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Tsäptör...Chapter I: Identity Crisis
What are we? Where do we come? Well, duh, from the Victoria Improvement Project, it seems... What we are... Well, I'll get to it a bit later.
When I first started playing VIP the Piratini Republic caugth my attention, along the african nation with wannabe-UK flag. I just had to play this mysterious nation. So after getting spanked as Texas and Germany, I hop to the controls of the Piratini Republic.
Non-VIPpers must be horribly confused by now, so I will actualy show you what I am talking about:
So, basicaly, we are a commie-red coloured, pisspoor, illiterate nation that is located in south america and we have the coolest flag ever. In addition, we have soldiers with white shirts and brown pants.
But wait a minute... We are at war with the EEVOL Empire of Brazil! Boy, we are going to have a lot of fun today...
Because I am a noob who has never heard of the Piratini Republic before playing VIP I'll have to take a look around:
Despite beign commie-red we are EEVOL Capitalistic PigDogs ourselves. Hmmm...
Our glorious army is composed of one infantry division and a cavalry division with some cool attachment. Yay!
And we can afford to get a general too! YAYAYAYAYAY!
He's the man, isn't he!?
What will the Piratinis do? Will Bento "Superman" Goncalves stem the Brazilian tide? Will Piratini Republic get spanked like 90% of the nations Nerfix has played?
Find it out in the next chapter of The PirAARtini Republic!
What are we? Where do we come? Well, duh, from the Victoria Improvement Project, it seems... What we are... Well, I'll get to it a bit later.
When I first started playing VIP the Piratini Republic caugth my attention, along the african nation with wannabe-UK flag. I just had to play this mysterious nation. So after getting spanked as Texas and Germany, I hop to the controls of the Piratini Republic.
Non-VIPpers must be horribly confused by now, so I will actualy show you what I am talking about:
So, basicaly, we are a commie-red coloured, pisspoor, illiterate nation that is located in south america and we have the coolest flag ever. In addition, we have soldiers with white shirts and brown pants.
But wait a minute... We are at war with the EEVOL Empire of Brazil! Boy, we are going to have a lot of fun today...
Because I am a noob who has never heard of the Piratini Republic before playing VIP I'll have to take a look around:
Despite beign commie-red we are EEVOL Capitalistic PigDogs ourselves. Hmmm...
Our glorious army is composed of one infantry division and a cavalry division with some cool attachment. Yay!
And we can afford to get a general too! YAYAYAYAYAY!
He's the man, isn't he!?
What will the Piratinis do? Will Bento "Superman" Goncalves stem the Brazilian tide? Will Piratini Republic get spanked like 90% of the nations Nerfix has played?
Find it out in the next chapter of The PirAARtini Republic!
not completely new!
only the 2nd aar on a VIP underdog!
nice use of screenies.
i guess you are the one that once marked mozart in his screenshot?
good luck and have fun with your game.
only the 2nd aar on a VIP underdog!
nice use of screenies.
i guess you are the one that once marked mozart in his screenshot?
good luck and have fun with your game.
Therlun: But this is the first Piratini AAR, no? I'm not the Mozart guy though...
Anyhoo:
Tsäp...Chapter II: Freedom Halleluja Perkele
Well, I finaly got the answers to the questions what we are and who we are!
We are Brazilian liberal rebels! Rocks Ok! A bit like these guys:
The Brazzies sent most of their army to chase them...
Oh yeah, we were also given an option to surrender or keep on figthing, get a new division and a new general. Those funny Brazilians... :rofl:
More Übermensch! Now a colletible card series! Sign up todays to get your starter set!
With the Brazzies running somewhere in Amazon we start the "Itsy Bitsy Hockey Offensive":
The aerial photograph was taken just few days before we deployed our new cavalry division.
Too bad our ecenomy is going to hell as most of the farmers are now riding warhorses and screaming "Freedom Halleluja Perkele!"
Not like this kids, not like this...
Some Italian dude called "Garibaldi" gave us a pile of guns and sent a mad commander bloke of his to help us. We made him the War Minister and told him to make a plan. Too bad he is just a wee bit megalomanic.
Meanwhile the Brazzies are getting spanked by our troops:
For some unknow reason the Brazilians were rather unwilling to figth and ran away with minium casualties. We reinforce our newest division to full strength and send them chasing the brazilians who after brief skirmishing decide that it would be smart for them to run to the Paraguan border.
