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Fear mighty Belgium! (brandishes axe).
Is it just me, or was the AI exceptionally incompetent even by AI standards in that war?
Is it just me, or was the AI exceptionally incompetent even by AI standards in that war?
I know your infamy is really high, which is cool because i usally get pwned if i have high infamy.. The first time my infamy went over(I was France and was a newb), NGF and GB kicked my butt.
It was a horrible war (so few casualties against the French! The shame...), but the increase in font size in Africa made it all worth it, think. It was fortunate that the war was ended before Belgium could unleash the full strength of its fury. Sokoto dodged a bullet there.
That shows the importance of avoiding direct land borders with GPs when you plan to go over the limit, something I hadn't known before this AAR.
The genius of French and British amphibious invasions is unparalleled, even compared with Sokot incompetence. Could this be the beginning of the Sokot modern malaise, in which Sokot intellectuals fret about losing their rightful place as the most incompetent nation in the world? Only time will tell.
great stuff as ever, your enemies usage of cunning diversionary attacks (ok that utilise their entire armies) will be a subject of much study down the years.
that final font just makes it all worthwhile, so a few people want decent wages, votes, an end to war ... pah, you have gained all that really matters ... a properly dangling font
that final font just makes it all worthwhile, so a few people want decent wages, votes, an end to war ... pah, you have gained all that really matters ... a properly dangling font
Impressive stuff as ever, I wonder how far towards total global domination the wonderful Sokoto nation will be able to go!
This is nothing but a great AAR. I shall be following the Sokot Empire on its path towards world domination (or may be towards the biggest uprising in Vicky 2 ever) 
Thank you profusely for the replies!
alhoward - Indeed they have! Alas though more recent peace deals haven't proven quite so rewarding, as this update will sadly show.
NapoleonComple - The AI was nearing Sokot levels of incompetence in that war! I still have no idea as to why France declared war upon Italy when she did. It made no real difference to the outcome, by that stage France was already well beaten, but that is rather why I find it so confusing. France was in no state to consider war with another nation a good idea.
Admittedly whilst generally the AI did struggle it succeeded in one area, Britain and France's navy proving surprisingly more powerful than Sokoto's, the blockade enforced by them was sadly very effective.
alxeu - Thank you for the kind words (a bribe is en route!). As Selzro has kindly said, I learned by chance whilst playing as Sokoto that it is largely based upon whether a nation has a direct land border with you which will decide if they punish your going over the infamy limit. This can be avoided if you have significantly larger forces than your neighbour, as they will then not dare attack you even if you go well over the infamy limit. Thus with careful planning (something I failed in rather miserably during this AAR, blundering into war with Egypt entirely by accident) you can go over the infamy limit without ever being punished for it.
Selzro - A most horrific war indeed! Thankfully there has been a slight improvement in the performance of Sokoto's military, the navy at least performing brilliantly, as this update will show. This just as well, Sokoto requiring her military to be in the best of form, trying as she is to bring an end to that threat to world peace, Belgium.
Xenophon13 - You address a concern which is troubling many a Sokot civilian. How fortunes have changed, mere decades ago the Sokot army left the rest of the world laughing uncontrollably at their incompetence and now nations tremble in fear instead. Sad, sad days. Thankfully the performance of the navy is proving of some comfort to Sokoto's citizens, as this update will show.
loki100 - A great many thanks for the kind words (another bribe is on the way!). How right you are, font size is the only thing of true importance, concerns such as acceptable wages, political equality and peace entirely unimportant considerations.
Ogrecrusher - Many thanks for the kind words (your bribe is in the post!). Hopefully Sokoto will be able to liberate as much of the world as possible, bringing the great benefits of incompetence and a love of all things pink as she does so!
Stiefler - Thank you profusely for the kind words (a bribe is on the way!). An uprising seems more likely than world domination at present!
diegoami - Thank you for the kind words (your bribe is en route!).
alhoward - Indeed they have! Alas though more recent peace deals haven't proven quite so rewarding, as this update will sadly show.
NapoleonComple - The AI was nearing Sokot levels of incompetence in that war! I still have no idea as to why France declared war upon Italy when she did. It made no real difference to the outcome, by that stage France was already well beaten, but that is rather why I find it so confusing. France was in no state to consider war with another nation a good idea.
