Åbo Castle was actually the residence of a Swedish-king-to-be some four hundred years later, it ought to be fine enough for a Swedish-wanna-be-king in the dark ages.
The place still looks like shit...
There and and Never Back Again: Escape From Sweden
- Thread starter Kommunaut
- Start date
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The place still looks like shit...
Hi everybody, just here to say that there may be an update later, but after not, there won't be one for a while. I'm leaving for Spain tomorrow, and will be gone for two weeks.
Quick thinking by Bo! Still, Bo, King, doesn't have that certain je ne sais quoi that 'Bo, Duke' has... The sacrifices one has to make for the good of the realm, right?
Great use of the picture and very nice indeed to have Stenkil make an appearance.
EDIT: Enjoy your trip to Spain!
Great use of the picture and very nice indeed to have Stenkil make an appearance.
EDIT: Enjoy your trip to Spain!
Hello everyone! As of today, I have been back for a week, and am finally ready to update. I've been noticing images disappearing, and will be fixing that later, by transferring the tags to my shiny new imageshack account. But for now, the feedback.
Indeed, but Bo, King did demand the crown to be solid gold. Maybe next time he'll just use gold leaf.
Most kings would. Bo doesn't want to share power with his vassals.
Maybe later.
If only. That would be awesome.
I'll keep that in mind. I was using google translator.
Wanna-be king? Bo would have your head for this insult!
Then it's a good thing I didn't go Über-anachronism and use Suommenlinna
Thanks, it was awesome! Alas, the time of Bo, Duke is over. Long live the king!
I did. Thanks.
Finally, a new update.
Indeed, but Bo, King did demand the crown to be solid gold. Maybe next time he'll just use gold leaf.
One of the best things about becoming a king is as you give away your duchies you get less BB, allowing yo to go on a post coronation Invading streak.
Most kings would. Bo doesn't want to share power with his vassals.
Turku Castle isn't fitting for a King. Try getting a new appropriate one...
Maybe later.
Let`s vote Stenkil for Pope
If only. That would be awesome.
I'll keep that in mind. I was using google translator.
Åbo Castle was actually the residence of a Swedish-king-to-be some four hundred years later, it ought to be fine enough for a Swedish-wanna-be-king in the dark ages.
Wanna-be king? Bo would have your head for this insult!
Then it's a good thing I didn't go Über-anachronism and use Suommenlinna
The place still looks like shit...
Quick thinking by Bo! Still, Bo, King, doesn't have that certain je ne sais quoi that 'Bo, Duke' has... The sacrifices one has to make for the good of the realm, right?
Great use of the picture and very nice indeed to have Stenkil make an appearance.
EDIT: Enjoy your trip to Spain!
Thanks, it was awesome! Alas, the time of Bo, Duke is over. Long live the king!
I did. Thanks.
Finally, a new update.
There and Never Back Again: Escape From Sweden
A blatant Alfred Packer ripoff
In Which The Ending Blurb Is Instated
Turku, Finland March 15, 1097
"Your Grace, I was wondering if you were going to be giving out the Duchy titles any time soon?"
"No."
"But your father promised!"
"If it means that much to you, you can take it up with him."
(Bo starts to draw his sword)
"That's it! Enough is enough!
I've had it with your threats and insults! We are now at war!"
"Are you... Are you serious?"
"This is about honor! About principles!"
(Turning towards the other counts)
"There is a spectre haunting Finland! The spectre of Feudalism!
All the Powers of Finland have entered into a holy alliance to exorcise this spectre: Bishop and King, Serf and Burgher, and the Pagan Chiefs.
Where are the nobles in opposition that have not been decried as Feudalistic by their opponents in power?
Where is the Opposition that has not hurled back the branding reproach of Feudalism, against the more advanced opposition leaders, as well as against its progressive adversaries?
And dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take our Prima Noctae!!!
"I'm not taking that away.
"Oh, really?"
"Really."
"Well, my point still stands."
Well, seeing as my personal guard is larger than your pathetic army, it doesn't really matter.
I mean, really. You have no chance. I already win. Your rebellion was over before it started.
Normally, I would just remove your lands and force you to live as a serf, but because of that little speech, I'm sentencing you to death by Iron Maiden."
"Iron Maiden? Excellent!"
"What's so excellent about being put in a box full of spikes?"
"Oh, never mind then.
Wait, box of spikes? Jesus Christ, I wasn't expecting the Swedish Inquisition!"
(Everyone looks at the door expectantly)
Uppland, Sweden
"Hurry up, it's the ending text!"
"There's an ending text?"
"It was just added to the AAR"
And so, with Tolir in the clutches of the Inquisition, the realm is safe from the threat of civil war once more. But will it be enough? Probably. Or not. Anyway, not much happened in this episode, but will the next one be more eventful? Find out on the next There and Never Back Again: Escape From Sweden!
