Freaking Hawt!
Barf: That’s cause this episode is just a Timeleecher.
Harold: What? What is what? This AAR is a what?
Barf: You know, an episode that’s leeching time until Grubby comes up with a Grand Plot Twist (GPT) again… Or can be bothered to play that old V1.3 game again.
Harold:…
Barf: Besides, if you put ‘time’ into something it becomes über awesome instantly!
Harold: Really?
Barf: Yes! You see, ‘Timelines’, ‘Timepiece’, ‘The New York Times’, ‘Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time’, ‘Illusion of Time’ (That’s Illusion of Gaia for the Yanks. Yes, another SNES RPG) ‘Lord of the Time Rings’ etc.
Harold: I thought it was just ‘The Lord of the Rings’?
Barf: Yes. My point exactly!
Harold:… But there is no ‘time’ in that…
Barf: Imagine how awesome it would be when there was!
Harold: Pretty damned awesome. But if this episode is called ‘freaking hawt’, what is freaking hawt? Cause it’s certainly not you.
Barf: … No… I’m macho, super macho. And a Viking*, but not freaking hawt.
Harold: Then what is?
Grubnessul: This is!
Narrator: Meanwhile back in the mines of Morea…
The hot water slowly made it’s way down over the female curves of her freaking hawt body. She breathed the steamy hot air as her hands gently rubbed the milky white soap over her cream white, sweaty well formed….
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: WHAT THE F*UCK ARE DOING? DON’T THOUCH THE HOT WATER!!!!111
Random Elfish Friend (REF): Ardberg, what are you doing?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Being wet, steamy and soapy!
REF: Why? That silly date of yours?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Aye!
REF: I thought you stopped playing that silly game a long time ago?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Hey, it provides a good living!
REF: It’s a silly game!
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: You know of any other game that collects such bad story, game play and 11 million horny geeks to stare at these cream white, silky soft…
Animal planet presenter: Hooters. Hooters, or owls, are birds of prey that favour to hunt at night.
REF: So… what’ll you wear?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Dunno yet… I was thinking of the Heavy Hauberk of Hawtness…
REF: And beneath that?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: The Short Skirt of Stainless Steal?
REF: Hmm I’d take the Purple Panzer of Pure Pwnage in that case…
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: That thing? Wouldn’t go by my hovering horned horny helmet…
REF: Take the Cackling Crown of Candy…
Narrator: And that is the proof why all the fantasy female warriors in scantly, chain mail bikini armour would never work in reality.
Meanwhile in Burgundy:
Burgundian king: Muhahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha!
Burgundian servant: What is it, my Burgudian lord?
Burgundian king: We have them now!
Servant: Who?
King: The Viking brothers!
Servant: Who?
King: Olav O’Reily and Knud Y’Reily!
Servant: I don’t think they’ve ever been mentioned before in this AAR, sire.
King: So?
Servant: What do we want with them anyway?
King: They’ll serve as bait…
Servant: Bait for who? Harold and pals?
King: Harold? Why would I want to lure him?
Servant: To take revenge?
King: …
Servant: No?
King: …
Servant: Than who do you want to lure?
King: …. No idea… Somebody!
Harold: This is getting silly…
Barf: Yes!
Harold: So will the next update also be a Timeleecher?
Barf: I fear so… Grubby isn’t exactly working hard on this AAR…
Harold: So we go through all this nonsense just because Grubby fails to update more often?
Barf: Yes…
Next: Timeleechers: What if Grubby didn’t fail to update more often?
* And yes, Vikings are super macho, and as we all know by now a Viking is a huge savage dude, about 2 meter high, 1.5 meter wide in the shoulders, weighing about 120 kg (pure muscles ofcourse, no gram of fat), running 80 km/h per hour, with masses of sharp pointed axes and nasty long razor-sharp daggers that can rip your belly open before you can say 'Hey look, Yohan Andersson made another EU3 expansion pack that I have to buy for 20 Euros while those Americans only have to pay 20 Dollar for it.’ And thus super macho.