Admittedly whilst generally the AI did struggle it succeeded in one area, Britain and France's navy proving surprisingly more powerful than Sokoto's, the blockade enforced by them was sadly very effective.
alxeu - Thank you for the kind words (a bribe is en route!). As Selzro has kindly said, I learned by chance whilst playing as Sokoto that it is largely based upon whether a nation has a direct land border with you which will decide if they punish your going over the infamy limit. This can be avoided if you have significantly larger forces than your neighbour, as they will then not dare attack you even if you go well over the infamy limit. Thus with careful planning (something I failed in rather miserably during this AAR, blundering into war with Egypt entirely by accident) you can go over the infamy limit without ever being punished for it.
Selzro - A most horrific war indeed! Thankfully there has been a slight improvement in the performance of Sokoto's military, the navy at least performing brilliantly, as this update will show. This just as well, Sokoto requiring her military to be in the best of form, trying as she is to bring an end to that threat to world peace, Belgium.
Xenophon13 - You address a concern which is troubling many a Sokot civilian. How fortunes have changed, mere decades ago the Sokot army left the rest of the world laughing uncontrollably at their incompetence and now nations tremble in fear instead. Sad, sad days. Thankfully the performance of the navy is proving of some comfort to Sokoto's citizens, as this update will show.
loki100 - A great many thanks for the kind words (another bribe is on the way!). How right you are, font size is the only thing of true importance, concerns such as acceptable wages, political equality and peace entirely unimportant considerations.
Ogrecrusher - Many thanks for the kind words (your bribe is in the post!). Hopefully Sokoto will be able to liberate as much of the world as possible, bringing the great benefits of incompetence and a love of all things pink as she does so!
Stiefler - Thank you profusely for the kind words (a bribe is on the way!). An uprising seems more likely than world domination at present!
diegoami - Thank you for the kind words (your bribe is en route!).
Chapter Thirty Five - A Lowlands Blow
Three days after peace is agreed with the British led coalition the government hurriedly enact further political reform.
Nonsensical rumours that the government quickly passed said reform out of a desperate wish to stave off rebellion clearly a scurrilous lie, instead, as ever, the government passed this reform out of a desire to further political equality within Sokoto. The reform allowing as it does for trade unions of all political affiliations to be created, provided said trade unions fully support the Conservative party and no other political organisation.
Following Sokoto's recent war with Britain, France and the unstoppable Belgium the government have come to the realisation that Sokoto's closest ally, Argentina, will never be safe from warmongers such as Belgium unless fully protected by Sokoto. Sokoto never a nation to shirk the responsibilities that being an ally entails, the diplomats are sent forth.
They return limping heavily a few weeks later, covered in bruises. Having delivered the deceleration of war to their Argentinian counterparts the diplomats were suddenly and inexplicably attacked by said counterparts after stating, 'Sokoto requires no thanks for proving so indispensable an ally to your nation.'
Whilst Sokoto's army begins providing protection and aid to Argentina by ravaging her lands and violently crushing her small army, the academics report that they have made a number of discoveries a few weeks later.
With the discovery of rubber vulcanisation leading to a great growth in 'wood' within Sokoto, this courtesy of rubber catsuits and bondage outfits instantly becoming far more common within the Empire, there is relief that mechanical saws have been developed to deal with said growth in 'wood'.
It now almost five years since the passing of the great poet Kumbari Kabe, the government is given wonderful news when the army announce that they have finally identified his successor.
The government's pleasure quickly turns to shock when they learn that the successor is not in any way related to the legendary Kabe family. Not only this, Kumbari Rumfa looks supiciously competent a general to be considered Sokoto's new poet laureate. With both the government and the citizens of the Empire thus hugely skeptical as to Rumfa's skill in writing poetry their fears are soon allayed following the release of Rumfa's first stunning piece of work;
I am a poet,
And I know it.
The brilliance of this epic poem having reassured both the government and the people of the Empire as to Rumfa's unsurpassed ability in writing poetry, they are soon treated to yet another of his fantastic poems a few weeks later.
Rumfa writing the poem soon after a successful hunting expedition in Ajdir;
Around Ajdir I stride,
Flowers, plants and insects I ignore,
Shotgun ever at my side,
For I hunt with my twelve gauge bore.
Not for me the rare animal who looks suspiciously like a man dressed in a suit,
Nor elephant, lion or tiger,
Soon a trophy I will have to upon my wall put,
My foe is far more wilier.
