Sol’s Star, CSJ Battle Summaries

[Prussian Havoc]

In starting this series of stories, I am taking my cue from @Kereminde and his ambitious White Reach, @stnylan and his very accomplished Journal of the Silver Daggers and @Secondlight and his remarkable Journal of a MechWarrior Series as well as my Troika of BATTLETECH muses @Hatchy, @HBS_TheBaron and of course the incomparable @HBS_Eck.

In preparation for this effort, I have even set up a Profile on GameDev.net - Prussian_Havoc

Over the next three years or so I will be a full-time Graduate Student and Graduate Research Assistent...

...but I am going to need a creative-escape, preferably a Big and Stompy creative-escape. At least for now, these Battle Summaries will start me on just such a path.


Battle Summaries are something I have created both professionally and for gaming purposes. While I have no professional Battle Summaries and Narratives I can share, I have a wealth of fairly dry but very technical Battle Summaries (OPORD, Operational Assessment and Battle Tracking) over on PGI’s Clan Smoke Jaguar portion of their MWO forum:



Well that is the Past.
Now onward to the Future.

I am running a BATTLETECH Career Attempt using @bloodydoves Clan Beta Mod. The Battle Summaries I write about here will be reflections of my above BATTLETECH Career Attempt.

I chose Clan, because the Clan Invasion is my favorite BattleTech era.

I chose Clan Smoke Jaguar because I have a professional inclination (Military Retiree after a 23-year Military Intelligence career) to identify with the Best an Opposing Force has to offer.

I chose Solahma... well I chose Solahma because I am old, I am old and in some ways broken myself. So here, I will be writing from my own strength of experience. I will be writing what I know, cloaked in the guise of BattleTech (something else I know.)

Eventually I will move to a format similar to @Secondlight ‘s, with each thread being about the exploits of Sol Everson’s Solahma Star on a given World along the Clans’ Path of Invasion into the Inner Sphere.

But for this thread, I will be brainstorming and interacting with whomever decides to stop by as I slowly piece together my intentions and plans for this BATTLETECH Career Attempt and the story it will tell. : )


Item of work:
1.) backstory Sol (Disgraced and old Bloodnamed Clan MechWarrior)
2.) backstory Sol’s possession of the ARGO (Destruction of the ARGO’s previous Inner Sphere owner)
3.) backstory Sol’s use of Inner Sphere Mechs, pretty much exclusively for the time being (Solahma Unit, should suffice )
4.) work out how to find opportunities within the BATTLETECH Career Attempt for a Goodly cross-section of Clan-v-Clan Trials of Position, Possession, Retribution, etc. (Skirmish Mode should put this in play nicely.)
5.) address within a BATTLETECH context Clan Smoke Jaguar Solahma expressions of Zelbrigin, Batchall, Clan Culture snd Solahma ”Sunsetting” / planned Human Obsolescence, etc.
6.) how best to compel a 3050 Clan Invasion story from a 3060's Clan Beta Mod. Witness, this Emperor Crab:

This framework gives me place to start. : )

What are your questions, comments, Writing Warstories and constructive criticism?

And as ever, have a great day and ever better tomorrows. :bow:

 

[stnylan]

Just posting quickly to say all the best with his endeavour. Will follow with interest.

 

[Prussian Havoc]

Just posting quickly to say all the best with his endeavour. Will follow with interest.

Thank you Good @stnylan. :bow:

I find I have not yet touched upon my references to “Disgrace and Purgatory” in this thread’s Title. My protagonist will begin his Story (that ain’t will be telling) as a Disgraced Clan Bloodnamed MechWarrior. His Purgatory... will be his Command assignment to a heavily-restricted and severely-hamstrung Solahma Star during the Clan Invasion fo the Inner Sphere.

I want my Protagonist to be motivated by all the things a Proper “Alpha-Person” Clan Warrior should be motivated by. But I also want circumstances well beyond his control (and from no one’s Malice or Intention) to have conspired to bring him so very low, that he finds himself trailing along behind Clan Smoke Jaguar’s main thrust of the Invasion deep into the Heart of the mighty Draconis Combine, pulling the dreg-Missions one might find on a mix Rasalhague / Kurita worlds in the Clan Security Zone.

