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    Real Strategy Requires Cunning

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Some interesting stuff in that direction to be sure. Must exploit.

Definitely getting the impression there might be some satire in this AAR as well.
Satire? Me? Never!
Close? Did he say CLOSE? HERESY!
Well the Ganlarev don't really go in for the spiritualist thing, so "heresy" is a bit of an alien concept. The expression they would use would be "unbearable torture". But there may be a solution!
To build an empire, one must sometimes become that which one fears most. In the Ganlarev's case, this means "cuddly."
:D Cuddly! I like it!
Great AAR. I wonder if the Blorg will make an appearance...
Thanks. A Blorg appearance is unlikely though as we are in a tiny galaxy. Not a lot of people around when all's said and done.

And here is today's helping.
 

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Close Encounters of the Ganlarev Kind

At the end of the last chapter we left President Bagglosch with the tricky challenge of getting a shipload of colonists to Sadatoni IV, and the even trickier challenge of transporting an assault force to Samderaan IV to subjugate the primitive Qvefoz.

It was Science Officer Regglor who came up with a solution to both problems, a technique which he called “sardining”. By means of drugs, hypnosis and sheer iron will-power, crack Ganlarev troops were trained to be able to withstand months of close proximity to their comrades in arms, to enable them to make the long voyage to Samderaan IV with as many as 100 Ganlarev to a single transport ship.

But before this, sixteen of the most promising recruits were given the opportunity of founding a colony on Sadatoni IV instead. Sadatoni was an ocean world, dotted with a large number of small islands. Unfortunately, salt water had an adverse effect on Ganlarev body tissue, making it go soggy and disintegrate, so an ocean world was not really ideal for them. However, the promise that each colonist would be able to live on their own desert island hundreds of miles from anyone else was a big attraction. It would be just about possible to cultivate a few acres of scrawny jungle on islands in the warmer latitudes, so the plan seemed feasible.

And so it was that in 2213 the second Ganlarev colony ship, GCS Claustrophobia, set off on its voyage to Sadatoni. There were many who predicted that the expedition would end in ignominious failure, but they were proved wrong. True, the colonists seemed more like undead zombies when, at the end of the voyage, they were each deposited on their allotted island. But once the temporary effects of sardining had worn off they all seemed to recover quite happily from the ordeal. Psychotherapist Jegglom was flown in from Banthary II to check up on the situation and she reported that, in her professional opinion, sardining seemed to have worked, and to have no long-term side effects. The neolithic race who inhabited many of the islands were neatly tidied onto one of the more uninteresting ones and forgotten about.


2214-sadatoni.jpg

A typical Sadatonian island

It was during the voyage of the Claustrophobia that the DIC reported another alien feed coming in on the olfac-link, from a sector of the galaxy to antispinward of Sadatoni and Samderaan. President Bagglosch had his first opportunity for interstellar diplomacy, and he decided to take a different tack from his predecessor.

2213-kalaxenans.jpg
I am President Cax of the Kalaxenan Confederated Systems. I bring greetings.

Hello! This is President Bagglosch of the Ganlarev Concordat here. Well. this is an... unexpected surprise, finding you in this corner of the galaxy. You probably don't want to have much to do with us.

On the contrary, we are fascinated by all alien races. Our territory is extensive, but we see no reason for any conflict. We look forward to a long and fruitful relationship with the Ganlarev.

OK, right, well that might be possible I suppose.

Your technology is somewhat primitive. There are many things you do not seem to have discovered yet.

Really? What sort of things?

Roll-on deodorant, for example.

Um... you're right – never heard of that. But we'll probably be getting round to it sooner or later.

That will be good.

Well, here's to a long and fruitful relationship, as you say.

Affirmative.

Bye for now!

President Bagglosch felt that this had gone quite well. He seemed to have struck just the right note with these somewhat superior aliens. He didn't really want any sort of relationship with them if the truth be told, but perhaps they might be willing to help the Ganlarev with some advanced technology, such as roll-on deodorant, whatever that was.

