The Cat's Lair (CatKnight)
There are people who reshape the world by force or argument, but the cat just lies there, dozing; and the world quietly reshapes itself to suit his comfort and convenience. --Allen and Ivy Dodd
Greetings folks, and welcome to my castle. Come join me by the fire. It's a frosty night in my area of the world, a good time to huddle close with friends and families and share tales of what was and might yet be again. The Once and Future AARer, perhaps? Anyone who's read through a few Crusader Kings AARs knows King Arthur has nothing on us!
Who am I you ask? There's not much to say - I'm the chap who's needed nine months to write out eight years of an EU2 AAR, I truly believe Cthulhu is a viable alternative for US President, and I once got into an argument over a quote gun. That's enough for you to know. I won't bother you with my humble beginnings in a long fallen order of knighthood, the first born of a half-demon and a half-angel, nor of my quests for the Golden Fleece, Durandel, and the Holy Grail, nor...
Where? Oh, I loaned them to the Museum of London. They should be on display there now. Go ahead, I'll wait.
*pause*
Good, now that the more gullible folk are out of the way we can talk freely. If you've read or written enough AARs, then like me you know a terrible secret, one the average citizen does not and can never know lest they go insane with horror. The truth is all this talk of feudalism, absolute and limited monarchy, democracy, republic, fascism, communism, and a hundred other titles meant to confuse the unwary are lies. Every single government on this planet is basically the same my friend. They are all overrun with that greatest bane to life on Earth: Politicians. Sooner or later, your AAR is going to have to tackle how to portray them.
Politicians are, of course, as old as civilization itself. Anthropologists have proof that the first successful politician ran on a platform of bringing fire to his tribe. He was quickly followed by the first anarchist, who set fire to his platform. Twenty-first century politics runs on similar principles.
The first to give a name to this growing horror were the Greeks. "Politics" is, of course, a Greek word made up of 'poli' - meaning 'many', and 'tics' - meaning 'blood sucking parasites.' The Romans were so alarmed they shrugged off the trappings of a republic and happily followed a series of megalomaniac emperors until an anarchist objected to Nero's fiddle playing and set fire to their entire city.
The European Middle Ages were a politician's dream. You might not think so with the continent overrun by petty warlords, but remember the fount of all legitimacy and learning, thus all politicians, was the Church. No one went against the Church, not even the Germanic emperors. Anyone who tried usually met a diplomat from the Kingdom of Sicily named Vito who made them an offer they couldn't refuse. Those who refused anyway wound up buried under Giants stadium in New York, which was rather strange since the Dutch wouldn't found the city until the early 17th century.
After the Renaissance being a politician became tougher. A series of absolute monarchs who simply conquered Sicily whenever Vito got saucy meant they had to be more subtle and learn to work behind the scenes. Even this couldn't save them in 1789 when the French decided the only good noble (read politician) was a dead one. Unfortunately for Europe, Napoleon took this one step further and decided to kill everyone else's politicians too. And their armies. And their people. And their sheep...
After Napoleon the modern era of politics begins as democracies take hold. As you know, in a modern democracy the will of the people is expressed by special interest groups, which in turn finance between two and 79,158 major parties depending on which country you're in. The modern political party stands on a platform occasionally detailing their ideal of the nation's economic, trading, religious, minority and military policies (according to Victoria,) but more often simply parroting what the latest poll says. Fortunately for them their platforms don't burn. Often.
Despite a few missteps in the twentieth century - namely Pikachu and Digimon - politics today are much as ever. This is a good thing as it makes writing about politics in AARs much easier for all concerned, especially me who's already spent 750 words trying to be clever.
Now, let's be honest: Not every AAR needs politics. If you're writing about your latest WC, or showing us a bunch of screenies, it probably doesn't matter what your marshal/duke/governor/chief of staff thinks. After all it's your game, those characters are (at best) a few lines of text in your save game file, and they can frankly lump it. If you're going to write a story or a narrative though, then you have a little more work to do.