There a twig does suddenly snap,
My prey will soon lie beneath the turf,
My quarry spotted I turn it to pap,
Peasant hunting ever the most enjoyable sport on planet Earth.
Whilst Sokot nobles reach for their rifles and Sokot peasants go into hiding, many unsurprisingly inspired by Rumfa's latest amazing work, there is puzzling news for the government a week later.
Naturally the government scoff at these ludicrous claims that Sokoto ill-treats those living within her colonies. With experience of famine, drought, forced enlistment, backbreaking labour and use as prey in hunting expeditions but a few of the many wonderful features of Sokot colonial life, it is clear those residing within her colonies are living a life of luxury.
A few months later and Sokoto's alliance with Argentina is strengthened considerably.
Finally Argentina is safe. She need no longer worry about falling prey to a warmonger such as Belgium, she now enjoys Sokoto's full protection. Following Sokoto's stunning act of kindness in proving the most devoted of allies to Argentina by brutally annexing her, she is left dumbfounded when Argentina repays her kind act by inexplicably failing to increase Sokoto's font size in South America. Argentina's ingratitude truly staggering.
With the government still coming to terms with Argentina's baffling betrayal there is some pleasing news a few months later as the academics, who are proving surprisingly industrious for once, report that another discovery has been made.
The discovery of nitroglycerin coming at a most welcome time as Sokoto's army and navy, following Italy's lead, have been busy shelling locals in the Ayacucho area recently so as to display the great strength of Sokoto's armed forces to the world. The ability to destroy civilian buildings ever a clear sign of a most powerful army.
Thankfully with nitroglycerin having been discovered the government is able to avoid a rebellion in Ayacucho, residents of the province having proven surprisingly unhappy at being used as target practice, by claiming that rather than the army firing upon the city it was instead tests with nitroglycerin which were being made, hence the explosions.
Two weeks later and the government make an order for a number of magnifying glasses.
Said magnifying glasses required so as to read Sokoto's new acquired font following peace with the Ottomans. Whilst the size of this new font is regrettably small the Prime Minister is surprisingly cheerful about acquiring it nonetheless. As the Prime Minister is quick to remind the cabinet, much to his relief he has long found in life it is not the size that matters but instead what you do with it that counts.
With Sokoto now at peace for the first time in many years, at last war exhaustion begins to drop. The government quickly come to the realisation that peace is quite impossible at present though, with Belgium still terrorising the world no nation is safe until she is defeated. Sokoto would be entirely remiss in her duties as an internationally renowned keeper of the peace were she to simply sit back and watch as Belgium conquers the world. The government feel compelled to thus offer aid to the Netherlands, who have long been menaced by neighbouring Belgium. The diplomats are sent forth.
They return several days later quite terrified. Said terror caused when one of the diplomats, after having delivered the deceleration of war to their Dutch counterparts, rather irked the leading Dutch diplomat by asking if he would be able to explore the 'netherlands' with said Dutch diplomat's wife.
The government is not in the least bit surprised when they are told that Britain has failed to honour her alliance with the Netherlands, Britain doubtless fully realising the danger Belgium pose to the world they have likely realised the wisdom in thus allowing Sokoto to aid the Netherlands. There is some surprise however when the government is informed that the Netherlands are employing a revolutionary new strategy against Sokoto.
Unlike the noted naval powers of Italy, Japan and Great Britain, the Netherlands are actually contesting Sokoto's amphibious landings upon her homelands. This innovative and groundbreaking new strategy is nonetheless doomed to failure of course, the Dutch navy no match for Sokoto's ramshackle collection of barely floating improvised rafts.
A few weeks later and as expected Sokoto's navy has secured a thumping victory over the Dutch fleet at the Coast of Holland, all of Sokoto's soldiers safely reaching shore.
With a Sokot fleet securing a convincing victory at the Coast of Holland, so too at Dogger Bank a few days later.
The junior officer in charge of Sokoto's fleet at Dogger Bank rightly lauded the Empire over for his somehow managing to secure so impressive a result despite greatly outnumbering the Dutch fleet.
The government is left hugely relieved following such a strong showing from Sokoto's navy. As Sokoto's recent performance in wars with France, Brazil, the Ottomans and so forth have been hugely embarrassing, Sokoto suffering nowhere near enough casualties, at last it seems as if Sokoto's army and navy are returning to the right kind of form.
