Chapter Thirty Seven - The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Gunfire
As war continues with Italy the government is given some most unwelcome news from the cartographers who report that they have recently added some new font to the map. Usually such news would be cause for celebration of course, but sadly in this case the font is not Sokot.
Instead it belongs to both the newly formed North German Federation and Russia respectively, both nations having established considerable colonial holdings in Africa. Such colonisation entirely unacceptable, as both nations are bringing the dreadful effects of horrible map colour and democratic, socially inclusive, competent governance to Africa. This unwarranted colonisation clearly despicable, the government vow to make both nations regret their unjustified expansion at the earliest opportunity.
With this in mind the government quickly order the colonisation of Zambezi. Sokoto's colonisation of Africa entirely justified in comparison to the North German Federation and Russia, as Sokoto is bringing the great benefits of a wonderfully attractive map colour and corruption, backbreaking labour and incompetent rule to the land.
A couple of weeks later and the government is given yet further bad news from the cartographers.
Sokoto sadly not gaining any new font following peace with Italy. Happily though she has gained a new neighbour, Austria providing a warm welcome to Sokoto by massing heavily armed soldiers at the newly formed border between both nations. Naturally the government are delighted with so warm and friendly a welcome, it clear that Sokoto's reputation as a peaceful nation precedes her.
With Sokoto now at peace for the first time in years the government cannot help but think they have forgotten about something.
Oh.
It now eight months since Sokoto ended her war with the Netherlands, these troops were of course not simply abandoned in hostile territory, forgotten about by the army. No, the army, uhm, purposefully left them there following their astonishingly poor showing during the war. The army wishing for them to suffer from attrition whilst stationed in the Netherlands so as to toughen them up and make them more receptive to suffering casualties. Weakening an army ever the best way to strengthen it.
[Uh, yes, I intentionally left this large force in the Netherlands following the end of the war so as to toughen them up. It was not that I simply forgot about them. Certainly not. *cough*]
Whilst Sokoto's attrition ravaged forces begin returning from the Netherlands the government is informed of a worrying domestic situation a month later.
The government, after considering the plight of the hard worked, underpaid, malnourished workers attempting to make their difficult lives a little bit more bearable through gaining some improvements in their working conditions via creation of a union, quickly side with the wealthy capitalists. It quite clear that the whining peasant oiks already enjoy wonderful working conditions, the work merely requiring backbreaking, dangerous labour, they have no right to attempt to create a union.
As the army is sent in to 'persuade' the workers to stop their foolishness in daring to attempt to make use of their legal right to form a union, the government is given some pleasing news.
The changes made to schooling a year ago proving remarkably successful, Sokot education is no longer proving a divisive issue for minority cultures.
A couple of weeks later, and with Sokot students causing mayhem and promoting rebellion like never before, the government are informed that the troops left in the Netherlands have returned to mainland Sokoto. Said troops inexplicably irked at having been abandoned-uh, intentionally left in hostile territory, the government hurriedly send forth the diplomats. Keen as they are to keep these troops busy in a war with another nation, rather than busy in a rebellion against themselves.
The diplomats return a few days later quivering wrecks. All had been going well, their Austrian counterparts surprisingly gracious about receiving the deceleration of war, until one of the Sokot diplomats remarked that Mozart's skill as a composer nearly matched Kumbari Rumfa's skill as a poet. The Austrian diplomats surprisingly taking so wonderful a compliment about their composer rather poorly.
As Sokot ships hurriedly retreat to harbour, Austria's formidable fleet more than a match for even Sokoto's mighty navy, battle is met all along the narrow border shared by both nations.
In Parma Austria has intelligently given command to Remmele, an officer skilled in defence but utterly useless in attack. Whilst the eleven year old Theodor Wittmann has been appointed to command of the Austrian army in Ferrara. The Austrian force under his command having to cease all fighting at 9pm daily, this the bedtime for their uncommonly young general. And in Modena the workshy shirker, Eisner, is leading the Austrian force. Or rather, a lowly subordinate under his command is leading the force, Eisner feeling it too much work to do so himself.
The Sokot army can only applaud such genius on Austria's part. Her having appointed such highly skilled generals to command of these attacks, each of which is being made over a river into entrenched Sokot positions, clearly a most intelligent move.
Indeed, so skilled are Austria's officers in comparison to the worryingly competent generals Sokoto has appointed to command in these battles, the only crumb of comfort for the army is that Austria's forces do not greatly outnumber Sokoto's. There only one hundred and twenty or so Sokot brigades assigned to this theatre, defeat for Sokoto would be near inevitable were Austria able to call upon more men.
Ah.
This could prove difficult.
