Everything is Terrible or; how I learnt to stop worrying and love Neutrality (Switzerlake AAR)

[UristMcLocal]

Hello! For the longest time I have been meaning to do an AAR and I thought that now was as good a time as ever to start one. I usually stream but because of computer issues that has become a bit difficult lately, so I thought it would be fun to do a written AAR instead. Hope you enjoy it.

Everything is Terrible or; how I learnt to stop worrying and love Neutrality
​

Switzerland begins the game in an interesting position. You are caged in by some of the strongest powers in the game; you begin wedged between France and Austria, but through wit, guile and cunning you can destroy them and take the world! These are qualities I lack, and this isn't the first time I've actually attempted to complete this achievement, but like Sisyphus we'll roll the boulder up the mountain and hope it doesn't come tumbling down this time.

Like any truly moral and upstanding individual I abhor violence and so I begin the game by checking on my leader and sending my diplomats off to the biggest and most violent bullies in the region, France and Austria, so that they understand just how much I hate violence and just how willing I am to ally them so that they only employ violence against my enemies.

Frederic Heberlin has decent enough stats and he has served Switzerland well during his time in office. Unfortunately he has been in office for far too long and is now 57 years old, which is an unacceptable age for a leader. We will be getting rid of him at the earliest possible convenience.

I watch from the sidelines as the Hundred Years War drags on and on and come to the conclusion that France is mean, evil old bully who would be best avoided and so I ditch my attempts at getting Austria as an ally and instead commit myself to France. Unsurprisingly France and Austria have rivaled each other and the only neutral course of action open to me is to utilize France in order to bludgeon Austria to death to keep the HRE stable and free of Hapsburgs.

In this time we also Allied Bavaria, Venice and Ulm. My hopes are that Venice and Bavaria will make good allies against Austria and Ulm asked to be my ally politely and so I saw no reason to reject them.

I also start building up my pathetic army and looking for opportunities to reclaim my cores. My attempts to get Venice and Bavaria to join with me against Savoy wasn't going anywhere and so I started to look for other opportunities. I ditched my Statesman and hired a Diplomat in order to impress on other nations just how opposed to aggression I was. I then proceeded to aggressively fabricate claims on all of my surrounding neighbors (the ones who I hated anyway).

Eventually my neighbor Wurttemburg declared war on my other neighbor, Baden. This was a brazen act of aggression and my ally Bavaria joined the defense against Wurttemburg. Swiss forces bravely stood on the border and bravely remained neutral in the face of this unabashed aggression as I was scared of Wurttemburg's alliance with Milan. Bavaria got involved in another war as well, so I bravely came to their defense by accepting their call to arms and hiding in my mountain holdouts counting my gold, listening to the sound of Bavarian men dying in long and bloody battles over the border.

I was still looking for an opportunity to teach Wurrtemburg that violence gets you nowhere when Austria decided to get involved and declare a separate war on Wurrtemburg as well; ostensibly to protect Baden but in actuality just a straight up land grab. I wasn't about to let Austria bully my neighbors, so I declared war within the week and marched my troops into Wurttemburg's land, in order to expand my empire and to ensure that Austria didn't get the siege.

I was fighting a war against Wurttemburg and her allies without any allies of my own, but this didn't matter as Austria was more then willing to fight my battles and lose Austrian lives in order to protect my borders. All the while I sat on Konstanz as the siege ticked away and eventually I was able to secure the province without losing any of my men, thanks Austria!

I secured the province and added it to my country, teaching Wurttemburg that filthy violent opportunists don't get anywhere. Austria was still at war, and so they were unable to demand I return the territory either, all I had to do was core it in time and it would be as if I never stole it in the first place, it would rightfully and legitimately be mine.

But then Austria peaced out as well...

and then everything was terrible...

Blast

 

[Baron Tanks]

Oh man, you had me chuckle there.

and then everything was terrible...

