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Enewald

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((Thougt about something interesting. What if Dieng Xiaoping don't become economic minister? And that not he but a sociaøist/communist take over after Mao? Would be intersting if China stayed commited to socialism and didn't liberalize their markets.))
They remain poor and isolated?
The more interesting question is what will be the fate of Hong Kong in this AAR.
And what are the chances of Britain entering a true big war?
 

John Forseti

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The more interesting question is what will be the fate of Hong Kong in this AAR.
If we get that far then likely the same as in real history, handed over to the PRC at the end of the terms of the lease/treaty.
 

ThaHoward

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They remain poor and isolated?
The more interesting question is what will be the fate of Hong Kong in this AAR.
And what are the chances of Britain entering a true big war?
Yes, it will lead to interesting things concerning Vietnam, economy, relations to the west, to the USSR and if foreign investors and so on will invest in China.

It might as well lead to the destruction of China. And alternatively, what if a liberal-democrat arise? Then the incident during of the government vs. students may have never happened. Or it would go into chaos. Who knows?
 
Last edited:

Tommy4ever

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((Thougt about something interesting. What if Dieng Xiaoping don't become economic minister? And that not he but a sociaøist/communist take over after Mao? Would be intersting if China stayed commited to socialism and didn't liberalize their markets.))
Whilst its a question for much later in the AAR, I do think it would be an interesting route for it to take - especially if we end up with a Maoist group in the UK!

The more interesting question is what will be the fate of Hong Kong in this AAR.
And what are the chances of Britain entering a true big war?
No way of knowing for sure with either question. If we get involved in a really big war its obviously going to be the war which would involve thermonuclear war!

I've started writing the election update, so it will be up either today or tomorrow. :)
 

Enewald

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Why would we have Maoist in Britain? :eek:
No one can be that insane. Especially now that people know about the great crimes of Stalin, and with the greatest famine of history about the begin in China. Mao has committed the greatest crimes against mankind, especially against his own people.
Someone being a 'Maoist' is as obnoxious as someone saying they are 'Hitlerist'...
 

Contravarius

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Someone being a 'Maoist' is as obnoxious as someone saying they are 'Hitlerist'...
*Dom Contravarius coughs furiously*

((Joke!

Edit: Also, isn't a more stalinist China a possibility? Like, a CCCP puppet as opposed to this painfully independent People's Republic?))
 
Last edited:

LordTempest

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Why would we have Maoist in Britain? :eek:
*sigh* Another one of Enewald's famous "why isn't everyone exactly the same as I am ?!" tirades...

Because they're actually were and are Maoists in Britain, just as there were and are fascists.
 

Dadarian

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*sigh* Another one of Enewald's famous "why isn't everyone exactly the same as I am ?!" tirades...

Because they're actually were and are Maoists in Britain, just as there were and are fascists.
People having opinions? No No NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
 

Scrapknight

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The only opinion that matters is that of the market. All others will be silenced.

(Some freedom they advocate, huh?)
 

DensleyBlair

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On a different note, I thought that My Rt. Hon. Friend from Devonport would be interested to know that I've just spent an afternoon being watched by a portrait of the Member for Birmingham West.
 

ThaHoward

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Why would we have Maoist in Britain? :eek:
No one can be that insane. Especially now that people know about the great crimes of Stalin, and with the greatest famine of history about the begin in China. Mao has committed the greatest crimes against mankind, especially against his own people.
Someone being a 'Maoist' is as obnoxious as someone saying they are 'Hitlerist'...
After the Mao and the communist came to power they actually influenced many young ones and students to become communists and socialists. It became for example several demonstrations, marches and so on because of it.

Hopefully though a Socialist China will be horrible for them ;)
 

ThaHoward

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On a different note, I thought that My Rt. Hon. Friend from Devonport would be interested to know that I've just spent an afternoon being watched by a portrait of the Member for Birmingham West.
The Rt. Hon. DensleyBlair, Viscount Blair of Dunny-on-the-Wold, I do not mean to interefere, but I am actually representing Norris Green and not St. Helens :)
 

DensleyBlair

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The Rt. Hon. DensleyBlair, Viscount Blair of Dunny-on-the-Wold, I do not mean to interefere, but I am actually representing Norris Green and not St. Helens :)
Consider it amended. :)
 

LordTempest

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The Rt. Hon. DensleyBlair, Viscount Blair of Dunny-on-the-Wold, I do not mean to interefere, but I am actually representing Norris Green and not St. Helens :)
Then you are a local councilor and not an MP. :p
 

Tommy4ever

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The Election of 1958

After eight years of Conservative-National Liberal Alliance led government, the collapse of that long lasting coalition of the Right had wafted the scent of blood the way of the Liberals and Labour. With the fall of the Alliance inevitably seriously weakening the chances of either the Tories or National Liberals remaining in government, the two main opposition parties both felt capable of, and indeed destined to, assumed leadership over the next government. The election threatened to be a desperately unpredictable affair.