Next it was time for the subjugation of the Qvefoz of Samderaan IV. As can be imagined, warfare in Ganlarev history was mainly of the chemical and biological sort. Weapons routinely banned by civilized races as being too horrific to use were the stock in trade of the Ganlarev arms industry. However, the aim of the operation was not to annihilate the Qvefoz, but merely to shock them into submission killing as few of them as possible. It was code named “Operation Squawk and Awe”.

First, a 2.5 megaPoo poison sac was exploded over one of the larger flocks of Qvefoz. Some died instantly, many more suffered a slow and lingering death, while a few survived to take news of the terrible event to other flocks. Unfortunately, the Qvefoz' primitive communications network meant that this took a very long time. The Sardine Squad commander decided that the job would need to be done by Ganlarev troops driving across the planet in hermetic troop carriers, with loudspeakers on top. The Qvefoz had only a rudimentary sense of smell and communicated by means of complex patterns of air vibration – a somewhat unlikely notion. However, a suitable message was translated into these patterns and broadcast from the troop carriers.

“We are the Ganlarev. We are your new overlords, Resistance is futile.”


Some Qvefoz flocks tried to storm the troop carriers. Larger flocks were driven back with toxic gas cannons, while for smaller flocks the driver would simply open the doors of the carrier for a few seconds to let out his own body odour. The Qvefoz who survived soon realized that resistance was indeed futile.

2214-qvefoz-subjugation.jpg
It was a great relief to the Qvefoz when Operation Squawk and Awe came to a close and a small Governor's Residence was set up at a strategic location on the planet. A staff of administrators was also left to begin the daunting task of bringing the pitifully primitive Qvefoz into the 23rd century as quickly as possible. It was a thankless task, and looked like it would take many decades to complete. Nevertheless Samderaan was now unquestionably a Ganlarev system, opening up a whole new part of the galaxy. In fact, Ganlarev space now bordered directly on Kalaxenan territory.

Incoming olfac-link feed from Kalaxenan Confederated Systems – President Cax requesting contact with President Bagglosch of the Ganlarev Concordat.


2213-kalaxenans.jpg
President Cax – what a surprise! How can I help you?

You were right, Ganlarev.

Ah – very good. What about, exactly?

We don't want anything to do with you.

Oh. I see. Well, that's nice.

Word has reached us concerning your activities on Samderaan IV.

Oh, that? Yes, we thought it went rather well. Bunch of witless penguins – pfff!

Our xenologists were planning to undertake a longitudinal study of Qvefoz society during its early development. Now all we get to study is mindless Ganlarev brutality.

Oh. Well, that's probably quite interesting too, isn't it?

It is sickening. But be assured, Ganlarev, we are observing you. Closely.

Err... right.

We are hoping that you will mend your ways.

I see. Perhaps you could give us some help? What was that advanced tech you mentioned? Roll-on deodorant, something like that?

That will not solve the problem.

Oh.

In the meantime, our borders are now closed to Ganlarev ships.

Well, to be honest we didn't really want to cross them anyway.

Good.

So, err... will that be all then, Mr President?

That is all. But take heed. We are observing you.

Eh – sure.

This was a little worrisome. Evidently the Kalaxenans, for reasons best known to themselves, took an interest in primitive species such as the Qvefoz. More than that, they seemed to think that killing a few of them for the purposes of quick and efficient subjugation was somehow undesirable. Evidently the Ganlarev would need to tread carefully when it came to expanding antispinward.

2215-galaxy.png

The galaxy at the start of 2215 - the Kalaxenans are the large greenish blob on the right
 
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stnylan

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But so many opportunities for colonisation still in that direction...
 

Nikolai

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I chuckled a tiny weeny bit when I read GCS Claustrophobia :D
 

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But so many opportunities for colonisation still in that direction...
Rest assured - the Ganlarev intend to spread their aroma into those parts sooner or later.
I chuckled a tiny weeny bit when I read GCS Claustrophobia :D
Naming ships is one of the fun things about this game, especially when writing an AAR. I'm a huge fan of Iain M Banks' Culture ship names, some of which are hilarious.
Touchy bunch, those Kalaxenans. Can't they just tend to their own affairs without interfering in the affairs of others, like any good species should? :p
That's the trouble with xenophiles. As long as you're a measly bunch of primitives they're all "Ooo we mustn't interference in their civilization in case we disturb their delicate balance". As soon as you want to do anything interesting like conquer the galaxy they're down on you like a megaton of asteroids. :eek:
 

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Tied Tentacles

Science Officers Pablasch and Alorig were still surveying systems antispinward of Ganlarev space, and rimward of the Kalaxenans. In 2216 Pablasch contacted President Bagglosch about something he'd found which might be significant.