Delight at the navy's securing these impressive successes soon turns to slight dismay less than a week later.
Whilst Sokoto's army has suffered an encouraging number of casualties considering they faced an outnumbered force with no cannon, there is no hiding from the fact that this is still a rather poor result.
As news of this latest lacklustre performance from the army spreads through the Empire there is a sudden surge in the number of men wishing to enlist.
With the Empire suffering from the constant threat of rebellion news of this battle, and reports detailing how few casualties were suffered in it, has led many men to come to the conclusion that life within the army, even with the constant danger of suffering horrific siege injuries and battlefield wounds, is still far preferable, and far less dangerous, than life as a civilian. The addition of a pink cape, with attractive green and gold stripes running down it, to the already irresistible army uniform proving a considerable incentive to new recruits as well.
A few days later and research of 'Interchangeable Parts' comes to an end.
The newly developed self-assembly kits for forts, cannons, trenches and ships are proving as strong and durable as expected. Said self-assembled constructions able to withstand light breezes, gentle taps and beams of sunshine with only a ninety nine percent rate of failure.
Following the Sokot navy's hugely impressive showing in the current war with Holland, in stark contrast with the poor performance from Sokoto's army in said war, the government order the academics to next begin research of 'Clipper Designs'. The government of the opinion that whilst Sokoto's navy is undeniably already strong, no other navy in the world able to boast of having suffered so many inexplicable defeats, it could nonetheless be improved.
With the Netherlands army crushed a few days later, following another abysmal display from Sokoto's armed forces, the army begin the much dreaded task of besieging the Netherlands.
Numerous soldiers soon suffering dreadful injuries such as ink stains on their hands and uniforms caused by their writing letters to home reporting on how horrific war is, due to the lack of casualties and horrendous siege conditions which need be endured.
The government is given some pleasing news a couple of months later.
Sokoto has acquired a new national focus, there now over three million citizens of Sokoto's primary Hausa culture residing within the Empire. That Sokoto's population continues to quickly grow is unsurprising considering the constant advances Sokoto is making in the field of medicine. Introduction of arsenic, mercury and nightshade to the creation of most Sokot medication the latest impressive advance.
The government instantly make use of the new national focus to begin colonisation of East Angola, keen as they are to provide yet more lucky citizens with the benefits of Sokot colonial life.
A month later and the government is informed that some new training for Sokoto's army has proven a success.
The training having taught Sokoto's courageous officers the benefits of delegating responsibility to subordinates. Which has led to many officers now surrendering command to subordinates during battle so that they can bravely defend settlements located miles away from the battlefield itself. With such delegation Sokoto's valiant officers now find themselves with more free time to consider hugely important issues. Important issues such as what they plan on having for dinner.
With Italy having provided Sokoto with invaluable assistance in the recent war with Britain, France and the nefarious Belgium the government have come to the conclusion that it is only right for Sokoto to reward Italy for providing such considerable assistance.
The diplomats are sent forth.
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A new poetic golden age dawns in Sokoto! And it looks like you're only a few wars away from writing "Sokot Europe" on the map...
The golden age has already happened. A platinum age of Sokot poetry has begun. Also 1.4 million communists is pretty impressive for 1883 is it not? Peasant hunting should bring that down to about 1 million in a few weeks.
It cannot be said Sokoto isn't reformist
for we have a million comunist
I now go to reform some faces
with my two dozen twelve gauges
It cannot be said Sokoto isn't reformist
for we have a million comunist
I now go to reform some faces
with my two dozen twelve gauges
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well that was an update filled with such dedication to international goodwill as you managed to 'protect' so much of the world from the evil Belgians. Great relief to see the critical role of Imperial Poet has been filled and it looks like Rumfa has inherited all the talent of his predecessors.
now:
goes a long way to explaining the construction of a certain building in Edinburgh ...
now:
goes a long way to explaining the construction of a certain building in Edinburgh ...
Just one question - are Sokot poems better or worse in the original Hausa?
I'm also pleased to see that it's not just me who rolls through games and then hits a point where you get dragged into a war against a naval power despite not having researched any naval techs.
I'm also pleased to see that it's not just me who rolls through games and then hits a point where you get dragged into a war against a naval power despite not having researched any naval techs.
