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Throne

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Why does it say "divine comedy" do they make fun of religion or is it religious jokes? I am confused
During the Renaissance when it was written, a comedy just meant a story that had a happy ending. See? Shakespeare pops up everywhere!
 

canonized

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Throne said:
During the Renaissance when it was written, a comedy just meant a story that had a happy ending. See? Shakespeare pops up everywhere!
This is correct XD
 

comagoosie

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Throne said:
During the Renaissance when it was written, a comedy just meant a story that had a happy ending. See? Shakespeare pops up everywhere!
Gah, and I just had 9 weeks of just shakespeare. You would of think I would of remembered that.

So correct me if I am wrong, but didn't almost all the comedies end in marriage and all the tragedies ended in death. Does this mean that Timelines is going to end with a marriage...or is this going to be a tragedy and everyone is going to die...I don't know which I perfer :D
 

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comagoosie said:
Gah, and I just had 9 weeks of just shakespeare. You would of think I would of remembered that.

So correct me if I am wrong, but didn't almost all the comedies end in marriage and all the tragedies ended in death. Does this mean that Timelines is going to end with a marriage...or is this going to be a tragedy and everyone is going to die...I don't know which I perfer :D
Now there is the 5 dollar question XD . Who knows , it could be a Tragicomedy like the Winter's Tale XD
 

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You’ve Been Canonized: Kaixxor​

Greetings and welcome once again to this week’s You’ve Been Canonized! our weekly interview segment here on Timelines where we get to know more about a patron author , their thoughts on Timelines , and what’s new with their current AAR or project ! If you’re new to the programme , I’m your host , canonized , author of Timelines: What if Spain Failed to Control the World? and today’s guest is one of our newest friends Kaixxor author of We AAR All Doomed! A Terribly Odd Prussia AAR. Let’s get to the questions !

Part I: The Man and His Dog
Kaixxor sheds some light on himself !

canonized: so first , if you could introduce yourself to our audience , tell us a little bit about yourself ^^

Kaixxor: Well, my name ist Kaixxor, I'm 16 years old, I live in the US of A, and... Well... Uh... I've taken a turn from ultra-shooty action to games where I must think, and it disturbs my video-game playing family greatly. Starting with GalCiv 2, then going to Paradox Games and more realistic combat sims such as Armed Assault.

canonized: Growing up with games and a gaming family , how did you also come to start writing AARs ?

Kaixxor: Well. Let's see. I guess I'll start with my gaming family. When I was about 6 I always watched my dad play Mech Warrior on his PC and Doom on the N64 (Best way to raise a child). My sister and I would always compete in our new games, and the first game that we were really 'good' at was a little-known title called Empires: Dawn of the Modern World. Later on I would get involved in Warhammer and play with my sister's boyfriend and I would write battle reports and post them on various sites (Relic Forums was one I remember having a great reception). So pretty much I stumbled across the Paradox AARs while surfing through the Epic Paradox Megathread on Something Awful, and I thought, "Hey, I could do that!"

canonized: So your writing style is a comedic one . Why this style in particular as oppossed to most AARs which are just straight up gameplay or narrative or history ?

Kaixxor: Ya wanna know the truth? CAN YOU HANDLE THE TRUTH? I just don't think I could garner the patience required to write any other style, I suppose if I wanted to I could write a narrative/story, but I would have to really put my mind to it and say "Okay, now you gotta sit down and type this sonovagun for the next two hours". It's not something I would picture myself having fun doing, and for me I want to do something that's fun and will make other people laugh, and hey, I can always try my hand at something new in the middle of an AAR, for example, my last two updates? I put a header on them saying "THIS AR SERIUS POST."

canonized: So I think all of the fans of your work would like for you to also tell us a little bit about your 'best friend' , don't you think ?

Kaixxor: Oh Kaiser? Heh. I suppose so. Thing is I don't know if they have proven their loyalty. Gonna have to overthrow some governments, ya know? Well, Kaiser... Kaiser Kaiser Kaiser, what is to be said about the Kaiser? Well, we got him from a puppy adoption center, the only info we got on his lineage is that his mother was a german sheppard, and we saw his feet and thought 'Corgi!' And Kaiser is quite possibly the most odd little creature ever. He has a ton of personality. He's a sassy little jerk and he wants everyone to know that he lives up to his name. Originally we were going through names and we thought up names such as "Gunter" and other such rediculous names, but then he barked at us... And that bark, it was the most dignified little bark ever coming out of this puppy. It was the "You peasants! I amt die Kaiser von Georgia!" bark. And we knew he should be ze Kaiser. Hmmm... He also enjoys destroying those little bobo toys from the petsmart commercials. And he likes watching the History Channel too. Mostly when there are Panzers on screen.

canonized: As someone who's also one of the relatively new people arriving in AARland ,what's your impressions of it ?

Kaixxor: I suppose you mean 'Ridiculously New'... It's a nice community, very mature, very smart. These people know what they're talking about. And the best part is that they love history and that they can have a sense of humor!

canonized: Would you share with us your greatest satisfaction and your greatest challenge when it comes to your own particular writing ?

