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unmerged(17395)

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Jun 2, 2003
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Take London - A Swiss AAR

Take London - A Swiss AAR (Part I)

AAR_Title_Take_London.jpg



PS: As my mother tongue is German I apologise for bad English language and typos ;)
Historical accuracy is not intended and won’t determine the process of this story.
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Starting Position
1836 Switzerland - a lose confederation of 9 provinces (actually 22 cantons in Swiss terms) located in the very heart of Europe - is exposed 1836 to a multitude of severe risks: Growing Austrian threat in the East, worsening relations with France in the West, an obstreperous Sardinia-Piemont in the South and an instable and restive mob of small german nations in the North.

But – the biggest threat of all were Switzerlands own ministers:
swiss_ministers1.jpg


Take London
1836, Bern, Cabinet Meeting
There was a curious mood in the air when the Federal President entered the cabinet room; some ministers were smirking (but suppressed their laughing) while others had expressive faces and red eyes.

The president examined their faces suspiciously, paused a moment but finally opened the meeting:
Good morning Gentlemen. Today’s cabinet session will decide about Switzerland’s future foreign policy and …” … he interrupted his speech starring at the ministers grinning faces but then continued “… and I’ll now ask the chief of army to present his strategy plan elaborated by the ministry of defence.

The latter took off his black hat, cleared his throat, stepped towards the large table, reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumbled paper titeled ‘Plan A’ :
plan_A.jpg


At this moment the silence was gone: His colleagues figuratively exploded, bursted out laughing and pointed their fingers at him.
Everyone was convulsed with screaming laughter, lying on the floor or bashing their heads against it.

Retrospective its not entirely clear what caused Plan A to fail – maybe the fact that it was accidentally published to the press, and Switzerland was urged to extradite its author (chief of army) to the U.K.

Plan B
plan_B.jpg

The further proceedings apply to Plan B, presented by the Federal President, outlining these goals:
  • Turn into a high-tech nation providing >1.5 monthly research gain
  • Expand in the east and south by purchasing non-core provinces, mainly from Austria
  • Finance those territorial expansions by selling technology, especially to Japan
  • Warlike expansions in Europe only southwards into Italy, unless we can compete with big powers like Prussia, Austria or France.
It was an ingenious inspiration by the Minister of Bad Affairs to have all warlike expansions in Europe compensated with the release of own satellites in Africa and Asia (technically speaking to compensate the skyrocketing badboy value).


Milestone 1 (mid-term): Become the highest ranked industry power as well as top 5 of the overall ranking
Milestone 2 (long-term): Hmm...well...what was Plan A all about ..? ;)
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Imaginative, humorous, and well written thus far. Sweet! I love your use of the visual aides. :D

*Subscribe*
 
Very funny! If you can actually take London with the Swiss, you might even surpass Peter Ebbeson's conquests of the world! And I agree - great use of visuals!
 
Great pics, and keep up the great AAR!
 
Take London - A Swiss AAR (Part II a)

Starting actions at 1836
Getting rid of zero-income government

Switzerland immediately launches an election campaign on Jan 1st, as the current running laissez-faire & free-trade combination would mean a certain bankruptcy. We’re expecting the interventionism-party to win (=good) .
laissez_faire_zero_income.jpg


Cultural Research
While maxing the education lever we’re focussing on cultural techs in order to earn as much prestige as possible – and swap them lateron with industry- and commercial-techs.

Infrastructure expansion: Experimental railroad, experimental viaduct and its predicted crash
After Switzerland discovered its Practical Steam Engine it started manufacturing experimental railroads and - for the sake of prestige - a socalled experimental viaduct over the rhine river.
experimental_railroad.jpg

Fed.Minister (questioning the Minister of Transportation) : "For what reason is this bridge/viaduct called experimental ?"
Minister of Transportation: "Sir, we named it experimental because ...." (thinking)
Fed.Minister (now worried): "How likely will such an experimental viaduct be collapsing ?"

After a period of 10 years not even one single passenger dared to traverse the bridge (apparently made out of paper). The railroad company declared bankrupcy and the viaduct was removed.

Further starting actions
No Soldiers: We’ll try to primarily boost the economy and will wait a few years to equip the first soldiers.
Population: 4.9 Million Protestants (I guess V1.03 patch will turn some of them into catholics)
The finance minister settles the first technology-transactions with Japan (Switzerland provides technology and receives cash in return).

Negative relations with bordered neighbours
1838: Switzerland has negative relations with most of its neighbours and the tensions with France even raise.