With all these "incompetent" conquests, the claims of Sokot incompetence is starting to seem a little hollow.
I don't think you're being incompetent at all. I think you're secretly being... competent! I believe this is Sokot propaganda to make Sokot seem incompetent when in fact it is actually a highly competent, expansionist power capable of going about world conquest in a highly organised manner and in defiance of the combined efforts of the great powers of the world.
(Squints) I've got my eye on you...
I don't think you're being incompetent at all. I think you're secretly being... competent! I believe this is Sokot propaganda to make Sokot seem incompetent when in fact it is actually a highly competent, expansionist power capable of going about world conquest in a highly organised manner and in defiance of the combined efforts of the great powers of the world.
(Squints) I've got my eye on you...
Sokots in bondage gear... Now there's a mental image I could have lived without.
Are you going to take the Dutch East Indies, or is this war just for their African holdings?
Are you going to take the Dutch East Indies, or is this war just for their African holdings?
Thank you profusely for the replies!
Selzro - How right you are, Kumbari Rumfa is unsurpassed in his brilliance when it comes to poetry! Thankfully the day does indeed draw ever nearer for when 'Sokot Europe' is proudly displayed across the map.
Caezaire - Exactly so, Rumfa's epic poetry has reached new heights with its brilliance! Rather than describing the high number of communists within Sokoto as impressive (the number is still growing quickly), I'd instead use the word 'surprising'. Quite why anyone would consider rebelling against the stupendous rule of the Conservatives entirely beyond me. As you say, peasant hunting will soon lower the number though!
Of reforms Sokoto does indeed have a lot,
The government preferring concession to the masses rather than being beaten into snot,
Happily though many of said masses will soon be shot,
Peasant hunting now in full swing since the weather is hot.
loki100 - As you say, Sokoto is nothing if not a nation which provides aid to struggling countries the world over.
Quite right too regarding the construction of the Scottish Parliament, it very obvious that was built to the same high standard as Sokot self-assembled constructions. If the trams ever do get built (some hope), hopefully they too meet the same high standard.
Dewirix - Sokot poems are a most wondrous read in any language!
As you know the naval side of things is never my forte in Paradox game (nor the non-naval side of things come to that), hence why I try to ignore everything naval for as long as possible. Following war with the Netherlands I did finally realise at least some research was desirable!
NapoleonComple - I was beginning to fear Sokoto had lost her touch with regards to incompetence too, but thankfully the navy's recent showing in the war against the Netherlands, and the army's showing in the coming war with Italy have dispelled any such doubts! That and the fact that Sokoto does currently have something of a rebel problem due to alarmingly high war exhaustion, which shows that Sokoto remains as happily incompetent as ever!
Vaya con Queso - As ever Sokoto is attempting to liberate as much as she can in her war with the Netherlands, it her duty to cover as much of the world in her glorious pink and magnificent font as possible!
Selzro - How right you are, Kumbari Rumfa is unsurpassed in his brilliance when it comes to poetry! Thankfully the day does indeed draw ever nearer for when 'Sokot Europe' is proudly displayed across the map.
Caezaire - Exactly so, Rumfa's epic poetry has reached new heights with its brilliance! Rather than describing the high number of communists within Sokoto as impressive (the number is still growing quickly), I'd instead use the word 'surprising'. Quite why anyone would consider rebelling against the stupendous rule of the Conservatives entirely beyond me. As you say, peasant hunting will soon lower the number though!
Of reforms Sokoto does indeed have a lot,
The government preferring concession to the masses rather than being beaten into snot,
Happily though many of said masses will soon be shot,
Peasant hunting now in full swing since the weather is hot.
loki100 - As you say, Sokoto is nothing if not a nation which provides aid to struggling countries the world over.
Quite right too regarding the construction of the Scottish Parliament, it very obvious that was built to the same high standard as Sokot self-assembled constructions. If the trams ever do get built (some hope), hopefully they too meet the same high standard.
Dewirix - Sokot poems are a most wondrous read in any language!
As you know the naval side of things is never my forte in Paradox game (nor the non-naval side of things come to that), hence why I try to ignore everything naval for as long as possible. Following war with the Netherlands I did finally realise at least some research was desirable!
