The travels of Zuckergußgebäck part II - Can you move-a?

[Exterous]

That was to prove fatal.

You aren't killing me off are you??!!

Where's Eddie?! *snif* I need him *snif*.........

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

December 7

Zuckergußgebäck took a look at the weather forecast for the day.


December 7, 1937

Hailstorm to sunny and clear with temperatures between -100 degrees celsius and +100 degrees celsius.
In other words, quite a precise forecast by Tannu tuvan standards.

Zuckergußgebäck sighed, he really needed Exterous to fix the weather station, but both he and Eddie had gone missing, Zuckergußgebäck wandered off in search...



Barrel of concrete, someplace in Tannu tuva.

- Eddie? Eddie? Exterous began
- My god, it´s dark in here! Exterous continued
- And furthermore, it smells so strange, like hardened concrete...
- I believe we are in a barrel Eddie, and do you know the best way to get out of a barrel, Eddie?
- How about asking Erich Weiss? The stuffed teddybear asked
- Who?
- You know, Harry Houdini.
- Nonononono, we simply set the barrel in motion and it will break against a tree somewhere. Ready Eddie? Push! Exterous said.

And they pushed, slowly the barrel began rolling, and it rolled faster, and faster and faster and faster and [Sound of barrel breaking soundbarrier]...


Tokyo, Japan, the divine toilet of the divine emperor (also known as... earth closet!)

BADABOOOOOOM!
- Stop destroying my earth closets!(Does anyone recognise that? ) The very divine emperor screamed.

[Sound of barrel going faster than the speed of light]


There was a young barrel named bright
Whose speed was faster than light
it set out one day
and in a relative way
returned the previous night

And by means of that limerick, Exterous and Eddie returned safely to Tannu tuva.

[Aftermath]

The divine emperor now stood in the remains of the divine earth-closet and scremed:

- I BET THAT IT WAS COMMUNARDS THAT DESTROYED THE DIVINE EARTH CLOSET, FIND THEM, CATCH THEM, DOW COMMUNIST CHINA!!!!!!!!!!


Then they realised that there were certain logistical problems reaching communist china, so they DOW:ed Nationalist china too.

 

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Stop breaking my wall damnit!!!!

HAHAHAHA You can´t stop me! BLITZKIREG!!! *starts bashing the head against the wall in an attempt to break it*

 

[Exterous]

***Disclaimer***
This is not an attempt to take over the AAR
All southern accents were faked, poorly
***End Disclaimer***

After safely returning to Tannu Tuva, Exterous, with Teddy Bear hugged close to his chest, looked on as Nuclear Winter proceeded to give himself concussion after concussion on the wall.

Exterous smiled "Thats real concrete there. Ya ain't gonna smack that there wall down with tha' thick head of yours."

Nuclear Winter: "Well, I as sure gonna trys!"

*bop*


*bop*

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

[The great wall of Tannu tuva]

- BLITZKRIEG! DUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNKDUNK!

Nuculear winter paused, then resumed his attembpts to bring the wall down.


Zuckergußgebäck sat in his warm little cozy office and was researching Cyclosarin, which would boost his 'nerve gas attack's tactical values by 8(TGW).

Exterous burst in:
- It is coming, it is coming, run for the hills, run for the hills! and looked like he was about to throw up.

Zuckergußgebäck moved to the left in case it was Exterous breakfast coming (up).

- What is coming? He said with a sly voice.
- Tha-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-t! Exterous said and pointed at a rubber ducky tied to a string

Zuckergußgebäck picked up the duck and squeezed it.
- QUACK!

(Exterous scuttled for the bunker)


[The great wall of Tannu tuva]

- BLITZKRIEG! DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK DUNK...


To be continued....

(OK, this was an odd update...)

 

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I a sure am likin'it Praise th'lord and pass th'ammo! YEEEHHAAAAWW BLITZKRIEG!!!! *bonk* *bonk* *bonk* *bonk* :rofl:

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

[The great wall of Tannu tuva, looking relatively unharmed...]

- BLITZKRIEG!

DUNKDUNK.......DUNKDUNK.......DUNKDUNK.......DUNKDUNK.......DUNKDUNK.......DUNKDUNK

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

[The great wall of Tannu tuva, still looking relatively unharmed]

- BLITZKRIEG!

DUNK...DUNK...DUNK...DUNK...DUNK...DUNK...DUNK...DUNK


[A few days, later, the same darned wall]

- BLITZKRIEG!

DUNK.........DUNK.........DUNK........DUNK........DUNK........DUNK


[What do you think?]

- BLITZKRIEG!

DUNK.........................DUNK.................................DUNK



[Still there]

- Blitzkrieg....

DUNK..................................................................................................................GLIPP DUNK!


As Nuke fainted, Exterous came forward from his hidingplace (A hollow christmas pudding) and made a bizarre dance near Nuke together with two very large handkerchiefs...

- Who´s the best? Aha-aha! Its me-e! Aha-aha! Now who´s the best? Aha-aha! Its you-u! Aha-aha... He sang, startling Shoma who ran away.



Shoma ran, up hill and down hill, over river and below river...
Suddenly it saw a nice little box with the text 'Private sector', it picked it up and carried it back to Zuckergußgebäck, who descided to nationalize it...

