Part 7.8 - Prussia
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ScribleScrable: Yes indeed, Crusading!!! Lol...I do love the way Greece looks as well. If only the HRE and Italy could break up as prettily...
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LordEnglish: It could go Breton, but for some reason I haven't seen the Karlings do any crusading. They're quite the diverse family though, Bretons, Bedouins, and Franks, think there's even more cultural variety amongst that dynasty but can't remember.
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Hiryuu: Yes indeed! Maybe the Ice Queen needs to work on her tan?
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Stuyvesant: I think you're right about the Ice Queen and Adam having different ideas on what "converting to the cause" means. Adam is probably looking to have some noble toys instead of the usual run of the mill peasant. Well if the Ice Queen was indeed the cat she definitely got bored and finally had her mouse for dinner!
And yes off for a sunny vacation to Sicily! I don't think she'll be having her heart thawed though, I actually think it'll be more along the lines of "Winter is Coming" (not to steal another line from GoT...But if its the only way to grab more land and a possible kingdom title might as well shoot for it!
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Part 7.8 - Prussia
Time to buy a swimsuit, and sunscreen because the Ice Queen is on her way for Spring Vacation, in balmy Sicily!
Well, I shouldn't be cheering CKII does have a tendency to slap me for setting foot in Sicily. In another AAR (the Welfs) I had a King pick up the Great Pox down there due to shagging the locals. Luckily for us we have the Ice Queen at the helm and she isn't down with the shagging nonsense. Her hubby Adam on the other hand...well...
We also decide to hire two Holy Orders, because hey why not!
And in a moment of martial brilliance I decide to be cheap and instead of sending our newly minted 15K stack of Christian Icy Doom off on the boats, we say lets march through central Europe and see the sites along the way.
As you can see the CID is heading through what has become multi-colored Germany. The lands we're in are well Anglo-Saxon Saxony, bordered by chaotic always rebelling Pomerania, as well as cancerous purple blotches of Karling ruled Brittany. Apparently Brittany got sick of being a part of the Big Grey Blob and said deuces! And what makes that even better is they're fully independent, not just rebelling.
Later I will show why the Holy Bretonian Emperor has decided NOT to retake Brittany.
Eight months later we arrive in Italy and begin plotting our first couple of moves.
We fight off a few small stacks that number a total of 900, and move on into start laying siege, which is what the Pope and the rest of the Christians are doing as well.
This goes on for the first six months of 1167, no real battles or action taking place as the Muslim world is still mustering its forces to send to defend Sicily.
In June we finish occupying a settlement. When we're notified that Pope Sixtus IV "the Monk" has died and is replaced by Pope Pius II, who just so happens to be in his 70s infirm and ill. So I highly doubt our new Pope will last long.
At this point the Caliph of the Shias decide its a perfect time to strike.
This isn't exactly the best idea the Shia Caliphate has had. But I suppose it could potentially work in their favor. Although, I don't think their target is well-advised.
The Ice Queen then sees a big fat stack of Muslim soldiers entering the playing field. 20,000 strong, which should have outnumbered her, but as she deployed her men off to chase, the Christian lords rallied around the Ice Queen to lend aid.
The Battle of Salerno would then take place.
Slaughter! Slaughter! Slaughter!
The Ice Queen wins a magnificent victory at a fraction of the cost to her own men. This makes the war-score jump dramatically as well. I went to check where we stand in contribution and sadly we're in second but quickly closing in on the Teutonic Order.
Between October and November we chase the retreating Muslims from Salerno, killing each man we catch.
Some more time passes and another battle of Amalfi takes place that we win easily. After which the Ice Queen decides its high time to lay some more sieges.
We're neck and neck with the Teutons separated by only 4% but they're also laying siege and racking points up quickly. Not too mention that the war-score is shooting up towards the 90s now.
By October of 1168 we capture Sollento, giving the Catholics 100 war-score and a chance for Pope Pius to reclaim Sicily.
And the winner is....
Figures.
The TO wins again. We were soo close too. If only the Crusade could have lasted another couple months. Instead another man blocks the way to greatness for the Ice Queen.
So we return to frigid Denmark so Gudrun can chill her heart once more. In celebration however King Odd invites her to a feast. He's probably just happy that his vassal didn't accidentally get lost in Sicily and get crowned a Queen by that Pope guy.
Disappointed that we've not accomplished anything I go and check in on the Witch-King Herri of Cyprus.
Those maluses! When we last checked on him he had quite a few, but now, he's just shooting for all time bad-ass.
I mean who else can be Greedy yet Kind, a Glutton and a Gardner, (is that eye one paranoid?), Wrothful and Stressed, Possessed yet Depressed, and to kick it all off a...
...Leper!
He would have made a perfect character to center a mini-narrative AAR around.
I can't help but wish the Ice Queen possessed some of those traits.
