The gray blob is growing nicely, although all that unauthorized gray elsewhere is pretty troubling. Time for more of the marry and ruin tactic, I think. 
The Incorrupt Hand: a Comedy of Árpáds
- Thread starter Farquharson
- Start date
-
We have updated our Community Code of Conduct. Please read through the new rules for the forum that are an integral part of Paradox Interactive’s User Agreement.
Excellent, yes marry someone and then take all their families possesions, yes I like this idea. Where do I sign up??
Keep up the good work Farq!
Keep up the good work Farq!
Well I'm very glad to come back and NOT find my AAR with three pages of OT ramblings appended... BTW this is not an update, just a reply to replies.
Grundius: As far as I can tell, BB in CK dissipates with piety, that is, if your ruler is extremely pious everyone overlooks his megalomaniac excesses really quickly - just like in real life, right? So that's why it's important to keep your piety at least in the positive. As for exporting to EU2 it seems to me that by the end of a game of CK you probably own so much territory that any game of EU2 is far too easy. It's far more fun to play as Mombasa or something...
Fiftypence: Grabbing "King of Poland" would cost 5000+ prestige so maybe I'll settle for a Polish duchy or two to start with - or the blue in Greece, which, as far as I remember, is some sad state that's broken away from the Byzantine Empire and obviously needs an Arpad to get them sorted out.
bluelotus: Sorry! You picked a bummer of a time to return to the story - just when I was leaving for two weeks... But another update should be coming soon, I hope.
stnylan: And who'd have thought that a Papal envoy would stoop to such devious methods - unless it really was the Holy Hand of St.Stephen, of course...
Vincent J: Unless the Prince of Smolensk's mother is already dead, of course. Where did this all begin anyway? :wacko:
Dead William: So what's the deal with the latest beta? Low intrigue gives a penalty on how large a personal domain you can rule? I'll stay away from that for the moment I think. And I promise a dialogue featuring the lovely Jarka Przemysl in the next update.
coz1: As jwolf said, Constanza's child (actually a daughter, Leonor - did I say son?) was no bastard - inbred, yes, but definitely born in wedlock - she just came out in a slightly different wedlock to the one she expected, I suppose...
jwolf: The answer is, yes, Constanza's daughter Leonor remained in Gyorgy's court - of course she's still pretty young, and her name is de las Asturias, not Arpad. So far all I've done is sent her to a nunnery for an ecclesiastical education. Being inbred, her stats are atrocious so I doubt if she'll figure much in the future.
Paranoid: Marry and ruin sounds good to me. Hey, why bother with the marry part, let's just ruin...
BBBD: Well, it's pretty easy, really. All you need is a total lack of conscience. I wondered if I would lose a lot more piety or prestige by going to war against my newly acquired brother-in-law, but as far as I can see the EU2 royal marriage penalty doesn't seem to exist in CK - someone correct me if I'm wrong.
And now I have to catch up on some other stories, plus get back to playing and writing about Grey Eminence Gyorgy and his Big Grey Blob...
BTW this is not an update, just a reply to replies.Grundius: As far as I can tell, BB in CK dissipates with piety, that is, if your ruler is extremely pious everyone overlooks his megalomaniac excesses really quickly - just like in real life, right?
So that's why it's important to keep your piety at least in the positive. As for exporting to EU2 it seems to me that by the end of a game of CK you probably own so much territory that any game of EU2 is far too easy. It's far more fun to play as Mombasa or something...Fiftypence: Grabbing "King of Poland" would cost 5000+ prestige
so maybe I'll settle for a Polish duchy or two to start with - or the blue in Greece, which, as far as I remember, is some sad state that's broken away from the Byzantine Empire and obviously needs an Arpad to get them sorted out.bluelotus: Sorry! You picked a bummer of a time to return to the story - just when I was leaving for two weeks... But another update should be coming soon, I hope.
stnylan: And who'd have thought that a Papal envoy would stoop to such devious methods - unless it really was the Holy Hand of St.Stephen, of course...
