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TheChalk

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Feb 19, 2013
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So... about that...

Hello there peasants, my name is Brenin I Cwtch and welcome to Jackass Pomerania POWMEREUNIA
MyBwK87.png

(The result of some fun with Ruler Designer)

Somehow, I ended up as the king of some Slavs or something. At least I'm closer to my fellow Norsemen in "Scandunafia", or whatever they call it.
Here we will conquer, raid, and do sheep other Norse-y Welsh-y things.

Why did I agree to this. ALUN!


---


Welcome to what I hope will be a rather unique AAR, with bad Welsh-isation of words and some very stupid, but hopefully fun decisions.
As such, choices made will be in character, and not always for the best gameplay-wise.

House rules? No cheating or reloading. Other then that, not much

Targets/Challenges: (Reader suggestions are considered and probably accepted)
Become king of Powmereunia
Reform Norse faith myself
Spread the Welsh culture and Norse faith throughout conquered lands
Install the Cwtch dynasty on at least 2 foreign thrones buy endgame (Take that, "Fon Habsbwrgs")


 
Last edited:
Un: How did I get here?

It was a pleasant day. At least, as pleasant as possible in 9th-century Pomerania.

"Duke Brenin, I'm pleased to make your acquaintance." A short, dark-haired hunchback said. He worse simple white robes, and often twitched his fingers as he spoke.

"You must be Alun." replied the Duke. He was tall and commanding, and his breath smelt of mead.

"Yes I am, my Duke. Welcome to Powmereunia."

"Glad to be here, I guess. How big is my domain?"

"Three counties, m'lord. Take a look at this map."

"Surely these are spelt wrong? Pass that quill here..."

25WISRG.png


"Much better."

Alun sighed. "Of course, m'lord. I also have a Débutante to present."

"What's a Debaut... Deibu... one of those things?"

"French word, sir. Basically, we have found another Welsh Norse noble, this one a woman."

"Perfect!" I shall marry her at once!"

"Are you sure...?"

LbGfB5b.png


"Of course! Such a celebration is worthy of mead!"

"Of course. Mead. No extra taxes?"

"Of course not!"

1yLMtvn.png


"Fine. Free mead, no extra tax... okay... so, onto our council."

9uMYnxu.png


"A-ha! Someone likes me!"

"Yes. However, he seems to be the least competent of the lot. What a coincidence..."

"I feel like conquering, Alun."

"Good news. Apparently as Norseman, we have a free ticket to seize coastal provinces, such as Wologoszcz"

"Brilliant! Onwards to Wologs... Wolgos... Wlgas!"

Wcs7Ae4.png


"We're already winning the war, m'lord. Perhaps we should begin a siege?"

"Fightfightfightfightfightfightkillkillkillkillkill"

Wcs7Ae4.png


"Oh dear... are you alright, M'lord?"

"I'm perfectly fine, Alun. Fine and fighting. War going well. Why would you ask? Is something wrong? Alun? Is it the Spanish Armada again?"

T4XP5bt.png


"Spanish Armada, sir?"

"Oh my goodness they've already got Wlodimyr save me Alun"

ZLRrljm.png


"Perhaps you should calm down, sir. Your wife would like to talk to you. Something she read in a book...?"

Pjl5iur.png


"Ah yes, Alun. I remember. Fifty Slavs in Grey or something. Make sure to buy her the sequels, I feel more... content... after my time with her."

"Content, sir?"

"Let's just say I've learned more about enjoying myself when it's rough."

vMp5GfM.png


"Martial skills. Of course. That's what you meant."

"It is! Also, after my experiences, it appears that I'm gotten better at getting people in cuffs..."

rZbjm5g.png
 
This is really funny. I especially like the 'Fifty Slavs of Grey' line. Priceless...
 
This is really funny. I especially like the 'Fifty Slavs of Grey' line. Priceless...

Nice, subscribed. I also liked the Fifty Slavs in Grey joke :)

Thank you both! I'm hoping to get a new chapter up tonight.
As for "Fifty Slavs in Grey", well... It was a little late when I wrote that.
 
Dau: Powmereunia 1 - Dirty Slavs 0​

"Um, Alun... You remember that woman with the bongo drums?"

"Your wife, sir?"

"I think I played the bongos too hard..."

PRNohwY.png


"Well... In other news, we finally managed to win the war."

QnsExbO.png


"Brilliant! I must send thanks to Rhodsmywys. I'm blessed to have a friend like him as a Count."

"About that..."

mBGklvZ.png


"I must have forgotten to provide the new accommodation he requested..."

"This is the 9th century. It's no surprise he has questions about his living standards."

"Can you sort something out?"

"Don't worry, sir. I have the perfect place in mind."

KzyLUVG.png


"What did he think of your offer?"

"I took a few of our 'friends' along with me, and he was more than happy to oblige.

Fendpcj.png


"That Pwyson place sound delightful! We should hold a feast to celebrate this!"

"Of course, my liege..."

KzyLUVG.png


-Diwedd-​
 
I silently appreciated this thread. I'm sad to hear you've lost the save, but it was fun while it lasted. :p I look forward to seeing what you come up with next!
 
Quick question - Are AARs with in-game characters or ruler designed ones more interesting? Just wondering :rolleyes:

Shame that you had to finish, but it was good while it lasted. :)

I'd say that it depends on the character - if it's a well-known character, or one with a bit of substance behind them, then go for it - but ruler designer characters can be great, because you can tailor them to your writing style. As long as you keep the character balanced. I always tend to feel that it's a bit gamey to have a strong, genius ruler. But if you can make them a drunkard, bastard, excommunicated, syphilitic lunatic, then it's fun for the first thirty years.

Either way, I'm looking forward to the next one!
 
Shame that you had to finish, but it was good while it lasted. :)

I'd say that it depends on the character - if it's a well-known character, or one with a bit of substance behind them, then go for it - but ruler designer characters can be great, because you can tailor them to your writing style. As long as you keep the character balanced. I always tend to feel that it's a bit gamey to have a strong, genius ruler. But if you can make them a drunkard, bastard, excommunicated, syphilitic lunatic, then it's fun for the first thirty years.

Either way, I'm looking forward to the next one!

Thanks! And I'm sure drunkard excommunicated lunatic bastard with syphilis is just a by-word for Welsh count!