Announcement by the Finance Ministry (1838) : Technology Transfers to Japan now exceed 1000/per tech (as our mutual relations further improve)

Voting Rights for women and minors (Universal Suffrage at 1840)
Minister of Bad Affairs (entering the oval office): "Sir, I recommend to grant voting rights to women and minors"
Federal President (surprised): "...to women ?"
Minister of Bad Affairs: "Voting rights lower the militancy of ..." (interrupted by the Fed.President)
Fed.President (now smiling): " .. and to minors ? "
Minister of Bad Affairs: now shamefaced, staring at the floor and remaining silent
Fed.President (after thinking for a while): "Grandiose ! We will grant voting rights for all of them."

Swiss WAR against Bhutan – Where is Bhutan ?
Minister of Bad Affairs: “Sir, we should declare war upon Bhutan
Fed.President (astonished) :” War ? Why the heck shall we …
Minister of Bad Affairs: “Because being at war will improve our international diplomatic status
(technically speaking it adds 1 additional DI point, while causing only little prestige loss the moment of war declaration)
Fed.President :” We don’t even have one single division. And where is Bhutan ?
Minister of Bad Affairs: “I do not know, Sir, where Bhutan is

The Fed. President deliberates some seconds (silence), then turns over to the Minister:
You’re a genius ! Our war against Bhutan will sustainably improve our international image.

di_gain_onwar.jpg


Purchase of Austrian non-core Provinces
Switzerland is focussing on these non-core Austrian provinces to buy within the upcoming years:
austrian_non_core_provinces.jpg


1843: Purchase of Bergamo & Milano from Austria
swiss_exp_bergamo_milano.jpg


Not even one division of regulars ?
Chief of Army (currently being ignored by the Finance Minister) is becoming nervous: “Is there any chance we could finance at least a single division of regulars ?
yawn_chief_of_army.jpg


Fight the catholics – in a 100%-protestant country
Sonderbund-event: We choose Fight the catholics(catholic militancy +7)
Fed. President: ”What a clever decision - we all know Switzerland is 100% protestant ! “ (as outlined in the grey pie-chart below)
But actually he overlooked the two newly bought southern provinces.
sonderbund.jpg


Status of Industrialization and Education
1845 We’re buying Interchangeable Parts from Belgium and using the 10 Machine Parts to finally setup a Papermill – desperately needed to build Clerks. At this moment the yearly Research Gain is still <1.00

1847: Top 8 Industry ranking

... continued
 
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Hilarious start! Looking forward to more.
 
Outstanding!! Italy is unified and your industry is number one. Your land purchases in the north are inspiring. And might I suggest balsa wood for the next viaduct as it seems you need your paper for other things. ;) This is fantastic!! Keep up the great work! :D
 
Dunderdon said:
When will you conquer London?
Heya Dunderdon !
I'm hoping this question to be settleded on the upcoming strategy meeting in Bern (1881) :confused:
I personally think it could happen at the end of the century the earliest ( my bet is 1905 :D ).At this moment Switzerland has the largest industry (=potential), but a relatively small army.
I'd actually favor taking France (westwards) or rather the german nations including Belgium (northern direction) to be in range of seight with the Britans (and to have a territory near them to eventually retreat) before attacking them directly.In any case we have to get rid of our asian territories before declaring war upon UK (they're bordering at UK-territory)
Do you think we should sneak up to London approaching southward from Reykjavik ?




Take London - A Swiss AAR (Part II b)

Bullying (Mobbing) and Russian war
As a cause of our continuing ghost-war against Bhutan (actually a non-existant enemy) the chief of army was increasingly exposed to bullying (mobbing) inside the ministry. He now suggests to join Prussia’s fight against Russia for the purpose of prestige.
Fed.President (doubtful): “How far is Russia located from our borders ?
Chief of Army:”At least 500 miles.
Fed.President (relieved) “Deal !

war_russia_safe_distance.jpg


1851: We somehow managed to buy machineparts on the world market and build some more factories
machine_parts.jpg


1852: Swiss Army manufactures its first regulars soldiers

1853 Finance Ministry Announcement: Tech Trades with Japan now exceed 5000 per tech (as our mutual relations improve)
tech_trades_jap1.jpg


1854: Top 2 Industry ranking
top2_industry.jpg


1854: Status of our South-Eastern (non-warlike) expansion
swiss_se_exp_1.jpg


The first Swiss warlike conflict
1856: Preparations for the first ‘warlike’ conflict on Parma and Modena (southward).
Chief of Army (tapping on the Fed.President’s shoulders): “What is a warlike conflict ?
At the end of Switzerlands first 'real' war Parma and Modena are humiliated, we earn some prestige, 1 province and promise to revisit in 5 years (with annexation).