Kaixxor: Well, I've got to say, after I finished We AAR All Doomed! I got a PM from one of my common readers, essentially thanking me for writing it and saying that I did a great job with a writing style that was not common on the forums. This of course made me feel all warm and fuzzy on the insides. The greatest challenge is definitely thinking up new jokes. And you can't imagine how frustrating it is to think up this great joke 5 hours in advance and go "THIS IS GONNA RULE!" And then some little remark you made at the last minute gets all of the attention. Example: Kaiser says: "You haft not seen battle until you haft seen Verdun!" Everyone tackles that with ferocity, and this one joke that I had thought up and that I thought was hilarious isn't speculated upon. Not that I'm complaining, though.

Part II: Panzers for our Kaisers
Let’s see what Kaixxor thinks of Timelines !

canonized: So as a new reader to Timelines , would you share with us some of your initial impressions ?

Kaixxor: My first impression in quotations: "Jeez, I could never sit down to write this" It's insane how you could sit down and think up all these characters and all of these seperate story lines to coexist with your game. Also: PANZERKARDINAL IZ THE BEST. Also: If you don't like PanzerKardinal you are a communist. A filthy filthy communist not fit to be conquered by Espana

canonized: Haha , the Cardinal's a very popular character and he's definitely very fun to write of XD . Being a narrative AAR and obviously you coming from a comedy AAR standpoint , how does the difference affect you and how does it feel to be reading a narrative like this ?

Kaixxor: Whoo, well, I've definately got to sit down and read this. It's very different from a comedy AAR, you could probably read one of my updates in 10 minutes, for this type of AAR you have to set aside at least a half hour for a single chapter. It's very interesting and I thought to myself "Ya know, if my fans don't mind, I'd totally write one of these!" And "If I wasn't so damn impatient I'd write one of these!"

canonized: Although it is usually a serious work , we do try to add some fun bits and pieces into Timelines . Any comments on the Easter eggs we like leaving around for the readers ?

Kaixxor: Oh, the internet Memes! Dear God! I groaned out loud at the Japan chapter when Antonio says, "You are on the path to destruction!" When you see some of those Easter Eggs you just go "Oh God, I'm a hopeless Internet geek" Also: Just so you know, I've taken to shouting "WE ARE THE MONARCHY!"

canonized: XD we're glad to deliver . As for regular serious elements of the story so far , any particular portion you enjoyed ?

Kaixxor: As you know: PanzerKardinal. A lot of the Japanese campaign was fascinating and it was very accurate when it came to Japanese politics, I thought that you hit all of the right notes with the hostage taking in Japan, which is a very nice detail, since taking a hostage in Shogunate Japan is very different from any other situation, since a hostage tended not to be treated unfairly. So yeah, I liked that. I enjoyed a lot of the espionage and the maze in Mecca

canonized: So the length must have been a factor . Some people like the non-stop chapters and dread catching up while some people get intimidated by it . Any comments on that ?

Kaixxor: Well, it definitely was intimidating, seeing how long these chapters were. And it’s two freaking books worth of text, so it's not like you're going to catch up soon, so you might as well take your time.

canonized: Any thoughts on the 'modern day' interludes after each chapter ?

Kaixxor: I think it's a really great take on an alternate modern world "Hispania Universalis" is a great touch, and I enjoy how you tie together both the past events with the future events.

canonized: Lastly for this section , any guesses on what the Timepiece is ?
Kaixxor: ZE END OF ZE WORLD. That's it. It's our doom. It's the Martians in a time capsule.

Part III: Speaking of Doom…
Kaixxor shares with us some things about his now finished AAR and his new one !

canonized: So Vicky comedies are relatively rare as was already pointed out by one of your readers . Could you take us a little bit behind the scenes and explain how you came up with an idea to make a Vicky narrative about Prussia/Germany ?

Kaixxor: Hmm, well, I had the idea for a while, and I wanted to include Kaiser in the narrative, so why not do an AAR on his home land? (not including those crumpet eaters from his corgi half)

canonized: Haha . Naturally , Kaiser is a big part of the comedic action often stealing the show even from you . How did you come up with such an insane yet memorable character ?

Kaixxor: Now, I have to blame my family, in particular my big sister for that. Now, we labeled the living room Germany. And we labeled our foyer Poland, and the deck is Russia and the dining room is France. So when Kaiser is rushing around any of those areas we shout out "Kaiser is invading *insert country here*!" The rest writes itself really, we had an entire personality we put with Kaiser, and he's not complaining, he's playing along with it!

canonized: Before moving away from Kaiser , I just have to mention the various pictures he is inserted with in the AAR and one especially that I won't give away for any of your future readers but encapsulates his true essence . How has it been working with the graphics on the work ?

Kaixxor: Eh, it's alright, I thought I could use more pictures of Kaiser, but hey, I'll improve, and the first step is getting like, 10 more pictures of Kaiser on my computer. And I could definately improve on graphics too. Darn you timelines and your awesome graphics!

canonized: XD , Coupled with the comedic banter , there's also the backdrop of a rapidly coalescing Germanic nation . Could you talk to us a little bit about the gameplay element of your AAR and how that went ?