He and his Star have the supreme ignominy of having been ordere to ONLY pilot captured Inner Sphere BattleMechs.

And quite like the Dirty Dozen (a favorite War Movie btw) his “6” and only ever 6 Clan MechWarriors (one a TrueBorn like himself, 4 Freebirths with all that implies from a Clan Cultural perspective) will come to be known through their actions and more infrequently but very tellingly, through personal flashbacks.

Each Clan MechWarrior will be a signed a single BattleMech, thus Sol’s Star will only ever have 6 Mech... and a grudging 2 Float Mechs, at its disposal.

Thus there will be no more than 6 Clan Warriors and 8 BattleMechs in-play for Sol. All other BattleMechs will be turned in ( sold as scrap) to the Clan for repurposing.

Best of all In some important ways, I get to explore Zelbrigin, Batchall and Clan Culture from the perspective a Solahma Clan Warrior... who I will portray along the lines of Rutger Hauer’s portrayal of a replicant in Bladerunner. But I’ll give a Clan Solaham spin to Rutger’s famous quote, “I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.”

The driving question of my Storytelling will be, “Just how much can the Heart, Mind and Soul of a damaged, thrown-away Clan Warrior sustain against the backdrop of the Clan’s Invasion of the Inner Sphere.

Will he come to regret the course of his Life?

Will he come to “truly” lead his Solahma Star, or will Sol remain true to Clan Smoke Jaguar expectations and norms?

Just what does the “Lighter Side” a Solahma Star look like?

Do they party?

Do one or more of them come to read Combine Haiku and eventually appreciate Kurita’s Culture and Warrior Spirit as an example?

And if so, how does that impact a Clan Solhama Star moving forward in the wake of an increasingly lost and rudderless Clan Smoke Jaguar?

Does Sol and his Solahma Star remain true to themselves, their Clan, their humanity... and are these all eventually and ultimately the same thing?


I am excited to explore these questions in my storytelling, :bow:


WORKING NOTES:
Mongoose MON-67 (Blaze MT)
Trebuchet TBT-5N (PH, Bulwark)
Jenner JR7-D (Glitch MT)
Icarus II ICR-1S (Paradox SL, Taxtician)
Shadow Hawk SHD-2H (Zombie MT, Bulwark)
Stinger STG-3G (Axle MT)

Taurian World, Paf, Uninhabited, Electronics, Ice World, Ruins (Lasers and TTS)
ARGO: Repaired Power Conduits, Expanded Drop Size 1, (Improved Power Conduits)
Contracts (3 Davion, 4 Taurian and a Pirate Travel Contract)

*NOTE: a challenge I have is that bloodydoves Clan Beta is set after the destruction of Clan Smoke Jaguar. I will use my BATTLETECH gameplay as the centerpiece of my Storytelling, but I need to “re-skin” it to 3050 and Clan Smoke Jaguar’s Invasion of the Draconis Combine (and some level of friction and this various Trials between Sol’s Star and various Clan Ghost Bear nemesis. To accomplish this I will do what I need to do in the Military when as a Military Intelligence Officer I was running a Wargame and Opposing Force for my Commander and his Blue Forces... I’ll get creative and change the names to implicate the guilty, I’ll adapt real results of BATTLETECH gameplay to my own purposes and I’ll overcome the Mod’s focus on the mid-3060’s by embracing my more than 29-year of being a fan of Mitch’s and FASA’s Clans / Barbarian Hordes at the gate of Rome and tapping into 3050 BattleTech Lore and Timelines.

 

[Bregil]

I confess having only a surface-level understanding of the clans so this should be interesting.

 

[Prussian Havoc]

@Bregil, I’ve been playing BattleTech since the beginning and even I hope to learn more about the Clans in the process of telling this Story.

Of course, given the topic (Solamha Units) after some measure of time I’ll have collected and reviewed all that is readily available.

Eventualy I’ll be called upon to “fill in the blanks” and no doubt, smooth some rough edges... and to be completely honest I’ll be just as likely to roughen some smooth edges.