Barf: That’s cause this episode is just a Timeleecher.
Harold: What? What is what? This AAR is a what?
Barf: You know, an episode that’s leeching time until Grubby comes up with a Grand Plot Twist (GPT) again… Or can be bothered to play that old V1.3 game again.
Harold:…
Barf: Besides, if you put ‘time’ into something it becomes über awesome instantly!
Harold: Really?
Barf: Yes! You see, ‘Timelines’, ‘Timepiece’, ‘The New York Times’, ‘Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time’, ‘Illusion of Time’ (That’s Illusion of Gaia for the Yanks. Yes, another SNES RPG) ‘Lord of the Time Rings’ etc.
Harold: I thought it was just ‘The Lord of the Rings’?
Barf: Yes. My point exactly!
Harold:… But there is no ‘time’ in that…
Barf: Imagine how awesome it would be when there was!
Harold: Pretty damned awesome. But if this episode is called ‘freaking hawt’, what is freaking hawt? Cause it’s certainly not you.
Barf: … No… I’m macho, super macho. And a Viking*, but not freaking hawt.
Harold: Then what is?
Grubnessul: This is!
Narrator: Meanwhile back in the mines of Morea…
The hot water slowly made it’s way down over the female curves of her freaking hawt body. She breathed the steamy hot air as her hands gently rubbed the milky white soap over her cream white, sweaty well formed….
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: WHAT THE F*UCK ARE DOING? DON’T THOUCH THE HOT WATER!!!!111
Random Elfish Friend (REF): Ardberg, what are you doing?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Being wet, steamy and soapy!
REF: Why? That silly date of yours?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Aye!
REF: I thought you stopped playing that silly game a long time ago?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Hey, it provides a good living!
REF: It’s a silly game!
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: You know of any other game that collects such bad story, game play and 11 million horny geeks to stare at these cream white, silky soft…
Animal planet presenter: Hooters. Hooters, or owls, are birds of prey that favour to hunt at night.
REF: So… what’ll you wear?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: Dunno yet… I was thinking of the Heavy Hauberk of Hawtness…
REF: And beneath that?
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: The Short Skirt of Stainless Steal?
REF: Hmm I’d take the Purple Panzer of Pure Pwnage in that case…
Ardbeg Morning-hangover: That thing? Wouldn’t go by my hovering horned horny helmet…
REF: Take the Cackling Crown of Candy…
Narrator: And that is the proof why all the fantasy female warriors in scantly, chain mail bikini armour would never work in reality.
Meanwhile in Burgundy:
Burgundian king: Muhahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha!
Burgundian servant: What is it, my Burgudian lord?
Burgundian king: We have them now!
Servant: Who?
King: The Viking brothers!
Servant: Who?
King: Olav O’Reily and Knud Y’Reily!
Servant: I don’t think they’ve ever been mentioned before in this AAR, sire.
King: So?
Servant: What do we want with them anyway?
King: They’ll serve as bait…
Servant: Bait for who? Harold and pals?
King: Harold? Why would I want to lure him?
Servant: To take revenge?
King: …
Servant: No?
King: …
Servant: Than who do you want to lure?
King: …. No idea… Somebody!
Harold: This is getting silly…
Barf: Yes!
Harold: So will the next update also be a Timeleecher?
Barf: I fear so… Grubby isn’t exactly working hard on this AAR…
Harold: So we go through all this nonsense just because Grubby fails to update more often?
Barf: Yes…
Next: Timeleechers: What if Grubby didn’t fail to update more often?
* And yes, Vikings are super macho, and as we all know by now a Viking is a huge savage dude, about 2 meter high, 1.5 meter wide in the shoulders, weighing about 120 kg (pure muscles ofcourse, no gram of fat), running 80 km/h per hour, with masses of sharp pointed axes and nasty long razor-sharp daggers that can rip your belly open before you can say 'Hey look, Yohan Andersson made another EU3 expansion pack that I have to buy for 20 Euros while those Americans only have to pay 20 Dollar for it.’ And thus super macho.
