CHAPTER XVII: PALATINATE
Part 4: Triering Too Hard
(1690-1695)
Getting a Headaache
It is January 1690. Our army's rebuilt, and it's time to go smash something with it. Mainz just conquered Oldenburg to my north, so it's important that the Palatinate grow large enough to stay competitive. Our targets are Aachen and Lorraine. Both have minor allies like France and Armagnac who shouldn't pose a challenge whatsoever.
We need to wait for the Lorraine truce to end, so let's finish off Aachen first. True, they have some allies, but then again so do we.
(PALATINATE, Bavaria, Milan, Savoy, Siena, Trier vs. DENMARK, Aachen, Saxony)
Denmark could be nasty, but Denmark can't get to us. Well, unless they get military access. Or they're already at war with some of our neighbors, which they are: (DENMARK, Aachen, Saxony vs. THURINGIA, Ulm, Wurzburg, Mainz). Oops.
No matter. The Aachen army moves to siege Berg, while Darth moves into Koln with 25K men. Once reinforced, he attacks and destroys the Aachen army in two successive battles.
That's when we notice the Danes have massed 36K in Brunswick and are on the way to talk. By now we have sieging armies in both Koln and Aachen, and I keep moving Darth's army to intercept the Danish advance. They finally get bored and leave, heading eastward.
We celebrate by killing 2K new Aachen troops - artillery.
In April we realize the Savoyards are honoring their alliance by invading Netherlands. Wait - how did they get involved? Well, they are bringing in their colonial states as well. Fortunately the Savoyard army, some 38K, is more than equal to the task of keeping the Dutch busy. It effectively deprives me of a powerful ally, but at least it won't open up any new fronts.
What will do precisely that is Wurtemberg declaring war on Milan.
Logically I probably should have ignored them: Denmark and Netherlands together are enough trouble, however Milan
is trying to help me in my northern wars (and has at least 15K tied up in Netherlands), so...let's do it. We'll take you all on!
The Danish army returned in May and tried to sneak into Aachen, but once again we blocked their advance and they left. One month later the British start sending us a generous 7.85d per month, which we use to fund 12K mercs to help subdue Koln.
For several months there's little to report: Savoy and Milan continue working their way through the Netherlands, who can at best slow them down. We siege Koln and Aachen. Something is attracting everyone's armies in the east - I don't know or care what. In December 1690 a wandering minstrel starts playing for the courts. Some think we should keep him around, but I let him wander the country at will. (+1 Stab, now at 3) Later that month the Savoyard deathstack caught the Dutch and won, but just barely and they would live to see another day.
Koln fell to my new commander, Boba Fett (F2 S5 M3 Sg2) in February. He immediately rushed to Heidelberg where a Liege army finally showed interest in us and started a siege. There were no rancors involved, so of course he won.
A rather large Wurzburg army settled in Pfalz, then detached about half to retake Koln. I let Darth explain things to them.
Solid victories, but by June 1691 we're starting to bleed out, and with the second Wurzburg and an equally large Tuscan army in Mainz I don't dare risk buying more mercs: Needless to say our manpower is tapped. I check, and Denmark will accept a 'concede defeat'...but we have 13% warscore, and the Netherlands are definitely suffering. Perhaps we can hold out if we merge our armies.
Through the summer the combined Tuscan/Wurtemberg/Liege army, now some 37K, settle in Elsass, Wurtemberg to rest up. In October they make their move, advancing through Luxembourg (Liege) towards the siege at Aachen.
We try to run west and destroy a small Liege force, but in November they catch us. It's 42K on 13K, and even Darth isn't that good. Our army is annihilated.
Well then.
In December 1691 we surrender to Denmark, and like any good emperor we're not the ones who have to pay for it.
Savoy was 87% of the way towards diploannexing Siena, and they've held Trier since my tenure. Boo hoo.
Initially I have some hopes of holding out against Wurtemberg, and go about hiring 5K merc infantry including the new Caroline type that we're not yet eligible to make on our own. Over the winter of 1691-92 hope fades however: The large Savoy and Milan armies in Netherlands are black flagged and have to go home. Wurtemberg has less distance to travel, and their 41K army smashes 31K Bavarians in Liege. In February 1692, we beg off.