Vincent J: Unless the Prince of Smolensk's mother is already dead, of course. Where did this all begin anyway? :wacko:
Dead William: So what's the deal with the latest beta? Low intrigue gives a penalty on how large a personal domain you can rule? I'll stay away from that for the moment I think. And I promise a dialogue featuring the lovely Jarka Przemysl in the next update.
coz1: As jwolf said, Constanza's child (actually a daughter, Leonor - did I say son?) was no bastard - inbred, yes, but definitely born in wedlock - she just came out in a slightly different wedlock to the one she expected, I suppose...
jwolf: The answer is, yes, Constanza's daughter Leonor remained in Gyorgy's court - of course she's still pretty young, and her name is de las Asturias, not Arpad. So far all I've done is sent her to a nunnery for an ecclesiastical education. Being inbred, her stats are atrocious so I doubt if she'll figure much in the future.
Paranoid: Marry and ruin sounds good to me. Hey, why bother with the marry part, let's just ruin...
BBBD: Well, it's pretty easy, really. All you need is a total lack of conscience.
I wondered if I would lose a lot more piety or prestige by going to war against my newly acquired brother-in-law, but as far as I can see the EU2 royal marriage penalty doesn't seem to exist in CK - someone correct me if I'm wrong.And now I have to catch up on some other stories, plus get back to playing and writing about Grey Eminence Gyorgy and his Big Grey Blob...
Well, Farq, I just bought CK myself (and have, sorry to say, completely displaced the Arpáds as rulers of Hungary with my own Babenberg dynasty) and it's indeed clear that BB is not so much of a problem in CK as it is in EU2. The only real problem is that I accepted the "crusader" trait. Oops.
Grtz
Bart
Grtz
Bart
Grundius said:
Depending on the game situation, the crusader trait can be a blessing. It gives you an enormous prestige and pity bonus when you conquer the target of a crusade and lesser bonusses for non-target infidel provinces. I just love being a crusader, yessirree!!
Edit: sorry for he off -topic...
Last edited:
Yay! Farq is back!!
Hmmm. Farq is back... I may have to start running... :rofl:
As far as I know there is no penalty for breaking a royal marriage in CK. Not really in history either. (Leans back from the shouting that will surely erupt)
Really Vincent Julien! Only kill people when you have to! You might have need of them later.....
Hmmm. Farq is back... I may have to start running... :rofl:
As far as I know there is no penalty for breaking a royal marriage in CK. Not really in history either. (Leans back from the shouting that will surely erupt)
Really Vincent Julien! Only kill people when you have to! You might have need of them later.....
Dead William said:
How do I know what the target of a crusade is? I just got the message if I wanted to crusade!
Hover your arrow over the banner in the upper right corner. It will tell you the crusade target.
Farquharson: Very nice story, although I am getting impatient for updates. I haven't been posting much, but I have been keeping myself up to date on this AAR.
Farquharson: Very nice story, although I am getting impatient for updates.
I haven't been posting much, but I have been keeping myself up to date on this AAR.
Grundius: Unless you are playing 1.04a, in which case the limited crusade has not been introduced. Crusades then are a lot less fun...
Sorry for the off-topic again...
Sorry for the off-topic again...
just finished reading the lot. Another masterpiece in the making. Hope to see an update soon. GO Àrpads, GO!
J. Passepartout said:
Thanx. I'm playing the latest Beta, don't know if that makes a difference.
Without turning this into a FAQ thread, I have one more question:
If I were to attack the target of a crusade, would the -10 Piety/month penalty be lifted?
Well then, that was certainly a nice way to gain some more territory for the Arpads! Can't wait to see which way the BGB moves next.... gee, it's kinda nice to be saying BGB instead of BWB for a change, eh?
Grundius: Glad to see you've been "converted" to CK! What you do with your Babenbergs is your own business, I suppose - unless you decide to write it up as an AAR, in which case I'll certainly be reading.