Blast

I urge you to keep up the comedy, I'll be watching

 

[thedirtygerman]

Good start and I really enjoy your writing style.
Keep it up, I'll be lurking.

 

[UristMcLocal]

Thank you for reading this far, hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 2; Peace in our Time!
​

Despite the best efforts of my diplomats our immediate neighbors didn't see the altruistic motives behind Switzerland's expansion and so in order to ensure peace and prosperity throughout the region I hired a diplomatic advisor to travel to neighboring states, explaining in great detail our just and righteous motives so that they understood that I meant them no harm. I wanted to lower my aggressive expansion to ensure that things didn't get any further out of hand (and to ensure nobody dared to coalition me), and so Friedrich Zumbach, my trusted advisor, set out to explain my message of peace to the world.

(Our diplomat upon his return from Austria, with a guarantee that there will be no wars between us (yet))
​

Meanwhile I began to fabricate claims on the rest of my neighbors, just in case my message of peace, love and tolerance didn't reach their ears in which case I would no doubt have to preemptively destroy them in order to ensure that they don't become aggressive. I also sort better alliances outside the Empire, specifically with Poland. This did mean I had to break my alliance with Ulm, but that wasn't a big issue as I still planned on protecting them (when they become another Canton of Switzerland anyway).

Whilst I was spreading my message of love and tolerance to the world, Burgundy did something that was neither loving nor tolerant and declared war on England. I couldn't stand idle whilst Burgundy threatened to bring war to the continent, and so I did what any man in my position would do and began to draw up plans to invade Burgundy and put a stop to this.

​

It was around about this time that I unlocked my first idea group, and naturally I decided to take Influence ideas. By taking influence ideas I would be able to spread my message even more effectively and set aside the fears of others that I am secretly an aggressive, violent and oppressive dictator who would crush Europe beneath his heel if only he had the chance. Hopefully Switzerland would be much more influential, and therefore have a positive influence on the rest of Europe.

(Switzerland having a positive influence on France)
​

The first test of Swiss Influence would come when we began our war against Burgundy. I declared a war of conquest on Burgundy and France was only too happy to join and fight our battles for us. France nobly sacrificed thousands of French lives in order to protect Swiss interests, and because Switzerland is not aggressive or evil; France was helping the entire world by invading Burgundy for us. The only trouble was Castile who was allied to Burgundy, but because of Burgundy's long and vicious war against the English, Castile wasn't interested in helping Burgundy defend itself and so decided to sit the war out. It is heart warming to see the AI employ your own strategies, especially when it benefits me.

Because of my previous aggressive expansion from my not-at-all aggressive conquest of Konstanz, I didn't want to take land off of Burgundy directly. Instead I decided that the best course of action would be a benevolent and understanding approach, one where I annexed Nevers and immediately released it as a free and independent nation. (Free to be my vassal and independent of foreign (I.E. Not Swiss) influence.) I therefore sat my army in Nevers whilst the French did all the fighting.

(Swiss armies expertly and bravely arriving on the battlefield just as the fighting ends)
​

The only thing better then doing nothing is being paid to do nothing. The French opted to subsidies my armies as they sat around in Burgundy pretending to siege provinces. I put the money to good use and opted to save it instead of spending it on a war that France was willing to win for me anyway.

​

After the French had bravely sacrificed thousands of men for pretty much no reason beyond 'Switzerland told me too', I was able to peace out with favorable terms . Nevers would be annexed to Switzerland and then be released as a Vassal. Burgundy would be forced to pay War reparations to me for ten years as an apology for being so aggressive and finally they would pay another 81 Ducats to me because I said so and at this point they weren't in a position to argue. France got nothing except for my gratitude and a very long truce with Burgundy which would prevent them taking any territory for themselves before I had an opportunity to start another war with them as my lapdog. (Thanks France!)