Kaixxor: Hmm, that's a toughy... Well, I originally just wanted to unite Germany, but I knew, I just knew... Every German under the sun had to be united... And then? Everyone needed to be united under the Germans. So really? The Gameplay is constant war and just a little on the historic events. In the end I add my own little bit of "History!" and Narrative AAR for flavor.

canonized: So now that your AAR is over , you've went through so elements all the way from witty commentary , to pseudo serious dialogue , to even taking key readers and putting them as Generals . What could you say to your fans and to those who may want to read this completed work ?

Kaixxor: Well: To my fans: Thank you for reading this and supporting me through this whole thing. And to new readers? Buckle your seatbelts and keep your hands and feet in the cart at all times! This ride goes through several swift turns at high speeds! And ending once again with the fans because they need more text: YOU GUYS RULE! My fans are the reason I do this, and I just couldn't go on without somebody saying we need Dr. Who to counter my megalomaniac puppy.

canonized: Although this AAR is finished you're already starting a new one . Could you tell the readers a little bit about this new AAR you've begun ?

Kaixxor: Well, after consulting my fans, I've decided that Kaiser will continue on into the WWII era. Except in this timeline WWI never happened, "Germany" is a bastion of Democracy and England is full of fascists. So pretty much? Flip the governments around, except in the US, who support Germany and have taken part of France as the "United States French Colonies".

canonized: And naturally , we can expect Kaiser to create some havoc of course ! Perhaps we could give him the last word ?

Kaiser: Oft course! I vould like to say, zat ift you do not canonize Kaixxor zen Spain will meet an unfortunate end, und to all oft mein fans: I luft zat you adore me, und I can expect you to serve me loyally in the AARs to come!

canonized: We thank both of our guests (gosh , was it just me or did we get some Kurt_Steiner déjà vu in here too XD) and hope that everyone’s enjoyed this interview ! Next week will be the AARlander edition of You’ve Been Canonized where we’ll feature Lord Durham who will talk about modship and AARland . Please look forward to reading that ! Also please keep Kaixxor and me in mind you go vote in the AARland Choice AwAARds so please go vote now !
 

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Excellent interview once again - and a beautiful set of closing remarks coming from Kaiser! Kaixxor, you really should get that dog an honorary monocle! :rofl:
 

canonized

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General_BT said:
Excellent interview once again - and a beautiful set of closing remarks coming from Kaiser! Kaixxor, you really should get that dog an honorary monocle! :rofl:
Thank you XD Glad you enjoyed it !
 

Woody Man

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Ah good to see Kaixxor interviewed, and good to see another fan of the Japan chapters!
 

Grubnessul

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canonized said:
Now there is the 5 dollar question XD . Who knows , it could be a Tragicomedy like the Winter's Tale XD
They'll have pizza together ;)

And General Grubby does a world conquest.
 

Throne

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They'll have pizza together

And General Grubby does a world conquest.
And then they all die in a freak solar flare that melts the polar ice caps.
 

comagoosie

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canonized said:
Now there is the 5 dollar question XD . Who knows , it could be a Tragicomedy like the Winter's Tale XD
sweet $5 question for the win!

Anyways nice interview, but there was no third part. I sense a mystery... :D

A dog that likes to watch panzers :eek: Where did you get him!
 

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You know, I always wondered where these canonized interviews were... now I know. :D
 

canonized

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English Patriot said:
Ah good to see Kaixxor interviewed, and good to see another fan of the Japan chapters!
We'll see Japan again before the AAR's out , friends :D

Grubnessul: XD Won't expect anything less of General Grubby !

Throne: So long as Costner isn't involved XD

comagoosie: Now i'm curious about that too XD

Jestor: Yep XD
 

unmerged(59077)

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Turns out I'm a filthy communist not fit to be conquered by Espana. That is excellent news, I don't like being conquered.
 

canonized

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RGB said:
Turns out I'm a filthy communist not fit to be conquered by Espana. That is excellent news, I don't like being conquered.
ROFL ROFL SO IT WOULD SEEM !
 

Woody Man

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canonized said:
We'll see Japan again before the AAR's out , friends :D



Throne: So long as Costner isn't involved XD
Yes! Back to Japan!


And yes, keep Costner out of it :eek:
 

canonized

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English Patriot said:
Yes! Back to Japan!


And yes, keep Costner out of it :eek:
Unfortunately I don't think we'll get to "Past" Japan until the 1700s XD
 

unmerged(59077)

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1700s? Isn't that when giant robots beat everyone into interconnected dreaming goo, Tokyo Tower becomes the centre of the world and Nobunaga rises from the dead to summon some daemons for Musashi to fight?

Sounds like the perfect time to revisit the place.
 

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How are you a filthy communist?
 

comagoosie

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RGB said:
1700s? Isn't that when giant robots beat everyone into interconnected dreaming goo, Tokyo Tower becomes the centre of the world and Nobunaga rises from the dead to summon some daemons for Musashi to fight?

Sounds like the perfect time to revisit the place.
Yup all those things happened in the 1700's, let's not forgot Godzilla appears for the first time ;)