Dead William: Not so off-topic as all that. Recall that György himself recently refused the Crusader trait - mainly because I couldn't face the prospect of having the piety penalty multiplied by five! I'm afraid my Hungarian rulers have done very little in the way of crusading.
Vincent J: Well I've taken the wimpish route anyway and changed all the gray countries to something else. Take that, Smolensk! A screenshot of the new look Europe is coming soon.
J.Passepartout: Thanks for posting! An update is coming right up. BTW I'm not playing the latest beta so I don't have crusade targets unfortunately. There has just been one lo-o-o-ong crusade and I wish it would end. Does anyone know if my crusade penalty is going up because of time passing or because of my realm getting bigger? It's now about -6 per month.
Deus: Thanks - update coming.
Grundius: Since no-one more knowledgable seems to have answered your question, I think conquering the crusade target, and neighbouring regions, increases the probability of the crusade ending - which presumably then stops the leaking piety.
Draco: Which way next is a good question. For really interesting directions (like conquering Poland) I need LOTS of prestige. Maybe I'll need to start crusading after all...
Right, sorry for the wait everyone - here's Chapter 16...
What you do with your Babenbergs is your own business, I suppose - unless you decide to write it up as an AAR, in which case I'll certainly be reading. Dead William: Not so off-topic as all that. Recall that György himself recently refused the Crusader trait - mainly because I couldn't face the prospect of having the piety penalty multiplied by five! I'm afraid my Hungarian rulers have done very little in the way of crusading.
Vincent J: Well I've taken the wimpish route anyway and changed all the gray countries to something else. Take that, Smolensk!
A screenshot of the new look Europe is coming soon.J.Passepartout: Thanks for posting! An update is coming right up. BTW I'm not playing the latest beta so I don't have crusade targets unfortunately. There has just been one lo-o-o-ong crusade and I wish it would end. Does anyone know if my crusade penalty is going up because of time passing or because of my realm getting bigger? It's now about -6 per month.
Deus: Thanks - update coming.
Grundius: Since no-one more knowledgable seems to have answered your question, I think conquering the crusade target, and neighbouring regions, increases the probability of the crusade ending - which presumably then stops the leaking piety.
Draco: Which way next is a good question. For really interesting directions (like conquering Poland) I need LOTS of prestige. Maybe I'll need to start crusading after all...
Right, sorry for the wait everyone - here's Chapter 16...
Chapter Sixteen: 1213-22
György Gives Himself Heirs
György Gives Himself Heirs
The year was 1214 and King György of Hungary was spending a little family time with Queen Jarka and their two-year-old son Fülöp. Queen Jarka was now expecting another child.
Queen Jarka Przemysl, György’s third wife
Queen Jarka: Oooh, isn’t he a little cutikins! Who’s a little cutikins, then?
King György: He’s a fine lad, no doubt about it.
Queen Jarka: And I’m sure he’ll make a great king of Hungary someday!
King György: Ahem, yes, well he’s not actually first in line, you know.
Queen Jarka: Hmm. Yes. That little runt Ábel, you mean, dear?
King György: There’s nothing wrong with little Ábel... Well, nothing much anyway.
Queen Jarka: He’s half Spanish.
King György: Well, some Spanish people are quite nice...
Queen Jarka: Name one.
King György: Err... El Cid?
Queen Jarka, snorting: You think your son is going to turn out like El Cid?
Would young Ábel grow up to marry Sophia Loren?
King György: Well, you never know.
Queen Jarka: Well I know, and he isn’t. That pathetic little specimen probably won’t even make it to his tenth birthday, and a good thing too, that’s what I say!
King György: Really, dear! What a thing to say!
Queen Jarka: So, where is he now, anyway?
King György: Errm... the usual place...
Queen Jarka: Left in the coal cupboard again, right?
King György: It’s quite warm there... in summer...