Our new War Minister has finished devising tha plan: We are to capture Rio de Janeiro and therefore, hopefuly, force Brazil to peace.
We call it the "Operation Freedom Halleluja Perkele":
The origins of the warcry are unknow but it seems to boost the morale of our troops.
As we start marching towards Santos the Brazilian troops on the Paraguan border decide to make a huge mistake:
What is the fate of Piratini? Will "Operation Freedom Halleluja Perkele" succeed? Will the coward imprerialists get spanked our are the Piratini doomed?
More at Tsä...Chapter III!
Anyhoo:
Tsäp...Chapter II: Freedom Halleluja Perkele
Well, I finaly got the answers to the questions what we are and who we are!
We are Brazilian liberal rebels! Rocks Ok! A bit like these guys:
The Brazzies sent most of their army to chase them...
Oh yeah, we were also given an option to surrender or keep on figthing, get a new division and a new general. Those funny Brazilians... :rofl:
More Übermensch! Now a colletible card series! Sign up todays to get your starter set!
With the Brazzies running somewhere in Amazon we start the "Itsy Bitsy Hockey Offensive":
The aerial photograph was taken just few days before we deployed our new cavalry division.
Too bad our ecenomy is going to hell as most of the farmers are now riding warhorses and screaming "Freedom Halleluja Perkele!"
Not like this kids, not like this...
Some Italian dude called "Garibaldi" gave us a pile of guns and sent a mad commander bloke of his to help us. We made him the War Minister and told him to make a plan. Too bad he is just a wee bit megalomanic.
Meanwhile the Brazzies are getting spanked by our troops:
For some unknow reason the Brazilians were rather unwilling to figth and ran away with minium casualties. We reinforce our newest division to full strength and send them chasing the brazilians who after brief skirmishing decide that it would be smart for them to run to the Paraguan border.
Our new War Minister has finished devising tha plan: We are to capture Rio de Janeiro and therefore, hopefuly, force Brazil to peace.
We call it the "Operation Freedom Halleluja Perkele":
The origins of the warcry are unknow but it seems to boost the morale of our troops.
As we start marching towards Santos the Brazilian troops on the Paraguan border decide to make a huge mistake:
What is the fate of Piratini? Will "Operation Freedom Halleluja Perkele" succeed? Will the coward imprerialists get spanked our are the Piratini doomed?
More at Tsä...Chapter III!
I won't post Chap. III before you comment.
Kidding, Kidding.
Chapter III: A little more conversation, a little more action
President Alfonso "Boogeyman" Juano was waiting Garibaldi's letter. He only knew that the troopers had been succesfull at capturing Santos and taking a few thousand Brazilian prisoners of war. Some Brazilian rebels had joined their cause, styling themselves as the "Juliana Republic".
"Mr. President!"
Alfonso was snapped out of his thougths by the scream
"What!?"
"A letter for you!" the courier, a young boy, seemingly an ex-slave said
"Mmmmhhhh-hyy, let's see... Ah, yes!"
Alfonso dismissed the courier and read the Garibaldi's letter:
"Armies have been victorious, Rio De Janeiro has been captured along with other important targets. We have the Emperor as a hostage."
This was the best chrismas present the president could possibly get. He lit his pipe and started laughing with overly selfish voice...
Meanwhile in the front...
A picture says more than 1000 words...
And a bit earlier:
A decisive Piratini victory!
But there was also some grim news. The beloved leader and a prominent general Bento Goncalves was assinated by the imperialists. Garibaldi took his place, even if there was some distrust for the exiled Sardinia-Piedmontian general. Some villages were pillaged to remedy the lack of supplies.
So far the Piratinis have won every battle they have iniated... Brazil is turning into the laughingstock of the whole world whilst the Piratinis grow stronger and stronger... The Piratinis now have their own newspaper, their army is as strong as the army of Brazil and they have the Brazilian emperor as a prisoner...
But what will be the final fate of the Piratinian experiment?
Only Nerfix and Chapter IV will tell...
And yes, I had great time making those pics. And yes, the president is, AFAIK, completely imaginary person...
BTW, I have nothing personal against brazilians...
Kidding, Kidding.