Turku, Finland
"Hurry! Hurry!"
"No one expects the Swedish-"
"Oh Bugger!"
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Well, the inquisition has got to be better at converting than the sceptical priest...
Nobles of Finland, where be you?
Or furthermore, be you more than the amount of my fingers?
Or furthermore, be you more than the amount of my fingers?
Lol, a great read. You just gotta love the wiered religious climate of your realm with sceptical bishops and well a Swedish inquisition.:rofl:
~Lord Valentine~
~Lord Valentine~
So, does Tolir live, because of the Swedish Inquisition's inability to keep its appointment? Otherwise, I'm going to miss the old bugger...
Good to see you write again!
Good to see you write again!
There and Never Back Again: Escape From Sweden
A blatant Alfred Packer ripoff
In Which The Fourth Wall is Broken
"Hello everybody.
It has come to my attention that forum member Kommunaut has not updated for some time, so in the interest of keeping everything moving I will be taking over.
So, before I tell you about my amazing adventures and glorious conquests, I suppose some reader feedback should be answered."
Well, the inquisition has got to be better at converting than the sceptical priest...
"Yes, Stenkil the Agnostic was horrible with conversions. That's why I appointed my brother to bishop. He's much better.
Nepotism is a way of life.
Moving on:"
"Exactly.
Plus, blue is just a much nicer color. It just seems so... Swedish!"
Nobles of Finland, where be you?
Or furthermore, be you more than the amount of my fingers?
"Well, most of the nobles of Finland live in Sweden.
You know, the old nobles of Uppland...
Plus, some of the Finnish chiefs were given fiefs to help incorporate them into the realm, and to Christianize them."
"It would appear that you enjoyed that speech much more than I.
At least someone appreciated it, though I bet that would be small comfort for him now."
"That's what happens when a duke who originally didn't pay much attention to religious matters becomes a crusader.
Also, the Inquisition is too useful for me to disband."
Stupid Tolir...
"That's something we definately agree on."
"Yes, it was quite droll, wasn't it?"
"Alas, poor Tolir, I knew him...
Though, truth be told, I rather wish I could have known him not.
And it really is a shame that Kommunaut is dragging his feet on updating, which is why I have taken over!
So now that that's out of the way, on to business:
The Path To Glory: A Tale About Bo
By: Bo Av Munsö
A Bit over the top?
Fine, whatever, I'll try to take this seriously.
Now, unfortunately I'm not great with your future techno-ology, so all I have to work with is Screenshots.
Now it all starts here:
I decided that my realm would look good if I added Estonia to it.
So, to get the war started, I desecrated their holy lands.
Yeah, that's the stuff! Stupid pagans deserved to be lit on fire, anyway.
So then came the attack plan. I decided to do something simple.
Knud Knytling has nothing on me!
So we massacred their armies, and started sieging the place, when the cowards suddenly converted to Christianity!
Also, Kiev split up. Those Russians and their Gavelkind!
So Novgorod and such belong to Beloozero, who is the same color on that map as me.
Man, that crap gets confusing. Why is black such a popular color?
But after claiming their titles and sieging their lands, it was all mine!
Victory is sweet!"
"Wow, you really suck at this."
"Kommunaut! What are you doing here?!
And what are you talking about?"
"Well, you forgot to put dates anywhere, though I guess the screenshots help with that, and your writing style is just so passe."
"Says the man who just stole a writing style from Alfred Packer."
"Yes, but I chose the road less ripped off."
"Because it sucks, just like you. Hey, you haven't even been repairing image links like you said!"
"Do I have to F12 'Die' next time I load up CK?"
"Fine, I'll behave."
"Good, then I'll do the ending text."
So, this little experiment has ended. Hopefully, I won't be bored enough to do anything like that again, I really am terrible at the picture commentary style of writing. And the argument with my character? Seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, a bit more on topic: Bo has noticed his similarly colored neighbors, and his need for maps to look logical is well known. There can really be only one outcome. Read about it in the next installment of There and Never Back Again:Escape From Sweden!
Funny how he was comparing himself the Knud Knytling, a man at the head of a dead end county while he was the leader of the most powerful duchy in the Swedish kingdom.
Still, I thought it was quite a nice update...
Still, I thought it was quite a nice update...
Maybe we could calm Bo`s imperialism if everything besides his realm is shown in pink on the map.
Boo like Bo.
I loved the update!
But conquer more I say!
Finland can never be enough big.
Remember ACA!
I loved the update!
But conquer more I say!
Finland can never be enough big.
Remember ACA!
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Niiice... Always easy to win an argument if you have the power to decide life and death, eh?
Like your avatar, by the way.