Liberal Party


Political Position: Centre

Ideology: Social Liberalism

Description:

1954 marked a tremendous pinnacle in the influence of the Liberal Party – for a time during the election season it appeared that the Liberals might be swept to government with a majority in their own right. Instead they fell short in dozens of seats despite making incredible gains and were left in a sort of political limbo for the ensuing four years. Having emerged as the second largest party in parliament the Liberals were at once the leaders of the opposition and a force of government – Eden’s Alliance administration relying on the cooperation of the Liberals in parliament throughout its existence. None the less, British Liberalism continues to ride on the crest of a wave, threatening to storm the House of Commons and establish the first Liberal led government in decades.

Party Leader: Jo Grimond

The St Andrews born leader of the Liberal Party succeeded the venerated Archibald Sinclair in 1955. After serving as a major during the War, Grimond was elected as the MP for Orkney and Shetland in 1945 – participating as an aid to Sinclair when he served as Foreign Secretary from 1945-1948 before being promoted into the cabinet as a junior minister after the expulsion of the Communists from the Popular Front in 1948. Continuing to rise in prominence within the Liberal Party after the Alliance came to government in 1950 Grimond was virtually unchallenged when he moved to replace Sinclair as party leader in 1955.

Foreign Policy:

The Liberal Party remains as implacably opposed to Soviet expansionism today as it has been for more than a decade. Britain must stand firm alongside our Western allies against the aggressive impulses of Muscovite Communism. Since 1950 the United Nations has been moving slowly towards liquidation – the actions of our government only accelerating this decline. Our government, following the example set in Korea, has proved happy to totally disregard the validity of UN proclamations or champion them when it has suited it. Our decision to discredit this valuable institution risks banishing any hopes the world might have to establish a universally respected international law – a law that might act as a barrier to the spread of Communism just as potent as rifles and fighter jets. Britain must once again become the champion of international law and justice – preserving the United Nations and restoring its prestige through greater respect for the institution.

Britain is uniquely positioned within the free world as the point of linkage between its three main components – the United States, the British Commonwealth and Western Europe. The strengthening of ties with one part is certainly not mutually exclusive to the strengthening of ties with other parts of the free world – but only makes Britain a more attractive partner! Let us integrate with Europe, inviting the soon to be independent West German state into the European community, let us remain close to our Commonwealth and let us never waver from our link to the guardian of freedom – the United States of America.

Imperial Policy:

The Liberal Party demands that Britain remain responsive to any and all calls for self-government from her colonies. However we must not allow our withdrawal to be carried out in a chaotic fashion that risks leaving behind a legacy of violence. In future Britain shall support a more phased withdrawal and maintain close links with her former colonial subjects – offering military support for arbitration and economic support for development.

Northern Ireland:

The Liberal Party refuses to condone any negotiations with Republican terrorism, Britain shall not be blackmailed into any actions and her citizens shall be protected. The British government must guarantee its full support to the authorities in Northern Ireland combatting this menace. However, we must recognise that the Catholic minority in the province does have some genuine grievances that have hitherto gone unaddressed. The British government should therefore encourage the government of Northern Ireland to pursue internal reforms.

Domestic Policy:

The Liberal Party is unique in this country for supporting the unity social justice and individual freedom. Unlike the Conservative and National Liberal parties, pawn of industrialists and business owners, or the Communists, ruled from Moscow, or indeed the Labour Party, run by the Trade Unions, the Liberal Party stands independent as the only force in British politics responsible solely to its members and concerned solely with the betterment of all levels of society.

We defend the social security net provided by the welfare state, and the nationalised industries that have broken up pre-war monopolies but stand against further nationalisations that would encroach upon sectors of the economy best left to private interests. We support the rights of workers and encourage their participation in managing work places – but protect the rights of employers to modernise and expand industry in a way that shall allow us to return to full employment and restore our nation’s status as a world leader economically.