Artistic License, my eldest daughter (who is attending University for 4D Art) would say is a good thing. : )

 

[BARBOSA (Aries)]

Looks interesting. I'll be watching

 

[Mabberton]

Given the Smoke Jaguars general attitude towards freebirths, it should be an interesting experience for Sol to command a "mixed" trueborn/freeborn outfit. Looking forward to it.

 

[Kereminde]

So I got tagged...

Excellent to see my hard work collating the tabletop data inspired someone If my brother wasn't hard-at-it playing through his own copy I'd be trying to do ... something, with regards to an Ironman Career Mode

 

[Prussian Havoc]

Given the Smoke Jaguars general attitude towards freebirths, it should be an interesting experience for Sol to command a "mixed" trueborn/freeborn outfit. Looking forward to it.

And I hope to capture much of that... at least after a fashion.

Key here is that no one collection of Peoples, no one Faction is universally Bad

universally Evil

universally Arrogant-to-the-point-of-Self-delusion

universally Irredeemable


Sol and his Star will breath some LIFE, some depth, some nuance, some truth into a BattleTech Story, bolstered with what I’ve learned about combat and combat leadership during my more than 1200+ days deployed to Afghanistan and Iraq and 23-year career in the Military.


Some backstory:
I enlisted as a Private First Class in 1990, during a long, long time of peace where the only “combat” was trips to the National Training Centers... imo not all that unlike the Clans prior to the Outbound Light triggering the sequence of events that culminated in the CLAN INVASION.

As a Tactical Intelligence Officer I was assigned to many different Units. Over the years I’ve served on (and come to appreciate the highly nuanced Culture of) a number of different Branches of Military Service - Armor, Infantry, Aviation, Special Forces and Air Defense Artillery. I’ve attended Basic Training as a Private First Class, then later served as the XO of a Basic Training Company, commanded a 130-person Patriot Headquarters Battery, commanded a 30-person Recruiting Company, and eventually served on Intelligence Staffs at Division, Corps and Echelons Above Corps Levels.

I retired a Lieutenant Colonel after serving more than three years in the Pentagon, on the Joint Staff J2, assigned to the Defence Intelligence Agency.


I’ve a wealth of experiences (simply check out Stephen Stroble at LinkedIn)... I just don’t know if I can translate that onto the digital page!!! :shrug:



But the pressure is really on as Hatchy has put me on notice! : )




I’ve already stopped and started a number of times over the past 24-hours. I’ll keep after @Hatchy, I’ll keep after it!

(Oh, and no more donuts until after my first Storytelling Post! : ) )

 

[Prussian Havoc]

Good @Bregil, helped me spark and work through some of the follow. Thank you Good Sir. :bow:

Combat won’t necessarily be the centerpiece of every single Story about Sol and his Star. No, if anything I want to see if I can capture those moments of down time for Sol and his MechWarriors.

Can I find a touch of humor in my writing?

Can I find a dash of courage/resolve-in-the-face-of-institutional-bias and strength/perseverance when faced with blatant, arrogant racism (for being Freebirth) in my writing?

Can I give substance to what so many assume are just Clanners being Clanners? Especially given I will be writing about Clan Smoke Jaguar.


I don’t want to invalidate the Oppressively Effective Antagonist that the Smoke Jaguars proved to be. But I do want to capture how their Warriors were people much like any other people of the BattleTech universe, except that their Jaguar-specific Culture and Military Norms purposely and were even engineered to quash non-Standard Inspiration, Innovation and Individuality (#LeasonLearnesFromClanWolberine)... leaving in many cases the exact “surface” reality of Clan Smoke Jaguar that FASA and the early BattleTech fiction writers presented to us.


But scratch that surface and we find all the swirl of insecurity, doubt and yes, even individuality that we see evident in so many other BattleTech Factions and Cultures.

Yes, I want to address Clan-manifestations of PTSD, Clan-manifestations of Hero-complexes and Clan-manifestations of people who just want to keep their heads down and survive “this next battle.”

I will craft the best combat scenes that I can, but I hope it is some of the interpersonal writing that draws kind comments and sparks some passionate discussion.

 

[Prussian Havoc]

PLACEHOLDER

 

[BARBOSA (Aries)]

I liked. Off to a good start.

