real-time...

Matron! Bring the smelling salts. And a Scotch. Neat. Two fingers, please!

 

[nuclearslurpee]

Two fingers, please!

I like your optimism, but I fear this may be too little.

 

[Bullfilter]

I like your optimism, but I fear this may be too little.

It's the W.C. Fields two fingers of whiskey - the top one extended up the glass as the barman pours it!

 

[Surt]

It's the W.C. Fields two fingers of whiskey - the top one extended up the glass as the barman pours it!

You need a certain ... maturity to know this stuff!

 

[nuclearslurpee]

You need a certain ... maturity to know this stuff!

Or immaturity...as in "I'm mature! hic Another one!"

 

[El Pip]

Matron! Bring the smelling salts. And a Scotch. Neat. Two fingers, please!

I like your optimism, but I fear this may be too little.

It's the W.C. Fields two fingers of whiskey - the top one extended up the glass as the barman pours it!

You need a certain ... maturity to know this stuff!

Or immaturity...as in "I'm mature! hic Another one!"

Excellent work all round gentlemen.

And on that slightly alcoholic note, let us return to Bratislava!

 

[El Pip]

2nd April 1945.

While Tiso was wasting his time on a weekly cabinet meeting discussing the rash of French and Cuban Spies who were, somehow, plaguing the Slovak Government in Exile, a far more important meeting had been arranged in the Führer Bunker. German Generals Jodl and Keitel are bringing the latest news to their leader.

"How do you think the Führer will take the news?" Keitel asked.

"It is a mix of good news and bad news, so it might go well." Jodl speculated.

"We have good news?" Keitel raised his eyebrow.

"You remember those bitter arguments about which division got priority for the last of the panzers and armoured vehicles?" Jodl said.

Keitel nodded sadly.

"Well, that is no longer a problem." Jodl continued.

Keitel was far too experienced to react positively to this.

"I know we sent the last of the Panthers and Hertzers to the Totenkopf, but the Führer can always order them back." He said.

"Not any more." Jodl handed over the file.

The 3rd SS Totenkopf Panzer Division had bravely attacked the advancing Allies in the face of overwhelming odds and under hostile skies. They had, of course, been massacred, taking with them the last Panther tanks and Hertzer tank destroyers in Germany. As the Luftwaffe were grounded, the Kriegsmarine sunk and the Tigers, Stugs and Jagdpanzers long since destroyed, this did at least solve Germany's fuel crisis.​

"That's not actually good news." Keitel pointed out.

Jodl nodded sadly as they entered the lower levels of the bunker.

"At least the lighting is more effective these days, strong and bright so we can see what we are doing. I approve of this new approach." Keitel said.

"Apparently it was installed by the finest British experts." Jodl said.

Keitel looked around quizzically.

"I am surprised POWs could do this level of work." He said.

"It is almost like natural light." Jodl agreed.

Keitel looked up.

"That's because it is natural light." He pointed. "Coming in through the bomb holes the RAF has made in the bunker."

"I think the briefing can wait." Jodl suggested.

This final discussion on National Socialist lighting policy was interrupted as the two men ran screaming from the building to grab some loot, a false passport and any form of transport out of Berlin.


Shortly later, in Führer Bunker Broom Cupboard #7A (known to it's occupants as the Slovak Government in Exile's cabinet meeting room), a messenger dramatically enters. The cabinet interrupted their epistemological argument about whether the Hungarian government in exile even could leak in a meaningful way, given no-one cared about them, and look up at the ruins of the door.

"The Führer has an announcement about the future conduct of the war." The messenger announced.

Please insert your own enraged, demented screaming from the lower levels of the Führer Bunker ​

--
Notes:
We are now perilously close to the end, we have even seen the final iteration of National Socialist Lighting Policy. Things don't get much more final than that.

 

[Wraith11B]

Did we truly return to Bratislava? Or is that the new Wehrmacht plan to try and have the British run amok trying to actually reach Berlin?

 

[Bullfilter]

the two men ran screaming from the building to grab some loot, a false passport and any form of transport out of Berlin.

From the beginning of the chapter I definitely had Downfall images (which I rewatched a week back, basically for the Hitler rant, to assist with the vibe of a failing Germany for AAR writing purposes). Keitel and Jodl wisely short-circuited that and went straight to the escape plan. Hopefully the Allies will capture them and their next report will be to the trial judges in Nuremberg. The Slovak advisers should take note.

 

[TheButterflyComposer]

It's not my favourite German language war period film, but only because the one about the Confrence in Nuremburg (you know...that one) was so good.

 

[El Pip]

I've added a cover image for the thread, montage of some of my favourite images from the story so far. Paradox have a weird scaling thing going on so what you see probably differs from me, hopefully it still works.

Did we truly return to Bratislava? Or is that the new Wehrmacht plan to try and have the British run amok trying to actually reach Berlin?

We were physically in Berlin, but T&T have brought the incompetence, hopelessness and bad poerty of their government style with them, so it now feels a lot like Bratislava. That is my excuse and I will be sticking with it.

From the beginning of the chapter I definitely had Downfall images (which I rewatched a week back, basically for the Hitler rant, to assist with the vibe of a failing Germany for AAR writing purposes). Keitel and Jodl wisely short-circuited that and went straight to the escape plan. Hopefully the Allies will capture them and their next report will be to the trial judges in Nuremberg. The Slovak advisers should take note.

I wanted to hint at a Downfall vibe, because how could I not, but not have a full rant scene because I couldn't do it justice. Glad that came across.

It's not my favourite German language war period film, but only because the one about the Confrence in Nuremburg (you know...that one) was so good.

Did you mean a certain Conference in Wannsee? Or is this something I've entirely missed (very possible).

 

[TheButterflyComposer]

Did you mean a certain Conference in Wannsee? Or is this something I've entirely missed (very possible).

That ones good too. I think actually that film pretty much begins where the Germans film leaves off. Conspiracy (the English one) might be more chilling though, given that the higher ups have already made their decision before the start of the film and are just telling everyone to follow their orders about it and figuring out how exactly to go about the business.

 

[roverS3]

So, German Generals are running, but the Slovak Government is bravely staying put, in Berlin. (after running from Brats in Lava). No one will ever be able to say they flaked on the war.

 

[Surt]

Tiso will be the last man standing ... or laying under the table ... in Berlin soon

 

[H.Appleby]

I do really want to see your AAR, but a massive rewrite project seems a high price to pay. Would you be prepared to negotiate?

I am always prepared to negotiate and capture gains from trade.

the entire decade of the 2000s was pretty improbable so yes. Especially with supposed chemical weapons often coming up.

To say nothing of the 2010s.




The one problem with my AAR is that I want to find a way to portray many of the America Firsters sympathetically, especially Burton K. Wheeler, who was viciously slandered as a Nazi in The Plot Against America.* Roth portrays him as trying to make himself Fuhrer of the United States despite Wheeler having historically opposed the war because he anticipated that FDR would seize dictatorial powers and crack down on civil liberties (as Wilson had during WWI and as FDR indeed did during WWII). The problem is that it's hard to write an AAR for a World War II game that makes the people that wanted to keep America out of the war look reasonable and not like an annoyance (or worse, Nazi sympathizers).**

*Which is a garbage book that I regret reading.
**Of course some America Firsters were Nazi sympathizers, Henry Ford and Lindbergh weren't Nazis per-se, but they were certainly the part of the American body politic most closely aligned to a lot of Nazi ideology.



This update has made the forum both butt-ugly and wholly non-functional. Truly the Swedes excel themselves.