Before we can discuss politics, we need a working definition. For our purposes politics are an attempt to influence governmental policy. A politician, then, is someone who's making said attempt. This is vague enough to cover everyone from your Crusader Kings vassal through Greenpeace. Despite scandals and jokes to the contrary, most politicians are honestly trying to make their town/state/province/country/world a better place. Their definition of 'better place' is where things start to get shaky.
Writing believable politics means writing believable politicians. Others have discussed writing about and detailing characters before, and Lord Durham's "character sheet" is always a useful tool, so I won't repeat what you already know - though I will emphasize a few points:
The most important thing you need to know about your politician is his ultimate goal. 'To help my king/country' is not an acceptable goal. If your ruler is listening to anyone who can't say that, then your ruler is an idiot and deserves his fate when Vito comes to visit.
You need to dig a little deeper. Being a patriot is all well and good, but your politician needs to know where he wants his nation to go. A modern mainstream liberal and mainstream conservative can both love their country - and fight tooth and nail about what's best for it. It's in that conflict that a political story can be told.
Crusader Kings and Victoria offer the most help here. The former gives your ruler and courtiers personalities that change over time, while the latter offers party platforms. Even Hearts of Iron gives you advisors that focus on specific parts of their job. EU/EU2 is unfortunately weak in this area, but a little research and/or imagination will more than suffice.
Once you know your politician's main goal, you need to consider his immediate goal. This is simply the next step in his plan. A valorous marshal who believes strength and power are synonymous will want your ruler to fight, while a party that believes in limiting citizenship to a given race or religion is going to block any attempts at equality. The immediate goal will change constantly based on game play and what the other politicians in your AAR are trying.
If your character is paranoid enough, he may also have a false goal out there for his enemies to find. This is especially true if your character's goals are contrary to either what's good for the nation and/or what the people believe to be acceptable, like a Communist in 1950s America, or Hitler in 1933 Germany. After all, you can't really just tell your citizens you plan to be a megalomaniac and trigger a devastating war.
When writing about politics, you also need to consider what these characters bring to the table. Specially, what are their assets and liabilities. Who can they call upon for favors? Who do they owe? Politics, if nothing else, is about compromise, deal making and the age old "I'll do this for you, if you do this for me." A 19th or 20th century politician who can convince major labor unions to go on strike is incredibly powerful, while one who can gather a lot of money for campaigning from sympathetic donors holds a different kind of power. The key here is to remember that politicians rarely act because they're feeling altruistic. They can't afford to. The people who put them in office, whether it's the ruler or a political party, expect them to do their job and that means acting in accordance with their goals. If they put those aside for someone else, you can be sure they expect the favor to be returned at some point.
What does this mean for your AAR? Whenever you have a major decision to make in game, stop for a moment and think about these characters. What will they want your ruler to do? Who's influential right now? What will your ruler finally order? Your game play may change if you do this, which can be both good in that it lends depth and realism to your AAR, and bad in that it tends to be inefficient. A brilliant example of both can be seen in Mettermrck's "Advantages without Obligations," which is featured elsewhere in this gazette. Mettermrck intentionally makes major political and strategic errors simply because that's what he felt his characters would have done.
In a way, this is similar to several interactive AARs you see where one person is playing the game, but lets others play various advisors. Each has their own agenda, and their own idea where the country should go. The 'story' is therefore more about how the players interact with each other and who can influence the ruler to do what they want.
How it affects your writing depends on the style of AAR you're preparing. As I mentioned, this doesn't really apply to one concentrating solely on game play. Narratives that read like history books, on the other hand, can concentrate on what each politician or political group wants and from there rebuild what happens next. In a story/novel type AAR, you'll probably get a more personal look at these characters and learn what they're thinking and how they interact.
In conclusion I'd like to point you to a handful of AARs that I believe do a good job of reflecting the political game:
CK: In Flanders Field by Rex Angliae
Victoria: 54-40' or... by Machiavellian
Until next time, this is the CatKnight signing off.