Well, Pablasch, what have you got for us now?

A tropical world in Regganus, sir. Fairly large too.

Excellent Pablasch – perhaps it should be the site of our next colony?

Just one problem, sir. There's somebody already there.

Ah.

The Screk, sir, some sort of nasty giant insect species. Another extremely primitive civilization. Similar level to the Qvefoz, but they're quite warlike. They spend a lot of time running around stabbing each other with iron implements. Apparently for fun.


2216-screk.jpg

They seem like a race the galaxy could safely do without, Pablasch. Perhaps they might be wiped out by the sudden appearance of a mysterious deadly and incurable virus?

Um, well, they might sir. But what about the Kalaxenans? They might smell a rat.

Or rather, a Ganlarev. Yes, you may be right, Pablasch. Any sign of them around there? You know, “observing us closely”?

Well not as such, sir. But you know, they do have a lot of advanced technology. They may be using this mysterious Roll-on Deodorant or something for long-distance surveillance.

Yes, it seems our tentacles are tied for the moment. Well, you certainly did the right thing keeping me informed, Pablasch. Anything else that comes up, don't hesitate to get on the blower.

Of course, sir.


But President Bagglosch did not like having his tentacles tied. What right did the pesky Kalaxenans have to order everyone else around, tell them what they could and couldn't do? What the Ganlarev Concordat needed was a bit more military might. A fleet that would make the Kalaxenans think twice about trying to push them around. He gave orders for the Spaceport of Ganlarevia to be expanded with new corvette assembly yards. This would be the first step towards Ganlarev military dominance.

Alas, Kalaxenan surveillance seemed to quickly pick up on this development.

Incoming olfac-link feed from Kalaxenan Confederated Systems.


This is an official communication from President Cax of the Kalaxenan Confederated Systems.

2216-kalaxenans.jpg

Mr President, sir! This is President Bagglosch here. No doubt you wish to congratulate us on our exemplary behaviour with regard to the Screk of Regganus III?

No. We did not notice anything exceptional in your dealings with the Screk.

But – but - what about the complete absence of any sort of genocidal purging?

Among civilized races, this is not exceptional behaviour.

Oh.

We wish to warn you. It has come to our notice that you are planning to increase your military power. As a result the Kalaxenan Confederated Systems will henceforth consider you to be the Enemy.

Aw, come on! We just want to build a few teensy weensy little corvettes.

You wish to rival the power of the Kalaxenan Confederated Systems. Do not deny this. We are monitoring your parliamentary proceedings. We are monitoring your private conversations, President Bagglosch. We are observing you. Closely.

Sheesh! That Roll-on Deodorant stuff must be more sophisticated than we suspected.

We have nothing more to say.

Right. Well I don't have anything more to say to you either as it happens. It seems this is the end of our “long and fruitful relationship”. I can't say I'm sorry about that.

Indeed. However, we will not cease to observe you.

Whatever.

This was another unsettling development in the Ganlarev's relations with their most powerful neighbours. What to do? President Bagglosch was not deterred from his resolve to build up the Ganlarev fleet, and the construction of corvettes above Ganlarevia continued unabated. However, he also took care not to indulge in any activities in the vicinity of Kalaxenan space which could be interpreted as expansionist.

Fortunately there was one obvious way to expand the Ganlarev Concordat which should not antagonize the Kalaxenans in any way, and that was the colonization of Evaggimar III. A large tropical world noted for its abundance of natural resources, President Bagglosch asked himself why it had taken so long for the Ganlarev to get around to sending a colony ship there. So in 2218 the GCS Oblivion set off with another sixteen drug-crazed “sardines” on board to found the third Ganlarev interstellar colony.

