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StarSword

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I once had an affair with my own daughter from a previous affair. I didn't know it at first as she wasn't marked as mine but after a bit when I noticed who her mother was I got suspicious and used charinfo to confirm it.
Reminds me of the time I seduced my niece to get her to quit with the factionalism. Then married her after my wife died of natural causes and I outlived my first three children. And the funny thing is, she ended up giving me the best player character I've ever had.

Technically she was only a half-niece...
 
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Chris Phoenix

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Oh mine isn't so terrible I think...only about as bad as OP's, except the motive was a bit worse.
Basically my dynasty has a high rate of Lover's Pox lately, and I was maneuvering succession laws so that I could get agnatic primogeniture in a line that could be traced back patrilineally to the dynastic founder. Once I'd gotten that, I had a current ruler who managed to only have one son, who died at 20. His only son was born with Great Pox...so I remarried, and once I got another son and I was tutoring both my son and my grandson, I arranged for the grandson, and heir to have a little "accident" during a boating trip.

I risked being branded kinslayer just to avoid being forced to play as a character with syphilis...in universe that sort of makes it a senseless slaying.
 
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Worffan101

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Set up a medieval eugenics program.

This was really hard, and I had to save scum a few times, but it was totally hilarious. There I am as the Mansa of Mali, and I want to be an Emperor. The former Ummayads are broken (decadence revolt hit them hard at a bad time), Europe is falling to shit, it's 900 AD and I've unified Mali and am working on the reformed West African faith.

However, I'm still out-teched to hell and back despite Learning focus for all but my first ruler. Daddy's gotta get moar skillz.

So I find this chick, prisoner in my palace from the time an Ummayad splinter state tried to screw with me and failed. She has Genius, and Strong.

Oh hell yeah!

So I take her as my concubine (I know, evil even for a medieval despot), and promptly focus ALL of my efforts on getting kids with her. Even drop my learning focus. Get twins first pregnancy, then two daughters, then a son, then she apparently offs herself? Just up and dies on me. But I have some kids with varying degrees of Genius, Quick, and Strong.

Breed 'em, fast. Try to marry them off to fertile-looking people. By 950, I have a host of little brats with varying degrees of traits, but the better ones are lower in the succession.

So I kill my son. Just straight-up murder him in a duel. Then I wait for my ambitious strong genius cousin to rebel and hope like hell that I can pull this off.

He rebels, and I'm able to beat him down at a massive cost, then imprison pretty much all the kids. I throw the undesirables in the black cells and release the rest.

Now I have a mid-sized pod of very well-traited heirs of first, second, and third-cousin status. Marry 'em off.

My next king has Strong, Brave, Diligent, and Just. Ironically he plotted his dad's death for his dad's evil. He promptly marries his cousin, 15 years his junior, who's got a nice Genius Strong trait set. Family focus, 10 years of sucking up to my vassals to apologize for dear old Dad, and I have a nice little brood of decent sprogs. But CURSES! My heir has no good traits.

Plot, assassinate. Dead. New heir is strong brave genius. He is swiftly married off to his strong genius diligent cousin. Sprogs galore.

By 1050, I have almost fanatically-loyal vassals, a much stronger army, and a ruler with Strong, Brave, Genius, Brilliant strategist, Diligent, Just, and Patient. This is gonna be fun. The Ummayads are back as a big duchy and looking to reclaim Spain from the infidels (Navarra is badass in this TL), and Africa from the minor counties. But I snap up the counties like clockwork and proceed to reform the West African faith (got my holy sites and a truckload of piety after a couple of quick conquests).

Then my nephew somehow inherits Mercia. I don't know, it happened. I soon populate England's highest courts with black people and resolve to conquer Britain for sh*ts and giggles. I go feudal, start a holy war for a bunch of Ummayad lands, and get my popcorn.

Thirty years, one ruler, and about 8 wars later, I control a good chunk of Spain, the Mali Empire, England, and Wales. Plus bits of Scotland, and that Irish county my son nabbed. Before I killed him, it went to his brother (my new heir, with Genius), and said kid started a war for its neighbors.

By 1200 AD, as the first murmurs of Mongols started to terrify the shaky Abassid Empire (survived, albeit losing Egypt to a decadence revolt that they've spent the 11th and 12th centuries clawing back from), i'm Emperor of Mali, have primogeniture, high crown authority, reformed faith and almost no infidel problems, and I'm a strong genius diligent just lustful Grey Eminence who controls all of Spain, the UK, Morocco, Libya...pushing into Egypt and squabbling with the Aquitaine powerhouse as the Byzantines push into Germany (yeah, that happened), so I figure, why the hell not? and activate Sunset Invasion.