In response to the recession the Liberal Party advocates tax cuts as an encourage to spend, fuelling our industries, and invest whilst also supporting schemes aimed at enhancing the vibrancy of rural economies – thus encouraging people from crowded industrial cities where work is increasingly hard to come by into the country. The revival of the rural economy would leave our country in a stronger position economically overall. The Liberal Party also advocates a refocussing of government funds away from the shockingly large amounts currently used for Defence.

The Liberal Party unswervingly supports the cause of constitutional reform. Although amongst the freest and most democratic in the world – the British constitution retains numerous flaws that can and must be reformed! The Liberal Party calls for the abandonment of the anti-democratic and polarising ‘Westminster System’ and the adoption of Proportional Representation as many European nations have. PR is more conducive to compromise and stability, and a far more democratic system. The Liberal Party also strongly supports the formation of devolved parliaments in Scotland and Wales with full powers to deal with issues that affect these countries exclusively whilst the Westminster government continues to deal with national issues.

Conservative Party


Political Position: Centre-Right

Ideology: Conservatism

Description:

The Alliance minority governments of the past eight years were in large part dominated by the Conservative Party. After the traumatic collapse of its vote in 1945 the party has never been able to return to its pre-war levels of popular support, even as its political influence has returned. The rise of Thorneycroft and his separatist allies within the National Liberal Party proved a painful process for the Tories as their long term allies were wrenched away from them – leaving both the Conservative Party and the British Right as a whole in a precarious position.

Party Leader: Anthony Eden

Having served as Prime Minister for a shade under seven years, Anthony Eden is intriguingly Britain’s longest serving Prime Minister since Asquith despite having led his party into only one election in which he failed to win a majority. A skilled political operator and major statesman on the world stage, Eden’s star has begun to fade with his governing Alliance falling apart and many regarding him as a loose cannon following his involvement in the Suez affair. None the less, with the opposition divided between the Liberals and Labour they may be hope yet that Eden can continue as Prime Minister beyond 1958.

Foreign Policy:

Every year the division of the world becomes clearer and more solid. On one side stand the free peoples of the West, on the other the enslaved masses of the East. As Communism strides ever further forward Britain must continue to reassert itself as the international force the Left no longer believes it can be. Alongside our American allies we shall once again take upon ourselves the role of the arsenal of democracy against tyranny!

Over the past decade Britain has fought valiantly and defeated Soviet advances in the Far and Middle East alike, today Indonesia is the site of battle between the free and enslaved worlds. With Indonesia’s Communist bandits crossing over into Australian administered Commonwealth territory it is Britain’s obligation to involve herself in the conflict by sending support to our Australian and American allies as they fight to make Indonesia safe for its democratic government.

In the past eight years of Conservative government Britain has been transformed from a fading power into the vibrant third force in international politics – without British arms, our nuclear umbrella and our commitment to maintaining a strong fighting force the free world would be far less secure. Without the support of our armed forces the Soviets would feel far more confident to seek greater confrontations with the West – safe in the knowledge we would be dependent entirely on American aid. Instead, Britain, the United States, the Commonwealth and Western Europe form an impenetrable barrier against Communist aggression.

The Conservative Party calls for close integration with the United States and Commonwealth – hand in hand, side by side, the English peoples of the world shall stand as guardians of democracy and freedom the world over.

Imperial Policy:

The past government has proven its commitment to maintaining British influence abroad even in this age when direct colonial rule is becoming ever less desirable. None the less, our government has proved in Egypt that we are willing to stand firmly against nationalist regimes that seek to assault British citizens, properties and interests and in other parts of the world that an orderly decolonisation in which British influence and economic interests are preserved is possible.

The Conservative Party commits itself to ensuring that Britain remains a global power in perpetuity even if its relationship with the Third World continues to change.

Northern Ireland:

IRA terrorism must be opposed unreservedly and totally. Britain cannot and will not negotiate with terrorist violence against her citizens in anyway. The government must give its full and unreserved support to the authorities in Northern Ireland struggling against these murderous criminals – offering military support if it is requested.