(Peace in our time!)
​

For all the good work he had done during our War against burgundy, we elected to re-elect (awful I know) our Syndic, Ferdinand Munzinger. He was eventually re-elected once more before being consigned to the dust bin at his third election for outstaying his welcome. With his expertise I was able too increase our technology and unlock our first idea, and in return I promptly fired him from his position when he got too old and frail to continue his duties.

(Ferdinand Munzinger, true Swiss Patriot ;_;7)
​

In all this time Austria had been watching from the sidelines, witnessing our peaceful and not-at-all aggressive expansion. They eventually came round to the correct way of thinking and decided that we weren't a threat at all, and despite our earlier actions Austria concluded that Switzerland isn't an aggressive state hellbent on destroying the Empire from within through salami tactics and small but significant conquests. This was great news as it meant that I could finally plan my aggressive expansions in earnest. The next target being my cores in Savoy.

(Austria are willing to trust Switzerland somewhat, for some reason)
​

After a lot of waiting and planning, it was nearly the time to strike against Savoy. France, in a bid not to be out done by glorious Switzerland, declared war on Provence and Castile, calling me into their war. Presumably they wanted me to return the favour and fight on their behalf, but I wasn't willing too at all. I sat my armies in Switzerland and dug in deep, whilst the French made quick work of Provence. Although it didn't seem like it at the time, this French war of aggression would be the distraction I needed to take out Savoy and reclaim my rightful territory.

​

My allies have always been hesitant when it comes to Savoy, and Savoy's alliance chain, although not brilliant, still makes them difficult to take out without help from others. Savoy was allied to Brittany, Siena and Tuscany, and whilst I was confident I could take on two of them by themselves, I doubted I could take on all three of Savoy's allies at the same time. I noticed though that for some unknown reason, Tuscany had joined the French war against Provence on the French side. This meant we were mutual allies fighting in a war together. That meant that if I attacked Savoy now, Tuscany would be unable to join. Furthermore Siena was hated by pretty much all the italian states, and unless Tuscany joined the war they would be unable to assist Savoy without moving their troops across the Mediterranean. Finally I wasn't sure if Brittany would be able to get access through France, although I didn't consider them much of a threat either way.

With this in mind, I declared war on Savoy during the French war on Provence, a war within a war. None of my allies would join except for my little vassal, but I was confident that it would all be fine.

(I forgot to take a picture of my war deceleration so have this one instead. This is the first time I have ever seen this event, but apparently not only does Castile send spies against me, but so do the rebels, pirates and natives).
​

As I predicted Tuscany didn't join the war, and Siena and Brittany were unable to send any troops to assist. It was Switzerland versus Savoy, no hiding in the Swiss mountains this time. My opening move was to hide in Savoy's mountains instead, whilst using the French gold I had horded to build a sizable mercenary army. Savoy had a slightly higher force limit then me, but I had the most Ducats. I sieged down the target war goal and waited for an opportunity. They sieged down my capital but that was alright, I needed to wait for the right moment to attack them, when they moved out of the mountains and into the Grasslands of Vaud.

That moment came, and we charged Savoy.

(Perhaps the first proper fight I have actually fought this entire game, and we are almost 20 years into it.)​

The battle went well, and Savoy's army was broken. I sent our troops to chase them down, and luck was on our side. Our troops made it to Nice in time to stack wipe Savoy's entire army. All that was left to do was to siege down all of their provinces so that we could end the war before Savoy's allies could assist and prevent us from winning.

We sieged Savoy down in no time, and before their allies could assist we were able to reclaim our core provinces, Vaud and Wallis. Switzerland is now whole, and there are a lot of opportunities for expansion. For once everything was great, and nothing was terrible! Switzerland had grown tremendously and I was on my way to spreading my message of peace, love and tolerance to the rest of Europe, and eventually the world!

(Switzerland, loved by all, hated by no one (except a few countries who aren't even worth considering))
​

Everything was great, but that was when I noticed something was terribly wrong...

​

Damnit Austria make up your sodding mind for once.

​

​

 

[Sunspawn]

Wait, is your ruler's name Mazinger?

