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RP: Take a look at this, old pal. My cavalry cuts Afghanistan in 2!
C: Impressive, if we dont take into account the fact that Afghanistan is already defeated.
RP: Its impressive anyway. Also, Ottomans attacked our lovely northern neighbours the Russians. They are so vulnerable to our attack that I almost feel pity for them.
C: Pity? Are you a Persian or a woman?
RP: Underline the word almost
C: Persians dont even "almost" feel pity for enemies! Now look, I have a risky plan that only my Immortals can take care of.
RP: Risky? Your Immortals are marching to an undefended province!
C: With Northern-Afghan women in it!
RP: I am in no mood for arqueing. Look, Scots made first annexation by devouring French!
C: French beeing first to fall was no surprise to me. Afterall, they are French. We all know about French military history filled with glorius military victories.
Ahh, my Immortals survived the horrible sight of Northern-Afghan women. We created a nice encirclement in Bukhara! Now I we shall attack it and destroy them!
RP: What a magnicificent plan!
C: I know, Rezzie, I know.
RP: That was irony. It is also irony that we get our first fighter squadron after all Afghan planes have been destroyed.
C: Who needs fighters when we have Immortals!
RP: Yes, your Immortals were very impressive in Bukhara. Didnt beat few garrisons without food nor ammunition.
C: Ummm, yeah...it was a...tactical defeat because...we wanted to make Afghans think they can still win. Killing false feel of superiority makes killing those divisions twice as fun!
RP: Yeah, sure it was all planned.
C: And planned well, also! Look at this magnicificent victory!
RP: Well, we got another stack of fresh men from our barrackses. Id like to see Ottomans survive our invasion!
George Lucas: Cut! Cut! Cut! Watchers dont want to know about your new troops! They want blood! They want explosions! They want Starfighters!
RP: Ok, we wont tell about our production anymore, George. You will get your blood, explosions and Starfighters.
GL: Good. Now lets continue!
C: Impressive, if we dont take into account the fact that Afghanistan is already defeated.
RP: Its impressive anyway. Also, Ottomans attacked our lovely northern neighbours the Russians. They are so vulnerable to our attack that I almost feel pity for them.
C: Pity? Are you a Persian or a woman?
RP: Underline the word almost
C: Persians dont even "almost" feel pity for enemies! Now look, I have a risky plan that only my Immortals can take care of.
RP: Risky? Your Immortals are marching to an undefended province!
C: With Northern-Afghan women in it!
RP: I am in no mood for arqueing. Look, Scots made first annexation by devouring French!
C: French beeing first to fall was no surprise to me. Afterall, they are French. We all know about French military history filled with glorius military victories.
Ahh, my Immortals survived the horrible sight of Northern-Afghan women. We created a nice encirclement in Bukhara! Now I we shall attack it and destroy them!
RP: What a magnicificent plan!
C: I know, Rezzie, I know.
RP: That was irony. It is also irony that we get our first fighter squadron after all Afghan planes have been destroyed.
C: Who needs fighters when we have Immortals!
RP: Yes, your Immortals were very impressive in Bukhara. Didnt beat few garrisons without food nor ammunition.
C: Ummm, yeah...it was a...tactical defeat because...we wanted to make Afghans think they can still win. Killing false feel of superiority makes killing those divisions twice as fun!
RP: Yeah, sure it was all planned.
C: And planned well, also! Look at this magnicificent victory!
RP: Well, we got another stack of fresh men from our barrackses. Id like to see Ottomans survive our invasion!
George Lucas: Cut! Cut! Cut! Watchers dont want to know about your new troops! They want blood! They want explosions! They want Starfighters!
RP: Ok, we wont tell about our production anymore, George. You will get your blood, explosions and Starfighters.
GL: Good. Now lets continue!
Ahh Cyrus, I really do not think defeat is a word in his dictionary - leastways not as being applied to the Immortals.
Who is going to tell Cyrus that the pesky Scots are doing a better job of kicking ass and taking names? I don't remember the last time that Afghanistan was a world power? It was only a couple of centuries ago that France was a world power. But then again when was the last time that Persia was even a power let alone a world power? 
C: Trollollollolloo, Peshawar is going to fall.
RP: I didnt know you had musical talent.
C: What? No! Real men dont sing!
RP: That was pretty good actually.
C: It wasnt me! It was that...cat!
RP: I dont know was it your singing or what but our men at Peshawar totally devastated Afghan defences in matter of hours.
C: I didnt sing...Look, the Hellens want to replay their success 2500 years ago and attacked Ottoman Empire!
RP: Trollollolloo, Peshawar is going to fall. Mister, we have a new hit song here!
C: God damn you, Reza. The important thing here is that Siemens has developed...
RP: Another lame copy of Nokia?
C: No, they developed new guns for our infantry.
RP: Since when has Siemens developed guns?
C: Siemens IRAN, Rez. Siemens IRAN.
RP: What are our scientists doing right now, by the way?
C: Trans-Iranian Railway Company has almost developed census tabulating machines, Anglo-Iranian Oil started developing tools for our factories, Douglas Aircraft Company is doing steady progress inventing better bombers and State Aircraft Company is creating Tankettes. Oh, and you are just about to invent Firepower Focus Doctrine.
RP: I am?
Wait! I just got the best idea ever! In battles we shall concentrate on shooting our guns instead of showing our buttocks!
C: You cant deny the greatest weapon of Immortals!
RP: Now I shall create a Grand Battle Plan for Persian Army. In the future, Persians are going to use cover! And listen to their generals!