1858: After approaching to the Mediterranean Switzerland finally operates its 1st Shipyard.
shipyard.jpg


Letter from the Ministry of Bad Affairs
1857: According to the Ministry of Bad Affairs our BB Value shows 4.833. Upcoming European expansions shall be compensated by releasing Arabian, African and Asian satellites such as Marocco, Aldjazair, Tunisia etc. (see the list below)
(PS: Technical explanations concerning BB can be found on this site)
We’re annexing uncivilized countries in a 2-steps procedure, thus raising only 1 BB value after a completed full annexation and benefit from -1 BB/province in case of granting autonomy as a satelite).

Between 1859 and 1880 our colonialization efforts (according to the procedure described above) will include:
  • Marocco(1859)
  • Aldjazir (1860)
  • Tunis (1860)
  • Tripoli (1861)
  • Madagaskar (1865)
  • Sokoto (Niger; 1867)
  • Oman (1872)
  • Cambodja (1872)
  • Annan (1874)
  • Ethipoia (1877)
  • Burma (1878)
  • Siam (1879)
  • Nejd (1880)

North Africa: Occupation … and/or Liberation ?
Due to the recommendation of the Ministry of Bad Affairs, Switzerland is preparing its first colonial liberation in Northern Africa.
Fed.President (muddle-headed): “Liberation ? Ammm....Aren’t we actually occupying these states ?
Minister of Bad Affairs (shaking his head) ”No – the opposite. We will occupy them in a first step, but restore them to freedom as satellites in a second stage. Therefore we’re liberating them.
Fed.President (emotionally affected): ”This is brilliant. You’re a genius!

1859: After Marocco was taken we’re heading eastward for Aldjazair, Tunis and Tripoli.
Meanwhile mobilization of additional 130 MP (manpower) is required.
north_africa.jpg


1863: We just discovered the last remaining cultural technology, but haven’t been granted any additional prestige points so far.
culture_discovered.jpg




... continued
 
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THose pics are really good, keep on thrashing the enemy!
 
Take London - A Swiss AAR (Part II c)

Approaches towards north- and center Italy

1865: After taking nearly all provinces of Papa States the Ministry of Bad Affairs urges us to release a Satelite in order to ease international excitement (technically speaking: to decrease BB). We’re therefore granting autonomy to Aldjazair.
satelite_aldjazir.jpg


1868: Cleanup in Center-Italy ; Switzerland is finally taking Tuscon and Lucca
Center_italy_cleanup.jpg


1868: Literacy hits 100%
literacy.jpg


The picture below - apparently representing a typical Swiss school class - was taken in 1868
swiss_school_class.jpg


1869: Tightening screws on sardinia-piemont (Northern Italy) and annexation of a handful of provinces
north_italy_cleanup.jpg


Termination of Austrian deals, negotiations with Russia
Partly as a result of our ‘technology vs. land’ arrangements with Austria it grew to a frightening powerful nation. Henceforth Switzerland decided to support its counterpart Russia and stop trading with Austria.
Russian non-core provinces (mainly polish and baltic cultures) are of our main interest.

1870-1874: Occupation and annexation of Oman, Cambodja and Annan. Madagaskar was meanwhile released as a satellite.

1875: Top 1 Industry Ranking
top1_industry_1875.jpg


Taking South Italy
May 1876: Two Sicilies is next
south_italy.jpg



Bombe Surprise: Invasion of foreign troops into Italy
Due to a warning from the Ministery of Bad Affairs (indicating that BB skyrocked to > 33) we are restoring freedom to Marocco, Sokoto, Oman and Cambodia (as satellites).
The Chief of Army who initially recruited tons of regulars based on those nationalities cannot believe his eyes (astonished) “How did those Oman- and Maroccan Troops get onto Italy – and where did our own troops leave ?
oman_troops.jpg

It will have proven false that he massively recruited troops based on nationalities we anyway planned to relief lateron.

Status of trade agreement with Russia: > 15 ex-russian provinces
Until Jan. 1877 Switzerland purchased > 15 Polish, Baltic and Finnish provinces from Russia (colored red in the picture below). More precisely, we received them in return for technology. The better our relation progresses the more provinces we receive.
non_core_russian_provinces.jpg

Baltic provinces will lateron be restored to freedom as satellites, while the destination of the polish territories is still unclear.


... continued
 
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This is brilliant. You’re a genius!

:)
 
Great stuff! *subscribes*

And never forget that "It All Belongs to Mother Switzerland!!!"
On a last note, you really should invade Uruguai. Kind of, because, you know, EVERYBODY should invade them once or thrice...
Keep going!

Nuclear Winter