As I watch the game clock slowly click towards 1170 meaning our time with the Ice Queen is almost over, I get sad that we accomplished pretty much nothing here. Besides make Sweden even more powerful (oopsies!).
But CKII decides to offer us one parting goodbye to sweet icy hearted Gudrun.
I can see this conversation right now, almost like I could picture her yanking Sume's chain in the previous update.
"What do you mean you aren't feeling ambitious?"
"I'm locked in your dungeon, oh fearful Ice Queen."
"Well chin up, lad, you can at least strive towards being the bestest prisoner ever!"
"#$%! that!"
"Excuse me?"
"Nothing..."
The Ice Queen angry with her Muslim prisoner's lack of drive, decides to fix the problem once and for all.
Surely no one could have expected less of a response from the Ice Queen.
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So we now leave the realm of Gudrun af Bornholm, thankful I can quit beating my head against the proverbial brick wall. In hopes of a better day, or at least a slightly softer wall.
Here are the lands we left, they actually are pretty much the exact same lands we had the last direct vassal map.
Now to take a gander at the monster we helped make more powerful in Scandinavia.
Not a whole lot to say about that, except that Sweden is definitely the main power. And Suomi may be on the menu in the near future. One thing I do like though is that Trondelag may accidentally form a Norse Norway. Why they haven't created the Kingdom title yet I don't know, but I think they meet the land requirements so that very well may happen soon...unless of course Sweden decides to gobble it up first.
The Steppes still boast of large dominant pagan realms. Perm and Rus leading the way. Volga Bulgaria at one point a mere OPM has somehow managed to recover from decades of near annihilation and is starting to rise once more.
The Hussayn Caliphate of the Shia has all but disappeared under the martial might of the Nuraddin Sunni Caliphate (whom just got spanked in a Crusade). Not much else to note, besides the fact that Persia has turned into a messy conglomerate of emirs and such that will probably be swallowed like an appetizer in 60 years when the Ilkhanate makes its appearance in the area.
Speaking of which, if and when the Horde does magically appear, things aren't looking good. In fact, I dare say there is a high likely hood we'll see the Ilkhan mow a path of destruction all the way to Munich.
This Nubia is quickly becoming something I'm enjoying to watch as well. They're Muslim though, which kind of sucks, would have been better if they were like Miaphysite or something. But regardless, Muslim Nubia is quickly turning into a power that very well may shake the rest of the Muslim world up.
There are two counties in Egypt however that are now controlled by the splintered and odd Byzantine Empire (Serb-Croats and a few Greeks). How the weakened Byzzies captured that I don't know. But if they were to take the rest of Egypt and abandon Greece altogether that would be rather fun to watch.
There's the rest of Africa. As we all know our pride and joy, the Shaiban Sultanate. They're expanding North, and East, and mopping up Songhai in the South. If they could go to the West they probably would do that as well. Under Sultan AQ the Shaibans have been unstoppable. And yes, AQ has survived this entire urn in Denmark!
Most of Western Europe. Not much has really changed besides AQ taking over his slices of Iberia. He may even go for Castille next. France and Aquitaine are still ugly messes. And as mentioned earlier independent Brittany is creating a wonderful splattering of purple across the HRE.
If the Grey Blob continues to splinter the Ilk and GH may just have a perfect pathway towards a WC.
The Isles, again not a whole lot happening. Well besides what I had mentioned an update or two ago of France taking Ireland. All of a sudden the Green and Brown and Red hues of the Isles and turned all blue. France's presence in Ireland may ensure that England never becomes an Empire, and could even spell its own doom eventually. But, we will see how that plays out, France may not even hold Ireland proper very long.
Another close up view of wonderfully beautiful Greece. That place is a mess, and I'm praying the HRE heads that direction as well.
So here are two sheets from the Ledgers, the top 10 in Religion and Army size:
In the yellow boxes are places or religions I've played as. I don't really take credit for the current Arabian Empire's strength, but its nice seeing that we've been successful. Especially with the Shaiban Sultanate.
So the only two countries in the Top 10 Armies, that I'm surprised to see are Brittany and Volga Bulgaria. Two nations I never see ranked that high, like ever, and they've been completely controlled by the AI at this point.
Now, off the bubble and right on Volga Bulgaria's haunches are:
11. Knights of Santiago
12. Syria
13. Alba
14. Byzantine Empire
And in 17th is the odd country of Galilee. Jesus would be proud.
That concludes this turn and therefore this update.
I usually tell you all where we are going next. But this time you shall have to wait in suspense. As the RNG kept wanting to send me to Ireland or Mauretania, so I overruled those four consecutive rolls and told CKII its getting a time-out for being aggravating. Apparently it wants me to either rebuild Irish Ireland or destroy the beautiful and all-powerful Shaiban.
So when I get a moment I'll re-roll and see where we go, and play enough to put up the new update of Part 8.0 - ???????