Domestic Policy:

Only the Conservative Party is capable of standing against and defeating the twin evils of Socialism and deprivation. The answer to the recent economic downturn lays not in the maniac economic policies of the extreme right – which would only lead to social discord and economic collapse – nor in the equally troubling desire of the Left to introduce Socialism. Instead what is required is sensible and clear headed government armed with proven economic measures that shall restore prosperity and allow our nation to once more marched towards progress and a better future.

The Conservative Party supports an economy in which the private and public sector, workers and employers, government and the people are not in conflict with one another but work for each other’s benefits. Our party supports cooperation between all sectors of the economy in support of strong economic growth, improved living conditions and a fair society built upon hard work and ingenuity.

For a stable and prosperous society.

National Liberal Party


Political Position: Right

Ideology: Conservative Liberalism, Extreme Market Liberalism

Description:

The rise of the Thorneycroftians within the National Liberal Party, culminating in Peter Thorneycroft’s eventual rise to the party leadership in 1958, had left the party in a new and potentially dangerous situation. Losing a raft of members, and even some MPs, to the Tories as they turned their back on the Alliance the National Liberal Party could be certain of only two things – the party would have little to no hope of participating in government in the immediate future but it would no longer allow itself to be associated with the statist economics so detested by the party faithful. With the age of cooperation with the Conservative Party that had seen the National Liberals rise to become one of Britain’s greatest political forces, at least at the ballot box, coming to an end the followers of the so called ‘Thorneycroft Cult’ (as their enemies often referred to them as) had a precious opportunity to lead National Liberalism into a bright new dawn as a totally and completely independent entity.

Party Leader: Peter Thorneycroft

Defecting from the Conservative Party to the National Liberals after losing his seat as a Tory MP in 1945, Thorneycroft rose to fame in the early 1950s as the leading voice in the National Liberal Party that opposed the Alliance and its government. After becoming Home Secretary in 1954 his criticisms subsided to a degree before intensifying again in the face of the recession that began in the first months of 1957 and the factional struggles that swept across the two governing parties during the same period. Denied the position of Chancellor of the Exchequer and seeing National Liberal economic policy rebuked once again, Thorneycroft’s victory over Ernest Brown within his own party allowed him to finally bring an end to the Alliance and Eden’s government in early 1958.

Foreign Policy:

The United Kingdom must stand firmly alongside its greatest ally – the United States of America – against the aggressive advance of Communist totalitarianism. The interests of our own nation, of the free world and of the United States are identical as we all fight together to end the advance of Soviet Communism – and as was accomplished in Korea, push back its frontiers. We therefore advocate a firm and unswerving commitment to the NATO alliance and total support for our allies.

Adventurism, the like of which played saw the international prestige of Britain and the West badly tarnished over the Suez Affair whilst the world economy suffered the consequences of disruption its most important sea lane, cannot and will not be tolerated. Our role is that of a loyal ally – not a swashbuckling pirate-power willing to put the security of the free world at risk.

Imperial Policy:

The maintenance of an Empire than enforces itself upon peoples demanding their independence is a costly and morally bankrupt practise. We propose than the United Kingdom move to grant independence to any colony where the population overwhelmingly desires it, where the country is safe from takeover by armed groups, where it is safe from civil war, where democracy is ready to flourish and where British citizens, their properties and their nation’s interests can be guaranteed.

Northern Ireland:

The National Liberal Party stands against any negotiation with the Irish Republican Army and any questioning of the integrity of British sovereign territory. The British government must show its full commitment to the authorities of Northern Ireland in their struggle to protect their citizens from terror. All materiel required by the Northern Irish authorities to defeat the terrorists will be provided without hesitation.

Domestic Policy:

The National Liberal Party has made a brave decision. We have forsworn power in the interests of the British people; given up high office in order to fight for what is right. Never again shall a government including the National Liberal Party condone policies that undermine the freedom of the individual and the future economic prosperity of this country by preserving and advancing the overreaching power of the state in our economy and society. Never again shall we stand by and allow our nation to fall into terminal decline – be ripped apart by unions, bureaucratic-oligarchies, statist megalomania and well-meaning but ultimately fatally mistaken economic policy.

The National Liberal Party demands the privatisation of state owned industries, the removal of limits on the freedom of the market and the individual and the adoption of a sensible monetarist economic policy.

