Alright, it's time to get back in the saddle. Losing with the Teutonic Order hurt, but it wasn't a true reflection of my skill. At least that's what I told myself when I loaded up the CK II 1337 scenario as England, ignored the Hundred Years War and instead stomped on Ireland. I felt better.
So, this AAR won't be like most of what you see. Its closest ancestor is possibly Three Countries, One Goal by Storey back in EU2. At least it's the one I thought of while preparing this. Hence, I'll borrow freely from his intro:
This will be a RANDOM AAR - meaning I will let the RNG determine my starting country. I will then play for a number of years determined by the chart below. When done, I will let the RNG pick another nation for me, and so on.
Number of Years: Every 5 years*, roll 1d6:
5 years: 2+ (83% chance)
10 years: 3+ (56% cumulative chance)
15 years: 4+ (28% cumulative chance)
20 years: 5+ (9% cumulative chance)
25+ years: 6+
*Turns with an odd number of years (1444-1450 for example) will be rounded to the nearest 5.
This way, I won't be quite sure when my turn is ending, so won't be as tempted to play towards an artificial deadline.
My goal is to see what 'vanilla' EU4 has to offer across the entire timeframe of the game and the entire world, without a human player completely dominating or (like my last effort) getting destroyed.
Ironman is off, though I don't plan to reload unless absolutely necessary. Lucky nations are off, as I'm not convinced the monarch bonus isn't excessive - though that means Europe will go nuts. No bonuses for either side. The only mod I'm using is 'Colorblind' since it makes certain things stand out more.
Let's begin, shall we?
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Chapter I - MALI (1444-1465)
* Religious Disunity
* Bringing it Together
* Napping Towards Glory
* The Black and the Red
> Interlude I <
Chapter II - LAN XANG (1465-1490)
* That Was Fun
* Pettiness
* Still Alive
* Laotian Captivity
* Living Dangerously
> Interlude II <
Chapter III - TRIPOLI (1490-1505)
* My Muslim Brothers
* Vengeance Deferred
* Warmongering for Fun and Profit
> Interlude III <
Chapter IV - BENGAL (1505-1510)
* Death of a Tiger
Chapter V - TIMURIDS/MUGHALS (1510-1540)
* Whack a Mole
* Visiting our Neighbors
* A World of Hurt
* The Sound of Fur Flying
* Forward the Imperium
* Discretion
> Interlude IV <
Chapter VI - SAVOY (1540-1555)
* Fight Damn You!
* New Plan!
* Caretaker
> Interlude V <
Chapter VII - LUXEMBOURG (1555-1563)
* Let's Make This Fast
* Oops
Chapter VIII - MOROCCO (1563-1580)
* Uniting Barbary
* Thanks for the Memories
* The Desert Hyena
> Interlude VI <
Chapter IX - JAPAN (1580-1590)
* Call me Hideyoshi
* Domestic Problems
Chapter X - RUSSIA (1590-1610)
* It All Belongs to CatKnight
* Overextension!
* Giant in the Playground
* Revenge!
> Interlude VII <
Chapter XI - SHAN (1610-1615)
* No We Shan't!
Chapter XII - OMAN (1615-1625)
* The Valiant Die But Once
* The Mad Emir
> Interlude VIII <
Chapter XIII - HUNGARY (1625-1630)
* Standing at the Crossroads
Chapter XIV - DUTCH WEST INDIES (1630-1645)
> Interlude IX - The Colonial Game <
* Making the Boss Do His Job
* Give me Victory
* What Can Go Wrong?
> Interlude X: Halftime! <
Chapter XV - MANTUA (1645-1655)
* In the Dice of Johan We Find Solace
* Let's Get Ready to Rumble!
Chapter XVI - AUSTRIA (1655-1675)
* Color of Blood
* A Little Help From My Friends
* For Want of a Nail
* In Soviet Austria
> Interlude XI <
Chapter XVII - PALATINATE <HRE> (1675-1695)
* The Empire Strikes Back
* The Emperor's New Wars
* How Not to Make Peace
* Triering Too Hard
> Interlude XII <
Chapter XVIII - NAJD (1695-1700)
* You Najd, Bro?
Chapter XIX - YEMEN (1700-1725)
* Like a Bad Neighbor
* Westernizing on a Budget
* Dances with Event Generators
* World Cup!
* Elimination Round
> Interlude XIII <
Chapter XX - PORTUGAL (1725-1730)
* Bullying
Chapter XXI - HUNGARY II (1730-1750)
* Kicking Anthills
* Hungary for Turkey
* A Step Too Far
* Glory to Arstotzka
> Interlude XIV <
Chapter XXII - BAVARIA (1750-1765)
* Knife Fight!
* Where Are We Going?
* Death of a Mitrehead
> Interlude XV: One Year Celebration! <
Chapter XXIII - CATALAN CANADA (1765-1780)
* Politically Incorrect
* Events Gone Wild!
* Zzzzz
Chapter XXIV - MAINZ (1780-1800)
* Here There Be Dragons
* Ancient Threats
* Let It Burn
* Doing it With Style
> Interlude XVI: Art of Maps <
> Interlude XVII: Decision Time <
Chapter XXV - NETHERLANDS (1800-1821)
* Humping the Empire
* Delandaing France
* The Unbinding of Isaac
* The Final Countdown
EPILOGUE (The World in 1821)
* Pretty Charts
So, this AAR won't be like most of what you see. Its closest ancestor is possibly Three Countries, One Goal by Storey back in EU2. At least it's the one I thought of while preparing this. Hence, I'll borrow freely from his intro:
Storey said:This is not a character driven AAR.