NapoleonComple - I was beginning to fear Sokoto had lost her touch with regards to incompetence too, but thankfully the navy's recent showing in the war against the Netherlands, and the army's showing in the coming war with Italy have dispelled any such doubts! That and the fact that Sokoto does currently have something of a rebel problem due to alarmingly high war exhaustion, which shows that Sokoto remains as happily incompetent as ever!
Vaya con Queso - As ever Sokoto is attempting to liberate as much as she can in her war with the Netherlands, it her duty to cover as much of the world in her glorious pink and magnificent font as possible!
Chapter Thirty Six - Poetugal
As Sokoto's far superior army vastly outnumbers Italy's the government have come to the sad conclusion that victory will be easily achieved in this war, few casualties expected, it quite clear that nothing can go wrong.
Oh. Well, nothing beyond a curse more than a millennia old being invoked that is. Naturally news of this curse does not worry the government in the least, it not as if Sokoto is a nation of mere tomb raiders. The pyramid currently sitting in the Prime Minister's garden a Sokot made piece, and most certainly not one of the many pyramids which have gone missing from Egypt since Sokoto began excavating there.
Whilst entirely unworried by such supersiticous mumbo jumbo the government do decide to flee, uh, relocate to Sokot South America for the next few months. This done so as to escape vengeful mummies, uhm, so as to grace Sokoto's South American citizens directly with their wise rule.
As the government ready their escape they quickly pass a social reform so as to placate the simpleminded fools within the Empire who have been taken in by the curse nonsense.
The populace quickly forgetting about the threat of a curse following the provision of low health care, as they instead begin worrying about having a limb amputated.
A month later and there is some hugely welcome news for the still hiding government.
Not only has Sokoto secured a convincing victory in Rome, research of 'Clipper Design' has also come to an end. The benefits of the Sokot army's recent training in delegation proving a huge success in Rome as Abasama left command of the battle to a corporal whilst personally leading the brave defence of the unthreatened neighbouring province of Aquila. This change in leadership happily leading to Sokoto suffering more casualties in the battle despite greatly outnumbering and outgunning their Italian opponent.
Both the navy and government are delighted with the newly developed clipper designs following Sokoto's most recent technological advance. Instead of continuing with the usual Sokot ship design of tying a few logs together so as to make an improvised raft, the new design features a few logs being tied together so as to make an improvised raft with the addition of a flimsy sail to said raft. The government and navy both happy that the innovative addition of a sail will provide them with a load of ship.
The academics next research 'Steamers' following a request from the navy. The navy quite sure that the next step in improving upon Sokoto's already stupendous ship design is the addition of a large coal-fired boiler to a highly flammable raft barely able to cope with the weight.
A few weeks later and the government is tempted to return to Sokoto's capital from their South American hideaway, the effects of the curse seemingly having passed as Sokoto secures another thumping victory in Ancona.
Sokoto securing this great victory thanks due to Abasama's brilliant decision to once again courageously direct matters from afar, an army cook left in command of the battle this time. Sokoto's cook led forces winning this astoundingly impressive victory, somehow suffering as they did nearly double the casualties of the hugely outnumbered, poorly trained and demoralised Italian reservist force.
With the bulk of Italy's armed forces now vanquished Sokoto's troops begin the hugely dreaded task of besieging Italy. Many soldiers having to suffer nightmarish siege conditions such as having to prepare their own meals, a number of Sokoto's army cooks having been promoted to the rank of general following recent battles.
Whilst Sokoto's armed forces suffer the horror of poorly made food the government is given a shocking report. Following a long study Sokoto's academics have confirmed that Venezuela, as their name suggests, is the birthplace of one of the most detestable objects in the world; the vuvuzela. This 'musical' instrument having disrupted many of Sokoto's battles with the annoying noise it makes, many spectators of battles bringing a vuvuzela with them so as to cheer on their side, the government quickly come to a conclusion. The diplomats are sent forth.
They return several weeks later rather shaken. Having delivered the deceleration of war to their Venezuelan hosts and explained the reason for Sokoto's sudden attack upon Venezuela, they were left with little choice but to hurriedly flee the country. Venezuela's diplomats quite outraged that anyone could think their nation to blame for the creation of so awful an instrument.
Over a month later and the government quickly begin to regret declaring war upon Venezuela. Not only does it seem as if Sokoto's academics were mistaken in identifying Venezuela as the birthplace of the accursed vuvuzela, Venezuela is also proving a most difficult foe.