But far from being met with indifference by the Kalaxenans, this move was greeted by yet another communication from President Cax. President Bagglosch responded with some trepidation.


President Cax – how unexpected. I was under the impression that our long and fruitful relationship had come to an end.

We have had second thoughts.

Oh, that's a shame.

We have a new proposal to put to you regarding our relationship. More of a demand actually.

Right... er... what's that exactly?

You will submit to becoming a vassal state of the Kalaxenan Confederated Systems. This is for your own good, of course. It is the only way to prevent anything... unfortunate happening.

A vassal state?? What the... Oh – wait a moment, I get it! This must be an example of Kalaxenan humour! Well, I must say it's refreshing to find that at least one other race in the galaxy has a sense of humour. We'd kind of drawn a blank up till now.

It is not a joke.

Oh.

It is an ultimatum. You can accept, or you can refuse.

Right. So, er... what happens if we refuse?

If you refuse, you will find out.

Ah. Well, if it's all the same to you Mr President, I think I'd like to go with option B.

You refuse?

Yes. Well, you know, I'm just curious about the consequences. We're a curious race you know.

You are a foolish race. And odious in the extreme.

Yup! That's us!

You have not heard the last from us, fungoid.

Whatever.

Despite the brave face which President Bagglosch put on it, this was definitely the most worrying development yet in the Kalaxenan saga. Then came news of a group of Qvefoz freedom fighters who had somehow managed to organize themselves into something they called the Samderaan IV Autonomous Bloc, demanding independence for the Samderaan system. They were clearly being funded by the Kalaxenans, who had apparently decided to fight only proxy wars for the time being.

2220-qvefoz.jpg


A member of the S4AB – at least they've progressed from the iron age

Thus when the next presidential election took place in 2220, President Bagglosch had lost much of his former confidence. He failed to win the votes he needed for re-election and was replaced by a relative newcomer to Ganlarev politics, the ambitious President Shushk.

President Shushk was proposing two avenues of progress for the Ganlarev. Firstly he vowed to oversee more scientific research, something which had been neglected up till then in favour of mining and energy generation. He was particularly keen to see orbital research stations built wherever possible. Secondly, he had ambitions plans to expand Ganlarev colonization into far-flung parts of the galaxy, to ensure that plenty of planetary space was available as the Ganlarev race continued to grow in size.


2220-shushk.jpg




2222-galaxy.jpg


The space which President Shushk was intending to fill with the sweet aroma of Ganlarev colonies


 
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stnylan

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All sounds very interesting. I wonder if the way one declares war on the Ganlarev is to send them some air freshner?
 

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It seems it's time to turn the tables - and make the Kalaxenans vassals.*nods*
 

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All sounds very interesting. I wonder if the way one declares war on the Ganlarev is to send them some air freshner?
That would certainly be considered a diplomatic insult at the very least. If the Ganlarev actually understood what it was, that is. :D
It seems it's time to turn the tables - and make the Kalaxenans vassals.*nods*
Perhaps that day will come - but not quite yet I'm afraid. Still, things are looking up, as is about to be revealed.
On the bright side: Now that the Ganlarev are at war with the Kalaxenans anyway, conquering and subjugating the Screk can't antagonize them anymore!
It is only a suspected proxy war, of course. The Ganlarev are unfortunately still having to tread warily when it comes to antagonizing their scary neighbours.

But, as I say, things are looking up.
 

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A Migrant Crisis

At the end of the last chapter, we left the newly elected President Shushk of the Ganlarev Concordat vowing to promote more scientific research and also to push forward the frontiers of Ganlarev space. His research programme did not get off to a very good start, however. In 2221 a shoal of space-borne organics drifted into the Samderaan system, blew up a newly built research station above one of the outer planets, apparently for their own amusement, then drifted away again. President Shushk could only fume and flail his tentacles, for the Noxious Fleet, although now bigger than ever, would still not have been big enough to take on this interstellar gang of mindless jellyfish. It was just as well that research had now begun into a larger class of ship, destroyers, with which such enemies could perhaps be kept at bay.