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

On the brighter side (of what?), I have began the prelude for the next Zuckergußgebäck-AAR, which will be set in TGW, I will not reveal its title, but you can get some clues:


1) Chopin
2) Saddam Hussein

 

[unmerged(15409)]

SOunds like a... well, a... strange (???) combination.
Looking forward to it though!
Keep it up,
and something I´d like to use my last seconds of conscience into:

blitz... krieg *faints, and as Nuke´s head falls strenghtless, it hits the Great Wall in a last act of defiance and stupdity*

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

Zuckergußgebäck yawned, so much to do, and so little time, he got up from his bed and walked over to a list hanging on the wall.

1. Read this list
2. Do what you just have read
3. Do all the things that you haven´t done all the time you´ve been in Tannu tuva.


Zuckergußgebäck sat down on a stool, then walked away for a session with Mr. Kaputt ze psychiatrist.


--- In session---

- How about some arabic djinn? Mr. Kaputt asked and drank a whole bottle, then went on to worship Quetzecoatl.
- Er, no telling me to kill my father today? Zuckergußgebäck asked from the depths of a sofa.
- Eh?
- De sofa clamavi ad te, Domine!
- Just go and kill your father, would you?


[Outside]
- BLITZKRIEG!

A elephant rushed past, yet Zuckergußgebäck hardly noticed. He was thinking about the meaning of life when he suddenly stepped on a spring left over from an old Boeing 747 whose activated engines had been the home of a eremite until he thought it was too cold.

(In other words: Zuckergußgebäck was catapulted through the air)


[Papal states]

The pope relaxed, he was sitting in the middle of the sun, hoping that he too might get a tan.

- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

The pope looked up and saw a strange-looking guy fly past.
- Omen accipio! he scramed and took cover inside a bathtub.

The pope contemplating what he really saw

 

[unmerged(15409)]

Hahaha!!! Don´t listen to Freud, he was an old pervert

And hey, this Pope looks uncanningly like John Paul the second, the actual one... perhaps they are relatives? Or is Zuckergußgebäck travelling in time? :dizzy:

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

OK, how about this one?

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

And hey, this Pope looks uncanningly like John Paul the second, the actual one...

As said, do not listen to Mr. Kaputts evil preachings...

perhaps they are relatives?

Yeah, must be a lot going on in the lateran, and what are all those nuns doing in the Vatican?

Or is Zuckergußgebäck travelling in time? :dizzy:

I have been traveling in time this entire series...

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

Sorry that it took so long before I could visit these wonderful forums, but I had to attend a close relatives wedding yesterday, the party afterwards lasted to 01:00, got home 02:00 and slept eleven hours.

AND I STILL FEEL DIZZY!

 

[unmerged(15409)]

Lots of booze, I presume That´s fine, when you can pull yourself together just write another installment and we´ll be fine.

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

Lots of booze, I presume That´s fine, when you can pull yourself together just write another installment and we´ll be fine.

Booze? Man , I did´n´t drink there at all, just ate a few hanfulls of peanuts, chips, two glasses of coke...

Six shrimps
one clam
half-a-slice of paté

And much more.


BUT NO BOOZE, AND I STILL FEEL DIZZY!

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

March 3

The song echoed out over thye barren plains of Bavaria as a rather odd-looking fellerstood on top of a pile of rubber wheels and sang.

Slightly odd-looking feller


The guy was interrupted by Hitler marching along in some very black and shiny wellingtons.

- Hey, Walter, what are you doing here? You aren´t supposed to be here until 1950! Hitler screamed and knocked Chopin over before he could leave a note.
- Oh, sorry Walter replied and let Hitler go on with whatever he was doing.



Hitler sighed and marched into Austria.

[Vienna]

- May I have your beautiful lands to please myt expansionistic ego? Hitler asked.
- Errrrr... OK 'BECOME PART OF THE GREATER REICH!!!!!!" Whoever ruled austria at the time screamed and handed it over to Hitler...



(So, this wasn´t funny either, perhaps I will need help from Nuke after all)

 

[unmerged(18043)]

Reads the latest on this particular AAR. Smiles at the humor. Small smile, small humor. As he gets up to leave he looks at Zuckergußgebäck and asks, "Do you validate?"

He patienly hold out his parking slip.

 

[Zuckergußgebäck]

Zuckergußgebäck looked around, he lay in a hospital bed, surrounded by seriously worried faces.

- Look Eddie, look, he is awake! Exterous screamed and begun to dance tango with one of the nurses.

(we wont mention all the people screaming: it´s alive, I tell you! It´s alive!)

- Where am I? Zuckergußgebäck asked
- You´re... here! Mr. Kaputt answered
- Great...
(Zuckergußgebäck wished that this was some evil dream)

- BLITZKRIEG! Blitzkreig screamed as he drove through the wall, Zuckergußgebäck tought there was something strange with the tank, he looked closely and saw that there was a pelican sitting on the barrel.
- This is the guy who saved you from flying around up there in eternity, Shoma 'The wise' said, he has volunteered to stay here and resque you in the future, given that he receives some tuna.

The pelican lifted into the air and landed on Zuckergußgebäcks chest, then it bit him in the ear.
- OUCH!
- Ah, look, it likes him already... Nuculear winter said, what are we to call it?
- Grewitt! The pelican sounded
- GrewenWhite, Semi-lobster said in deep thought (if ½ lobsters can think), yeah, that sounds good...


(Serious danger, I am losing style! This is not good)