There are people who reshape the world by force or argument, but the cat just lies there, dozing; and the world quietly reshapes itself to suit his comfort and convenience. --Allen and Ivy Dodd
A Dirty Business
Greetings folks, and welcome to my castle. Come join me by the fire. It's a frosty night in my area of the world, a good time to huddle close with friends and families and share tales of what was and might yet be again. The Once and Future AARer, perhaps? Anyone who's read through a few Crusader Kings AARs knows King Arthur has nothing on us!
Who am I you ask? There's not much to say - I'm the chap who's needed nine months to write out eight years of an EU2 AAR, I truly believe Cthulhu is a viable alternative for US President, and I once got into an argument over a quote gun. That's enough for you to know. I won't bother you with my humble beginnings in a long fallen order of knighthood, the first born of a half-demon and a half-angel, nor of my quests for the Golden Fleece, Durandel, and the Holy Grail, nor...
Where? Oh, I loaned them to the Museum of London. They should be on display there now. Go ahead, I'll wait.
*pause*
Good, now that the more gullible folk are out of the way we can talk freely. If you've read or written enough AARs, then like me you know a terrible secret, one the average citizen does not and can never know lest they go insane with horror. The truth is all this talk of feudalism, absolute and limited monarchy, democracy, republic, fascism, communism, and a hundred other titles meant to confuse the unwary are lies. Every single government on this planet is basically the same my friend. They are all overrun with that greatest bane to life on Earth: Politicians. Sooner or later, your AAR is going to have to tackle how to portray them.
Politicians are, of course, as old as civilization itself. Anthropologists have proof that the first successful politician ran on a platform of bringing fire to his tribe. He was quickly followed by the first anarchist, who set fire to his platform. Twenty-first century politics runs on similar principles.
The first to give a name to this growing horror were the Greeks. "Politics" is, of course, a Greek word made up of 'poli' - meaning 'many', and 'tics' - meaning 'blood sucking parasites.' The Romans were so alarmed they shrugged off the trappings of a republic and happily followed a series of megalomaniac emperors until an anarchist objected to Nero's fiddle playing and set fire to their entire city.
The European Middle Ages were a politician's dream. You might not think so with the continent overrun by petty warlords, but remember the fount of all legitimacy and learning, thus all politicians, was the Church. No one went against the Church, not even the Germanic emperors. Anyone who tried usually met a diplomat from the Kingdom of Sicily named Vito who made them an offer they couldn't refuse. Those who refused anyway wound up buried under Giants stadium in New York, which was rather strange since the Dutch wouldn't found the city until the early 17th century.
After the Renaissance being a politician became tougher. A series of absolute monarchs who simply conquered Sicily whenever Vito got saucy meant they had to be more subtle and learn to work behind the scenes. Even this couldn't save them in 1789 when the French decided the only good noble (read politician) was a dead one. Unfortunately for Europe, Napoleon took this one step further and decided to kill everyone else's politicians too. And their armies. And their people. And their sheep...
After Napoleon the modern era of politics begins as democracies take hold. As you know, in a modern democracy the will of the people is expressed by special interest groups, which in turn finance between two and 79,158 major parties depending on which country you're in. The modern political party stands on a platform occasionally detailing their ideal of the nation's economic, trading, religious, minority and military policies (according to Victoria,) but more often simply parroting what the latest poll says. Fortunately for them their platforms don't burn. Often.
Despite a few missteps in the twentieth century - namely Pikachu and Digimon - politics today are much as ever. This is a good thing as it makes writing about politics in AARs much easier for all concerned, especially me who's already spent 750 words trying to be clever.
Now, let's be honest: Not every AAR needs politics. If you're writing about your latest WC, or showing us a bunch of screenies, it probably doesn't matter what your marshal/duke/governor/chief of staff thinks. After all it's your game, those characters are (at best) a few lines of text in your save game file, and they can frankly lump it. If you're going to write a story or a narrative though, then you have a little more work to do.