 

[UristMcLocal]

We had Ferdinand Munzinger but he got old so he had to go.

 

[Sunspawn]

No wonder you won those wars then - the man could have become either a god or a devil. Probably Rocket Punched the Burgundians or something.

 

[UristMcLocal]

Chapter 3: The Coalition​

Our borders secure and our cores reclaimed, it was once again time to turn to our other neighbors and see how they were getting on, see if there was anything Switzerland could do to assist them. Unfortunately, despite our good intentions, it appeared that Burgundy still harbored resentment due to the fact that we forced them to release Nevers. This wouldn't do at all, how could anybody hold a grudge against Switzerland? We had been acting in Burgundy's best interests when we invaded their homelands and burnt their villages with the help of 20,000 frenchmen. They needed a stern talking too, so we sent a Diplomat, with a diplomatic entourage, backed up with 11,000 Swiss Troops and 30,000 Frenchmen to show Burgundy just what a truly aggressive war looks like.

(Our Second Swiss Conquest War to show Burgundy what real aggression looks like, so they don't mistake this sort of war with the sort we fought with them before)
​

Our highly trained and professional 'peace keeping force' was able to fight off the Burgundians who were aggressively defending their villages. Our peacekeepers were able to secure the provinces we wanted whilst the French did other miscellaneous work ('E.G. Fighting'). Now that we had successfully shown Burgundy what a truly aggressive war looks like, it was decided that the best way of ensuring peace and prosperity in the region was to distribute the land to nearby smaller states. It just so happens that the only small state that was suitable for the task was Nevers, who just so happened to be my vassal. As there were no better candidates I gave Nevers Charolais and France-Comte. I refrained from giving France anything because they already have enough as it is and its high time they learnt to share.

(Just and equitable outcome)
​

Despite how quickly and easily the war was won, we did take some losses and so I quickly set about building our Peacekeepers back up to full strength, just incase we needed to secure any more peace elsewhere in the region. I was also somewhat worried about being coalition'd but it didn't occur, my AE was still just under the magic line and the only country who was outraged at me was Lorraine, who quickly changed its mind after a quick chat with our diplomats. Even Austria still loved me.

Despite my best efforts however, the region was far from a peaceful place. Bavaria was steadily and aggressively expanding and even closer to home Baden was getting up to no good. Their evil intentions became clear when they declared war on Ulm, unprovoked.

​

In the past I had been allied to Ulm but I had broken that alliance to hook up with larger states and now Ulm was being eaten. I couldn't let this go unchallenged and so I bravely placed my army on the border with Ulm so that they could shout mean things at the invading Army. I wasn't about to actually declare a war because my Aggressive Expansion was still too high, and so I was forced to watch as Baden annexed Ulm like the evil little country that it is. From that day on I vowed that one day, when the time is right I would take the fight to Baden and liberate Ulm (or at least make it a region of Greater Switzerland). Baden wasn't impressed with that however.

(Spoiler Alert: Baden came back and destroyed Ulm because I trapped him on a freezing death planet where his wife ended up dying)
​

Ulm wasn't the only country in the region with problems, Bavaria had a few issues of its own. They hadn't taken my message to heart and had expanded at an alarming rate; aggressively stealing whatever land they fancied. This has backfired on them; aggression doesn't pay off, you should only expand in order to help your neighbors, like Switzerland!

(In all seriousness this is the largest coalition against an AI state I have ever seen, what the hell Bavaria?)
​

Immediately I began fabricating a claim on Bavaria, hoping I would be able to take part in the Coalition War. In a Coalition War with the Coalition CB, provinces you have claims on can be taken for ridiculously low AE, less then 2 AE per province even when they are Empire Provinces. This is a once in a blue moon opportunity, but unfortunately at first it looked like the boat had sailed, and I had missed it. Before I could finish my claim, Austria called the Coalition War.

