Transylvania

[Range]

TRANSYLVANIA

ENTRY: NONE

IT appeared when Range was planning on taking out Austria once and for all...THE BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!

The program that is usual seen here is temporarily postponed until further notice. Stay Tuned...the patient is not dead, yet...

All doctors to the emergency room...STAT!

I'm worried. Is it a problem with the PC or game or what?

Both...can't play...can't repair...can't reload...and, the computer has major issues.

But, the pc isn't dead.

 

[King_Richard_XI]

Both...can't play...can't repair...can't reload...and, the computer has major issues.

But, the pc isn't dead.

As with all good AARs, the world is against them.
I can only hope it all works out.

 

[blsteen]

Both...can't play...can't repair...can't reload...and, the computer has major issues.

But, the pc isn't dead.

Well, this isn't good.

 

[Ashantai]

Noooo! And I just came back and this was on the list!

I hope you can recover it!

 

[Johan11]

Daym!

 

[Range]

As with all good AARs, the world is against them.
I can only hope it all works out.

Specialists are on the case...

Well, this isn't good.

And, I had been looking forward to another AAR...a country had already been picked out.

Noooo! And I just came back and this was on the list!

I hope you can recover it!

So, do I. Welcome back!

Daym!

You can say that again.

 

[morningSIDEr]

Worrying stuff indeed. I was hoping for an update and instead get this bad news! I've had quite a bit of PC troubles over the last year myself, so I hope everything gets sorted out at your end and Range returns to resume prodding buttock again soon.

 

[Johan11]

Well, then, seeing as I have permission:

DAAAAAAAAAAAYM!!!!!!!

 

[Range]

Worrying stuff indeed. I was hoping for an update and instead get this bad news! I've had quite a bit of PC troubles over the last year myself, so I hope everything gets sorted out at your end and Range returns to resume prodding buttock again soon.

I'll need help. HELP!

Well, then, seeing as I have permission:

DAAAAAAAAAAAYM!!!!!!!

Help is on the way.

 

[Range]

TRANSYLVANIA

The patient is holding on ...as the specialists have arrived just in the nick of
time...

ENTRY: Part One – The Specialists

Moments after the problem had been discovered, Range, Alina and the others had been pulled back up line ... Range was furious..

RANGE: Why did you have to pull us out?

WALCOTT: There was nothing else we could do...when we discovered the problem it was all we could do just to retrieve you ...we couldn't leave anyone trapped back in time not knowing if the problem could be corrected ...you should thank your lucky stars we were able to locate you two and bring you all back at all. As you remember, WE weren't the ones that sent you on this journey in the first place.

RANGE: Well, what happened...can the transference machine be fixed?

WALCOTT: I don't know. It's pretty serious. I've sent for the best three specialists in the world.

In the Facility's lobby three men have just arrived. They had been asked to take a seat and they are just waiting for some kind of interview.

They are the three stooges…Curly, Larry and Moe. They had come looking for work and they’re not expected.

Curly has removed one of his shoes. His toes are sticking out the worn end of the sock. He's scratching the bottom of his foot. Moe seeing his antics is mad.

MOE: What are you ...(konks Curly on the top the head) do you want these people to think we're morons?

LARRY: Yeah, we need a job...

MOE: Say, when was the last time you changed those socks?

CURLY: Last Thursday ...I moved the left sock to the right and the right
sock to the left.

Moe hits Curly over the head again.

MOE: Go on ...put your shoe back on.

LARRY: (sad) I wish Shemp was here ...


Angel second-class Shemp is standing near by. He’s invisible to everyone in the room.

SHEMP: What do you think the guy upstairs will you let you three clowns go it alone… Just who do you think has been watching over you guys all these years?

SECRETARY: (on phone) Mr. Walcott...the specialists have arrived.

Larry looks about and sees they are the only people waiting. He leans over to Moe and whispers.

LARRY: Say, Moe, does she mean us?

MOE: That we're specialists?

SECRETARY: You three can go in now.

CURLY: She does mean us...nyuk, nyuk, nyuk...

MOE: Come on let's not keep the boss waiting.

The Three Stooges hurry past the secretary.

CURLY: Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo!

SHEMP: (To self) It's a good thing I'm watching over you guys ...otherwise there would be no one to keep you monkeys out of trouble.

 

[King_Richard_XI]

Let's hope the Stooges can cure your game.