The following year an even more disturbing report reached Ganlarevia from Governor Bagglosch of Samderaan IV. Yes, the former president had fallen on hard times and was now reduced to living in a draughty igloo and trying to keep the feisty Qvefoz freedom fighters under control. But now a new threat had appeared in the Ganlarev Concordat's most troubled system. A huge and mysterious fleet had appeared there and was now hovering over the site of the recently destroyed research station. All attempts to make contact with these ominous visitors proved fruitless, but the size of their fleet meant that they could not simply be ignored. Fear now gripped the Ganlarev as they awaited the outcome of this new development.


2222-alien-menace.jpg
After several months of fretting and tentacle-twitching, President Shushk finally received a communication from the mystery visitors on the DIC olfac-feed.

2223-namarians.jpg
What the President really wanted to say in response was “Get lost you bunch of losers”, but he felt that, in view of the size and power of the Namarian fleet, a certain level of politesse was called for. In any case it seemed that the Namarians were peaceful and could safely be ignored. Their tale of woe about being vilified and rejected by almost everyone they met and hounded from system to system and galaxy to galaxy smelled improbable in the extreme. If everyone else really had rejected the Namarians, there must be some good reason for it. The best course of action was simply to wait for these wretched undesirables to continue on their way, preferably sooner rather than later.

But rather than quietly leaving as soon as possible, the Namarians contacted President Shushk a few months later with an unwelcome request.

Incoming olfac-link feed from the Namarian Fleet in Samderaan.


Greetings from the Namarians, sad wanderers among the celestial spheres.

Hi. This is President Shushk here. Perhaps you're ready to leave us now?

No, not quite yet. We would like to enjoy the pleasure of your hospitality for a short while longer.

Oh.

If that does not trouble you, of course.

Err, well... I guess that's OK.

In fact we have a request to make of you.

Oh dear. I mean, yes, we always like to try and help those less fortunate than ourselves. Especially if they have huge starfleets hovering in our systems.

Some of our people have grown weary of a wandering lifestyle.

Ah. This doesn't sound good.

We are wondering if you might find it in your hearts to welcome them onto one of your worlds.

Umm. Well, we do have some small barren moons in otherwise deserted systems that we don't need, I suppose.

We seek a habitable desert world.

Ah well, we definitely don't have any of those. Well that's too bad, sorry we can't be of any help. Why don't you try the Kalaxenans? They're always interested in helping downtrodden alien races.

We have visited the Kalaxenans. They are a sadly unspiritual race. Our people's souls would be at risk if we were to settle among them.

Oh. Well we're pretty pagan ourselves actually.

We have not found this to be so. You have a spiritual aroma about you.

Well, no one's ever called it that before.

What about Sadatoni IV? We have heard that there are many desert islands dotted across its oceans.

Ah well, see, desert islands and desert planets, they're not really the same thing.

We will make do with some small desert islands. If you are willing to welcome us.

Oh dear. I think I need to consult with others of our race. We might be able to arrange something, but I'm not making any promises.

We will be eternally grateful for the smallest crumb of succour you can offer us. We have no one else to turn to.

Boy, have you guys drawn the short straw...

President Shushk immediately contacted Governor Bagglosch for an emergency consultation.

What do you think, Governor Bagglosch? They actually want to live on the same planet as us!

They'll be taking our jobs, overloading our benefit system, wandering round our shops speaking funny languages...

Perhaps we should just say no.

Except for this extremely large warfleet sitting in Samderaan, sir.

They haven't actually threatened us with any sort of reprisals.

Isn't it suspicious, sir, that they arrived from Kalaxenan space? I wouldn't be surprised if those wretched xenophiles were behind the whole thing. Perhaps it's some sort of a test? They did say they were still observing us.

So you think if we turn the Namarians away, they'll use it as an excuse to declare war?

Perhaps, sir. And then we might have the Kalaxenan and the Namarian fleets to deal with.

OK, here's what we'll do. We'll let a few of them stay. Just as a PR exercise. They did say they'd be eternally grateful for the smallest crumb of succour – so that's what we'll give them.

Brilliant, sir! Then the Kalaxenans can't say a word against us either!


