Your plan is pure genius. So you are going to colonise North America until you reach the Pacific, then jump to Asia and conquer everything till Holland. At the same time your other group of drunkards is going to cross the desert, own Morocco, then Aragorn and France. And finally you will be able to launch a simultaneous attack on England from the East, West and South.
Even I could not come up with something so efficient.
By the way it looks as if we are about to see another unification... this time in Scandinavia!