Chapter III: A little more conversation, a little more action
President Alfonso "Boogeyman" Juano was waiting Garibaldi's letter. He only knew that the troopers had been succesfull at capturing Santos and taking a few thousand Brazilian prisoners of war. Some Brazilian rebels had joined their cause, styling themselves as the "Juliana Republic".
"Mr. President!"
Alfonso was snapped out of his thougths by the scream
"What!?"
"A letter for you!" the courier, a young boy, seemingly an ex-slave said
"Mmmmhhhh-hyy, let's see... Ah, yes!"
Alfonso dismissed the courier and read the Garibaldi's letter:
"Armies have been victorious, Rio De Janeiro has been captured along with other important targets. We have the Emperor as a hostage."
This was the best chrismas present the president could possibly get. He lit his pipe and started laughing with overly selfish voice...
Meanwhile in the front...
A picture says more than 1000 words...
And a bit earlier:
A decisive Piratini victory!
But there was also some grim news. The beloved leader and a prominent general Bento Goncalves was assinated by the imperialists. Garibaldi took his place, even if there was some distrust for the exiled Sardinia-Piedmontian general. Some villages were pillaged to remedy the lack of supplies.
So far the Piratinis have won every battle they have iniated... Brazil is turning into the laughingstock of the whole world whilst the Piratinis grow stronger and stronger... The Piratinis now have their own newspaper, their army is as strong as the army of Brazil and they have the Brazilian emperor as a prisoner...
But what will be the final fate of the Piratinian experiment?
Only Nerfix and Chapter IV will tell...
And yes, I had great time making those pics. And yes, the president is, AFAIK, completely imaginary person...
BTW, I have nothing personal against brazilians...
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oh my god...I am still whiping away tears of laughter from that "President Boogeyman" pic :rofl: Good job, glad your war with Brazil has gone well. They got nothing against you.
That president of yours sure is an inspiring leader. Puts current world leaders to shame that one, truly he does.
Nerfix said:
Love the way that looks graphically...although it makes me imagine that image popping over Rio de Jainero going "How are you gentlemen? All your base are belong to us!"
Trogle, anynomous: ARGH! You guessed my source of inspiration!
Naah, just kidding... But I can show you what inspired me to make this thing if you want...
Chapter IV: Tanak, Tank, Tank, Tank, Tank, Na, Na, Tank, Oh, Tank, Oh, Tank, Oh; Or: Two long, hot summers
Summer -37
In the front...
The troops had advanced further almost unresisted... Cavalry was to take the province of Minas Novais and then Garibaldi and his troops would follow them to help them in the occupation. Some territories were gained near the Paraguan border but not the vital province of Miranda. Garibaldi wasn't completely happy with the situation as manpower was starting to run low.
Then...
The Brazilians made an attack. The attack failed but it was a sign that the Brazilians weren't beaten yet... Even worser, Garibaldi was commanded to end partisan activity near the Piratini Republic's orginal border...
Later, in Rio de Janeiro...
This wasn't the first time President was visting Rio de Janeiro but things had definedly changed. The imperial palace had been turned into a combined prison(for the emperor and his ministers) and hotel(for President and his ministers). The battles were taking place only few hundred miles away.
President arrived to the palace. Most of the palace had been looted but it was still the coziest house around.
"Tell me the news" President asked the War Minister who had arrived few weeks before him.
"Well, the Brazilians refused our peace offer..."
"GOD*****!" the President screamed. The ministers got upset.
"Sorry..." the President said after realizing his "slip"
"This wasn't all that unexpected... So, I have a plan..." The War Minister said
"Yes?" The President showed intrest instead of yelling at War Minister. How odd, he thought. Things are definedly diffrent than in Sardinia.
"I call it the "Operation Spiderweb". It calls for systematical destruction and disarment of the Brazailian armed forces through encirclement."
"Can we pull out that plan?" The President asked.
"The Brazilians have been extremely hesitant to attack, so I believe it is possible."
"Then what are we waiting for!?"
Pink borders showing the refused "Treaty of Santos" and green lines showing our next offensives.
Fall and Winter -37
The cavalry ner the Paraguan border advance, fougth with Brazilian infantry and took some rather heavy losses. Garibaldi returned from his little "adventure". Plan Spiderweb was started.
Summer -38
The preparation for the first phase of "Operation Spiderweb" was complete:
Soon the Brazilian army would be reduced to meager 2 divisions. However, encircling those remaining two would be extremely hard...
