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Faeelin

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Let's see. According to my paper, which I should've started a good while ago, I am supposed to unify Germany. Maybe. I wasn't paying that much attention.

Therefore, I decided to unify Germany. Deciding that I want one that's relatively obscure, for the purpose of this thesis I chose the duchy of Orisso, which is located on the border with Poland. Reasoning that Orissa is merely a different spelling, I loaded up my game.

Hmm. Orissa is actually an Indian Hindu nation, located a good twenty thousand miles away. Nevertheless, and not one to be outdone by the rest of my class (slackers that they are) I have decided to do a not one, but 2 tier paper.

My goals are to:

Unify India, which is rich in tea and Indian Ink (presumably). After acquiring a monopoly in those two items, I shall use the funds to:

Unify Germany.
And possibly the rest of the world. I shall either succeed, or crash and burn horribly.
 
Last edited:

Wyvern

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Originally posted by Sharur
I can assure you with great certainty that you'll crash and burn horribly :D

Oh come on, give him some encouragement.

Good luck Faeelin.... cause your gona need it :D
 

Carolus Rex

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Originally posted by Sharur
I can assure you with great certainty that you'll crash and burn horribly :D

What he said. :D

Well, if Peter E2bbesen can succeed with his Tibet thing, I think u can too. :)

Actually, after u united India, taking on the European powers isn't too hard, unless u happend to run into them all at once. :D
 

unmerged(6777)

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Yes indeed...unifying Germany with Orissa will certainly prove to be a little bit challenging. I think you should add another goal to your paper...

Goal #3: Be elected HRE

:D
 

Faeelin

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I wasn't aware hindu nations could become catholic.

Besides, if I do that, I give up my one slider fits all christianity slider.
 

Carolus Rex

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Originally posted by Faeelin
I wasn't aware hindu nations could become catholic.

Besides, if I do that, I give up my one slider fits all christianity slider.

U can't, that's the challenge. :D
 

Faeelin

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To make the logs easy on the eyes, I'll make them short and to the point:

Hmm. Upon examining Bengal’s initial characteristics, two things become apparent:

1) We’re pathetic. We rule two provinces, and are surrounded by Muslims who historically conquered us..

2) On the other hand, most of India is hindu. We are also hindu. Therefore, the stab and manpower would be great fun.

Upon closer examination, I discover a center of trade two provinces to the East. We send an insult, move our diplomatic sliders to max intolerance of Islam, and wait for the declaration of war from Bengal, which comes in 1420.

By this point, I’ve taken out a loan, and immediately raise war taxes. After a series of battles, the heroic simulated armies of Orissa cover all the provinces, and besiege occupy them all by 1427. I don’t take all the provinces, as rebel wars bore me; I leave them two, which are promptly taken by Tibet.

The next 3 years are spent rebuilding the treasury and enjoying watching the merchants go in and out of the Ganges center of trade. 1430 arrives, and I get a random insult against Arakan. Arakan promptly loses the one Bengal province they have.

Hmm. 1440 arrives, and I decide that since I just fought 4 wars against my Muslim neighbors (pacifists. Right) I decide to focus my hatred on Christians. Not knowing of any Christians, and disliking any religion which worships Christmas trees, the move is greeted with much rejoicing by the peasantry, who have an excellent year.

On the other hand, in 1445, God apparently didn’t’ approve, giving the monarch temporary insanity and sending a comet. Bah.

Next came the complete annexation of Bengal in 1447, along with Arakan. This caused Dehli to declare war, which resulted in the loss of four provinces for them. Thus passed 5 years, and I began to look at the Kaliphate’s one province in India.

What the hell, I reasoned. They had no allies, and were very far away.

As one might expect, I declared war on thmm, which also caused Hyperbarad to dishonor its alliance. I used that opportunity to declare war on them.

Taking all but one of their (Hyperbarad) provinces, that part's gong well. But I can’t seem to get the Kaliphate to cede the province, despite having twice its value in victory points. Therefore, I turn and look towards their new ally, the Timurids.

Hmm. Ishafan would be nice, although it would require a conversion…

How can I say no?

Therefore, my mighty armada of SEVEN WARSHIPS goes off to do battle, losing one before arriving off the coast. They rampage through the unfortified provinces, but…

Thirty thousand men come around, and end that little pillaging spree. I take the two provinces and 150 ducats, instead of waiting for them to get military access.

1465:.Apparently that pushed me over to worse than dishonorable scum. Maybe I should have been paying more attention to my bb. Next message: The known world has declared war on you.

Maybe this will be harder than I thought.
 

Faeelin

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Hmm. This has been hard. here's what happened:

Try 1: I anex hyperbarad, and get provinces from vviyanger. The Timurid Empire, which NEVER COLLAPSED poured tens of thousands of troops over the border. Malacca sent 20 thousand troops by sea, and Tibet joined the fun. Despite moving the slider to maximum $$$, I had no manpower pool, and hindus don't get mercenaries.

That game ended.

Try 2: Succeed in holding hte timrurids through cavalry raids, take the provinces of the viyangerites (or somesuch), annex irrawady....

And China and Southeast Asia declare war.


Try 3: I hold in irrawady, and secure India. Assam falls, and China declares war. Fortunately, they starve to death in tibet. I manage to pacify most of asia (gaining a route to malacca), when...

