The Empress and I - A Tale from Rome

[KaiserWilhelmI]

XVII

The war brought new changes to our lives. Empress Helene moved to Prousa, where she stayed at the former palace of my father, which was being renovated with great expense. We remained in the Queen of cities and tried to adjust to our new life as the crown prince and princess.

The court gossiped over the inheritance. A Turkish empress? the army would never allow it, they said. The Latins control the despot, they continued. There would be a civil war, and I would invite the Turkish hordes to sack Constantinople. Outrageous I know, but time would make some of those gossips true.

The truth was, that the army wasn't as powerful as it used to be. Its political power had been annihilated by the reforms of Andreas the Dragon, now the emperor gave the orders, and the grand palace executed them, the time of the military coups and usurpers was over. I was more afraid of the Latins, and the influence they had over my husband.

I turned 23 on the 12th of January 7076 (1568), the war with my uncle had been raging for about three months. Now I must again speak about my marriage. The situation with his hygiene was becoming ever more desperate. The empress had ordered him to bathe once a week in the palace thermae, or bath complex, by comparison, most members of the court bathed every day, and I try to wash myself twice a day, if I have the time. But every time my husband was forced to the sweating room, he began to cry like a little child.

The despot often wore a wig to cover up his few flocks of hair, but he would wear the same wig for weeks, and didn't wash his head in all that time. Every morning his pillow was greasy and smelly. I kept my own pillow away from his, because I afraid of vermin. Sometimes I screamed to him that I wouldn't let him come to bed until he washed himself. Thank the heavens our bed was huge. He didn't like to wash his feet, and didn't let anyone cut his toe nails.

I'm sorry, I have to get this out of my system.

I don't understand why he never complained about toothache, since he loved Indian sugar, and never washed his yellowed teeth. Sometimes he smelled of urine, I have to say it.

And every morning he sprang up from the bed and sat there with his short nightshirt. There it was, that dangerous pink snake. There was something wrong with it! But how could I, a virgin, explain it, I just knew that it didn't work.

I don't think that he despised me, he just never felt anything. Still, we had to sleep in the same bed. I would have been happy, if I would have been allowed to sleep alone. I couldn't read, instead I was forced to play with toy soldiers and dolls. I would very much like to know a woman that could have fallen in love with the physical side of Despot Andreas, but there were many who fell in love with his rank...

The campaign against the Turks had not gone well, but Roman arms carried the day. Overall losses were counted in hundreds of thousands, but my uncle was forced to sue peace, so he could concentrate on the threat of the Mamluks. The peace was advantageous to Rome, but new lands always meant new expenses.

The empress arrived back into the capital in triumph, and later we had a masked ball in the Venetian style, in celebration of the victory. I took the opportunity to meet with old friends, and new... My husband was happy for once, having dressed himself in latest Venetian fashion. I think it was around these times when the Venetians started to make plans for my removal. The despot would then be free to marry someone more suitable.

But none of it mattered, for that night I danced with a man. The masks made it all so easy, they couldn't guard me. I was intoxicated. I watched him, I liked to watch him, I didn't listen to him very much. He impressed me, unlike any man had done before. Then he removed his mask and I gasped.

There stood Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas, the warrior I had seen years before, on the day Hüdavendigar fell.

 

[stnylan]

And so we start to come full circle, with further hints for future.

I am getting rather excited

 

[guillec87]

Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas... father of Emperors...

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

The Pailagoi need to reclaim the empire's heartland (Anatolia) to fill their army to forcelimit and then proceed to Reunite the Roman World!

I admire your enthusiasm good sir.

An interesting view of the history. I do like the change of perspective.

I like the change of perspective too. I didn't realise that Ioannes IV had been so badly treated historically.

Thanks again! And yes, Roman history is one of brutality. Apparently you can't be an emperor if you are blind.

Subbed

Bless you sir/madam

Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas... father of Emperors...

hmm....To be granted the title of Basileopator, or "father of the basileus" would be a great honor, it has been awarded only twice in the entire Roman history. We shall have to see.

 

[Arakhor]

That's why abacination (a particularly nasty Byzantine method of blinding) was so popular. Irish tradition also insisted upon an untouched body, which is why there was a spate of severed nipples amongst royal candidates.