[Difficult indeed, as I truly do have only around one hundred and twenty brigades stationed in Northern Italy. I did not expect Austria to be able to call upon such large reserves.]
A couple of months later and the government is given the much dreaded news that Sokoto has eased to victory in these early battles, suffering a pitiful number of casualties in comparison to Austria. Austria's opening attacks having proven as devastatingly successful as feared.
With Kumbari Rumfa having performed particularly poorly in his command of the battle of Parma, he hurriedly writes a new poem in a desperate bid to restore his shattered reputation;
In Northern Italy I fight,
The enemy a most tenacious foe,
It not until long into the night,
That the waiter finally relents and provides some extra gateau.
This but one of many deprivations I must endure,
When fighting bravely for my nation,
All soldiers suffering whilst on tour,
I cannot even find a woman of negotiable affection to relieve my frustration.
Casualties the army suffers without end,
My own dreadful injury suffered miles behind the front,
To a subordinate I courageously delegated command so as to allow my injury time to mend,
A most dreadful paper cut I suffered whilst tallying my latest peasant hunt.
A few days later, and with the public unsurprisingly delighted by Rumfa's epic poetry, this happily helping to gloss over the recent horrendous battle results, the government and army are left hugely worried by reports from the front.
In a clever move Austria is sending recently defeated, exhausted and utterly demoralised forces straight back into battle rather than giving them time to rest. Such a strategy most cunning and bold, it is sure to bring Austria victory soon.
Sadly this proves the case a few months later, Sokoto suffering a horrendous defeat.
Horrendous not so much because the battle was lost, but instead because even when Sokoto is defeated the impressive Austria manage to suffer far more casualties. With Rumfa once again to blame for this shockingly poor showing, he quickly rushes out another poem;
A most dreadful loss,
I couldn't give a toss.
Both the public and the government instantly won over by such excellent poetry, there is nonetheless fear that the war is lost.
Austria stands on the cusp of victory following this battle, as with Sokoto's routed forces horribly outnumbered if Austria but advances into Massa she will likely secure an easy victory thereby shattering Sokoto's defensive line entirely, this allowing her to surround and pick off the remaining Sokot forces in Northern Italy at will. Failing that, if she simply uses her forces in Parma to make a flanking attack on Sokoto's already hard pressed army in Modena, this too will probably bring her a swift victory and lead to the annihilation of Sokoto's forces in the theatre.
Defeat close, the Sokot army nervously wait for Austria to exploit her breakthrough at Parma.
Instead of winning the war in an instant Austria cleverly pulls back her forces in Parma, preferring to leave Sokoto's routed forces in Massa to rest and recuperate, and marches all of her forces east. Said forces suffering attrition in Brescia and Verona as they move eastwards, her army too large for the land to support it, Austria's forces marching to Ferrara in support of her attack upon the entrenched and rested Sokot army there.
Such a move astoundingly brilliant, Austria is proving a most difficult opponent.
Whilst Austria is busy doing her best to lose the war the government is given some interesting news a couple of days later, as they are informed that Crete is now an independent nation. Crete having gained her freedom from the perfidious Prussia during the upheaval caused by Prussia's creation of the North German Federation.
Crete now free, Sokoto sends the diplomats to congratulate her on having achieved independence. The diplomats ship gets no closer than a mile from Crete's coast before it is suddenly fired upon. For some reason Crete is none too eager to receive a visit from Sokoto's diplomats, claiming as she does that they only ever deliver decelerations of war. Such claims clearly ridiculous, the government object strongly to such slander, the ever peaceful Sokoto abhorring war.
A month later and Sokoto enhances her reputation as a peace loving nation as she secures a convincing victory over Austria at Modena.
With Austria wisely having decided against following up her victory at Parma a month before, when Sokoto's forces were in disarray and victory was thus easily achievable, in favour of instead marching her troops to the battle of Ferrara, where they are now toiling against a strong Sokot force, Austria has left a large gap in her own lines which Sokoto has been able to easily exploit. This leading to the encirclement and destruction of Austria's forces in Modena, Austria's army in Ferrara about to be surrounded as well.
A few weeks later and over one hundred and fifty Austrian brigades surrender as Sokoto emerges victorious at Ferrara.
In having not only passed up a wonderful chance to secure victory in this war following the battle of Parma, but in also having assured her own defeat by leaving a gaping hole in her lines, too many of Austria's troops bogged down in Ferrara for her to stop Sokoto from encircling her position, Austria truly has shown astonishing brilliance in having so impressively snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.
Sokoto can only salute such an awe-inspiring performance, the many casualties Austria has suffered thus far simply more proof that she is a most gifted and worthy foe, Austria's eventual victory in this war seems a foregone conclusion.