Enewald Enewald Enewald
- Oct 17, 2007
The realm rejoices as Paradox Interactive announces the launch of Crusader Kings III, the latest entry in the publisher’s grand strategy role-playing game franchise. Advisors may now jockey for positions of influence and adversaries should save their schemes for another day, because on this day Crusader Kings III can be purchased on Steam, the Paradox Store, and other major online retailers.
Just to clarify a few things:Yes, the name seems rather apt.
I had not originally realized that it was Marissa and her nameless companion who fooled the guard and busted out of the prison. Then again, since you didn't originally mention names, and what with all the narrative and chronological jumping around, it's not that hard to miss that point.
Found Navassa Island on Wikipedia. Hmm, guano... Wasn't Doctor No's hideout built on a small guano island somewhere?
I was going to wonder how Marissa ended up from Western Africa on a small, uninhabited island off the coast of Haita, but that concern was slightly superseded by the magical tricks employed by Lady Charlotte. If one of the characters can alter reality and raise (and magically float - and sail) ancient sunken ships, a simple transposion from Africa to a Carribean island is really nothing to bat an eye at.
Poor, dumb Anton decides to subvert his characterisation and the storyline for his own immortal glory?“Wait-Oh god, not the humongous mechas again?” the second-in-command said with a groan. “We already tried that, and they were completely impractical.”
The punishment for failure is... "Naughty boy gets spanky bottom!"?!? There's an almost-discussion on the utility of decorative lava pits in evil lairs? Faceless drones question their evil overlord - and get away with it?!?Poor, dumb Anton decides to subvert his characterisation and the storyline for his own immortal glory?
I'd call it breaking the fourth wall, if that was even remotely appropriate. This is more like obliterating the fourth wall. And the other three walls. And the roof. And the basement. And a couple of adjacent city blocks. By means of a MOAB.
It's very entertaining destruction, though.
My, this is on the verge of... well, a verge! :rofl: Great work, sir!
The unnamed - unknown - organplayer seems to change gender within the post...-sat hunched in front of the ethereal organ, her hands perfectly still, resting an inch above the keys. A man in a smart blue uniform entered the organ room, and saluted.
“Madame? You called for me?”
“Stop, I have no time for your pathetic whimpering.” An awful smile creased across his skeletal face. “Yes, I'm back.”
I love the description of the 'organ through space' at the beginning, it really set the scene well...
I don't know what to make of this update (yet), so I'll just concentrate on the few things I can comment on. First off, now that I have directly quoted from your post (not sequentially in this post, but chronologically speaking, what follows later was written first) and can see the actual innards, I'm very impressed with the amount of effort you clearly put into the presentation of the text (resizing the font, changing the fonts, indenting text, etc. etc.).
Second, I've noticed this before, but haven't commented on it before: you interweave the different narratives very nicely, so that when the narrative changes from one to another, the sentences seem to bleed into each other: although one action stops and the other continues, it reads as though they are one and the same. At least for the first few words. I don't know how much time it takes you to produce the effect, but it's a very nice effect.
Finally, I'll point the following out. Either it's a typo on your part, or it's intended and I'll never get a satisfactory explanation for it.
The unnamed - unknown - organplayer seems to change gender within the post...
Yes, it's all very odd.A odd joke. A odd organisation. Nice nice.
Actually that particular sentence was a joke.Feminism, eww.
Narrator haranguing a fictional narrator who is a creation of the narrator?
Sweet mercy! Are you still in university or something?!? Either you know very well what you're talking about (which is to be respected. Scary, but also to be respected), or you are insanely good at making this stuff up. Either way, respect for the skills on display.
As for myself, having graduated a number of years ago and entered the drone world of regular employment (until recently, at least - but that's another story), I am feeling like Danny Glover's character in the Lethal Weapon series (Sergeant Murtaugh?) when he uttered the famous words: "I'm getting too old for this shit." I used to be able to run with this kind of thing, but now... Ah, the mind is willing, just no longer able... Woe is me, middle age must be upon me. Waily, waily (etc. etc.).
My head hurts. I might have to go and get a Paracetamol.
Very good stuff, I like your deep knowledge of what your writing, because you display it well...