The Westminster System - A British Interactive AAR

[DensleyBlair]

Must be a good friday thing.

The Good Friday Agreement of course being that where we agreed not to clutter the thread with inane British ramblings.

 

[99KingHigh]

"We"?

Official Manifesto of the Neo-Feudalist Murderous Party of Imperialism.

I. The United Kingdom is to be divided into a series of urban and agrarian private communities, administrated by specific houses and members of the English Nobility.
II. All titular holdings are vassals to His Most Divine Ruler, by the Grace of God, of Great Britain, Ireland and the British Dominions beyond the Seas Queen, Defender of the Faith, Duchess of Edinburgh, Countess of Merioneth, Baroness Greenwich, Duke of Lancaster, Lord of Mann, Duke of Normandy, Sovereign of the Most Honourable Order of the Garter, Sovereign of the Most Honourable Order of the Bath, Sovereign of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Thistle, Sovereign of the Most Illustrious Order of Saint Patrick, Sovereign of the Most Distinguished Order of Saint Michael and Saint George, Sovereign of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire, Sovereign of the Distinguished Service Order, Sovereign of the Imperial Service Order, Sovereign of the Most Exalted Order of the Star of India, Sovereign of the Most Eminent Order of the Indian Empire, Sovereign of the Order of British India, Sovereign of the Indian Order of Merit, Sovereign of the Order of Burma, Sovereign of the Royal Order of Victoria and Albert, Sovereign of the Royal Family Order of King Edward VII, Sovereign of the Order of Merit, Sovereign of the Order of the Companions of Honour, Sovereign of the Royal Victorian Order, Sovereign of the Most Venerable Order of the Hospital of St John of Jerusalem, and Emperor of all overseas territories.
III. All other composite classes of society (excluding the Jews) are divided into two categories (excluding the Jews), those whom are bound to the land, and those whom are bound to the Kingdom - otherwise known as Free Men. A substantial price (to the Jews) must be payed to achieve the latter status.
V. His Majesty, by the Grace of God, of Great Britain, Ireland and the British Dominions beyond the Seas Queen, Defender of the Faith, Duchess of Edinburgh, Countess of Merioneth, Baroness Greenwich, Duke of Lancaster, Lord of Mann, Duke of Normandy, Sovereign of the Most Honourable Order of the Garter, Sovereign of the Most Honourable Order of the Bath, Sovereign of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Thistle, Sovereign of the Most Illustrious Order of Saint Patrick, Sovereign of the Most Distinguished Order of Saint Michael and Saint George, Sovereign of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire, Sovereign of the Distinguished Service Order, Sovereign of the Imperial Service Order, Sovereign of the Most Exalted Order of the Star of India, Sovereign of the Most Eminent Order of the Indian Empire, Sovereign of the Order of British India, Sovereign of the Indian Order of Merit, Sovereign of the Order of Burma, Sovereign of the Royal Order of Victoria and Albert, Sovereign of the Royal Family Order of King Edward VII, Sovereign of the Order of Merit, Sovereign of the Order of the Companions of Honour, Sovereign of the Royal Victorian Order, Sovereign of the Most Venerable Order of the Hospital of St John of Jerusalem, and Emperor of all overseas territories - is the unquestioned absolute authority of the British Isles.
IV. Church and State are inseparable, bound together by title and appointment.

The Principles of the Party​

1. Communists (or in medical terms, Satanic Blood-wearing baby killers) are to be viewed on a level equivalent, if not below, rat meat. Thus, all Communists are either to be hung, or cooked as rat food.
2. Women are by nature, Communists. Should they dwell beyond the confines of the man's demesne, they are to be viewed as Communist traitors.
3. Wigs are illegal. Liberals are illegal. Both are Communists.
4. Anything in Sheffield or Leeds, is Communist.
5. The United Kingdom, as the chosen people, have the right to extend their boundaries with divine endorsement. All of Africa, North America, and Asia are territories belonging to His Majesty. Antarctica, is Communist, especially the Imperial Penguins.
6. Anything French is to be banned on grounds of treason.
7. The proper pronunciation of the word "reform" - is - "trēzən".
8. Scotland is thenceforth absorbed and divided into the constituent counties under the Duchy of Cornwall.
9. Ireland does not exist. Believing its existence is treason and/or communist, depending on the day.
10. Winston Churchill's political views are perceived as barely legal - they were far too leftist.
11. Because all worthy individuals go to heaven, medication will only be provided for the aristocracy - everyone below them can simply enjoy the afterlife - but the nobility must carry the burden of administration for their inferiors. This is why medication is restricted to their persons.
12. Our only ally is Texas.
13. We endorse the brilliant Utopian slogan of George Orwell, "War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, Ignorance is Strength." In all other regards, George Orwell is a Whiggist Commie Female.