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

XVIII

Andreas, Andre, was made a courtier to my husband. One day he approached me like a lighting from a clear sky, such determination, such strength! It was dangerous, it was like holding a torch in one hand and a bucket full of oil in the other. I fell in love with him, and didn't see any flaws in this great Roman warrior.

Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas was 26 years old, three years my senior. He was handsome, intelligent and with a skin like bronze. He was well-behaving and very charming. His brother Kyrillos was the despots adjutant, and in the service of our so-called "young court" Their father was an adjutant to her majesty the empress.

The mother of the boys was born into the noble house of Vatatzes, she was known to be a lighthearted woman. There were rumors that she was the mistress of over 300 members of the Varangian guard. I believed it then, but not anymore. Three hundred lovers.... The Vatatzes' were one of the finest houses in Constantinople. This lady ruined the family's reputation without thinking about the consequences. It was like these noble women of the court had no sense of honor or pride. One had to be a whore. It was the Roman custom back then. Nearly all of the empresses ladies-in-waiting and other ladies of the court opened their legs to just about any stable boy. But I was under surveillance, the court was worried about my virginity. I began to understand the depravity in its lowliest forms and I swore to myself, that my life would be pure. But my life has not been pure...

The empress loved to hunt, even at her advanced age, she would sometimes organize hunting trips. Usually the ladies of the court were not allowed to participate, but for some reason I was ordered to go on this one trip. We stayed on the banks of the river Evros, in a hunting lodge built for her majesty's grandfather, Andreas the Dragon.

I immediately noticed that my room was next to Andre's, but I thought it was just a coincidence.... But in that evening we had so much fun. The empress didn't stay with us, so the evening was very informal. We laughed, drank wine, danced, laughed, played some cards, laughed some more and drank more wine. Maria was with me, Nikolaos had stayed in the capital, as he was formally part of my husband's entourage, and my husband wasn't invited... Maria watched me like a hawk, but eventually she fell asleep.

Andre came to me late in the evening. I had enjoyed his company the whole evening and now we were alone, we had a servant, who poured us more drinks. My God, how handsome Andre was! and so manly! Then water started splashing against the roof of the hunting lodge. It was a real storm, the banks of the river began to flood and the water rose all the way to the steps of the lodge, the garden was already under the waves.

We went to my bedroom and gazed out of the windows. We sat there and talked. He said I was beautiful and a desirable woman, like a flower he wanted to pick. I was nervous, that man woke up something I had never felt before.

Then I came to my senses.

The whole thing was a setup! I was a victim, again. They, Great mistress Tournikes, the despots chamberlain Theodore Laskaris, maybe even the Megas Doux, wanted me to fall into the arms of Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas. There must be an heir to the throne, and because my husband was like a walking pile of dung, I had to be directed towards a real and capable man. I woke up from the enchantment and asked Andre to leave. He left. I sat there until the morning, and thought about my life. I, Sophia, was still a virgin.

Andre knew I was under guard, even talking to me was dangerous. Getting into a relationship with me was both dangerous and impossible. But that passionate man loved me even more after I had rejected him out of fear.

 

[stnylan]

Nothing is every simple. Not even allowed a simple dalliance without political pressure.

I do enjoy the disdain of the court just dripping through. And one wonders if there isn't a certain amount of envy - even now - looking back. As well as regret: "my life has not been pure..." What possibilities are bound up in that half-line.

 

[guillec87]

I knew it!

 

[Hootieleece]

interesting...they are going to have to play a long game. If this romance is to be fulfilled.

That's why I am still thinking Catherine the Great ….because Pomtenkin!

 

[RyuDrago]

The whole thing was a setup! I was a victim, again. They, Great mistress Tournikes, the despots chamberlain Theodore Laskaris, maybe even the Megas Doux, wanted me to fall into the arms of Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas.

Why not the Basilissa herself? If she is the real mind behind this, shoud go straight to the princess and end this charade because she became too paranoid (which is good from one side but from another not so much).

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

XIX

Something inexplicable happened a few weeks after I got back from our little 'hunting trip'. Despot Andreas came to me, he was drunk as a fish. He sat there in my chambers with his hands on his face, stuttering something I didn't understand. He had received an ultimatum from the empress, he had to submit to a surgical procedure. He couldn't say why.