(What did you do to deserve this Bavaria?!)
​

I still had a chance however, even though the entire Coalition was fighting Bavaria, I was able to join the Coalition after the war had begun. Before you can start a Coalition War using the Coalition CB, your Coalition has to reach a certain size. A Coalition of just me wouldn't normally be big enough to grant the CB, however even though we were for all extents and purposes in separate Coalitions, all the states currently at war with Bavaria counted as my Coalition partners, so I was able to declare my own independent Coalition War with the Punitive CB.

With the Punitive War CB you only get the ridiculous AE reduction on provinces you have claims on, and there was only one Bavarian province I could claim. It was still a 6 base tax province however and this would be the only opportunity I would ever get to really utilize such a CB without manufacturing this sort of situation through dirty tricks (Seriously I still have no idea why or how Bavaria got so much AE, normally you'd have to cause the AI to take that much). Our Coalition was declared and we moved our Peacekeepers into Bavarian to opportunistically snag whatever we could whilst also spreading our message of peace, love and tolerance.​

​

Memmingen was ours, and we only took 0.9 Aggressive Expansion to take it. This was certainly our finest victory yet, a victory for all true, decent, aggression hating, modern, humane and tolerant people. Bavaria was cut down to size and Memmingen was now protected as part of Greater Switzerland. Austria had aggressively declared another war whilst we were battling Bavaria. So long as Austria stayed at war for the next 17 Months, we would be able to core the province before they demand we return it! This was our chance, our chance to expand our actual borders without Austria crying about it like a little baby!

It wasn't to be....

​

Getting pretty sick of this Austria.

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Probably not going to be an update tomorrow so I thought I would give you this now. Any feedback is always appreciated and I hope you enjoy it

 

[Michaelangelo]

Just stumbled across this AAR. You humour is genius.

I don't see why Austria is so upset with you. It's not like you're aggressively expanding like Bavaria. Switzerland only spreads peace and happiness.

 

[UristMcLocal]

I just want to spread my message of peace, love and tolerance to the world. It just so happens the only way to do this is burn down their villages

 

[UristMcLocal]

Because its unlikely I will be able to play at all today, I quickly made this instead to sum up the campaign so far.

Intermission 1​

Switzerland - 'New Empire, what do you think?'
​

Switzerland - 'Picked it up in the HRE yesterday'
Austria - 'Nice Vassal'
Switzerland -'That's Nevers, and the Government Type is something called 'Administrative Republic'
​

​

Bavaria - 'That's very cool Switzerland, but that's nothing; look at this'

​

Austria - 'That is really nice'
Bavaria - 'High base tax, with a Coalition, what do you think?'
Switzerland - '...NIce'
Austria - 'Jesus how'd a nitwit like you get so aggressive?'

I can't believe that Austria prefer's Bavaria's Empire to my own.
Austria - 'But wait, you ain't seen nothing yet'

​

Austria - 'High Base Tax, Emperor of the HRE, Archduchy'
Switzerland - 'Impressive... very nice...'

​

Switzerland - 'Let's see Baden's Empire'

​

Look at that subtle aggressive expansion, the tasteful borders on it, oh my God, he's even annexed Ulm...

​

 

[Baron Tanks]

Whahaha, that last one, you almost have me choking here. Great movie too, nice and schlocky

 

[UristMcLocal]

Hello again! Here is the newest update on my Campaign, thank you to all of those who have been following along so far, I hope you enjoy it! I haven't been putting these into spoilers yet, but I noticed a lot of people do this. Would this be preferable for people? If so please tell me and I will edit these posts and spoiler the updates.

Chapter 4: Revenge of the Swiss
​

The King of Baden shall suffer in this life and the next for what they did to poor Ulm. Had they learnt nothing from Switzerland? You can't be successful if you are aggressive and hateful, it is only through co-operation and peace that a region can truly develop. With this in mind I began formulating my plan to aggressively dismantle Baden for being a nasty aggressor. There was nothing to stop us from declaring on Baden immediately, but going to war so soon would do us no good. As has already been shown time and time again, I only really have the best interests of my neighbours in mind, and so I began by proclaiming a guarantee on the small nation of Ansbach. By doing this I could protect them from Baden aggression, and if it meant that they would be more inclined to be peacefully annexed later, then all the better.