 

[DensleyBlair]

I can't obey anyone who misuses "whom".

 

[99KingHigh]

I can't obey anyone who misuses "whom".

14. We abuse "whom."

 

[LordTempest]

14. We abuse "whom."

15. And the ten-line limit for signatures, repeatedly.

 

[Contravarius]

Well, I for one welcome my new fellow faction members.
We disagree on a few things (mostly jews), but I hope we can look past our differences and bring all the dirty lefties to their knees.

 

[Enewald]

Isn't our nobility from France? Including many of our words? Duke of Normandy?

Actually, the funny thing is that humans by nature are the most fervent supporters of personal property, and thus cannot be truly good communists. They are by nature selfish, like most men, but even more so when it comes to THEIR children, (MY BABY!); something that does not have much common with the communist ideals of 'common' ownership (some social-anarchist proposed earlier in this thread that children are private property of their parents).
Communism is in itself revolt against human nature. It is a noble venture, but something bound to fail and end in tears of the prisoners of gulags, or parents eating their children as in the case of China.
Yes, you can say it has never been 'successfully tried' anywhere, the 100.000.000 more or less buried bodies thank heartedly for being allowed to be a part of the experimentation.

 

[DensleyBlair]

14. We abuse "whom."

The irony, of course, being that, sans the speech marks and with a question mark, that would be a perfectly valid question.

 

[LordTempest]

or parents eating their children as in the case of China.

So when do you plan on immigrating to China?

 

[99KingHigh]

So when do you plan on immigrating to China?

*Also known as the Manchester colony.

 

[DensleyBlair]

*Also known as the Manchester colony.

There's an Aberdeen in Hong Kong, so that might be more appropriate.

 

[LordTempest]

There's an Aberdeen in Hong Kong, so that might be more appropriate.

We would never condone cannibalism in HM's colonies.

 

[99KingHigh]

We would never condone cannibalism in HM's colonies.

Unless we were eating Reds.

 

[Andrzej I]

Poll-Pole update!

Total Vote: 51

Tories (Rightist): 16
Tories (One Nation): 2
Nat Libs: 5
Liberals (Yellow): 11
Liberals (Orange): 4
Labour: 6
CPGB: 7

%s:
Tories: 35.3%
Nat Libs: 9.8%
Liberals: 29.4%
Labour: 11.8%
CPGB: 13.7%

Weighted:
Tories: 54
Nat Libs: 1.25
Liberals: 30
Labour: 3
CPGB: 3.5

Seats:
Tories: 364
Nat Libs: 8
Liberals: 202
Labour: 20
CPGB: 24

Result: Tory Majority

Though we currently hold a Conservative and Unionist Party majority parliament, any one vote for a non-Tory party will see that advantage struck, and back into a hung parliament we would go. A vote for the Nat Libs might end up giving a Tory-Nat Lib-UUP coalition parliament, and it would definitely bolster them back above 10%. Either way, though, it definitely appears we have our two major parties for a while, with a CPGB third party (what with its dedicated voters guaranteed to give it at least 10% of the vote).

---

Referendum
Yes - 21
No - 24

 

[LordTempest]

Clearly, more people need to vote Labour.

 

[NikephorosSonar]

I'm assuming that this means 2 Tory parties? And one of them STILL won the vote?

Where did the Red Paradoxians disappear to?

 

[Contravarius]

I'm assuming that this means 2 Tory parties? And one of them STILL won the vote?

Where did the Red Paradoxians disappear to?

((It's this new fancy faction system. Read all about it in the introduction. Did you vote, btw?))

 

[LordTempest]

I'm assuming that this means 2 Tory parties? And one of them STILL won the vote?

Those are only inter-party factions; there is only one Tory Party.

Where did the Red Paradoxians disappear to?

They're still here and sill stupidly voting Bolshie when they're not busy trying to help the Tories achieve an overall majority.

 

[atomicsoda]

I'm assuming that this means 2 Tory parties? And one of them STILL won the vote?

Where did the Red Paradoxians disappear to?

One Conservative Party, two factions.

Looks like we are going to have a PM Macmillan. One Nation in 10 Downing St.

 

[Contravarius]

They're still here and sill stupidly voting Bolshie when they're not busy trying to help the Tories achieve an overall majority.

How's that chessgame of yours going?