Wave of Obscurantism, followed by a political crisis. Golly.

Try 4: Get to Dai Viet, conquer India, gain Ishafan, and geta land border with China.

That's apparently a bad thing.

Hmm. I could go back to before I had the previous war, but that's too easy.
 

Peter Ebbesen

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...And yet another wannabe world-conqueror discovers the joys of revealing himself in all his glory before he is ready to take over the world. What he should do, obviously, was to release a vassal or two and pretend he wasn't really dishonourable scum, spend a few decades building huge armies (and reannexing the vassals when opportune), force-vassalising the largest neighbours, and revealling himself by diplomatically annexing those large vassals three or four decades later....

With three decades of stockpiled troops (it is impressive what they can do with plastic nowadays), he would be ready to face all comers. But they never learn, except through pain, do they?
 

Faeelin

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Hmm.

I could go back,k but that's too easy. I do believe I have managed it professor, so hah! hah!
 

Faeelin

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Finally. I've finished my finals,k so can devote some time to continuing this.

After Try 54 (give or take some) I managed to survive. And because everyone knows the professor had to as a far easier nation, there’s no problem. Any and all accusations of the use of nuclear weapons to complete my conquests are categorically false.

Here’s a little timeline of what happened.

1465: I asked Visangyer to honor the alliance we were in, which they did not. They then declared war. Against their faithful overlord of Orrisa. Ingrates. Managed to get them down to one province.

1467: Annexed Hyperbarad. The Timurids, Kaliphatians, and other Muslim nations in their alliance offer me peace with 50 ducats. Being of a generous sort, I accept.

1470: Kutch is annexed. There are now two Centers of Trade in the mighty Orissan Empire!

Also, stab hits 0. We cede a core province to China, who asked for it in the treaty to get them off our backs.

1471: Tibet declares war on Orissa. Hundreds of thousands die besieging mountains and the secret fortresses beneath. Sped on by the heroic death of half of the nation’s youth (to be replenished in time for 73) there is an exceptional year, which reduces inflation to 17%.

1473: we annex Assam, thus giving us a land border with China.

Oh, joy.
Hundreds of thousand of troops pour over the border. In desperation, I cede them the northern province of Assam.

1475: Timurids declare war again.

1477: Timurids cede me a bunch of useless provinces, which then revolt back to their control. Also, there is now a land border with Malacca. The 3rd center of trade will join the Orissan Empire soon enough.

1478: All of Southeast Asia is at war with me. Fortunately, the one province leaders of their alliance quickly see the error of their ways, and bring peae between us.

Orissa is at peace for one day, before….

Tibet, with an army of two men on yaks, declares war on us. With its loyal ally China, of course.

1479: Another 30 thousand men die before Tibet is annexed. Colonization of The Indies begins.

Next ten years were pretty boring, so I’ll sum it up:

War exhaustion hits 6%. We finally get a grip on southeast Asia, and make progress in the Indies. Malacca is annexed, so we now have 3 cots and a navy of 80 warships. Because all Muslim cit states have 80 warships.

Finally, peace. Of a sort. Timurid Empire and I spend 30 years tossing the provinces along the Indus back and forth, but since they, China, and the Uzbek Khanate are my only foes, I’m (more or less) at peace. Due to the distances and massive armadas, I set my sights on securing the East Indies. Once that’s odne, I can focus on the Chinese.

Oddly enough, the Timurids offered me Ishafan, despite there being only a +10% for myself. Being a kind patron of trade, I accept. The province then goes up in arms, and requires 20 thousand troops to hold it.

1526: This time, I decide to push war all against China and Japan (who has a core province).

Part of the reason for this was due to the
Unfortunately, I hit the wrong button and accept the province of Shadong for peace.

1535: War again. My 300 thousand troops are smashed by China’s 500 thousand troops. How are they affording this manpower?

Fortunately, I can send my troops into their allies and transport 80k troops to Nippon. Once those two are out of the game, I’ll turn my concentration on China.

Hopefully.

So let’s see. The initial army is smashed in China, but the Chagatai Khanate is overwhelmed rather quickly. Now I await D Day, when my heroic 50 thousand men will storm the beaches of Japan and make them a one province minor.




The World in 1536
 

unmerged(6777)

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If you right click, select properties, and then paste the url there into your address line then you'll see a very scary picture!

Great work Faeelin. You're gonna do it!
 

Faeelin

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Originally posted by MrT
If you right click, select properties, and then paste the url there into your address line then you'll see a very scary picture!

Great work Faeelin. You're gonna do it!

Don't be so sure. I dont' think I'll have China and Manchu off the map until the dawn of the 17th century, which leaves only two hundred nineteen years to conquer a land route (and effectively the world) in order to get to germany.
 

Peter Ebbesen

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Originally posted by Faeelin


Don't be so sure. I dont' think I'll have China and Manchu off the map until the dawn of the 17th century, which leaves only two hundred nineteen years to conquer a land route (and effectively the world) in order to get to germany.

That's certainly doable. One century to get ready to attack Europe (cleaning up the middle East and/or attacking the Americas) and one one to take Europe, Africa, and leftovers.

You will succeed.
 

Faeelin

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Hmm. Now the question is how to deal with China, who has the highest landtech in the world (and still in the chinese tech group).
I have the respectable land tech of 3.

They have 13.

Suggestions, professor and fellow students?