Queen Jarka: Whereas now that winter is approaching - you’d better be careful, dear, he might catch his death of cold! Heh, heh! Ms Loren won’t want to marry anyone who has a habit of coughing up blood, I shouldn’t think...
King György: Anyway, I was meaning to ask you about the state of the royal coffers.
Queen Jarka: Really dear, not another war, is it?
King György: Just a little... tidying up, shall we say. That imbecile Count Klim of Beresty still won’t agree to be my vassal - despite my being King of Lithuania and all that. The impertinence of it!
Queen Jarka: Well, if you must, dear. Boys will be boys, I suppose... * to Fülöp * Yes, my little cutikins, you too! You’ll be all grown up and crushing your little enemikins underfoot before you know it...
Fülöp: Cwush ennikins foot! Gurgle, gurgle... * Fills nappy *
Lithuania in 1214
Yatvyagi (blue), Beresty (lavender), Pinsk (dark blue) and Polotsk (irritatingly dark gray) remain outwith Hungarian rule
Needless to say, a few months, and a brutal, unprovoked invasion later, Count Klim had changed his tune slightly and quickly yielded his title and treasury to King György. Yatvyagi was unfortunately part of the rather large and sprawling Kingdom of Georgia, while Pinsk was still inextricably entangled in the webs of the Qarakhnids.
Shortly after the opening of hostilities, Queen Jarka had given birth to her second son, who was named Smil. Nobody could remember any time that a King of Hungary had had as many as three sons to succeed him - it was a time of great rejoicing, and of many dirty nappies, of course.
As usual, King György was having difficulties with his piety, as all pet-killers usually do. Accordingly, in 1216 he assembled another army in the Baltic region and set out to eradicate the last few remaining pagans from the frozen wastes of the north. The war went well, but unfortunately this was a bad year for Przemysls. First György’s mother, Katarzyna Przemysl, then his wife Jarka Przemysl, both died. It was time to find yet another wife.
Thus György took a couple of weeks off campaigning to pay a visit to Duke Janislaw Piast of Mazovia to see if he could marry the Duke’s cousin, Helena z Czarnkowa. Naturally Duke Janislaw was delighted with the proposal, especially since young Helena suffered from intense depression and was driving the rest of the Mazovian court half mad with her incessant threats of suicide. King György took his new bride with him on campaign, thinking that a tour of some god-forsaken tundra and the sight of a bunch of defenceless pagan tribesmen being mercilessly hunted down in the name of Christian charity would be just the thing to lift her flagging spirits. For some reason, it didn’t, but on the other hand she was soon expecting her first child so the trip was not entirely fruitless.
A cheery expanse of Arctic tundra freshly cleared of annoying pagans
Indeed the arrival of two new sons to the Royal Family was about all of consequence that happened for the next few years. Little Móric was born in 1217 and his brother Ádárn came along in 1219. Meanwhile the Kingdom of Hungary continued to grow, assimilating sundry parts of Sweden, Finland and Iceland at the expense of the pagan tribes. The only trouble was that King György was running out of pagans to conquer and his piety was still distinctly on the low side.
Poor neglected little Ábel continued to spend most of his time in the coal cupboard, undergoing what was euphemistically termed a “court education”, and in 1216, to the the great alarm of no-one in particular, he became ill. A doctor was summoned but when he arrived nobody could remember why he had been called so he was sent away again. Mystified, the doctor left, throwing a puzzled look back at the sound of muffled coughing from behind a cupboard door.
Little Abel gets a Court Education
By 1219 young Fülöp had also fallen ill, for which most people blamed Ábel, who, it was supposed, had carelessly passed on his illness to his half-brother. At least Fülöp was being looked after by the best doctors that money could buy. In 1220 Fülöp began to take an interest in religion. Frightened that he might end up like his half-brother Ábel who had, in the confines of his cupboard, somehow managed to become honest, just and trusting, King György instructed his second son to spend more time with courtiers. Needless to say, under the influence of the sort of people who hung about the Hungarian court, Fülöp had soon learned to lie and cheat to his heart’s content and had forgotten about religion entirely.
