A week after the Austria peace deal, The Mamluks too sue for peace. A white peace. During this epic conflict which will live long in the memory of Scots everywhere, The Mamluks did...well...nothing. With no land border and a pathetic navy, no actual battles were fought. The only injury suffered by anyone on either side was my gaining a slightly sprained finger from tapping the mouse too often.
On the 16th January 1479 Savoy is annexed. Savoy, Dauphine and France had been left alive for sometime so as to keep the land border with Burgundy as narrow as possible. Now that both Scotland and Burgundy are locked in war things shall change.
Scots make use of the newly acquired Piedmont to launch their favourite type of attack on Burgundy...one from the rear.
On the 20th January 1479 Scotland finally gets around to completing her reconquest of Barcelona...at the 20th attempt. Aragon is annexed.
The primary reason that Scotland had not suffered more at the hands of Burgundy's attack is that the great bulk of Burgundy's army is actually overseas...in Greece. So Burgundy decided to launch a surprise attack on Scotland without the majority of her forces, despite their being no reason for her not to bring these men back before beginning her war. That is an act truly worthy of a Scot.
[Another act truly worthy of a Scot is thinking you have taken a screenshot when you actually have not. Sorry, I thought I had taken a screenshot of Burgundy's large army stacks in her Greek holdings of Morea (which Burgundy gained during one of her pointless wars as Defender of the Faith), but alas I cannot find the damned file! So you will just have to trust me on this. Yes, thats right, trust the person who has been proving himself a conniving git all game.]
The logic cannot be faulted on the part of the fortunate Burgundian soldiers stationed in Greece however. Attack the rain infested lands of madmen, or top up your sun tan? Tough choice.
In September 1479 Salzburg declares war on Scotland, dragging her lucky ally The Palatinate into the conflict as well. These two can muster 5,000 men. Perfect applicants once again.
Burgundy is collapsing with German minors able to occupy a number of provinces, she is forced into a very damaging peace deal.
Massive swathes of Burgundy are thus released as minor nations. The vicious predator in every Scot crows in delight. More small fries to bully.
March 1480 witnesses The Palatinate ceding Pfalz and a wad of cash to get the ravening Scots off her remaining land, bringing Palatinate to OPM status. Scotland thanks Salzburg.
Peace once more returns to Scotland (well we're still at war with Salzburg). Finally her inhabitants can return to ruining their newly acquired empire, infighting, inbreeding and drinking themselves to an early death.
The King uses this lull to solve a problem which has been vexing Him for some time. Namely the constant abuse of His Majesty.
No longer shall lies about the King's corruptness, drunkness, wastefulness, debauchery, foolishness and backwardness be told! No, truth shall reign supreme. The recent allegations have been unfair. The King has been far more corrupt, drunk, wasteful, debauching, foolish and backward than had previously been reported - this shall be set right!
The Pope takes leave of his senses and forgets about Scotland having annexed his traditional home, constantly warred with Catholics for years on end and the fact that he only recently excommunicated Scotland...
One can only imagine the now accurate reporting of how shockingly inept the Scottish King is, has made the Pope feel mercy for the people of Scotland and thus brought about this decision.
Therefore Scotland is now at peace (nearly) having smashed most of her rivals and has just been given the accolade of Papal Controller. People of Scotland know how this goes. Something is about to go wrong...
Damnation.
Despite having considerably larger forces, the situation is a bit worrying for Scotland. The bulk of our armies are still in Burgundy, with no direct land route to our Austrian holdings, Scottish forces need to make a long march around through southern France and northern Italy in order to reach the theatre. Thankfully there are still 40,000 or so stilll in this new theatre however. Considering the fact that the average Scottish soldier can only manage a moderately quick waddle, as opposed to a march, it will fall upon these brave 40,000 to defend Scotland for quite some time.
More worrying however is the simple fact that after years of non-stop war the people of Scotland's empire are close to mass riots. Frankly most Scots are surprised it has taken this long for the newly conquered people to realise how useless Scots are in rule (Gordon Brown for example...). Stability is a long way off recovery. War exhaustion is ever growing. Scotland could truly do with a period of rest.
With that in mind...
Oh joy. The Pope has gone to war against the Papal Controller...Scots return to drinking, the situation is too confusing for logic to have any chance.
Some more minor nations join the Alliance to Conquer the Evil Scottish Gits.
Andrea Law participates in one of Scotland's most successful battles. The fact that Scotland actually lost the battle is a moot point. Bohemia have suffered massive casualties.
Has Scotland found its new David Livingston?
Law: 'Well yes, I hope I can eclipse the brilliant Livingston. We fought a defensive battle, hoping to buy time for our onrushing (read as; waddling quite quickly) reinforcements. It is a pity the battle was lost, but the casualties should make Bohemia wary.'
Evidently Scotland has not found the new Livingston, Law is far too coherent and intelligent. He is quickly given a desk job. Leave the fighting to imbeciles, thank you.
Beathan Ruthven is found slobbering on a bench outside. He is instantly given command.
The lesson: Imbecility wins wars. The fact that Ruthven had overwhelming numbers was clearly of no consequance.
The King views a fleeing army and quickly gets stuck in, here is a chance for glory!
Imbecility gains Scotland another victory.
Bohemia's army is utterly shattered. Her forces are being harried to destruction.
On the 14th November 1481 Switzerland is annexed.
For some reason having the Pope go to war with you seems to bring about...
Honestly, you'd have thought he'd give Scotland more warning. ah well from Papal Controller to excommunicated. One benefit of being excommunicated is that when countries declare war on Scotland it is on the basis of excommunication. The alternative, with such high infamy, is on the grounds of 'dishonourable scum'. An apt definition of Scotland, but so very hurtful.
Despite having shattered Bohemia's forces, the war exhaustion has risen to massive heights due to Scottish forces chasing Bohemia for so long within their territory. Revolts have become widespread. Bohemia has also been able to easily begin rebuilding her army due to the massive size of her lands.
Taking the cowards approach to warfare, Scotland peace out.
The peace deal is very unsatisfactory. However the Scottish army had spent such a long time in Bohemian land, without reinforcement that it had dropped to a size of 13,000 from a possible size of 45,000. Scotland need some time of peace, in order to despoil her new lands, grow larger bellies and recoup for further conquests.
Despite the revolts, the Portuguese seem to have accepted their fate. Joint losers with the rest of Scotland.
On the 6th July 1482 Salzburg is finally annexed.
On the 27th August 1482 Ansbach is annexed.
Ocober 1482 witnesses the Papal States ceding Bamberg to Scotland, recuding the Papacy to OPM status. You really have to wonder why they excommunicated the peaceful Scotland in the first place.
In the same month Liege desides to delcare war on Scotland! With all of 3,000 men...
The band of losers swells.
On the 21rst November 1482 Mainz is annexed.
Much talk has been made of Scotland needing time out to allow revolts to die down.
It was all lies. Its war-diddly-ino (sorry, couldn't help myself...) with Flanders!