I finally understood, that the operation was to correct the problem in his manhood. I comforted him and said that after that, all the ladies will be competing for his attention. "What about you, Kyría?" he asked. "Will you be competing for my attention?" I said no. He looked at me like a loyal dog, and I escorted him to the hallway, where the empresses Armenian doctor was waiting.

Nikolaos came to me an hour later and told me it was all over. Snip snip and he was cured. He had passed out from all the alcohol he had taken before the operation, and was now sleeping in his room. I had seen Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas sneaking around our apartments that evening, Nikolaos talked to him, and later told me everything.

Andre and his brother Kyrillos had been placed into the service of the despot for the sole reason of meeting me. The hunting trip had been arranged so that he could take my virginity. The plan didn't work, because I refused, something that came as a great shock to the empress. Later it was discovered that Andre was ordered to request an audience from the empress. What did they discuss, and did Andre really meet with the empress? That I don't know. But I have a hunch... Andre received orders from the empress.

The despot was like a different man after the operation, he had been released from a heavy burden.

A few weeks after the operation Nikolaos entered my room, he told me to sit and sat opposite to me. "Kyría" he said, "you must now receive Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas, and forget about the despot, and all others close to you." He and Maria would be close by, always ready to save me. But I didn't need saving.

Niko left, Andre came in. I melted in his arms like only a woman can. I was full of fear, dreams, confusion, but I surrendered completely. I had been waiting for that experience. It was Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas who took my virginity, with great skill. No one disturbed us and we stayed together the whole night.

The two brothers stayed close to the despot, but they were told to be politely cold towards me. The empress probably feared we'd fall in love. Only now I understand that Andre had a mission, and love had nothing to do with it. Nevertheless, he would confess his love to me whenever he had the chance. I had never loved anyone. Fate gave me a chance to be with a true man. Did I do it with the despot? The court gossiped about it all the time. Truth was, that I never had any intimacy with my husband. But one night, I had to confess to him.

I was pregnant. He watched me with his pale eyes and said that we must keep our mouths shut. If the truth was to come out, we would both be exiled. He laughed and said that he must have been really drunk that night. I said, "apparently you were, despótes, very drunk." We never spoke of it again. Luckily the despot had fallen in love with one of the empresses ladies.

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

Nothing is every simple. Not even allowed a simple dalliance without political pressure.

I do enjoy the disdain of the court just dripping through. And one wonders if there isn't a certain amount of envy - even now - looking back. As well as regret: "my life has not been pure..." What possibilities are bound up in that half-line.

For some reason I really like the word dalliance. English is a wonderful language.

Why not the Basilissa herself? If she is the real mind behind this, shoud go straight to the princess and end this charade because she became too paranoid (which is good from one side but from another not so much).

The Basilissa indeed. Everything happens because she has willed it.

 

[stnylan]

So the Despot and our narrator came to a very practical arrangement.

Despite the increased ... ah .. potency, of what is going on it really however just reinforces how impotent our narrator was back then.

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

XX

The new year came, and with it winter. It was unusually cold one. The empress wanted to move the court to Thessaloniki, and so we went. Over 800 horses, all the furniture, the entire staff, thousands of them. And I, a pregnant woman.

I had so many furs on top of me that I couldn't move. I sat next to the despot, who blabbered about his latest crush. At some point I began to feel sick and my stomach ached. Next thing I knew, I was bleeding. When I told my husband he immediately went pale. He told the drivers to whip the horses, the despoina would have to get to Thessaloniki faster. He was panicking and said things like "If you intend to die, it might be better to die right now." and "I don't understand anything about children!" "Are you dying Kyría? You weren't supposed to die now!" "Nikolaos, please come here and sit in my place, I have no idea what to say to a dying person."

Niko came and soon enough brought Maria with him. Some point, right before Thessaloniki, I felt like I was swimming in blood. We got to the city so early in the morning, that Niko had to wake up the palace guards. We were taken to a new building, that the empress had ordered for us. The rooms were not ready yet. The ceiling was leaking, the walls were leaking. And the windows were drafty. There was no fire in the fireplace, they told us the chimney was blocked.

Maria took charge of the 'operation'. She ordered someone to light a fire, and to bring large carpets into the room, to block the windows and the leaky walls. And buckets filled with hot water. A nun came to help her, to help me.
The room was freezing cold. I was breathing smoke that came from the fireplace. I lost my child.