No sooner have I finished my Great Holy War for Aquitaine (thank you so very effing much, High Priest genius brother), then a horde of obsidian-wielding barbarians are coming to tear me a new asshole, probably because the Incas allegedly have guns. Well, I'm the Ancestors-damned Emperor of Mali, I refuse to stand for this! I proceed to marshal all my armies, gather all of my elite retinues, double-check my tech (I've more than caught up, thanks to a lot of Learning focus, and am now the most advanced militarily in the world), and proceed to meet the barbarian hordes....

They try a hostile landing against a force of my hired religious fanatics and then my main army gets there and it turns into a bloodbath. RNGesus is on my side and this first barbarian onslaught is repulsed, albeit at the cost of over a sixth of my men. I knew that spending my vassal republics' cash on all those castle upgrades was worth it,even if my church vassals are pathetic.

They end up accepting a white peace since I can't click the button fast enough after this stroke of divine intervention, and hit the French duchy quagmire instead...just in time for Temujin to eat the Abassids whole.

So I spent the rest of the century fighting those two damn hordes off.

By 1350 AD, I was back on the offensive, with my entire clan of African supermen ready to dominate the world for the Malian master race. The Mongols were fragmenting, the Aztecs had the damn French revolting against them, the Byzantines had held against the Mongol hammer but had ironically lost most of Anatolia (though they were chipping it back), and Finland took over Sweden and Norway (Christianity spent most of the 9th through 11th centuries with really low moral authority, and so Scandanavia was still pagan by the 14th century. Being Finns (and therefore badass by nature), these Northern warriors took Denmark, apparently reformed THEIR faith, converted most of the Norse, and tore at the slowly-dying Lotharingians who had ceased long ago to be a serious power, slowly retracting despite being surrounded by weak states. Between the Aztecs (before their hold slipped utterly), the Finns, and the Byzantines of doom (plus a rising Russia/Poland/Lithuania ungodly abomination), Germany was partitioned, just in time for the French to take back their land, mostly. At least they got the whore of Europe from the Germans, so they can be happy about that.

So now it's 1420 and I'm prepping to transfer to EU4, and I have this empire of Malian supermen that's tearing great bleeding chunks out of the Mongols (they really shouldn't have taken India), eating the French whole, and starting to come into conflict with the Finns and Byzantines. All this time I'm still plotting and assassinating every possible heir who has even Quick or lacks Strong, just to keep my African bloodline pure.

Oh, and Britain and Ireland are mostly Mande culture and ruled by black people, as is Spain and North Africa. Hail Mali!
 
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Dragatus

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Not as bad as some of the others, but still fun: I wanted to marry my heir to a woman, but he was staying at his mother's court rather than mine (we were both counts under the same liege) so I could only arrange him to marry someone in my court. The solution? Got the woman married to one of my childless baron vassals whose heir I was and had the guy murdered. Got his barony and all his court, including his widow which I then promptly married to my son.

Also: "Oh hey, we sieged down another castle in Muslim lands and got 30 prisoners, half of them children. I have way too much income to bother with ransoming them, so let's just execute them all."

Another thing that happened which was actually more funny than evil was when my wife was cheating on me, but the spies never managed to find anything incriminating. So I sucked it up and accepted my heir wouldn't really be my actual son. But then I got him a wife and pretty much as soon as she arrived at my court I got a message that I think she fancies me (I'm playing without WoL). So I started an affair with her and all the children she ever produced were mine, thus restoring my actual bloodline's hold on the throne. Sometimes you really need to fight fire with fire. ;)

An actual evil one: I was playing in India and wanted to unlock the Kali Maaa achievement. I kept assassinating a king's children until I got discovered so he would become my rival and I could imprison him using the rivalry CB and then have him sacrificed at the Kali Puja festival.
 
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Lord_P

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Saw that the HRE had gone primo. Matri-married my daughter to the nephew of the current emperor (4th in line to the throne).

Had the rest of the heirs killed. All of them less than 10 years old.

This inadvertently later lead to the extinction of their entire dynasty.
 
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Moarice

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Zohtun

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I had my vassals keep rapi...I mean "Seducing" my wife. I made sure all my heirs (regardless of bloodline, I decided I was just going to be horrible at this point) would always marry into their father's family. Matri-married sons to their own half-sisters and daughters to half-brothers.

It was worth it when the inbred trait started showing up in the bloodlines of the filthy cuckolding vassals.


If that doesn't count, then I'd have to say the times I decided that the Sayyid trait must die or the Karling family had to die. Both times resulted in the death of dozens of children, men and women if matri-marriage was a thing.
 
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kviiri

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I nailed some hats to the heads of some poor envoys.


In CK2+, I shagged this one guy's wife, wounded him in a duel, kidnapped him, banished him from Sicily to Crimea, invited his only son to court just to murder him easily, and then invaded his new home just to imprison him again.
 
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Cathal341

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Murdered 4 young sons and 3 young daughters of a King and then the King himself in order to get the 4th Daughter on the throne who was Married to my Heir in order for my Grandson to Inherit 2 Kingdoms.
 