My truce with Burgundy was almost up, and relations between our countries were still at a low point. They hadn't learnt anything from our previous wars and so with a heavy heart I prepared to attack them when the truce ended. If they weren't willing to learn my lesson of love and peace then I would have to kick them out of the region permanently. It was only fair, they had been given ample opportunity to stop hating us but they simply couldn't get over the fact that I had stolen their land and given it all to an upstart Duke who had conveniently sworn his loyalty to Switzerland.

And so with the help of France we declared war....

Or we would have done, if not for this.

​

And so we got dragged into a pointless war that wasted several decades, gained us nothing and diverted me from my true goals.













Except every cloud has a silver lining.

So far every time we have tried to take land off of another HRE member, Austria has been a huge bully and demanded that we return it. Their up and down relationship with us has been a huge cause for alarm, as they can't seem to make up their damn minds about whether they hate us or not. As everyone knows however, being at war is basically a sort of magic, Whenever a war is declared, a magic veil descends on the nation preventing the Emperor from demanding that we return territory. Presumably there is some Swiss Wizard hiding away somewhere keeping the whole thing ticking. Whilst France is busy fighting a long and tedious war against England (and wars against England are always long and tedious), we can free Ulm from the clutches of Baden and core it before the Emperor gets a chance to demand we give it back! Everybody wins! (Except Baden)

(Swiss Wizard hard at work protecting Switzerland from Dragons and Austrians)
​

The only thing more magic then magic is money, capitalism is a very powerful form of magic. Not only would this pointless war be a useful smokescreen against Austria, it would also serve as an excellent money making racket. As a consequence of Switzerland's comprehensive non-intervention policy (it is comprehensively understood that we will only intervene when it suits us), helping France 'fight' England wouldn't actually cost us any money; once again our troops wouldn't be leaving the Swiss Mountains. We were still able to raise war taxes though, and not only that but Venice was also more then happy to subsidize my armies whilst they sat around doing nothing. Everybody wins! (Except France and Venice)

​

And so everything was set. It was time to teach Baden a lesson. France wouldn't join this war but we didn't need them anyway, Baden had lost all but one of its allies. Once again, it goes to show that nobody likes an aggressor. For the first time in our long alliance, Venice was willing to help us actually fight a war. This was great news, but even without Venetian backup, Baden was doomed.

​

And so war was declared, and as expected it was pretty uneventful. It didn't take us long at all to overrun Baden, they had no chance against our highly organised and trained Peacekeeping force. Ulm was swiftly occupied and ripped from Baden. The citizens of Ulm were grateful for our assistance. They were ready to take charge and become an independent state once more, free from foreign intervention by any and all nations. We guaranteed them that freedom, the freedom to be another province in our ever expanding swiss empire. Baden wasn't gone, but their dreams of empire building had been shattered.

(Try Annexing Ulm now you stupid, aggressive expander!)​

Surprisingly, despite our honorable intentions, not everyone agreed with our actions or measures. They would understand however, in time. Our message of goodwill and peace would spread, even if we had to spread it by the sword.

​

They would understand eventually. We were still at war however and waiting on France to finish up with England and peace out. Despite the war, we were making significant peace time developments as well. Our second idea group had been unlocked, and as Switzerland is such a understanding and tolerant nation, it was only right that Humanist Ideas should be our next idea group. Through adopting Humanist ideals we could become a better nation; it had absolutely nothing to do with trying to trick or brainwash people into supporting our repressive and backwards regime, not at all.