And so the Namarians were offered three of the most barren and isolated islands on Sadatoni IV. It was pitiful to smell their enthusiastic gratitude as they crammed a ridiculous number of colonists onto these inhospitable rocks. President Shushk could hardly believe his sensors. But, he assured himself, that's all they had asked for. He did not feel an ounce of pity for these wretches. That tiny bead of snot dribbling from his olfactories was just caused by a bit of dust in the air, surely. He brushed it away quickly.

================================================
Meanwhile, the Noxious Fleet now consisted of no less than thirty-four Gagger-class corvettes, and it was time to see what they could do when pitted against a real enemy. The Rogveddi system was extremely close to the border of Kalaxenan space and harboured not one but two habitable planets. Unfortunately, the first attempt to explore Rogveddi had failed due to the presence of a small fleet of mining drones. Admiral “Hardnose” Garma was therefore given his first mission – to clear Rogveddi so that one of the survey ships could get in and explore it properly.

It was a long way from Ganlargo to Rogveddi, so it was something of an anticlimax when the Fleet jumped into the system and discovered that the mining drones had disappeared. Evidently the Kalaxenans had got there first. Still, the system was now in Ganlarev space, so GCS Sniffer was ordered in to check it out.

Admiral Garma was ordered to the nearby Samnivik system, where a similar fleet of drones had been spotted. This time he was not disappointed. The drones were definitely still there – but not for long. The Gagger-class corvettes did not yet even have anything as sophisticated as shields or armour, but Hardnose Garma was not someone to let a small detail like that hold him back. The Fleet went straight in to the attack and the historic Battle of Samnivik was soon over.


2224-drones.jpg

Die, drone scum!

President Shushk was delighted with the outcome of the battle. True, three Ganlarev corvettes had been lost, but this seemed like a small price to pay for a major victory. He felt so confident, in fact, that when a Kalaxenan survey ship was reported to be nosing around the Rogveddi system at the same time as GCS Sniffer, he sent a terse communication to President Cax: “Our borders are now closed”. The Kalaxenans did not answer. They simply left.

The Namarian fleet also left soon after this, but their leaving was slightly more amicable. President Shushk told himself he was glad to see the back of them, but for some reason it seemed strangely comforting that some of them were still there on Sadatoni IV. He couldn't get that thought out of his head: “You have a spiritual aroma about you”. No one had ever said that to him before.

The Namarians who had settled on Sadatoni IV were all convinced xenophiles, but a Re-education Campaign had of course been put in place early on to try to convince them that this was an aberrant viewpoint. A few had soon come around to a more Ganlarev way of thinking, which meant they were considerably happier living in the Concordat. These Namarians were given a special reward. A new colony ship was commissioned on Sadatoni IV, the GCS Homeless Wanderer. Its destination was the arid world of Regganus IV. There they would perhaps be even happier. And with any luck their compatriots might follow them later, leaving Sadatoni IV to the Ganlarev. And the neolithics, of course, although no one could actually now remember where they had put them.


2228-galaxy.jpg

The Ganlarev Concordat in 2228 after the colonization of Regganus IV​
 
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stnylan

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Well now, that is something of a turn-up for the books. But I did have to chuckle at a spiritual aroma. I do think this President is quite smitten.
 

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Well now, that is something of a turn-up for the books. But I did have to chuckle at a spiritual aroma. I do think this President is quite smitten.
Yes, President Shushk seems strangely affected by these visitors. But what will it do for his ratings in the opinion polls?

One more installment for the time being - and a Happy Christmas to one and all!
 

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A Spot of Sabre Rattling

Last time we left the Ganlarev Concordat bravely standing up to the neighbourhood bully, the Kalaxenan Confederated Systems. With the closing of the Concordat's borders to Kalaxenan ships, if the Kalaxenans were ever going to retaliate, then this was surely the moment. But they didn't. The stench of the Ganlarev must certainly have been getting up their reptilian nostrils, but they just had to put up with it.

