SPQR
Episode 5 – In Which An Angry Rabbit Makes An Appearance
And so, Kleitos sets sail on the fastest trireme in Rhodes, for time is of the essence!
Six months later:
“…and so, in conclusion, it should be readily apparent that this endless exploitation of the plebeians is an outrageous smear on the glory of Rhodes. Therefore, I motion that plebeians should henceforth be given an equal vote with the patricians on elections to government posts.”
Theo rubbed his eyes. “Nick, how many slaves do you own? More than anyone else here right?”
“Well…yes. I don’t really see how that’s relevant to this discussion.”
“It’s not Nick. I’m in the market for new oarsmen and, since there are only 18 of us here and we obviously can’t vote on anything, maybe I could go shopping at your estate.”
“Oh, well sure. I heard about your boat foundering. So you lost all of them? Did it sink that fast.”
Theo laughed. “No, that’s the funny part! We sank just offshore. The water was only chest high, so Philocrates and I just stood there waiting for help to arrive. I totally forgot the slaves were all chained in a sitting position.”
“Haha, yeah, you should have seen it Nick, we were just talking about how peaceful and quiet it was. Real relaxing, when Theo says ‘ say, the slaves seem to be taking this well, I would have expected them to complain a lot louder.’ Oh what a laugh we had when we looked below decks and all we saw were the tops of 60 heads just barely poking out of the water.”
“Haha, I bet that was a sight! Anyway, off to the estate. I hope you won’t mind if we discuss the egregious mistreatment of the Factory Workers along the way Theo. I’ve been planning to give this speech all morning and I think you will find it fascinating.”
“Wait, do we really…”
Lepi burst breathlessly into the Senate Hall. “He’s back! Kleitos is back!”
Athineos looked at his sundial. “Wow, that was quick!”
In no time at all, or rather, by 1030AM the next day, the Senate was assembled. 74 Senators showed up, an attendance record.
“Okay Kleitos, you have the floor. Tell us everything!”
“Well, there isn’t really much to tell. We rowed day and night, stopping only to procure more oarsmen until we reached Rome. I knew time was of the essence, so I left the ship to re-victual while I ran into town real quick. There, I saw these 12 massive tablets breaking down all the laws and rules governing the Romans.”
Polyphron’s heart leapt. “By Zeus! You got the whole law code! Amazing!”
“Here here! Brilliant Kleitos, just brilliant!”
Kleitos’ face turned red. He coughed into his hand. “Well. Like I said. I was in a rush, you know, had to get back here as quick as possible, so I just copied down a few things and ran back to the boat. I mean, I was only there 20 minutes or so. It would have taken days to copy all 12 Tables.”
“You spent 6 months at sea. Do you think it would have been the end of the world to spend even a full hour getting the information we sent you for?”
Kleitos flushed with embarrassment. He was feeling defensive. “Hey look, you guys said I needed to hurry. Look, I got the important stuff, now do you want to see it or not?”
“I’m sure you did just fine Kleitos and, anyway, we all had a very nice time while you were gone working hard for the Republic, so go ahead and show us what you’ve found.”
Kleitos unrolled a scroll and passed it around the room.
“Well, they give Executive Authority to a Consul who is elected every 2 years and you can’t be Consul twice in a row. I think. I may have made that up, but I think it’s a good idea. The Consul then appoints all these other posts. Now, there are term limits, but someone can be fired early, only not for the first year on the job...”
Theo was looking over the scroll at that moment. “Hold up Kleitos. You mean to tell me you didn’t have time to find out what a Pro-Consul or Praetor does, but you had time to sketch that horrid rabbit?”
Alright, so maybe the plan wasn’t so clever. Aristonomes’ part continues to be non-existant, but his day will come, fear not. And who knows, by next month, we may even move into the game’s beginning!
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Also, I am thinking of creating character profiles for the major ones giving their personal histories, etc. Mostly, this is because I need to be able to keep up with lots of information for these guys. They would probably contain spoilers, but since 'Surprise' isn't really important, I don't think that will matter too much. If this is something you guys might find useful, I can use a Paradox Blog for that (so you'd have an easy reference tool if, say, someone's portrait hasn't stuck in your head). Let me know.