 

[Range]

Let's hope the Stooges can cure your game.

They are my heroes.

 

[Range]

TRANSYLVANIA

The patient is holding on ...

Part Two - The cure is sometimes painful. ..

Moe, Curly and Larry were left alone to work on the patient.

LARRY: Well, what are we suppose to do?

CURLY: Yeah ...they're counting on us...nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.

MOE: Well, first I guess we'll have to open up the patient and see what's what ...spread out boys and find something to open her up.

LARRY: I'll see if there's a saw around here.

CURLY: And, I'll look for a sledge hammer.

MOE: Good thinking (looks at pc) now, let me see.

Shemp is standing beside an operating computer.

Larry, looking for a saw comes right to the working computer, finding nothing to open the PC he turns away.

SHEMP: You moron the answer is right in front of your face and you didn't
even see it. Well, I outta…second thought what’s stopping me?

Shemp gives Larry a swift kick in the pants which makes Larry turn around to who see who had kicked him. But, Larry sees no one.

LARRY: Hey, what gives!

Larry, having turned around spies the working computer instead.

LARRY: Hey, Moe come here ...

Moe joins Larry.

LARRY: (cont) This computer is working ...maybe we can use some parts
from this computer and put it in the bad one to fix it.

Moe begins slapping Larry on the forehead.

MOE: That’s using your noddle..

Larry staggers for a moment.

LARRY: Hey not so hard.

MOE: (To Curly) Hey lamebrain ...open up this computer and take
everything out of it.

CURLY: Okay ...but, how do I open it. I couldn't find a sludge hammer.

MOE: This one has thumb screws you moron ...just turn them and maybe then you can take the cover off.

LARRY: What about me ...what do I do?

Moe takes hold of Larry hair and he begins pulling him along.

MOE: Come here…you're coming with me, maybe then the two us and figure out how to open up the patient.

Once, Curly has the computer opened he begins pulling out the wires. One wire is very long and he begins pulling it hand over fist.

CURLY: Ladidi ...ladida ...

Finding the process very frustrating, Curly rubs his face before he barks at the cable. Noticing a scissor on the table he uses it to cut the cable.

CURLY: Nyuk ...Nyuk ...Nyuk.

 

[morningSIDEr]

Good stuff. Certainly an original method for repairing a PC. If they can get a large enough sledge hammer, it will likely work too!

 

[King_Richard_XI]

Hm, if this works I may just hire them to fix my old XP.

 

[Range]

Good stuff. Certainly an original method for repairing a PC. If they can get a large enough sledge hammer, it will likely work too!

The Stooges did it!

Hm, if this works I may just hire them to fix my old XP.

I'm sending them right over.

 

[blsteen]

I'm sending them right over.

Good luck with that!

 

[Range]

Good luck with that!

After the Stooges...how could I fail? I have an angel on my shoulder.

 

[Range]

TRANSLYVANIA

ENTRY 55

The operation was a success. The stooges did it. The boys couldn’t believe all the zeros on the check for so little work.

A moment later, the real computer repairmen arrived. The boys had scrammed.

CURLY: Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo!

Back to the AAR

Range arrived back down line just in time to lead the attack. The strange thing about wars, all too often the real objective is just a side note at the offset Range couldn’t, or wouldn’t come right out and declare war on Austria. Instead, Transylvania went to war with an ally of Austria…which brought Austria into the war.


AUSTRIA

November 1739

Vienna was the last stronghold of a once great Empire.

The light was going out in ore than one way.

King Charles III the second son of Leopold VI had less than a year to live.

Queen Maria Theresa the heir to the throne would never wear the crown.

Prussia was the fall guy…

Oh, Range’s Vassals were often stronger then their enemies.

Yes, they fell as well.

It wasn’t Brandenburg’s time, but it wouldn't be long before they fell to Range's armies. As for Austria's Maria Theresa's, even after King Charles III died a few months after the war, the twenty-three year little heiress would never gain her crown.

 

[morningSIDEr]

The operation was a success. The stooges did it. The boys couldn’t believe all the zeros on the check for so little work.

I'm never going to PCWorld again. Next time my PC stops working, the Stooges will be brought in! Quite glad that Austria is going to be finally dealt with and very glad that your PC is now up and running once more. I'm afraid to say, however, that it seems as if your screenshots are not working.