Making intelligent attacks as she is with demoralised reserves, who are without the support of cannon, into Sokoto's easily defended position amongst the hilly terrain of El Jobal. With the Venezuelan army able to mount such effective attacks it seems likely that Sokoto will soon lose this war.
The government is given a report a few months later detailing the divisive effect of allowing minority schooling in Misri areas.
In a bid to combat such a divisive effect the government quickly enforce Sokot schooling in the area. No longer will Misri children wallow in ignorance learning useless subjects such as maths, science, reading, writing and so forth. Instead they will be enlightened with a Sokot curriculum which covers far more important subjects such as Poetry, The History of the Wonderful Conservative Party, Poetry, The Need to Always Vote Conservative, Poetry and Font Sizes of the World.
A month later and peace is agreed with the Netherlands.
The government, and doubtless the people of Asia as well, are unsurprisingly delighted following this peace deal as at last Asia has been graced with Sokot font.
As Britain is currently struggling with internal rebellion following her recent war with Sokoto, British citizens surprisingly angry that their nation once again lost to so pink and incompetence obsessed a country, the government attempt to win over another of Britain's allies to Sokoto's side. This policy of winning over Britain's allies having already enjoyed great success, the Netherlands and Venezuela both now staunch allies of Sokoto, the diplomats are sent forth.
With Sokoto's diplomats having become quite tired of the inexplicably hostile reception they are forced to endure whenever engaging in diplomatic missions they have turned to Kumbari Rumfa for aid. Requesting as they have that he write a poem in honour of their Portuguese hosts so as to leave said hosts so impressed by his epic poetry that they do not feel overly annoyed upon being presented with a deceleration of war.
Quite surprisingly his wonderful poem does not have the desired effect;
O nation of Portugal,
Your name rhymes with nothing thus it is about time you are annexed, as making a good poem which includes your bothersome name is too difficult even for a poet as great as I...-ugal.
Sokoto's diplomats chased from Portugal after delivering the deceleration of war, their angry Portuguese counterparts clearly unable to appreciate such a poetic masterpiece.
Three months later and the government is given welcome news from Bangui.
This newly established colony providing Sokoto with an excellent base from which to viciously attack neighbouring Prussian colonies, uh, from which to greatly improve Sokoto's relationship with Prussia, that is. Colonisation of South Angola instantly begins next, Sokoto's nobles keen to acquire yet more peasant hunting ground.
Research of 'Steamers' comes to an end over a month later.
As expected this technology has led to a great improvement in Sokot ship design. Sokot ships now wallowing and sinking as never before as they are barely able to cope with the weight of the newly added boilers, which are happily prone to exploding entirely at random.
Whilst happy with this new design the navy believe that yet further improvement can be made to Sokoto's vessels, thus they request the research of 'Iron Steamers'. The academics begin researching the technology instantly, the navy's suggestion of attaching some heavy iron panels to the sides of Sokoto's already near submerged ships, so as to provide further protection, clearly a good idea.
Two days later and peace is agreed with Venezuela.
The government is left incandescent with rage following this particularly poor showing from the cartographers, Sokoto's font in South America not having been extended despite the acquisition of a large province from Venezuela. The Prime Minister summing up the government's annoyance in stating that when presented with so inviting and tantalising an opening, as acquistion of this province provided, the natural reaction should always be one of excited enlargement.
Less than a month later and the government is moved from fury to near admiration for the cartographers following peace with Portugal.
The government forced to concede that it takes a truly impressive level of incompetence to keep the font so small, and so poorly positioned, when afforded quite so much space.
Alongside gaining some embarrassing font in Iberia this peace deal has also secured Sokoto further land in Asia.
Acquiring Goa clearly a wise move, the government foresee no difficulties in ruling a piece of land which is surrounded on all sides by Sokoto's great friend Britain, and which lies hundreds of miles away oversea from mainland Sokoto.
The government is left pleased by a report from Rio Grande do Sul a couple of weeks later.
The citizens of the province having learned that the Conservative party resolved a political deadlock in the local assemblies by bribing, intimidating and imprisoning any politician who dared disagree with them, they are understandably moved to celebrate the considerable political freedom they enjoy.
Truly Sokoto is land of the free.
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wow just got around to reading this morningsider and i have to say you really soked it to them .
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