I was very surprised with Saul and Loren deaths. I thought they´d be the story MC and sidekick/best friend/SO. But then again, even a single survivor is remarkable considering the OPFOR size.

Those * marked scenario description reminded me the writing style of a screenplay published as RPG sourcebook.

About constructive criticisms... I really liked. No major complaints. But let´s see... There are some minor grammar mistakes that don´t prevent understanding, and Saul mech is 1st mentioned as a MAD-3D, even though its a MAD-3R.

 

[Prussian Havoc]

I liked. Off to a good start.

I was very surprised with Saul and Loren deaths. I thought they´d be the story MC and sidekick/best friend/SO. But then again, even a single survivor is remarkable considering the OPFOR size.

Those * marked scenario description reminded me the writing style of a screenplay published as RPG sourcebook.

About constructive criticisms... I really liked. No major complaints. But let´s see... There are some minor grammar mistakes that don´t prevent understanding, and Saul mech is 1st mentioned as a MAD-3D, even though its a MAD-3R.

Thank you, Good @BARBOSA (Aries) :bow:

I admit, the personal affirmation your comments engendered for me will help me stay the course with my efforts at Storytelling.

And your constructive criticisms are Spot On. Evernote is a powerful program, but does not lend itself to writing as much as I had thought. Then again I’ve never used it in this fashion. I’ll check if it was the usual Find All/ Replace All commands and if it has anything that grammar/spell checks.

Great feedback!


As will come more to the forefront in BR#3, and is really driven home in BR#4 (at least as I have them sketched now) the Marauder “Sol” is the enduring main character of this series of Stories.

As far as I know (and if anyone has an example I missed, PLEASE pony it up!) of ALL the great professional and fan fiction in the BATTLETECH Universe...

...there is nothing quite like Kieth Laumer’s Bolos from his Bolo Universe.

I have no intention of Sol becoming self aware ... (*note to self...) but BattleTech absolutely THRIVES on truisms like “Kill the Meat, Keep the Metal.”

Well over time, wouldn’t that Metal have a Story worth telling?

Wouldn’t the Story of all the lives it’s taken and all the lives it’s sheltered, be just as compelling as a Human Main Character?

If you “Keep the Metal” often enough and long enough... I think so.

That is one area I would like to see Modded into BATTLETECH, or maybe better yet, included from the get-go in BATTLETECH 2 - just a simple text field for each BattleMech, wher me the Player can go in if they want and make note of this or that item or date or Campaign involvement, Death of its MechWarrior, notable contribution to winning a Battle, or simply a place for the player to come and tell his own story, a little backstory on the Mech. Or maybe best of all, work to pair MechWarriors and their Mechs over a long term, in part Roleplaying a bond between the two, rather than using Mechs and their MechWarriors be Nomadic in nature, seemingly with never the same pairing twice.

Anyhow, my profound thanks @BARBOSA (Aries) for not just taking the time to read my Story (gosh that hasn’t gotten told yet!!! : ) ) and the for offering up constructive criticism.

Thanks again. :bow:

 

[Bregil]

As Barbosa said, the main critique would be needing a proofreader to catch the occasional typo/grammar error.

That said, this was a very interesting start. I look forward to seeing more in the future.

 

[BARBOSA (Aries)]

2 battlecorps novels from Lance Scarinci, Marauder and Kindred Soul, are about a mysterious mech with some degree of self awareness as much (if not more) than about its mechwarrior story.

Closest thing i know in BT.

 

[Kereminde]

I'm going to read it, but I'll need to set aside some time for giving it a thorough look

 

[Prussian Havoc]

I'm going to read it, but I'll need to set aside some time for giving it a thorough look

You, Good @Kereminde, have been at this much longer than I, and learned many lessons the easy way because of your talent and hard work...

...and no doubt you’ve learned even more lessons the hard way.


Any feedback Good @Kereminde, will be greatly valued. Thank you for giving it a read. :bow:

 

[Hatchy]

And Tarielle’s Hunchback has regained its feet.

With its characteristically loud report and despite the erratic, defensive movement of the Sword of Light Demolisher movinf it is moving diagonally across her front toward her right, forcing her to pivot precariously to her right to keep her AC20 tracking it, Tarielle sends her final AC20 Shell through the precise juncture between Turret and Hull, in truth on level and within half of meter of her aim point just a bit further forward. As precise a shot as Tarielle has ever fired in her life.