Just as the overarching power of the state must be fought against, we must mobilise ourselves against the most dangerous enemies of liberty. The Communist Party, a permanent fifth column subservient to Britain’s greatest enemies’ must be banned, whilst the trade unions, who in 1951 showed their ability and willingness to subvert democracy and attempt to destroy the elected government, must see their power reigned in significantly.

Ahead lays a long and dangerous road for Britain – but under the leadership of her National Liberal Party our nation shall lead the way forward. Let freedom reign and Britain enter a new era of prosperity that shall benefit the whole of society!

Labour Party


Political Position: Left

Ideology: Democratic Socialism, Social Democracy

Description:

The catastrophic nature of the 1954 election was difficult to fathom for the Labour Party. Losing 21.5% of the vote and a mind boggling 201 seats the party had sunk below the Conservative, Liberal and National Liberal Parties in terms of parliamentary representation, had lost its status as the official opposition to the Liberals and was even seeing trade unionists consider defecting to the Liberals. In the murky weeks that followed the election there appeared a genuine possibility that the Labour Party might cease to exist entirely. Instead it was held together by a the rise of a leadership that was willing to give concessions to both left and right, and Labour put itself forward as a credible contender for power.

Party Leader: Harold Wilson

During the Second World War Wilson had been a high ranking and valued civil servant involved with both William Beveridge, and his famous Report, and the coal industry. Elected as a Labour MP in 1945 he was brought into the cabinet as early as 1946 at the age of 30, making him the youngest cabinet minister of the century, as he drifted to the Bevantine Left of the Party. A vocal supporter of Bevan during the Korean Crisis of 1950 he was brought into the new Labour leader’s shadow cabinet yet by 1954 had begun to question Bevan’s leadership. The disaster of 1954 proved to be the last nail in the coffin for Wilson’s and many other Labour MP’s support for Bevan as he stood against both Gaitskell and Bevan in the resulting leadership contest and defeated both. After that year Wilson has attempted to maintain the independence of the Labour Party – affirming his commitment to restoring its position as the leading opposition to Right.

Foreign Policy:

Above all else, Britain must be an ally of democracy and freedom around the world. For better or for worse, the only way to achieve that goal, to oppose the spread of Soviet Totalitarianism around the world, is for Britain to accept its role as a member of the NATO alliance. Britain cannot risk undermining the unity of the free world.

Being a member of NATO does not mean that Britain must become the lapdog of American power around the world – NATO is a defensive alliance and Britain shall treat it as such. Britain shall refuse to take part in and even oppose efforts to expand the influence of NATO into an offensive organisation aimed at exerting American power over other parts of the world.

Imperial Policy:

The Labour Party advocates the resumption of decolonisation as we gradually grant the peoples of the British Empire their freedom as soon as independence is favoured by the majority of the local population and is feasible.

Northern Ireland:

Whilst the Labour Party would never condone negotiations with terrorist organisations like the IRA, we must realise that to simply fight force with force will result in escalations of violence and a worsening of the situation in Northern Ireland. Instead the British government must be willing to address the legitimate concerns of the Catholic population of Northern Ireland that have been repeatedly voiced peacefully by legitimate political parties within the province. Let the British government, the government of Northern Ireland and the peaceful Catholic Irish organisations work towards reform.

Domestic Policy:

The Labour Party supports the democratic institutions of this country unconditionally just as it seeks to advance the cause of social justice. The Labour Party shall never again involve itself in political alliances with the Communist Party, whilst continuing to strive for an independent voice of the working class that can never be provided by the Liberal Party. Labour remains today, and forever the party of the British working class.

We call for larger parts of industry to be nationalised, for workers to be involved management of all collectively owned industries, for the rights of workers to be guaranteed and advanced and this country to be made a more equitable place.

By far the present government’s largest item of expenditure is Defence. Yet time and time again it has persisted with the claim that investments must be delayed and social spending ‘kept under control’ due to budgetary complaints. This is patently ridiculous. The Labour Party calls for the gradual phasing out of outdated equipment – especially in the navy – and the ending of all programmes of military expansion. We advocate a smaller, less costly, more modern and professional army that will allow Britain to continue to play her necessary role as a part of the NATO alliance but will not see our nation weighed down by the expenditure and cancerous growth of Tory-militarism. The Labour Party would therefore also reduce the term of service for conscripted personnel to one year with a view to phasing our conscription entirely.

