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Luck Of The AARish (Irish) Story Thread

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I awoke to the sound of a bird's morning song, and the sun's beaming rays. Nearby me, sat my dog, who had stayed with me throughout the night. I had in my hand a flask of whiskey, perhaps this was the cause of my strange dream. I went over to the tree stump where the Leprechaun in my dream had lived, and I examined it carefully. Even through careful inspection, I failed to find a doorway, or indeed anything else out of the ordinary. It was merely a decaying old tree stump, which I kicked in frustration.

It was at this moment, that I noticed a patch of clover growing nearby the stump. "The Leprechaun's garden" I laughed to myself. In the center of this patch of clover was something straight out of my dream, which caught my eye. A 7 leaf clover! "Grows only once a millenia, in a secret place known only to the Leprechaun" I laughed, as I plucked it from the ground. Close inspection revealed nothing out of the ordinary, aside from the 7 leafs. "Oh well, perhaps I can sell it to a superstitious fool somewhere" I said to myself, as I placed it in my pocket.

Seeing nothing else out of the ordinary, and believing the Leprechaun to have been an alcohol induced hallucination, I called forth my dog, and set off for home. Little did I suspect the trouble that awaited me along the way...

(To be continued)
 
I followed the winding road as it led me into the heart of a deep forest. The morning sun, became little more than a trickle through the dense growth of the forest, and even my dog seemed a little worried about what lay ahead. We came to a bridge that passed over a stream, and over the sound of the running water we heard a voice cry out: "Halt! Who goes there?"

From behind a bend in the road, emerged three shadowy figures, who began to advance towards me. I made ready my bow, though I only had one arrow left to me. "For trespassing in our forest, we demand 100% of your gold, in exchange for your life." Said one of the shadowy figures.

"Upon my death, for I am Laisrean, son of Larkin, and I owe you nothing." Was my response. But at that moment, two more figures emerged, and I knew I was in over my head. I let fly my one and only arrow, which pierced the throat of the largest of the men, whom I took to be the leader. He uttered a final gurgling sound, before he collapsed in a pool of his own blood.

At this, the others cried out, and drew forth their blades, they now ran at me. I reached for my knife, but found only the flask of whiskey, which I threw at them in frustration. "Damn that Leprechaun to hell!" I excaimed, as I searched in vain, for something to use as a weapon.

Meanwhile, my dog was giving one of the thieves a serious mauling. Blood covered his arm, and he stabbed at my dog as he cried out in pain. Soon, my dog's blood spilled out as well, and he died with a yelp.

The situation was becoming desperate for me. I happened to find a branch, which I planned to make use of as a club. I swung the branch, which met the skull of one of the men with a crash. He collapsed, but the others were soon upon me. I felt their blades rip into me, and then I felt my heart being pierced. My blood spewed forth, and I collapsed. The last thing I remember was the voice of one of the thieves say to the others, "Quickly, take the gold! Someone is coming!"

And then, the darkness claimed me....
 
Originally posted by Prufrock451
Your narrator lost one battle and his enemies demand his entire treasury. Typical! ;)
Click to expand...

lol. Well, actually this wasn't really a battle in the EU sense, this was just a confrontation with thieves in the forest. But even though our mighty hero has fallen, it should be noted that he managed to take out 2 of the thieves before he died, and his dog gave another one a serious mauling. A victory in the sense that he inflicted more casualties than he recieved.

The real battles will come later once Eire butts heads with England. ;)
 
Captain Krunch, are you the same krunch that was in the AAR boards last year? The name rang a bell and I had to look at the Italy AAR to place it. If your not him, well hell thats ok, welcome aboard skipper:D

Your AAR is quite interesting too, nice writing
 
Originally posted by Warspite
Captain Krunch, are you the same krunch that was in the AAR boards last year? The name rang a bell and I had to look at the Italy AAR to place it. If your not him, well hell thats ok, welcome aboard skipper:D

Your AAR is quite interesting too, nice writing
Click to expand...

Thanks. :)

No, that person isn't me. But I've been asked before if I was him. This was just the only name I could think of when I registered. :D
 
The eerie calmness of the vast forest was interupted by the sound of singing, though the singing was lukewarm. A band of men met in a clearing, 2 members of their party had been killed, and another was wounded.

"Throughout the forests, we roam
For in the shadows, we find home.
Hidden behind the forest leaves
Lurks the mighty Forest Thieves!