Her last foe dies in a towering gout of flame, a roar of sound and a Turret explosively ejected Heaven-ward for more than 50-feet,

Tarielle, immediately moves to Cover, surveils the battlefield and cues the Cluster Command Net. Tarielle reports to Star Colonel Demetrius that Enemy Forces have been annihilated, that their foe included 10 Heavy Vehicles from the Combine’s Elite Second Sword of Light... and that she is the lone survivor of her Star.

Star Colonel Demetrius acknowledges her report, and commends her on her survival and part in the battle. He commands her to hold positions and that her relief is already on its way to her. He informs her that all Clan Smoke Jaguar objectives have been achieved and that he expects her to gather the data recorders from Sol and the other Mechs of Sol’s Lance and that her own Mech and the others of her Star would have third-priority for repairs at the Mech Bay when they return to the Cantonment Area and its Mech Bay.

Shaking her head, Tarielle reflects on the fact that her Solahma Star is named for a BattleMech rather than the BattleMech’s and Star’s Commander... a dull and spiteful irony even there. A profane rift on the adage “Kill the Meat, Keep the Mech.”
[/USER]

Can tell you read maps for a living!

The only real thing I see that is that you haven't really decided on the type of story telling you want to do, right now it's structured like a document with some creative writing elements. The style you ultimately settle on doesn't matter as you will eventually find your own groove, but you should pick a style and work on its structure.

For me, it's more of the creative writing angle. So the above quote I would write like this:

'Tarielle regains her footing and pivots her mech towards the approaching Demolisher, carefully tracking its movement. Aiming at the turret ring, she presses the trigger for her cannon and watches as a stream of large shells roar towards her target.

BA-DA-BOOM! The shells hit home and blast the turret of the tank clear into the air. She watches with satisfaction for a moment before moving her mech into cover and cuing the Cluster Command Net, 'Star Colonel, Objective secured.'

Star Colonel Demetrius' voice crackles in return, 'Excellent, Tarielle. Unit report?'

The weary mechwarrior pauses for a moment to observe her fallen comrades...she is the only one left standing. Tarielle answers, 'Just myself, Star Colonel.'

Now the pause is from his end of the com, 'Hold position. Relief inbound, ETA 1-five.'

'Copy, Star Colonel.'

'And mechwarrior,' He ads, 'collect the data recorders from all the mechs and report to the Containment Area. I assigned you to third priority repairs when your Solahma's mechs are recovered.'

'Copy, Star Colonel.'

And that's my style that I've developed because I think in comic book script and I'm a visual thinker. I took all your words and streamlined it into a couple lines of dialogue and separated the events and actions into their own paragraphs so in my head I can see them as comic panels or a movie scene.

And if you look at the structure of my version, no new paragraph is started with the same word or even the same letter, except when it is necessary for the character.

I suggest using copy and paste and just moving your sentences around until you have a 'shape' to your text that you visually like and then massage the words into that shape.

OR if you like the document format, cram more text into the paragraphs and keep the characters in third person.

There is a hundred ways of doing it and the only wrong way is to not do it in the first place. Keep it up!

 

[Prussian Havoc]

Thank you @Hatchy. I’ll take some time to do just that, with an eye toward a consistent structure centered on the reader’s experience, though I am enjoying the screenplay angle... hmm... if the screenplay angle keeps me writing, like you said, it buys me time to become a more polished and practiced writer.

Thanks you again @Hatchy! :bow:

 

[Hatchy]

'Tarielle regains her footing and pivots her mech towards the approaching Demolisher, carefully tracking its movement. Aiming at the turret ring, she presses the trigger for her cannon and watches as a stream of shells roar towards the target. BA-DA-BOOM! The massive rounds hit home and blast the turret of the tank clear into the air.

She watches with satisfaction for a moment before moving her mech into cover and cuing the Cluster Command Net, 'Star Colonel, Objective secured.'

After an edit, makes for cleaner reading because separates the actions better.

Yeah, just play around with stuff.