The peace is reasonably generous: Yes, we lose Bavaria and Milan, but we can make up for that. The 117d forces us to take out a loan, which we will also be able to absorb. What it does do is give us a chance to rebuild our army. I expect the rest of this turn to be nice and quiet.
Into the Sienaset
I
really want Spain or the Netherlands as an ally. Whoever my 'great power' friend is, he's not very helpful. I don't expect it's Savoy, so probably Poland or Hungary. Poland's alliance broke in the last war, so now we break ours with Hungary then turn around and guarantee Spain. This amuses them enough to agree to an alliance in April 1692.
They're just there to guarantee no one stomps on me while I rebuild though. Then, in September, we need to put our emperor pants back on.
Some days it just doesn't pay to force choke people.
Agreeing to help gives us +5 Imperial authority. It also gives us leadership and we invite Spain and Savoy to the fun. Both agree.
Correction: Both would have agreed, but apparently Savoy answered first - and when they did, they took over leadership of the war cancelling my Call to Arms. Which would be okay, but it turns out the Savoyards are just a little annoyed about losing their vassals.
In October we invade Switzerland to drive them from the war and perhaps even pick something up for ourselves. Since Savoy wants to be leader so badly, we'll let them deal with the Swiss army - which they do with disappointing rapidity.
Sundgau falls in February 1693, and before we can think of imposing terms Savoy makes peace gaining 242 ducats in the bargain.
Thanks fellas.
There's zero point in invading Italy to deal with Mitrehead. yes, they have 9K in Siena, but Mainz is apparently involved and has 15K in Rome and another 5K in Romagna. Our army, now up to 10K (8/0/2 artillery), goes home. In July Savoy forces them to surrender and give Dalmatia to Venice.
In other news, Franche-Comte finally converts to Rheinlander from Burgundian, leaving Metz the only holdout. Shawnee shocks Europe by defeating Brittany in a straight up match taking 88 ducats in the resulting peace.
Triering Times
It's now September 1693, and I notice little Trier. Trier no longer has Savoy protecting it. In fact, their only ally is Burgundy - who is at war with Great Britain, their Argentine colony, and Armagnac. I'll take the 2 war exhaustion (and pay it off) - I should have just enough time to do this before the end of the turn, and the Trier army's just moved off to help their ally....
Yeah, I could have used the 'Revoke Electorate' CB, but that would just anger the other electors, and I still have an outside chance of keeping the crown.
Later in September Darth sieges Trier. They reply by moving their 6K army back to siege Metz. Trier's a heavily fortified city, so Darth ends up leaving half his army behind as he engages the Trier..ans... at even odds. We lose 2400, they lose 3200 and retreat to Lothringen.
In December Wurtemberg finally defeats Milan, and the price is high. Milan gives up their province to Wurtemberg - expected. Hungary gives up one to Poland. Milan gives Parma back to Mitrehead, giving me a CB as Emperor. Perhaps if we get another turn...
Not much happens afterwards until June when diplomats succeed in convincing the Netherlands that we're not that bad.
This raises our relations to +6 (WITH maxed out improved relations), and now they WOULD ally with us if we were the last country in the world.
Maybe. They'd think about it at least.
July sees the Trieran army return to Metz. Darth marches south again, once more at even odds, but this time fate favors the defenders and he falls back with 2600 losses versus 1K.
We later learn it's because of our outmoded weapons and tactics, so we invest in Military-22 (Light Cav) and trade up to Line Infantry (16/16 vs. 16/12 Gustavan), and Coehorn Mortars (12/12 vs. 9/9 Swivel Cannons).
Trier falls in November, and we of course annex it.
Burgundy won't consider peace yet, but considering who they're up against I consider that a non-factor.
It also means we have an open elector seat - but no one to give it to. As it currently stands the vote would be Palatinate 2/Saxony 2/Savoy 1/Bohemia 1. The Imperial countries who actually somewhat like me include Saxony and Bohemia, who already have votes. Savoy loves us (+200 relations), but considering they already have one vote I imagine they'd vote for themselves. I think we'll just sit on it for now.
Lastly, a petition for redress turns ugly in December leading to an 8K peasant rebellion. Darth's on scene in days and smashes them on January 5, 1695. Thus ends our turn.
Johan's Dice
Reign: 20 years
Needed: 5+
Roll: 3
Continue? No
And our stay.