With a stab, and with a slash
We will end your life, and take your cash
Adding to our growing stash
To spend in stores, and on filthy whores!

We are not Robin Hood
For we do not believe in doing good
We will rob from the rich, as well as the poor
We will steal from them all, and then steal some more!"

The singing repeated once more, and then came to a stop. One of the men stood atop a tree stump and began to speak. "Neal and Andrew have fallen, and I have lost a great deal of blood." He said, while looking at his mauled arm. "But while our comrades are gone, we can rejoice in knowing we have less of us with whom to divide the spoils, and today we have done rather well. Our last victim was a tough one, but he was also wealthy." The man said, as he peered into the purse filled with gold coins. "Now how shall we divide our shares?"

"I shall take 100% of the gold as my share!" Said an unfamiliar voice. The thieves turned to look in the direction of the voice. There upon a log sat a very small man, he was rather small even for a midget. He was dressed in green, with finely crafted shoes, and in his hand he held a pipe, which he then puffed on.

"How did you find our lair?!" Asked one of the men, as they all drew forth their weapons. "I know this forest like the back of me hand. I believe you have some gold that once belonged to a friend of mine, hand it over to me, and I will spare your lives." said the small man

Laughter echoed through the trees, as the band of men advanced upon the intruder. They swung their blades, but at the same instant the small man disappeared. The men looked around in confusion. "Up here!" The small man replied, now standing atop a tree branch above the men.

The small man then jumped from the branch on top of the leader, and bit down on his throat. Blood drenched the leader's clothes, as he cried out and stabbed at the small man biting him. The midget at that moment disappeared, and the man's knife pierced his own throat.

Shrill high pitched laughter came from every direction, and the other members of the party now sensed they were up against something that was not human. They dropped their gold and fled in every direction....

(To be continued)
 
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Was that a little too violent for everyone? I promise my next update will be a break from the violence... :D
 
I awoke in unfamiliar surroundings, and without the knowledge of how I got there. I was laying in a bed in a small room. Flames flickered and danced on logs in a nearby fireplace. I attempted to get up, but felt a sharp pain...

I cried out, and then remembered what had happened. I was ambushed by thieves, and had been cut and stabbed... my money was taken. In horror I felt my chest, and a puncture wound which penetrated my heart. By all accounts, I should have been dead.

At this moment the door creaked open, and a woman entered the room. She was more beautiful, than I could accurately portray in words. Her cream skin was pure and unblemished. Only her cheeks, held the slightest hint of color. Her long, dark brown (OOC: bet no one expected that. ;) ) hair, framed her beautiful face. Her eyes were a deep bluish green color, similar to the reflection of the green Irish hills in a blue lake. Her pinkish lips formed a slight smile, as they spoke to me.

"About time, you woke up. Though, it should be considered fortunate that you are alive at all, for your survival has surprised all of us." She said to me. "All of you? Who are you?" I replied. "I am Toiréasa, and you are at the Inn of the Green Clover."

"But how, how did I get here? I died.... Oh I get it, I am indeed dead, and this is heaven. That would explain you." I replied. She merely laughed, and then answered. "No, you are not dead. Eileánóir found you lying along the road into town, as well as your dead companions and dog."

"They were not my companions!" I exclaimed. "Please forgive me for shouting at you, they are not my companions. They are thieves who had robbed me, and left me for dead. But I killed 2 before they got to me. But my dog...."

"I am sorry. Many people pass through here with reports of the Forest Thieves. You stood up to them, which makes you braver than most. But it very nearly cost you your life. Now stay here and rest, I will check back on you later." She said, as she walked out of the door.

As for me, I was not about to go anywhere, for I had much thinking to do. And of course, wanted to be in her presence once again...
 
Just catching up on this excellent story.

I love your writing and the scenes are certainly not too violent for me. General slaughter is fairly "safe" material but I'd avoid getting too graphic if you have any episodes involving torture...(and rape would definitely be treading on thin ice unless very carefully handled). Just keep in mind that there could easily be some younger readers (early teens or even pre-teen) and you'll be safe.

I only get the chance to read each AAR about once or twice a week so forgive me if my response time is slow...just keep going and I (and others) will catch up to you as soon as we can. :)
 
Wow, Captain Crunch, this really is quite a story! :)

Makes a Red Ed proud to be a member of the ESP... ;)

I guess I'll go for Guinness tonight. :D
 
Originally posted by MrT
Just catching up on this excellent story.

