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The Second Rising of the Sixteen Pointed Star

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comagoosie said:
Every writer wishes they would have been as smart as you when it comes to preparing for an AAR's ultimate doom, a hard drive crash or corrupt savegame...
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I almost didn't do that. I figured nothing would go wrong. Luckily I am using two computers when doing this. On my main one (the one with the dead hard drive) I play the game. On the laptop I take the notes, but the laptop does not have Word so I have to use my main one to write the story itself.

By the way the hard drive has not come in yet so I am going to have to wait another day.


Also I said I would edit the last post when I did this but here it is Through Fire And Over Water
 
Sematary said:
I have some bad news, some good news, and some news that I hope will be good.

First off the bad news is I had a hard drive burn out on me. It was the hard drive on my main computer and the one I was playing Rome on.

Good news is I should be getting a new hard drive installed tomorrow night. I can't say for sure because it requires my mom going to work (she is an IT techie) and finding a spare hard drive for an engineer's computer. Then it requires me to download Rome and VV 2.1. Luckily I planned for something like this and have a copy of the save file on a flash drive. So assuming everything goes right I can play more Thursday and have an update by the weekend.
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zang! Excellent work in preperation for something that has dissembled three of my AARs! :D
 
Well, your harddrive delay gave me an opportunity to catch up with this. :D

I'm liking your story, and I'm liking Keraunos. The real Ptolemaios Keraunos wa quite a bastard, and so is yours. Glad to se that he doesn't flinch from slaughter.

A nice detail is how you do from time to time weave references to the ancient world into your narrative, like the bit about Persephone spending the winters with Hades. The off-handed way in which you do this lends depth and credibility to the setting. Very good. :)

But now I am leaning very, very far out of the window in allowing myself a minor point of criticism; I hope you don't mind. I noticed quite a number of word repetitions, like in 'You are dismissed.' Keraunos said with a dismissive wave of his hand, or with Aristarchus' fight with Midas, where you are using the word sword four times in the space of only two lines. If you watch out for those and try to use synonyms, you're writing would be even better. :)
 
The_Guiscard said:
Well, your harddrive delay gave me an opportunity to catch up with this. :D

I'm liking your story, and I'm liking Keraunos. The real Ptolemaios Keraunos wa quite a bastard, and so is yours. Glad to se that he doesn't flinch from slaughter.

A nice detail is how you do from time to time weave references to the ancient world into your narrative, like the bit about Persephone spending the winters with Hades. The off-handed way in which you do this lends depth and credibility to the setting. Very good. :)

But now I am leaning very, very far out of the window in allowing myself a minor point of criticism; I hope you don't mind. I noticed quite a number of word repetitions, like in 'You are dismissed.' Keraunos said with a dismissive wave of his hand, or with Aristarchus' fight with Midas, where you are using the word sword four times in the space of only two lines. If you watch out for those and try to use synonyms, you're writing would be even better. :)
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Well I am glad you were able to catch up. I am very glad you like it, praise is always good to hear but it holds a special place when a person who is perhaps the best CK writer currently says it.

As for Keraunos, I am not sure I would go so far as to say he is a bastard so much as a man who has his goals and doesn't care what he has to do to get there. The town was destroyed mainly because they needed supplies and as everyone knows if you are a barbarian you are not quite human and are not intitled to the same rights.

For the bits about Persephone and Apollo to name the clear ones, I try to portray them similar to what they would really think and not a watered down modern look at them would think. I am very glad you called it off handed because it means my goal is met. To them mentioning Persephone going to live with her husband as summer started or thinking Apollo is being cruel that day because of the heat would be natural and off handed.

Your criticism is noted and something I agree with. It is my biggest problem in writing. I try to keep my writing very spartan because I have found it comes natural to me and many people praise it for being able to clearly picture what I am talking about when I do that. The problem with that is it often leads me to be repetitive in my word choice.
 
Update on the hard drive status. I have the hard drive but since it is an engineer's hard drive from the local county government I can't log onto any account with full administrative permissions. Only solution is to wipe the drive and reinstall windows. Here we come to problems. 1 My mother and myself hate Vista with a passion and refuse to own a copy of it let alone have a computer that runs it. 2 The only copy of XP that we have is the 2002 version and it doesn't reconize SATA hard drives. 3 The computer I am using is running on a SATA hard drive. 4 The soonest I can get a copy of XP that will be able to reconize a SATA drive is Monday evening Pacific Standard Time. If I can get it Monday and all goes well I will have an update up by Tuesday or Thursday.
 
I want to thank all of my readers for their utmost patience. I just got Rome working on this computer after a bunch of unknown problems somehow worked themselves out. This means this AAR is officially off break status and there will be an update by Wednesday morning at the latest.
 
Sematary said:
I want to thank all of my readers for their utmost patience. I just got Rome working on this computer after a bunch of unknown problems somehow worked themselves out. This means this AAR is officially off break status and there will be an update by Wednesday morning at the latest.
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Excellent, sir! We'll be awaiting! :D
 
Sematary said:
I am very sad to announce that this AAR is dead. The save game on my flash drive some how ended up corrupted. I will update my VV now and will start on a new Rome AAR later today probably.
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*stands up, kicks nearby chair, and curses*

*reads rest of sentence*

*resets kicked down chair and apologizes to it*

:)
 
Sematary said:
I am very sad to announce that this AAR is dead. The save game on my flash drive some how ended up corrupted. I will update my VV now and will start on a new Rome AAR later today probably.
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I agree with what comagoosie said... :D
 
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