This was of course the result of President Shushk's wise decision to build up the Noxious Fleet to maximum capacity and keep it there. And there were other ships coming into being in the Ganlarev shipyards during these years. The GCS Elbow Grease was now having difficulty keeping up with its construction orders, so a second constructor ship, the GCS It'll Cost You Though, was built in 2228. Then there was the colony ship GCS One Way Trip which carried a crew of “sardines” to colonize Fulaz III. And finally, the Noxious Fleet was reinforced with a steady stream of brand new Suffocator-class destroyers, built in the yards of Banthary II.

As for territorial expansion, the two survey ships Sniffer and Snuffler now began exploring the space to spinward of Evaggimar where the way was not blocked by the Valdari. In 2230 shoals of Space Amoebas were found in the Pollux and in Sceptrum systems, perhaps one of them being the very gang of thugs which had destroyed the research station in Samderaan. But now, the Fleet was ready to deal with them.

First though, it was time for another presidential election. President Shushk was of course seeking re-election, but his predecessor, and current governor of the Samderaan Sector, Governor Bagglosch, was standing against him. It was a close-fought campaign, with many a heady speech wafting through the atmospheres of the various Ganlarev worlds, but in the end Governor Bagglosch won by a narrow margin. He was still a champion of the people, and they recognized his vital role in quelling Qvefoz rebellions and helping to deal with the Namarian crisis.

Only a few weeks into his term, President Bagglosch received an incoming feed from Governor Glabonsch. She had been appointed as his successor in the Samderaan Sector, and now she had some alarming news. It seemed like the news from Samderaan was always unwelcome.


Governor Glabonsch, it's good to smell you. I trust the Qvefoz aren't giving you too much trouble.

No President Bagglosch, everything is calm on Samderaan IV.

Excellent – and what about Sadatoni IV. Are the Namarians getting any happier these days?

I'm afraid not sir. Still as xenophile as ever. Nor are they taking the bait and migrating to Regganus III. They are a very odd race, it has to be said.

Yes indeed. And what of the Kalaxenans – any communications from our delightful neighbours?

Well sir, that's what I was wanting to report. They have just stolen Rogveddi.

What!? Why, the filthy vermin! That system is crawling with mineral resources, not to mention the two habitable planets!

Exactly sir, it's a major loss.

Well here's the good news, Governor. We are now officially rated Equivalent to those xenophile meddlers, so no doubt it will soon be time to end this charade, as they say.


2231-equivalent.jpg
That's excellent news, sir. Should we expect the Fleet down here on Samderaan IV some time soon then?

I think so – they have some mindless jellyfish to deal with first, but look out for old Hardnose down your way in the next year or so.

Very good, sir.

And in the mean time, keep a close watch on Rogveddi, Governor Glabonsch. We may yet be able to steal it back, and if we do, we'll be in there with a Frontier Outpost as soon as possible.

I'll do that sir!


In fact, President Bagglosch was absolutely right. In less than a year the border had drifted back towards the Kalaxenans and Rogveddi was a Ganlarev system once more. The GCS It'll Cost You Though was immediately sent there to build a Frontier Outpost, while building was begun on a new colony ship, the GCS Get Stuffed a special message for the Kalaxenans which the sardines would deliver when the ship made landfall on the tropical world of Rogveddi III.

Back on the spinward front, the Noxious Fleet, now bolstered with seven Suffocator-class destroyers went into action against the space amoebas lurking in Sceptrum. It was another resounding victory.


2231-amoebas.jpg

Die, blobs of filth!

In 2232 the Get Stuffed was completed and set off for the Rogveddi system. The following year, after a rather nerve-racking voyage, the Ganlarev colony of Rogveddi III was established and ownership of the Rogveddi system was finally settled. Not only that, but the systems of Ramman and Haribas, both of which boasted several mining and research stations, passed from Kalaxenan to Ganlarev space. It was final proof that the neighbourhood bully was finally cowed when the Kalaxenans responded to this act of border aggression with complete silence.

2233-get-stuffed.jpg

Rogveddi III, now affectionately known as “Get Stuffed”, as seen from its new spaceport
Its ocean-covered moon, “Get Stuffed Islands” can also be seen
 
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stnylan

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Well definitely time to be ready to teach those cursed creatures who is boss!
 

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Progress! More space to spread thinly!