This is not a story driven AAR.
This is not a comedic AAR.
Well all right there might be some humor at times but it isn’t going to be the focus of this AAR.
This is not a cute cuddly want to take home type of AAR.
There will be no deep inner meaning causing the reader to have to read between the lines in order to figure out what the hell this is all about.
This will be a RANDOM AAR - meaning I will let the RNG determine my starting country. I will then play for a number of years determined by the chart below. When done, I will let the RNG pick another nation for me, and so on.
Number of Years: Every 5 years*, roll 1d6:
5 years: 2+ (83% chance)
10 years: 3+ (56% cumulative chance)
15 years: 4+ (28% cumulative chance)
20 years: 5+ (9% cumulative chance)
25+ years: 6+
*Turns with an odd number of years (1444-1450 for example) will be rounded to the nearest 5.
This way, I won't be quite sure when my turn is ending, so won't be as tempted to play towards an artificial deadline.
My goal is to see what 'vanilla' EU4 has to offer across the entire timeframe of the game and the entire world, without a human player completely dominating or (like my last effort) getting destroyed.
Ironman is off, though I don't plan to reload unless absolutely necessary. Lucky nations are off, as I'm not convinced the monarch bonus isn't excessive - though that means Europe will go nuts. No bonuses for either side. The only mod I'm using is 'Colorblind' since it makes certain things stand out more.
Let's begin, shall we?
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Chapter I - MALI (1444-1465)
* Religious Disunity
* Bringing it Together
* Napping Towards Glory
* The Black and the Red
> Interlude I <
Chapter II - LAN XANG (1465-1490)
* That Was Fun
* Pettiness
* Still Alive
* Laotian Captivity
* Living Dangerously
> Interlude II <
Chapter III - TRIPOLI (1490-1505)
* My Muslim Brothers
* Vengeance Deferred
* Warmongering for Fun and Profit
> Interlude III <
Chapter IV - BENGAL (1505-1510)
* Death of a Tiger
Chapter V - TIMURIDS/MUGHALS (1510-1540)
* Whack a Mole
* Visiting our Neighbors
* A World of Hurt
* The Sound of Fur Flying
* Forward the Imperium
* Discretion
> Interlude IV <
Chapter VI - SAVOY (1540-1555)
* Fight Damn You!
* New Plan!
* Caretaker
> Interlude V <
Chapter VII - LUXEMBOURG (1555-1563)
* Let's Make This Fast
* Oops
Chapter VIII - MOROCCO (1563-1580)
* Uniting Barbary
* Thanks for the Memories
* The Desert Hyena
> Interlude VI <
Chapter IX - JAPAN (1580-1590)
* Call me Hideyoshi
* Domestic Problems
Chapter X - RUSSIA (1590-1610)
* It All Belongs to CatKnight
* Overextension!
* Giant in the Playground
* Revenge!
> Interlude VII <
Chapter XI - SHAN (1610-1615)
* No We Shan't!
Chapter XII - OMAN (1615-1625)
* The Valiant Die But Once
* The Mad Emir
> Interlude VIII <
Chapter XIII - HUNGARY (1625-1630)
* Standing at the Crossroads
Chapter XIV - DUTCH WEST INDIES (1630-1645)
> Interlude IX - The Colonial Game <
* Making the Boss Do His Job
* Give me Victory
* What Can Go Wrong?
> Interlude X: Halftime! <
Chapter XV - MANTUA (1645-1655)
* In the Dice of Johan We Find Solace
* Let's Get Ready to Rumble!
Chapter XVI - AUSTRIA (1655-1675)
* Color of Blood
* A Little Help From My Friends
* For Want of a Nail
* In Soviet Austria
> Interlude XI <
Chapter XVII - PALATINATE <HRE> (1675-1695)
* The Empire Strikes Back
* The Emperor's New Wars
* How Not to Make Peace
* Triering Too Hard
> Interlude XII <
Chapter XVIII - NAJD (1695-1700)
* You Najd, Bro?
Chapter XIX - YEMEN (1700-1725)
* Like a Bad Neighbor
* Westernizing on a Budget
* Dances with Event Generators
* World Cup!
* Elimination Round
> Interlude XIII <
Chapter XX - PORTUGAL (1725-1730)
* Bullying
Chapter XXI - HUNGARY II (1730-1750)
* Kicking Anthills
* Hungary for Turkey
* A Step Too Far
* Glory to Arstotzka
> Interlude XIV <
Chapter XXII - BAVARIA (1750-1765)
* Knife Fight!
* Where Are We Going?
* Death of a Mitrehead
> Interlude XV: One Year Celebration! <
Chapter XXIII - CATALAN CANADA (1765-1780)
* Politically Incorrect
* Events Gone Wild!
* Zzzzz
Chapter XXIV - MAINZ (1780-1800)
* Here There Be Dragons
* Ancient Threats
* Let It Burn
* Doing it With Style
> Interlude XVI: Art of Maps <
> Interlude XVII: Decision Time <
Chapter XXV - NETHERLANDS (1800-1821)
* Humping the Empire
* Delandaing France
* The Unbinding of Isaac
* The Final Countdown
EPILOGUE (The World in 1821)
* Pretty Charts
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