C: I cant wait...Saudis are offering us peace. A white peace, that is. White peaces are for women and Saudi-Arabians, we wont accept!
RP: Talking about peaces, Indians made peace with Afghanistan. Now Afghanistan is reduced to small mountainous region. We shall destroy them!
C: We shall what?
RP: We shall attack Ottoman Empire! And recreate the old Persian Empire!
Conan: Can Reza and Cyrus beat the Ottomans? Ottomans, led by Suleyman the Magnicifent and Osman I, are still a worthy opponent, despite its many wars. See this, and many other wars in next episode of...
All except Polish man: Fight For Your Lives!
Polish man: What was this show called?
RP: I didnt know you had musical talent.
C: What? No! Real men dont sing!
RP: That was pretty good actually.
C: It wasnt me! It was that...cat!
RP: I dont know was it your singing or what but our men at Peshawar totally devastated Afghan defences in matter of hours.
C: I didnt sing...Look, the Hellens want to replay their success 2500 years ago and attacked Ottoman Empire!
RP: Trollollolloo, Peshawar is going to fall. Mister, we have a new hit song here!
C: God damn you, Reza. The important thing here is that Siemens has developed...
RP: Another lame copy of Nokia?
C: No, they developed new guns for our infantry.
RP: Since when has Siemens developed guns?
C: Siemens IRAN, Rez. Siemens IRAN.
RP: What are our scientists doing right now, by the way?
C: Trans-Iranian Railway Company has almost developed census tabulating machines, Anglo-Iranian Oil started developing tools for our factories, Douglas Aircraft Company is doing steady progress inventing better bombers and State Aircraft Company is creating Tankettes. Oh, and you are just about to invent Firepower Focus Doctrine.
RP: I am?
Wait! I just got the best idea ever! In battles we shall concentrate on shooting our guns instead of showing our buttocks!
C: You cant deny the greatest weapon of Immortals!
RP: Now I shall create a Grand Battle Plan for Persian Army. In the future, Persians are going to use cover! And listen to their generals!
C: I cant wait...Saudis are offering us peace. A white peace, that is. White peaces are for women and Saudi-Arabians, we wont accept!
RP: Talking about peaces, Indians made peace with Afghanistan. Now Afghanistan is reduced to small mountainous region. We shall destroy them!
C: We shall what?
RP: We shall attack Ottoman Empire! And recreate the old Persian Empire!
Conan: Can Reza and Cyrus beat the Ottomans? Ottomans, led by Suleyman the Magnicifent and Osman I, are still a worthy opponent, despite its many wars. See this, and many other wars in next episode of...
All except Polish man: Fight For Your Lives!
Polish man: What was this show called?
Which means their a real danger as we see the Persians aren't all too able taking the rest of Afghanistan. Well, now that they learned to shoot they should manage to win in Anatolia as well.
EvilSanta said:
Helping fellow AAR readers, thus making this thread more helpful for everyone and indirectly friendly to those AAR readers. I thank you for welcoming me and no, I'm a male. (What made you think I was a girl?)
C: See my grandiose plan! Ottomans stand no chance against it!
RP: Did you draw that yourself or was it your 1-year old daughter? Your drawings are so difficult to separate from each other.
C: Not funny, Rez. Atleast I am wise!
RP: Who invented firepower focus?
C: But you didnt win decisively in Baghdad, did you?
And look what we get from this victory! It is our core so we get full use of its resources.
RP: But I am a tech team and a field marshal!
C: Thats cool but I am busy invading Anatolia where majority of Ottoman forces facing us are.
RP: You waste good men there. It is well-fortified mountainous region.
C: Really?
RP: By the way, our scientists just discovered census tabulating machine!
C: Census tabulating machine?
RP: It is magical device that makes all tech teams, including me, 5% smarter. That doesnt affect you so you are as dumb as ever.
C: I dont need 5% increase to my intelligence, I have destroyed all Ottoman resistance in Arabia!
RP: That 1 lone garrison in Baghdad?
C: Yes! And now Ottomans are at our mercy! It gives me confidence to attack Afghanistan.
RP: With my 5% intelligence increase I can say it is stupid thing to do. My 5% intelligence increase tells me to give guns to our Immortals so they dont have to fight with just their swords.
C: Guns! Thats brilliant! How did I never throught about that?
RP: Census tabulating machine affects only the cool guys.
RP: Did you draw that yourself or was it your 1-year old daughter? Your drawings are so difficult to separate from each other.
C: Not funny, Rez. Atleast I am wise!
RP: Who invented firepower focus?
C: But you didnt win decisively in Baghdad, did you?
And look what we get from this victory! It is our core so we get full use of its resources.
RP: But I am a tech team and a field marshal!
C: Thats cool but I am busy invading Anatolia where majority of Ottoman forces facing us are.
RP: You waste good men there. It is well-fortified mountainous region.
C: Really?
RP: By the way, our scientists just discovered census tabulating machine!
C: Census tabulating machine?
RP: It is magical device that makes all tech teams, including me, 5% smarter. That doesnt affect you so you are as dumb as ever.
C: I dont need 5% increase to my intelligence, I have destroyed all Ottoman resistance in Arabia!
RP: That 1 lone garrison in Baghdad?
C: Yes! And now Ottomans are at our mercy! It gives me confidence to attack Afghanistan.
RP: With my 5% intelligence increase I can say it is stupid thing to do. My 5% intelligence increase tells me to give guns to our Immortals so they dont have to fight with just their swords.
C: Guns! Thats brilliant! How did I never throught about that?
RP: Census tabulating machine affects only the cool guys.