​

Things were quiet for several years. The issue with an AI war against England is the fortress nature of England. France had absolutely no hope of Landing in England and England had no way of taking back the provinces that France had occupied. It was simply a matter of waiting till ticking war score happened so that France can peace out for the provinces it wants. This wasn't necessarily a bad thing for Switzerland however; we had accumulated a fair amount of aggressive expansion as a direct result of our not-at-all aggressive expansions. The only target we had outside of the HRE was Burgundy, and there was no way we could take them on without the help of France. So we had to wait, and wait, and wait, until France and England we were ready to make peace.

​

The inevitable happened, and in Jaunary 1482 France peaced out for Labourd and Calais. It was time for us to declare on Burgundy. They had been too aggressive for far too long, there could be no guarantee of peace so long as Burgundy remained in the region.

​

The sides were evenly matched. It would come down to a single battle. If we could break Burgundy's army then peace would prevail. If our armies were broken by the dark hordes of Burgundy, then a new and dark age of tyranny would descend upon the continent (probably). The war would come down to a single battle, and one side would have to decide where it was fought and on what terms.

Burgundy made the decision.

They chose poorly.

​

Victory was ours. With the help of France our brave Peacekeeping Force pushed the advantage and we were able to secure Bourgogne, kicking Burgundy away from our borders. Peace had been secured. We were able to leave the war with Bourgogne in the hands of our loyal Vassal Nevers. For once I decided I would be nice to France, and so I once again refused to give them anything from the war, they still had far too much land and they were starting to look a bit fat, honestly they could do with a diet at this point. Refusing to give them territory was for their own good.

​

For the first time in a while, Switzerland was actually a peace. No war against Baden, England or Burgundy. Ansbach had been so impressed with our peaceful nature and respect for the sovereignty of other nations that they clamored to join our two countries together even further. They weren't threatened into joining us on pain of death, not at all. It was entirely legitimate, and the international observers we bribed spoke too all agreed that our referendum on whether Ansbach should join Switzerland was entirely legitimate. Now that we had a new vassal, it hardly made sense to keep Nevers around as a Vassal, and so our diplomats were dispatched to Nevers immediately. After a stern word with the Duke of Nevers, we were able to violently occupy begin the peaceful process of annexation.

(and so begins the 100% legitimate and voluntary annexation of Nevers. There was much rejoicing).
​

After a few years, Nevers was an official part of Switzerland, and we could look to spread our message even further. During this time we had our first opportunity to spread our message to our non-christian brothers in the Ottoman Empire. We regretfully declined, as we didn't want to be beaten into a pulp just yet. Venice was being aggressively attacked by the Ottomans, and so we stuck firmly to our principles of defending against aggressors by leaving our long term ally Venice to fight the Ottomans off themselves. It is hardly my fault that they failed to secure better allies, but they didn't see it that way and our alliance was dead. I am sure they will come out on top (maybe, possibly, if they are lucky).

(We are 100% behind you Venice!, Geographically speaking at least. Good luck though!)
​

In December 1487, our Cartographers were tasked with updating our official maps, marking Switzerland's new acquisitions and position in the world. Switzerland was quickly becoming a real force for good in the world.

 

[Michaelangelo]

So the secret to Switzerland's power is its wizards. They don't happen to hire themselves out from time to time, do they?

Every nation needs an ally like Switzerland. France would be obese without their help.

 

[UristMcLocal]

Can't really spare them I am afraid, they are hard at work trying to improve our armies.

 

[ManderTea]

Brilliant AAR, great humour and impressive empire building. Keep up the good work!

 

[Concrete]

I've been enjoying this quite a bit so far. From my own experience playing as a HRE minor, the day you put Bavaria out of commission for good is one of the happiest.

 

[TheArrogantOne]

Subscribed. Really fun to read and moreover you are a fairly skilled player. Long live Switzerland!

 

[MiniaAr]

I will be following this one with great interest, the world needs good peacekeeping. Keep it up.

 

[thedirtygerman]

Keep up spreading peace and love throughout the world. There is much need for it around.