I went to the zoo once with my friend Steve, his wife, and their 5 year old nephew, John, who just happened to be terrified of birds. Coincidentally there is a hummingbird exhibit at the zoo which my friend had been in before. You take a tiny plastic cup filled with sugar water into the hummingbird enclosure and the birds descend gracefully to hover above your hand sipping at the sugarwater - very cool. At least this what Steve described as he convinced his nephew, over his wife's protests, that this would be a good experience. "It'll be good for the boy. Make a man of him. Get him over his fear. One step at a time. You know, gotta start small."
What transpired was rather surprising. John, overfilled with confidence, took his cup of sugar water and strode fearlessly into hummingbird land. Apparently the birds are graceful and hovering as Steve described but only when they have been well fed and are feeling fat, sedated and lazy. Now when they have been starved for days.... A cloud of hummingbirds descended on John like a plague of rabid locusts. Eyes filled with terror, the boy screamed and tossed his cup in the air. Sugarwater spilled on him. Arms flailing, surrounded by birds stabbing at his arms, he sprinted for the door but crashed into a screen wall instead falling to the ground. Steve raced into the cage but it was too late. The birds had stripped every lick of sugar from young John's trembling carcass.
It was a great plan gone wrong. A chance to build for the future turned to disaster. Based on the looks Steve's wife was giving, I don't think he was going to have sex for at least a month...if ever again.
In hindsight, it was a very bad idea to load up a 9 month old game at three o'clock in the morning after a night at the pub and make the decision that mighty Suzdal was completely invincible.
Declaring war on the Sweden, Poland, Lithuania Alliance and then making an inebriated house rule that I would not part with a single province was a foolish, foolish, foolish...did I mention foolish....mistake. This long dead AAR is officially over.
o Note: John was okay and wound up going back into the cage a few hours later with Steve and me in tow. In retrospect everyone thought the whole scene was pretty funny...well...except Steve's wife.