More partisans appeared and we had to order the troops near the Paraguan border to stop them:
As air gets a bit cooler, a new "hot phase" of the Piratini offensive begins. Even if the people's mind was calmed by a treaty we made with Uruguay and the forts erected by a private company, the president and his cabinet are uneasy as the people are getting exhausted and the Brazilians are stubborn...
But President and War Minister haven't stopped devising plans:
Magenta: Current territories we are going to ask for peace
Blue: Non-Brazilian territories rigthfully ours
Lime: Territories we may capture
Purple: Areas we migth have to occopy
Stay tuned for the Chapter V!
Naah, just kidding... But I can show you what inspired me to make this thing if you want...
Chapter IV: Tanak, Tank, Tank, Tank, Tank, Na, Na, Tank, Oh, Tank, Oh, Tank, Oh; Or: Two long, hot summers
Summer -37
In the front...
The troops had advanced further almost unresisted... Cavalry was to take the province of Minas Novais and then Garibaldi and his troops would follow them to help them in the occupation. Some territories were gained near the Paraguan border but not the vital province of Miranda. Garibaldi wasn't completely happy with the situation as manpower was starting to run low.
Then...
The Brazilians made an attack. The attack failed but it was a sign that the Brazilians weren't beaten yet... Even worser, Garibaldi was commanded to end partisan activity near the Piratini Republic's orginal border...
Later, in Rio de Janeiro...
This wasn't the first time President was visting Rio de Janeiro but things had definedly changed. The imperial palace had been turned into a combined prison(for the emperor and his ministers) and hotel(for President and his ministers). The battles were taking place only few hundred miles away.
President arrived to the palace. Most of the palace had been looted but it was still the coziest house around.
"Tell me the news" President asked the War Minister who had arrived few weeks before him.
"Well, the Brazilians refused our peace offer..."
"GOD*****!" the President screamed. The ministers got upset.
"Sorry..." the President said after realizing his "slip"
"This wasn't all that unexpected... So, I have a plan..." The War Minister said
"Yes?" The President showed intrest instead of yelling at War Minister. How odd, he thought. Things are definedly diffrent than in Sardinia.
"I call it the "Operation Spiderweb". It calls for systematical destruction and disarment of the Brazailian armed forces through encirclement."
"Can we pull out that plan?" The President asked.
"The Brazilians have been extremely hesitant to attack, so I believe it is possible."
"Then what are we waiting for!?"
Pink borders showing the refused "Treaty of Santos" and green lines showing our next offensives.
Fall and Winter -37
The cavalry ner the Paraguan border advance, fougth with Brazilian infantry and took some rather heavy losses. Garibaldi returned from his little "adventure". Plan Spiderweb was started.
Summer -38
The preparation for the first phase of "Operation Spiderweb" was complete:
Soon the Brazilian army would be reduced to meager 2 divisions. However, encircling those remaining two would be extremely hard...
More partisans appeared and we had to order the troops near the Paraguan border to stop them:
As air gets a bit cooler, a new "hot phase" of the Piratini offensive begins. Even if the people's mind was calmed by a treaty we made with Uruguay and the forts erected by a private company, the president and his cabinet are uneasy as the people are getting exhausted and the Brazilians are stubborn...
But President and War Minister haven't stopped devising plans:
Magenta: Current territories we are going to ask for peace
Blue: Non-Brazilian territories rigthfully ours
Lime: Territories we may capture
Purple: Areas we migth have to occopy
Stay tuned for the Chapter V!
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Great job against Brazil so far, let's hope you can keep it up This AAR is making me want to download VIP.
Oh yeah, just have to say you're having far too much fun with these pictures :rofl:
This AAR is making me want to download VIP.Oh yeah, just have to say you're having far too much fun with these pictures :rofl:
Wow...utterly hilarious. President Boogeyman and his sidekick Doom Walrus! :rofl: This is great!
omfg!!!!!1 d1s is t3h pwnzors AAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111
Seriously, this is bloody brilliant!
Seriously, this is bloody brilliant!
Nerfix, I think you and all your fans would get a kick out of this flash movie:
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/63227
It makes fun of bad flash movies (of which the internet proliferates) as well as internetspeak
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/63227
It makes fun of bad flash movies (of which the internet proliferates) as well as internetspeak