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qer

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I suppose it would be my first game as castille, killing my own Mon character so that he inherited the Scotland kingdom. That's I think the one as giving more moral disgust

Ofc most of the game I end up killing half my vassals because they don't want to approve my laws, seduce my sisters so that neighborhood kings get inbred heirs, force revolts on vassals that had dishonor me so that I capture their family and kill then all and finally, when I have money I never take prisoners. But it is all for the good of the kingdom!
 

Vicodin_Addict

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As Heinrich "the Lion" Count of Gottingen 56 years old count with 4 counties and 4 sons, 1187. I did something horrible with his son.

1. Heinrich owned 4 counties, cant create duchies but have 4 strong claims against duchy of Bavaria, Saxony, Tuscany, and Spolleto.
2. Kaiser gave me the titles d_of Brunswick for owning 2/4 of said duchy.
3. Manage to muster some gold, proceed to attack Saxony and won, now become Grand Duke and Marshall of HRE.
4. Heinrich kicked the bucket at age 62, Heinrich II only get 1 county and D_of Brunswick, my brother, Otto got d_of Saxony along with 2 counties within it (sick gavelkind kicking in there), and the rest of counties go to the 3rd, 4th and 5th sons who just born that year (oh the irony).
5. 5 years of living in hell with all my brothers within my jurisdiction hate me, while only controlling 1 county of Braunschweig, I had to content with the council do whatever they pleased.
6. Tide turned on the 6th years of my rulership, my asshole 3rd brother, and also my steward died by the rabble while collecting taxes, led me to inheritance of Gottingen, and the fun started, revoking all counties from my 4th and 5th brothers, alongside Prince-Bishopric and county of Oldenburg controlled by other dynasty under me.
7. Simple bribery and a better relationship with my 2nd brother, Otto, led to NAP and alliance with duchy of Saxony.
8. Bavaria led by 5 years old girl under regency, my weak claim and 4k of Saxony army reinforcement was more than enough to snatch my 2nd duchy.
9. Kaiser Friederich II refused to grant me a spot in the Council, believed that Prince Mayor of Hansa was a far better Spymaster than me, I proved him wrong by bribing his guardsman with a tidy sum of 5 gold, and killing him in his sleep in the Imperial Chamber. "Duke Heinrich II send his regards, biatch!"
10. The new Kaiser from Duchy of Tyrol, knew that it was a mistake to mess with Duke of Brunswick and Bavaria, he immediately appointed me as his Spymaster, wise choice.
11. During period of time, I kidnapped heir to HRE 3 times, just to ransomed him back to his idiot Kaiser-Daddy. Well, what can I say, I need money for new city in Braunschweig named after meself "City of Heinrich" just to feed my ego.
12. Take duchy of Spolleto and Tuscany while the Duke was under regency, hah now I owned 4 duchies to my name, with the help of my brother, Otto, who asked nothing in return.
13. My father in law, Duke of Brandenburg died with idiot son succeed him. No I cannot let that happen, so I killed him in style with falling carriage, and let his 1 year old son succed him afterwards, leaving a big opening of regency, to allow me snatch the duchy in the name of my wife.
14. 5 years later, my wife died of depression, she can't burden the stress of controling Duchy while still mourning his father and brother, leading to natural inheritance of Brandenburg to my son, Heinrich III, and at the same time changing the succession law of Brunswick to Primogeniture, while killing the discontent Counts who stands against me. I don't wanna repeat the same mistakes my father did before.
15. I just need 3 more counties to be able to form kingdom of Germany and now I'm 56 years old, perfect timing to recreate the struggle of my father, and thus I attacked my alliance and my beloved brother, Otto, Duke of Saxony, he did played his role, now its time for him to "relax" in the oubliette designated just for him.
16. Now that the Germany has united under 1 banner of House Welf, its time to relax, I attacked the Kaiser immediately without forming faction 1st ( faction are for sissies, bro), right when he exhausted his forces, battled against the Pope and France for "Anti-Papal War". I won easily under his weak nose, while killing 4 of his sons including 1 infant, just to show my superiority over him.

If you want to be a dick, be a full dick, if you want to be Saint be a full Saint. There's no such thing as half-hearted ruler, because they will soon be extinct :D
 
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thisistherevolt

First Lieutenant
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I kidnap the daughters, sisters, wives, mothers, and grandmothers of anyone who pisses me off and force them into concubinage. Unless I'm Catholic, in which case I still kidnap, but seduce everyone of them, including the grannies. I then disavow the bastards and force them to go into a religious career. Also, the Norwegians kept pissing me off as it seemed anyone with a title in that kingdom wanted to raid me (playing as Alfred the Great and his heirs) so I invaded, took prisoner, and executed anyone with Norwegian culture. I then gave the Kingdom of Norway to a Swede who showed up at my court towards the end of my second rulers life. Completely personal, no business.