The nun wrapped up the bloody lump and took it away. I don't know what they did with it... I never knew whether it was a boy or a girl, I don't remember anything about the pregnancy. I was in pain until I fell asleep, still crying.

I laid in that ice cold room for ten days! I had three blankets. Then empress Helene came to visit me, she stepped into the room like a galleon and sat on my bed. She looked at me with a confused face. Maybe she was shocked about the coldness of the room, and my languished appearance. I couldn't speak much, you could barely hear my voice. I told her that the cold will kill me. I asked her to give me some other room. My throat was hurting and I had a terrible cough.

She must have been thinking so hard about the next course of action. She would say the words, and other people would act. I was a normal woman after all, not a demon, nor was I barren. She looked at me and I closed my eyes. I had stopped fearing death. Maybe they wanted to kill me right after the child was born, or it was just my destiny to get into this situation.

Then the empress said something that woke me up. "Sophia, when I was in your situation, I remember just how exhausted I was." My eyes went wide open. I had no idea she had been pregnant. Was it the child of the Megas Doux? I wanted to scream: "Let me out of here!" But she didn't care. She saw the fire in the fireplace, and thought that it was enough. She gently brushed my cheek and left.

I wasn't given a warm room. I was kept in an ice cold chamber for ten days, when the empress owned dozens of palaces with dozens of bedrooms. It was a murder attempt.

But I recovered. I didn't die, I refused to die. And when the murder attempt had failed, I was finally given better apartments.

Andre had been banished from the court after my pregnancy was announced, but now he was welcomed back. A new order from the highest level had apparently told him to get back to the breeding business. Better luck next time and all that. But I didn't mind. I practiced my skills with him.

 

[Arakhor]

Interesting update.

 

[guillec87]

so bad she lost the boy...

 

[Nikolai]

But I didn't mind. I practiced my skills with him.

The matter of factly way of saying this, after that ordeal...

 

[stnylan]

I am reminded of a line from another tale in another medium "[they left me] to die. I resolved to live".

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

XXI

After I had survived from my ordeal, Maria Tournikes, the great mistress of the court, came to visit me. For once she didn't scream, but spoke plainly. She asked questions, I answered them. She asked me, if there was any kind of intimacy between me and despot Andreas. I said no. She asked the same questions that the empress had once asked. Had I suggested sexual intercourse to my husband? Had I ever tried to kiss him? I went silent. To kiss him... He hadn't washed his teeth in months. Had he ever washed his teeth? He smelled of dirt, old sour wine and garlic. He really enjoyed garlic. It was almost impossible to approach him without the immediate need to vomit.

I told all that to Tournikes. I told her about the despots dolls and toy soldiers. He was only interested in me as a playmate, not as a lover. Tournikes watched me with pity, and for the first time ever I felt that there was some kind of connection between us. Then she began the interrogation.

-Who was the father of the unborn child?
-I do not need to tell you that.
-Was it Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas?
-I won't say.
-You must! You are the future empress consort, and the current empress regnant has the right to know whether the child was legitimate or not.
-My child was not legitimate.
-You do not have any sexual desires towards despot Andreas?
-We have no sexual desires towards each other, the feeling is mutual.
-Have you ever seen his...organ?

By God, I was blushing. The questions were very intimate.

-If that pink hosepipe is his organ, it reminds me of an earthworm. And yes, I have seen it. It disgusts me.
-So you have taken an able man?
-Are you talking about Andreas Palaiologos-Doukas, Kyría? I have studied under him, so to speak. I know how to act with a real man.

-Your Highness, empress Helene has ordered you to get pregnant. the father of the child is irrelevant, as long as he's a man!

I was given a permit! I was expected to sleep with Andre. It was an imperial order, and to disobey would be the same as committing a crime against Her Majesty, the Empress.

I would still sleep in the same with my husband, for decency's sake. All we had to do was to pretend that the child was his. So I was free to obey the empress and enjoy Andre's company. We worked really hard to give Rome an heir.

The second miscarriage happened in May 7077 (1569), I was bedridden for six weeks.

 

[KaiserWilhelmI]

The matter of factly way of saying this, after that ordeal...

Well she is reminiscing about her past, surely it was a painful ordeal, both physically and mentally, but she is a survivor. And, as we are about to find out, she has survived worse. She must be tough, no weakness can be shown.