In response to the recession Labour advocates that the government take an active role in investing in the infrastructure of this country – both economic and social. New schools, hospitals, roads, ports and railway lines will all benefit our nation in the longer term whilst providing jobs and economic stimulus in the short term.

Labour is the way forward!

Communist Party of Great Britain


Political Position: Far Left

Ideology: Official Communism, Marxism-Leninism

Description:

In the bright days of early 1954 British Communism appeared poised to return to the forefront of national politics. Allied to Labour, the election saw a tenfold increase in CPGB representation in parliament as their vote rose above 10% for only the second time. Even with Labour suffering many hoped that a union of the two parties would soon be possible – especially with the Social Democratic moderates talking up the possibility of leaving Labour. Instead, under Wilson Labour distanced itself from the CPGB to leave the Communists isolated once more whilst an even worse shocked arrive two years later. The traumas of 1956 left British Communism in the lurch – bleeding party members and seeing a number of MPs defect to Labour the party was also thrust into an identity crisis with the Soviets calling for ‘de-Stalinisation’ and efforts at moderation and alliance with a Labour Party that had rejected them. Having definitively turned away from revolutionary politics, Britain’s Communists were also shut out from the wider political game leaving their role beyond being advocates of the Eastern Block ill-defined and unclear.

Foreign Policy:

We live in a dangerous world, a world dominated by the United States of America and its imperialist pretensions to bring every people on earth into its dominions. Only the Soviet Union and the nations of the Socialist Camp have dared to stand against the imperial power of Washington and they have been repaid with the constant threat of war and nuclear annihilation. The Communist Party of Great Britain calls for the peoples of the world to reject imperialism and to stand as partisans of peace against war.

British Communists oppose all foreign imperialist wars, including those waged by our own country as in Egypt last year, and will work with any and all organisations that share our aims.

We propose that the NATO alliance is abandoned immediately and Britain assume a position of neutrality with strong fraternal links with the Warsaw Pact and the other nations of the Socialist Camp.

In line with our opposition to war, the Communist Party demands the disarmament of Britain’s nuclear arsenal and calls for all other powers possessing nuclear weapons to disarm and prevent their proliferation any further. Humanity must not be placed in a position where it can destroy itself in nuclear fire.

Imperial Policy:

The Communist Party calls for the end of British imperialism entirely and insists upon the rights of all peoples to self-determination and independence.

Northern Ireland:

The apartheid rule of British settlers in the remnants of Britain’s Irish colony must come to an end. The Communist Party of Great Britain supports a united and democratic Irish Republic and an end to colonial rule in Ulster.

Domestic Policy:

The Communist Party desire the unification of the working class movement and the advancement of a progressive agenda aimed at promoting social justice.

We aim to resume the programme of nationalising ever larger parts of the economy began under the Popular Front in 1945 as we seek to create a vibrant planned economy – taking inspiration from the awesome achievements being made in the Soviet Union. Under a planned and rationalised economy we will be able to make great forward strides economically – ensuring that Britain takes her rightful place a world economic power.

British Communists are horrified at the level of defence spending promoted by Tory militarists. These truly obscene figures represent Tory attempts to hold on to Britain’s old position as an Imperial power in an age when the colonial peoples of the world have rejected them. Let us drastically reduce our defence spending to both ease the government’s finances at home and make clear internationally that Britain has no intention of continuing in her current role as an imperialist power

The class struggle continues, the British working class cannot lose!



All readers may vote either:

Liberals

Conservatives/Tories

National Liberals

Labour

Communists

! You may write the full name or shortened name of any party, so long as it is clear to me who you are voting for!

Please place your vote in a separate post or bold it within your post so it is easier for me to keep a tally.

Vote changing is not allowed. If you attempt to change your vote this will be ignored and your original vote shall continue to be counted.

Once again, spamming is not tolerated, you may not campaign outside this thread and I ask that you remain civil with each other.

Voting will close on Monday at 9:30AM, I will post in this thread to officially close the polls and return with the results shortly later.''
 

Tommy4ever

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New Elections !!!

Lets see if we can break the record turnout once again, last election we saw 67 votes.
 

Contravarius

Archsyndic of the Papiermützen
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What? There's NO party opposing decolonization? Who the hell am I supposed to vote for?
*Il Principe dom Contravarius starts seriously thinking about moving to Rhodesia*

((No, but seriously, this is absolute bull, Tommy.))
 
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