In 1221 it was time to snatch another slice of Germany since the King of Germany seemed particularly inept at keeping his realm intact. The Duke of Bavaria, who had been independent for some time, was King György’s next victim and soon the counties of Salzburg and Niederbayern had been added to the growing Grey Blob. It was at this point that King György, making a routine survey of his lands, noticed that Pinsk was no longer ruled by the Qarakhnids. In fact, Sheik Kerameddin Omar of Pinsk was now at war with King Amr of Qarakhnid having become “Disloyalty Incarnate” when King Amr had succeeded his father as Spider King in 1220. Since the Qarakhnids didn’t seem to be doing anything about this, King György decided to intervene himself. By February 1222 Pinsk had been liberated and brought into the Hungarian fold.
Three months earlier tragedy had struck the Árpád family when trusting little Ábel had failed to emerge from the coal cupboard for his fortnightly walk in the open air. In fact he was dead, although how this had happened nobody seemed to know. The main thing was that ten-year-old Fülöp was now first in line to the throne of Hungary. The strangest thing was that the Pope insisted on canonizing young Ábel, claiming that his death had been a “martyrdom”.
Later in 1222 another spot of Lithuanian “tidying up” was undertaken, when the jackbooted diplomats of the Hungarian Army marched into Polotsk and gently explained to the Prince of Samogitia that his presence was no longer required, indeed no longer really wanted. This left Yatvyagi as the only Lithuanian province not under Hungarian control.
Lands ruled by King György in 1222 - I have edited the data file and everything grey is now Hungarian
Notice Poland (green), annoyingly stuck in the middle
The two large blue patches to the east are the Kingdom of Georgia
Hungary also owns two provinces in Flanders, Northampton, and the western half of Iceland
Last edited:
Ah, what a lovely conversation! On feels intensely sorry for poor Abel, but as long as it is for the good of the Arpáds, I suppose the suffering of one small boy should be of little consequence.... Was there a dynastic reason to marry the depressed cousin of the Polish king, or did you marry her for her great stats and suicidal chatter? Lovely bare tundra's ought to have cheered her enormously, really, I just don't understand women! And you forgot the continuing presence of large, sweating, grunting, farting and burping Hungarian soldiers! I mean, how could a woman not be cheered by such marvelous sights? Lovely update, thanks!
Was there a dynastic reason to marry the depressed cousin of the Polish king, or did you marry her for her great stats and suicidal chatter? Lovely bare tundra's ought to have cheered her enormously, really, I just don't understand women! And you forgot the continuing presence of large, sweating, grunting, farting and burping Hungarian soldiers! I mean, how could a woman not be cheered by such marvelous sights? Lovely update, thanks!
Off Topic: Crusades
Well, I regret to inform you your piety penalty will rise and rise as you get more titles and more land. It doesn't in my opinion, drop significantly if you go on a crusade even. Which is why I play the beta, at least the crusades end when the target is conquered. With the patches they stop once the target and surrounding provinces have been conquered, though with the latest patches the Infidels do their darndest to conquer them back.
And off course the Arpáds with their lousy Intrigue would be severely diminished in personal domain.
Not sorry for the off topic....
Well, I regret to inform you your piety penalty will rise and rise as you get more titles and more land. It doesn't in my opinion, drop significantly if you go on a crusade even. Which is why I play the beta, at least the crusades end when the target is conquered. With the patches they stop once the target and surrounding provinces have been conquered, though with the latest patches the Infidels do their darndest to conquer them back.
And off course the Arpáds with their lousy Intrigue would be severely diminished in personal domain.
Not sorry for the off topic....
Provinces in Norway? The Pagans took those from the Kingdom of Norway? Anyway, the Arpads are such a caring family!
Remember that the current Arpads are descended from Kalman, so Abel's fate isn't too surprising. Great update, as usual