I love your writing and the scenes are certainly not too violent for me. General slaughter is fairly "safe" material but I'd avoid getting too graphic if you have any episodes involving torture...(and rape would definitely be treading on thin ice unless very carefully handled). Just keep in mind that there could easily be some younger readers (early teens or even pre-teen) and you'll be safe.

I only get the chance to read each AAR about once or twice a week so forgive me if my response time is slow...just keep going and I (and others) will catch up to you as soon as we can. :)
Click to expand...

That was a concern I had. But if what I've posted so far is acceptable, then the rest of my AAR should be fine, as I don't plan on getting much more graphic than I already have. Rape and torture are not my style, and I have absolutely no plans to include them in this AAR. If I did, I'd do it in an abstract way though.

And thanks, I am glad someone is reading this. :)
 
Originally posted by Norgesvenn
Wow, Captain Crunch, this really is quite a story! :)

Makes a Red Ed proud to be a member of the ESP... ;)

I guess I'll go for Guinness tonight. :D
Click to expand...

Thanks. Did you read my forest thieves theme song? And if so, what did you think? :D
 
Well, Captain... not a bunch devoted to solidarity and debt relief, surely? More like... "The Gnomes of Zürich", eh? :D
 
Was it true? Could it be, that the Leprechaun really made me immortal? Was there even a Leprechaun at all? These thoughts, among many others, occupied my time, as I waited in this room. Though the room was small, the bed and atmosphere were quite comfortable, and I felt no rush to get up.

In time the door creaked open, and assuming it was the beautiful Toiréasa, my heart began to feel restless. However, the one who entered the room was quite short and heavy. She was also much older than Toiréasa. Perhaps it was her mother, though I seen little resemblance.

"Hello there, my name is Eileánóir." Said the short woman. "I was heading towards the stream to collect some water, when I came upon you and the thieves, lying wounded on the path. I ran back and got help to haul you back, and I insist you stay until you are healed."

"I am afraid that I will be unable to pay you for my stay, as the thieves made off with my money. But I thank you for the kindness you have bestowed upon me." I replied.

"That is quite alright. And besides, it seems as if someone is already paying for your stay..." Eileánóir said. "Really?! Who?" I replied, a little surprised that anyone would so suddenly know I was staying here.

"Whoever it was, also left a letter addressed to you." She replied, as she reached into her pocket. I thanked her, as she handed the letter to me. "I will now leave you in peace, and I'll be sure that Toiréasa checks on you later." She said, as she left the room.

The light from the fireplace was insufficient to read, so I lit the lamp on the table. The leader was addressed from a "L. Leprechaun" and it read:

"Dear Sooty,

Yes, it is true that you are immortal. I knew all this would happen in advance, and have already made the appropriate arrangments, as you can plainly see. You are proving to shape up into the hero I know you will become.

Now, back to business... Once you complete your stay at the Inn, you are obligated to complete your first task, as was our agreement. As you know, your first task will be to unite the clans of Eire, under the banner of Ulster.

Eóghan II is awaiting your assistance in Ulster, though he himself does not know it yet. You are to journey north to him, and assist him in anyway necessary, to secure his place as King of Ulster.

I'll be seeing you soon.

Sincerely,
L. Leprechaun

P.S. I have your gold."

And upon reading the last word, the letter exploded in a cloud of smoke. As I choked on the ash, I heard laughter, and a voice which seemed to come from the fireplace call out "Sooty!".

Narrator: Meanwhile, a small smiling man enters a brothel in Dublin. In his hand is a bag of coins.... But that is another story.
 
Out of boredom I got out of bed and searched the room. In a corner, near the fireplace, sat a table, and upon that table sat a small pile of books. I picked one of them up, it was a book of poetry. I returned to my bed with the book and began reading.

I read until there was a knock on the door. The door then opened, and in came Toiréasa. Her long brown hair, was now tied together in a braided pony tail. She was obviously dressed for work, and she carried in some food, which she set on the table beside my bed.

"If it interests you, here is some food, and some ale to go with it." She said, as she set the tray down. I thanked her, but I had little more to say, as my thoughts were occupied by her beauty. "I see you found the books. This one I like really well." She said, commenting on the book of poetry in my hands.

"You are literate?" I asked. "I was taught how to read in the monastery. You see, I...." She paused, and then continued: "I don't have the time to explain to you right now. But I will be happy to talk with you later this evening." She said.

"That will be nice. I will talk to you again, later." I told her. She merely smiled, and left the room.
 
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