Before we can discuss politics, we need a working definition. For our purposes politics are an attempt to influence governmental policy. A politician, then, is someone who's making said attempt. This is vague enough to cover everyone from your Crusader Kings vassal through Greenpeace. Despite scandals and jokes to the contrary, most politicians are honestly trying to make their town/state/province/country/world a better place. Their definition of 'better place' is where things start to get shaky.
Writing believable politics means writing believable politicians. Others have discussed writing about and detailing characters before, and Lord Durham's "character sheet" is always a useful tool, so I won't repeat what you already know - though I will emphasize a few points:
The most important thing you need to know about your politician is his ultimate goal. 'To help my king/country' is not an acceptable goal. If your ruler is listening to anyone who can't say that, then your ruler is an idiot and deserves his fate when Vito comes to visit.
You need to dig a little deeper. Being a patriot is all well and good, but your politician needs to know where he wants his nation to go. A modern mainstream liberal and mainstream conservative can both love their country - and fight tooth and nail about what's best for it. It's in that conflict that a political story can be told.
Crusader Kings and Victoria offer the most help here. The former gives your ruler and courtiers personalities that change over time, while the latter offers party platforms. Even Hearts of Iron gives you advisors that focus on specific parts of their job. EU/EU2 is unfortunately weak in this area, but a little research and/or imagination will more than suffice.
Once you know your politician's main goal, you need to consider his immediate goal. This is simply the next step in his plan. A valorous marshal who believes strength and power are synonymous will want your ruler to fight, while a party that believes in limiting citizenship to a given race or religion is going to block any attempts at equality. The immediate goal will change constantly based on game play and what the other politicians in your AAR are trying.
If your character is paranoid enough, he may also have a false goal out there for his enemies to find. This is especially true if your character's goals are contrary to either what's good for the nation and/or what the people believe to be acceptable, like a Communist in 1950s America, or Hitler in 1933 Germany. After all, you can't really just tell your citizens you plan to be a megalomaniac and trigger a devastating war.
When writing about politics, you also need to consider what these characters bring to the table. Specially, what are their assets and liabilities. Who can they call upon for favors? Who do they owe? Politics, if nothing else, is about compromise, deal making and the age old "I'll do this for you, if you do this for me." A 19th or 20th century politician who can convince major labor unions to go on strike is incredibly powerful, while one who can gather a lot of money for campaigning from sympathetic donors holds a different kind of power. The key here is to remember that politicians rarely act because they're feeling altruistic. They can't afford to. The people who put them in office, whether it's the ruler or a political party, expect them to do their job and that means acting in accordance with their goals. If they put those aside for someone else, you can be sure they expect the favor to be returned at some point.
What does this mean for your AAR? Whenever you have a major decision to make in game, stop for a moment and think about these characters. What will they want your ruler to do? Who's influential right now? What will your ruler finally order? Your game play may change if you do this, which can be both good in that it lends depth and realism to your AAR, and bad in that it tends to be inefficient. A brilliant example of both can be seen in Mettermrck's "Advantages without Obligations," which is featured elsewhere in this gazette. Mettermrck intentionally makes major political and strategic errors simply because that's what he felt his characters would have done.
In a way, this is similar to several interactive AARs you see where one person is playing the game, but lets others play various advisors. Each has their own agenda, and their own idea where the country should go. The 'story' is therefore more about how the players interact with each other and who can influence the ruler to do what they want.
How it affects your writing depends on the style of AAR you're preparing. As I mentioned, this doesn't really apply to one concentrating solely on game play. Narratives that read like history books, on the other hand, can concentrate on what each politician or political group wants and from there rebuild what happens next. In a story/novel type AAR, you'll probably get a more personal look at these characters and learn what they're thinking and how they interact.
In conclusion I'd like to point you to a handful of AARs that I believe do a good job of reflecting the political game:
CK: In Flanders Field by Rex Angliae
Victoria: 54-40' or... by Machiavellian
Until next time, this is the CatKnight signing off.
Last edited: