• Crusader Kings III Available Now!

    The realm rejoices as Paradox Interactive announces the launch of Crusader Kings III, the latest entry in the publisher’s grand strategy role-playing game franchise. Advisors may now jockey for positions of influence and adversaries should save their schemes for another day, because on this day Crusader Kings III can be purchased on Steam, the Paradox Store, and other major online retailers.


    Real Strategy Requires Cunning

MatPainter

Recruit
81 Badges
Oct 16, 2011
8
0
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • Magicka
  • March of the Eagles
  • Europa Universalis IV: Res Publica
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Semper Fi
  • The Showdown Effect
  • Victoria 2
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2: Heart of Darkness
  • Rome Gold
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • Stellaris: Galaxy Edition
  • Cities: Skylines Deluxe Edition
  • Cities: Skylines - After Dark
  • Knights of Pen and Paper 2
  • Crusader Kings II: Reapers Due
  • Cities: Skylines - Snowfall
  • Europa Universalis IV: Mare Nostrum
  • Stellaris: Synthetic Dawn
  • Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Crusader Kings II: Charlemagne
  • Crusader Kings II: Legacy of Rome
  • Crusader Kings II: The Old Gods
  • Crusader Kings II: Rajas of India
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Sunset Invasion
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
  • Dungeonland
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Leviathan: Warships
  • Impire
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • For the Motherland
  • Europa Universalis IV: Call to arms event
  • Europa Universalis IV: Wealth of Nations
  • Europa Universalis IV: Conquest of Paradise
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Teleglitch: Die More Edition
  • Europa Universalis IV: El Dorado
  • Magicka: Wizard Wars Founder Wizard
  • Crusader Kings II: Way of Life
  • Pillars of Eternity
  • Europa Universalis IV: Common Sense
  • Crusader Kings II: Horse Lords
  • Stellaris: Lithoids
  • Crusader Kings II: Conclave
Man, this AAR is AMAZING! I've read it all in two days, and I can't wait to see how the Brits will fare against the far superior dressed Sokoto troops.

Also, I couldn't help but notice that you've conquered my Rio Grande do Sul. I couldn't be happier! I'm requesting my pink uniform right now!
 
May 2, 2012
2
0
The best AAR I've read

The UvsUK War will be the most important war in this AAR to decide U or UK, who will conquer the world?
I will keep an eye on your battle.

Thank for wonderful AAR
Hope to see u soon^^
 

morningSIDEr

General
15 Badges
Mar 31, 2008
2.362
0
  • Hearts of Iron II: Armageddon
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Deus Vult
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Divine Wind
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis: Rome
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • 500k Club
Thank you profusely for the replies!

Selzro - Many thanks once again for the kind words (another bribe is en route!). I was rather shocked by how dreadfully the AI performed when controlling Britain's navy. I noticed countless British ships sailing everywhere except from the Irish Sea! Admittedly though even if they had blocked Sokoto's access from Ireland to the British mainland via stationing ships in the Irish Sea, Sokoto's mighty navy would have soon defeated them!

As for the six ships they did attack with they were indeed ironclads. It seems likely that Britain and Russia will become great allies of Sokoto alike Chile and Argentina, every nations understandably wishing to become friends with the great pink blob. And, as ever, Sokot poetry remains more than epic enough to describe this struggle!

Vaya con Queso - Thanks for the kind words (another bribe is in the post!). You have it in a nutshell! The warscore from victorious battles, occupying all of Britain and Ireland, alongside also taking Britain's African holdings, should be enough to allow Sokoto to liberate all of Britain's African possessions. Hopefully anyway!

Anjwalker - Thank you for the kind words (another bribe is on the way!). You are quite right, I had to strike at Britain before she became too powerful. She is strong enough a foe as it is now!

loki100 - You are quite right, it is likely well known by now how beneficial it is to become an ally of Sokoto! I have to agree regarding the need to recruit Seymour, the man is clearly a ridiculously talented commander.

Ogrecrusher - A great many thanks for the kind words (your bribe is on the way!).

Marshall Daub - Sadly they are but one of many who have copied Sokoto's great writers and poets. It clear that everyone from William Shakespeare to J.K. Rowling has stolen from Sokoto's many talented writers.

MrHouse - It would be interesting but I think it sadly unlikely, Sokoto too democratic a nation as this update will show!

Selzro - How right you are regarding it being a nightmare having to manually control Sokot industry. Although I daresay the Conservative party would bring their usual brilliance to the task if so required!

Juan_de_Marco - Exactly so! Sokoto's democracy is just like her schoolclasses; riven with anarchy, incompetence and unfairness. Uh, Sokoto's democracy is just like her schoolclasses; rife with brilliance on show, astounding competence and manifest fairness, that is!

Fyregecko - Thank you once again for the kind words (another bribe is on the way!). Suddenly the reason why I am attacked everytime I venture into Glasgow becomes clear...

aldriq - I was hugely relieved but also rather disappointed by how poor the AI was in controlling Britain's navy. As I said to Selzro, they seemed to have ships everywhere but for where they were most needed, in the Irish Sea! The British navy did improve upon their performance as the war dragged on though, likely inspired by Venezuela's lead, as this update will show.

As for the Pink & Green Rusty Nails (1 part Scotch, 1 part Sokotch, 1 part Drambuie) you've missed one key ingredient; 2 parts paintstripper!

MatPainter - Thank you profusely for the kind words (your bribe, and pink uniform, is in the post!).

enphuongnam - A great many thanks for the kind words (a bribe is on the way!). You are quite right in that this current war against the UK is hugely important, but not with regards to the contest against Britain, but instead because it gives Sokoto a chance to defeat the mighty Venezuela who I have long since learned pose far more of a threat than Britain ever could!
 

morningSIDEr

General
15 Badges
Mar 31, 2008
2.362
0
  • Hearts of Iron II: Armageddon
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Deus Vult
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Divine Wind
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis: Rome
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • 500k Club
[The following chapter title has been redacted by order of the Conservative party.]

Chapter Twenty Nine

As Sokoto's forces continue to besiege Scotland and Ireland, many of said forces having lodged requests begging for new uniforms of a different colour so as to end the kisses and insults they continue to suffer from natives of both lands, the government is left worried upon learning that the British navy seems to have finally overcome their understandable fear of Sokoto's mighty navy. Several British ships attacking a small Sokot squadron sailing along the coast of North Africa.


Thankfully the navy deliver another impressive performance which will doubtless scare the British navy from the seas once again.

[This battle shows exactly why I ignore the naval side of things in Paradox games. I am forever forgetting about naval forces I leave in open water only for them to end up easily defeated by an enemy, as was the case here.]

Whilst unsurprisingly delighted with the navy's conduct in this battle the government remains rather less than pleased with the army, as another dismal showing is made by them during victories achieved against Britain in England and South Africa respectively.


The government rightly feeling that as the army has suffered so few casualties in these battles that truly these 'victories' are more akin to defeat.

A few days later and the government's displeasure regarding the army's recent poor performance is slightly lessened as peace is ageed with both Oranje and Zulu.


The government always enjoying the annexation of once independent nations into the tyrannical Sokot Empire. Uh, the government always enjoying the liberation of once cruelly oppressed and struggling nations into the enlightened Sokot Empire, that is.

Having thus saved two more nations from the horror of deciding their own destiny via independent rule the government is given the welcome news that some more progress has been made in the attempt to liberate some of Britain's lands, the first provinces in Scotland falling to Sokoto.


As Glaswegian residents quickly get over the gloom of their city having been captured by revelling in the news that their effiminate east coast Edinburgh neighbours succumbed to Sokot sieges more quickly than they did, the army is left horrified by the state of the troops detailed to besieging both cities. Having spent just over three months in Scotland both forces are filled with waddling, rotund soldiers displaying a distinctly unhealthy pallor, Scotland's exceedingly healthy diet having quickly taken its toll upon all Sokot soldiers stationed there.

Whilst Sokoto's troops continue to suffer dreadfully in Scotland, their waistlines expanding nearly as quickly as they gain black eyes from repeated kisses delivered by locals, the government is given some hugely troubling news from Sokot Spain.


The army delivering another woeful performance in the battle of Caceres, having decimated Portugal's army whilst suffering minimal losses. Thankfully as the officer in charge of the battle, Baba Kabe, is the nephew of the great Kumbari Kabe, the government is able to hide this shocking result from the public as Kumbari quickly writes a poem in honour of the battle in a desperate bid to protect his nephew's reputation.

Of the battle of Caceres listening to Portugal's lies I would not recommend,
It is Sokoto and not Portugal for whom far more soldiers met their end,
The brilliant Baba Kabe we must thus commend,
Of the frightful Portuguese forces he had to contend,
His forces to victory he nonetheless did send,
To a most brilliant victory of which I have now penned,
Glorious the number of Sokot men with wounds which now must mend,
And so too the countless numbers which now ascend,
This my view as someone wholly neutral and impartial upon which you can depend,
Truly Kabe is a most brilliant leader as I am sure all now comprehend.

With Sokoto's delighted public now convinced that Baba Kabe is a modern day Alexander the Great following publication of this poem, the government is given yet more welcome news as the academics report that research into 'Iron Breech-loaded Artillery' has come to an end.


Although the academics had originally been ordered to complete research of a 'Deep Defense System' next, this was changed mere days later after Sokoto's close ally, Argentina, offered to aid Sokoto in the research and production of a new and improved type of cannon. The resultant breech-loading model, for which Argentina carried out the bulk of the research and production, is proving a highly lethal new addition to Sokoto's arsenal. Lethal to those operating the cannon that is, the new model having even more of tendency to explode randomly than its predecessor. This quite surprising, it almost as if Argentina's insistence upon creating the new artillery from mud, spittle and leaves was a cunning ploy to cause Sokoto casualties.

The academics next begin research of a 'Deep Defense System' once again following repeated demands from Sokoto's brave officers for such a defence system. The current war with Britain having proven to the officers the great need for a defence system which allows for them to cower, uhm, courageously defend forts lying many miles from the battlefield, deep within friendly territory, whilst valiantly directing matters from afar.

[As stated in chapter twenty seven I did originally begin researching the 'Deep Defense System' technology but I changed research to 'Iron Breech-loaded Artillery' after a few days. I simply forgot to correct my notes, hence my confusion when writing the updates!]

A few days later and the government is informed of an enemy landing upon Sokot shores. Finally the dreaded time has come, it seems that at long last Britain has made use of her large navy to begin amphibious landings. Considering the size of the British navy and the boundless opportunities open to said navy with regards to Sokoto's long, mainly undefended coastline, she could well wreak havoc upon Sokoto by landing troops wherever she pleases. The fearful government reluctantly ask where Britain has made her landing.


Oh. It is not Britain but instead the noted naval power of Venezuela which has made a landing in Sokot Greece with a whole nine thousand men. A whole nine thousand reservists who are still not yet at full morale. A whole nine thousand reservists who are still not yet at full morale and who have been dropped off next to similarly sized Sokot force which is more than ready for a fight. Clearly it is only Britain's allies, such as Venezuela, which can match her brilliance in the field of strategy.

Whilst the desperately panicking government begins pleading with Britain for peace, desperate as they are to stop the Venezuelan juggernaut, they are given yet more devastating news a few weeks later.


Thankfully the brilliant Kumbari Kabe does leave to a grieving nation one last poem which is widely considered his best work. It simply strange that said poem had been held by a close friend of his, only to be published in the event of any suspicious circumstances surrounding his passing.

[A portion of the following document has been redacted by order of the Conservative Party.]

If you are reading this I am now dead,
My life has come to the end of its thread.
Should my passing seem at all mysterious,
Read on to learn of facts which are most serious.
I have dirt on all of the government including the Prime Minister,
Most of this information really quite sinister.
Of the Prime Minister I need recount,
That countless times he has stolen money from the treasury for his offshore bank account only done what is best for the nation.
The following may well sicken,
As I am afraid to say that the finance minister enjoys bedroom activites involving large bowls of cream, several slabs of butter and a rubber chicken I have run out of superlatives with which to describe the finance minister.
For the cabinet I can detail far more,
So much in fact that it would likely bore.
Suffice to say never again vote Conservative as they are a corrupt and wicked organisation,
They deserve nothing but obliteration By which I mean always vote for the wonderful Conservative party as they are the most democratic and fair of all political organisations.

As the nation is thus scared by an attack from the mighty Venezuela and left distraught following the passing of the much loved Kumbari Kabe, the government is given yet more worrying news a mere month later.


Doubtless knowing that Sokoto is busy desperately mobilising all of her forces to deal with the great threat posed by Venezuela, Britain has finally made an amphibious landing. In a stupendous move which leaves Sokoto's army marvelling once again at the intelligence of British strategy she has landed a considerable force in northwestern Sokot Spain. Indeed, so large is the force that it is currently suffering from attrition as the mountainous territory of La Coruna is unable to support so many men.

A few months later, and with the British force in La Coruna having suffered further from attrition, the full brilliance of Britain's attack upon Sokot Spain is finally made clear.


In deciding against an attack upon one of the many barely defended coastal provinces in the Sokot Empire, and having also decided against attempting to rescue mainland Britain from Sokoto's besieging forces, Britain instead wisely landed her men in a position where over one hundred thousand Sokot troops are currently stationed, said troops having emerged victorious from crushing the army of Britain's ally, Portugal, mere months before. That this British force has little by way of artillery, and no naval support whatsoever, makes it abundantly clear that this cunning attack was meticulously planned. The Sokot army is simply hugely relieved that Britain has made one slight blunder in assigning the lacklustre General Havelock to the command of this attack rather than the brilliant Seymour.

Whilst Britain unsurprisingly struggles under the inept leadership of Havelock at La Coruna the government is given some reasonably good news.


As hoped Somaliland is home to a number of fancy dress shops, these the breeding grounds for the extremely rare 'panther' armed with artillery, said panther looking surprisingly like men dressed in suits. Normally discovery of such rare creatures would lead to Somaliland becoming a popular destination for safari trips, but alas there is a slight problem which is preventing such trips.

With Somaliland now colonised the government is given the welcome news that France has been spotted colonising yet more of Africa, a French colony in East Central Sahara having been identified. Upon learning this the government quickly give the order for Niger to be colonised so as to give Sokoto a point from which to invade this French colony at a later date. Uh, upon learning this the government quickly give the order for Niger to be colonised so as to protect this isolated French colony from potential warmongering nations such as Venezuela, that is. Doubtless France is delighted to gain such protection from her great friend Sokoto.

As colonisation of Niger begins the government is given a worrying report from the army.


A small British fleet has been spotted off the coast of northwestern Spain, it likely that Britain is sending men to reinforce her struggling army in La Coruna.

The Sokot army need applaud this clever move from Britain, Sokoto's troops currently battling in La Coruna will need to be careful as these reinforcing men could well tip the balance in Britain's favour.


Ah. Instead of reinforcing her beleaguered army in La Coruna Britain has instead wisely opted to begin a new battle in neighbouring Vigo with a small demoralised force which is without cavalry or artillery. The small force does at least enjoy the brilliant leadership of General Fairfax who is skilled in the art of being unfit for command.

Britain's cunning attack upon Vigo is somehow defeated over a week later.


This victory bringing with it the end of the cautious politician Usman Kabe's political career, voters never willing to support a man who suffers so few casualties.

Just over a week later Sokoto emerges victorious at La Coruna.


It hugely surprising that Britain's stupendous strategy of landing a few thousand men mere miles from over one hundred thousand Sokot veterans, then leaving said men entirely stranded without naval support or reinforcements, has proven a bad idea.

Turning from matters of war to domestic concerns the government is given some worrisome news.


Naturally for a government which supports equality and democratic freedom the Conservative party deal with this delicate issue fairly by instantly dismissing the notion of giving women any political power whatsoever. The party coming to the understandable conclusion that it is quite bad enough that the common riff-raff now have the vote without women too becoming enfranchised. That is until the grandmothers of several cabinet ministers receive letters from the suffragettes whereupon the government hastily give their support to this issue. Embarrassing backtracking far preferrable to suffering the ire of angry grandmothers.

A day later and the government hurriedly pass further political reform.


In doing so the government show how committed they are to furthering democractic freedom within Sokoto. It does not show that the government quickly passed this reform out of a desperate desire to appease the still suspicious grandmothers of several cabinet ministers who remain irked at the government's previous position with regards to female voting rights.

As Sokoto has become an ever more democratic nation following the passing of countless political reforms, this clearly shown by the fact that the Conservative party rightly continue to dominate Sokot politics, understandably never polling less than ninety nine percent of votes, there is little surprise when the government announce that the constitution has been extended, Sokoto now a constitutional monarchy.


The government able to gain these concessions from the Sultan as he has long since abandoned Sokoto, for some reason favouring life abroad as opposed to living in so pink and incompetence obsessed a nation.
 

unmerged(351041)

First Lieutenant
5 Badges
Jul 22, 2011
247
0
  • Darkest Hour
  • Europa Universalis III: Chronicles
  • Hearts of Iron III Collection
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Rome: Vae Victis
I think Sokoto's progress in its various wars speaks for itself, so for now I'll just say that you have a lot of Anarcho-liberal rebels. For the sake of the AAR, I hope they never decide to get up and do something.
 

loki100

Field Marshal
22 Badges
Jul 1, 2008
7.559
5
  • Rome Gold
  • Mount & Blade: Warband
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Sword of the Stars
  • Semper Fi
  • Hearts of Iron II: Armageddon
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • For the Motherland
  • Divine Wind
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Deus Vult
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Victoria 2
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • 500k Club
  • Crusader Kings II: Holy Knight (pre-order)
  • Pride of Nations
  • Rise of Prussia
Kabe's second poem puts me in mind of the old Roman tradition of attaching rude letters and prose poems about the great and good (in former times usually a pope) to the statue of Pasquale where they could be read by all and sundry.

The AI's military strategy is quite awe inspiring though

and yes, keeping your granny quiet is always a good strategy (both political and domestic)
 

Anjwalker

Major
36 Badges
Mar 4, 2012
553
30
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Victoria 2
  • The Showdown Effect
  • Magicka
  • Leviathan: Warships
  • Hearts of Iron III Collection
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Crusader Kings II: The Old Gods
  • Cities in Motion
  • Dungeonland
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Prison Architect
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife Pre-Order
  • Stellaris: Apocalypse
  • Stellaris: Synthetic Dawn
  • Cities: Skylines - Mass Transit
  • Stellaris - Path to Destruction bundle
  • Cities: Skylines - Natural Disasters
  • Stellaris: Leviathans Story Pack
  • Stellaris: Digital Anniversary Edition
  • Stellaris
  • Magicka 2
  • Magicka: Wizard Wars Founder Wizard
  • 500k Club
  • War of the Roses
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • Crusader Kings II: Legacy of Rome
  • Teleglitch: Die More Edition
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Sunset Invasion
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
Awesome as always. Soundly squashing Oranje and Zulu, all while fighting Britain and her allies.

I have to say, you have the same strategy of naval warfare as me; I always do that - I forget my ships and then they are killed by superior enemy fleets.
 
May 2, 2012
2
0
I notice that some female in sokoto need more freedom, and more pink dress (which is only for man).
It's not fair in a democratic society, right?
So i recommend u to enact woman's pink dress allowed law right now to prevent a rebellion of the pink womans before it's too late ^^
 

InnocentIII

Ask how many Divisions I have!
107 Badges
Apr 22, 2001
4.189
91
Visit site
  • Supreme Ruler 2020
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
  • Magicka
  • Majesty 2
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis IV: Res Publica
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis: Rome
  • Rome Gold
  • Semper Fi
  • Sengoku
  • Hearts of Iron III Collection
  • Supreme Ruler: Cold War
  • Victoria 2
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2: Heart of Darkness
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • 500k Club
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Crusader Kings II: Holy Knight (pre-order)
  • Europa Universalis III: Collection
  • Europa Universalis IV: El Dorado
  • Europa Universalis IV: Pre-order
  • Crusader Kings III
  • Diplomacy
  • A Game of Dwarves
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Crusader Kings II: Charlemagne
  • Crusader Kings II: Legacy of Rome
  • Crusader Kings II: The Old Gods
  • Crusader Kings II: Rajas of India
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Sunset Invasion
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
  • Commander: Conquest of the Americas
  • Deus Vult
  • East India Company
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Divine Wind
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Europa Universalis IV: Conquest of Paradise
  • Europa Universalis IV: Wealth of Nations
  • For The Glory
  • For the Motherland
  • Hearts of Iron III
Fun stuff! Hope to see maps of your new possessions when this is over. History is all about font size.
 

sprites

Field Marshal
64 Badges
May 1, 2008
6.545
59
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • For the Motherland
  • Hearts of Iron III: Their Finest Hour
  • Darkest Hour
  • For The Glory
  • March of the Eagles
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • Victoria 2
  • 200k Club
  • Europa Universalis IV: El Dorado
  • Europa Universalis IV: Golden Century
  • Magicka 2
  • Europa Universalis IV: Common Sense
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife Pre-Order
  • Europa Universalis IV: Mare Nostrum
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Cadet
  • Europa Universalis IV: Rights of Man
  • Cities: Skylines - Natural Disasters
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Together for Victory
  • Cities: Skylines - Mass Transit
  • Europa Universalis IV: Mandate of Heaven
  • Shadowrun Returns
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Death or Dishonor
  • Cities: Skylines - Green Cities
  • Europa Universalis IV: Dharma
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Expansion Pass
  • Europa Universalis IV: Rule Britannia
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Expansion Pass
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife
  • Magicka
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Cities: Skylines - Campus
  • Semper Fi
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2: Heart of Darkness
  • 500k Club
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Cities: Skylines - After Dark
  • Cities: Skylines - Snowfall
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Arsenal of Democracy
  • Cities in Motion 2
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Divine Wind
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Europa Universalis IV: Call to arms event
Hmm ... the british seem to be using a rather sokoto-ish strategy!
 

Selzro

Lt. General
41 Badges
Apr 23, 2009
1.519
36
  • Hearts of Iron Anthology
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Sengoku
  • Rome Gold
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • Europa Universalis IV: Conquest of Paradise
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
  • Crusader Kings II: Sunset Invasion
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Cadet
  • Europa Universalis IV: Pre-order
  • Crusader Kings II: Way of Life
  • Europa Universalis IV: Common Sense
  • Hearts of Iron IV: La Resistance
  • Stellaris
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Expansion Pass
  • Imperator: Rome
  • Stellaris: Distant Stars
  • Stellaris: Leviathans Story Pack
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Together for Victory
  • Imperator: Rome - Magna Graecia
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Death or Dishonor
  • Age of Wonders III
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Expansion Pass
  • 500k Club
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Victoria 2
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • Crusader Kings II: Legacy of Rome
  • Crusader Kings II: The Old Gods
  • Crusader Kings II: Rajas of India
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Victoria 2: Heart of Darkness
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Stellaris - Path to Destruction bundle
  • Europa Universalis IV: Res Publica
  • Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
  • Europa Universalis IV: Wealth of Nations
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Charlemagne
The British are so far ahead in casualties, it must be a constant shame on the entire Sokot officer corps! At least the Conservatives can continue their perpetual rule in greater democracy than ever.
 

morningSIDEr

General
15 Badges
Mar 31, 2008
2.362
0
  • Hearts of Iron II: Armageddon
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Deus Vult
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Divine Wind
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis: Rome
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • 500k Club
Thank you profusely for the replies!

Vaya con Queso - I'm becoming ever more terrified of the A-L rebels with each passing day. Their numbers have been increasingly quickly as this update will sadly show. Quite why this is the case I truly do not know, it puzzling that anyone would wish to rebel whilst living in the paradise which is the Sokot Empire!

The Arch Mede - How right you are! The devious Brits are doubtless jealous of Sokoto's great poetry and hope to inspire one of their own poets with such cunning tactics.

loki100 - Sokoto does have a tradition similar to that employed by Romans as you say, but instead of rude letters and poetry said writings contain nothing but praise for Sokoto's brilliant politicians! Sadly the British AI has begun employing a startling new strategy, as will be seen in this update, said strategy a relatively intelligent and competent one.

Anjwalker - Many thanks for the kind words (your bribe is en route!). Aye, sadly the naval side of things in every Paradox game has completely passed me by. I'm barely able to control my armies and government without having to deal with naval matters as well!

enphuongnam - I agree with you in that women are understandably piqued at having little opportunity to wear pink within Sokoto, this most masculine of colours understandably reserved for men. Unfortunately though the women of Sokoto will have to do without pink for now. This because pink dye supplies having fallen to worryingly low levels due to the underhanded actions of Britain as this update will show!

InnocentIII - Thank you for the kind words (a bribe is on the way!). How right you are regarding font size, and thankfully Sokoto's is ever growing, as this update will show.

sprites - It is a that Britain has been using Sokoto's brilliantly incompetent strategies! Thankfully though Britain has returned to adopting a more normal and competent strategy, as this update will show, it thus little surprise she met defeat as a result!

Selzro - Indeed Sokoto's officer corps is greatly shamed! Alas attempts to reform the army have ended prematurely as this update will show. At least Sokoto is able to enjoy the great benefits of the wonderful rule provided by the Conservative party though, as you say.
 

morningSIDEr

General
15 Badges
Mar 31, 2008
2.362
0
  • Hearts of Iron II: Armageddon
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Deus Vult
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Divine Wind
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis: Rome
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Victoria 2
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • 500k Club
Chapter Thirty - Live and Let Dye

It quickly becomes abundantly clear why Sokoto has become a constitutional monarchy mere weeks after the change.


Sokoto nothing if not a wonderfully fair and democractic nation. The Conservative party do however share the public's concern that this election was marred by foul play, the Radicals clearly resorting to underhanded tactics so as to cheat their way to over five percent of the vote.

Whilst an investigation into the Radical party's obvious cheating begins, the government is given some pleasing news.


There are now over two million citizens of Sokoto's primary Hausa culture residing within the Empire, this allowing for another national focus. This rise in population attributed to a worrying decline in army casualties, great advances having been made in the field of medicine such as the widespread introduction of cutting edge, literally, treatment including amputation and the use of leeches, and a continued increase in births as a result of the Sokoto's ever effective romantic poetry.

Upon learning of the newly acquired national focus the government instantly order the colonisation of Niamey. Whilst there are undoubtedly many risks in attempting colonisation with drought, famine, attacks from natives and so forth all potential dangers for colonists, these are risks the government is bravely willing to face. By courageously relaxing in the comfort of Sokoto's capital whilst sending poor citizens to begin founding the colony. It truly breathtaking the sacrifices the government is willing to take for the good of the nation.

With Sokoto currently struggling in her war with Britain, Britain's strategic brilliance in forever throwing forward poorly supported, outnumbered troops at easily defended Sokot positions unsurprisingly proving difficult for Sokoto to deal with, it would not be wise for Sokoto to anger any other nation at present.

The diplomats are sent forth.


They return mere hours later having desperately fled Spain fearing for their lives after having delivered the decleration of war to their Spanish counterparts. The diplomats having learned that it is never a good idea to interrupt the siesta of a Spanish diplomat when attempting to deliver a decleration of war.

The bulk of Spain's army is crushed a few weeks later at Madrid.


This following General Mina's assuming command of the defence of Madrid when he is entirely without any defensive ability whatsoever. It is not for no reason that Mina is considered a genius by the Spanish army.

A few days later and the government is left pleased by reports that the Spanish public are rising in celebration at the news that Sokoto has once again defeated the army of their tyrannical government in a bid to liberate yet more of their nation into Sokoto's welcoming embrace.


Oh. The Spanish public have not risen in celebration at this news, they have instead inexplicably risen in revolt. Said revolt extending as far as the Philippines, land which Sokoto rescued from Spanish rule just over six years ago.


Spanish citizens in the Philippines having risen in support of their compatriots in mainland Spain in the hope that they too will not have to suffer Sokot rule. As, for some reason, Spanish residents within the Sokot Empire are none too keen on the high taxes, lack of democracy and forced wearing of pink which comes with life within the Sokot Empire.

Whilst Sokoto's forces busy themselves with crusing this rebellion the government is given some pleasing news from Britain.


At long last all of mainland Britain is now occupied by Sokoto. Sokoto's troops have suffered greatly during these long months spent besieging Britain, many carrying dreadful injuries as a result of said siege duty. This especially true of the troops assigned to besieging London due to their repeatedly accepting kind offers from locals offering them a dry lunch.

With the government having become unsurprisingly sick and tired of repeated failures on the armies part, the woeful performance of the army during the current wars against Britain and Spain particularly unacceptable, they have demanded change.


Thankfully the army have identified just the man to bring such change, the gifted Kanajeji al-Walid rightly thought of as a rising star within the Sokot military.

A few months later, and with al-Walid busy reforming the army, the government is left hugely relieved when informed that the majority of Britain's allies are desrting her.


With superpowers such as Siam, Gwalior, Panjab and, most importantly, the Venezuelan behemoth no longer arrayed against Sokoto, at long last she has a chance of emerging victorious from this war.

[As can be seen Venezuela proved rather more difficult a foe than I originally imagined she would. With her quickly reinforcing her small force in Greece I did not have the men to repulse this landing, thus she was free to begin occupying my Greek holdings.]

The government's relief is shortlived however as worrying reports arrive from Madasgascar a few months later.


Much to the government's surprise Britain has abandoned her stupendous strategy of landing small, hugely outnumbered and barely supported forces in Sokot Spain. Instead she has inexplicably made an amphibious attack upon the entirely undefended Madagascar, this large island completely isolated from the Sokot mainland thus making it impossible for Sokoto to attempt to defend the island.

Command of this delicate operation, the success of which has become all more important for Britain following the mighty Venezuela's exit from the war, has wisely been given to the gifted General Lester Beatty who led over one hundred thousand British soldiers to defeat in Belfast nearly two years before. In a clever move he has ordered his troops in Madgascar to march inland to the mountainous region of Tananarive where they are now suffering from attrition, the inhospitable region unable to support such numbers. With such brilliant leadership it seems likely that Britain may well triumph in this war.

Whilst one of Britain's finest leaders is thus experiencing success in Madagascar there is sad news for the government as they learn that Sokoto's most able commander has passed away.


The nation is moved to mourning al-Walid's passing. In his short time spent reforming Sokoto's army he had already met with great success, his decision to equip all soldiers with white flags so as to allow for easy surrender a particularly inspired move which has decimated morale. Uh, which has improved morale considerably, that is.

Thankfully the nation's despondency at having lost so skilled a general is lifted just under a month later as peace is agreed with another of Britain's allies.


With this peace deal Portugal has been removed from Africa and, far more importantly, Sokoto's font size has increased considerably. In a rare showing of competency Sokoto's cartographers made the intelligent decision to spread some of Sokoto's font over empty portions of the map. Whilst such practice is perhaps slightly underhanded the delighted Prime Minister could not care less. Having become rather excited after viewing Sokoto's font increase in size once again, he is led away to a cold bath in a bid to calm him down.

Alongside gaining territory from Portugal in Africa Sokoto has also strengthened her hold upon Asia, the peace deal giving her a border with China.


Gaining such a border clearly a wise move, China one of many nations with which Sokoto enjoys excellent relations, the government foresee no difficulty in ruling a small piece of land which lies thousands of miles from mainland Sokoto, next to the nation with the largest standing army in the world.


Yes, it is highly unlikely that Sokoto will experience any difficulties with China whatsoever. Very unlikely indeed. So unlikely that the government hurriedly begin showering the Chinese government with bribes whilst sending out a team of Sokoto's highly skilled dipomats in a desperate bid to remedy the situation.

As Sokoto's diplomats attempt to appease China's government, Sokoto's government is able to relax in the knowledge that at least the war is going well.


Admittedly Britain has occupied part of Madagascar and Sokoto's citizens are becoming rather irked as the British blockade brings pink dye supplies to precariously low levels, but as Sokoto has no rebel problems to worry about the government is not concerned in the least.

The research of a 'Deep Defense System' comes to an end a couple of months later.


With this defense system now developed, this allowing for Sokoto's brave officers to station themselves miles behind the battlefront, deep within friendly territory, the officers have realised that they made a slight mistake in demanding such a defence system. This mistake being that the defences are Sokot made. They have quickly learned that stationing themselves in Sokot constructed forts miles from the enemy is often far more dangerous than fighting on the frontlines. Sokot forts still proving deathtraps due to the clever use of highly flammable and explosive materials in their construction.

The academics next begin researching 'Steel Breech-loaded Artillery' following another kind offer from Argentina to assist in said research. The Sokot army understandably excited by the claims from Argentina's academics who promise that their new cannon design, which is predominantly made from glass, will prove far more powerful and effective than the last model.

Months later and with Britain's blockade continuing to increase militancy within the Empire, supplies of tigerskin now at critically low levels as a result of the blockade, the government hurriedly enact further political reform.


That nearly four million people now support an Anarcho-Liberal rebellion has in no way influenced the government's decision to now pass this political reform. Instead the government passed this reform due to their desire to desperately cling to power for as long as possible. Uh, instead the government passed this reform due to their desire to ever further democratic freedom within Sokoto.

Following over three years of war peace is at last agreed with Britain.


This peace deal has significantly lessened Britain's prescence in Africa, Sokoto gaining control of most of South Africa but for a small Prussian colony. These new lands bringing with them another considerable increase in Sokoto's font size which aides have wisely neglected to inform the Prime Minister of, desperate as they are to avoid his becoming 'flustered' once again.

Alongside gaining further land in Africa Sokoto has also gained control of Ulster and the islands of Tristan da Cunha following the peace deal.


It clearly an intelligent decision to demand this land, which is completely isolated from mainland Sokoto, from the foremost naval power in the world after Sokoto's own navy was found to be surprisingly wanting.

With both war exhaustion and militancy at worryingly high levels following the years of war and blockade which the Empire has just suffered, the best course of action for Sokoto now would be to bring her war with Spain to a close as quickly as possible before then avoiding any further conflict for the foreseeable future so as to allow the country to recover.

With this in mind, the diplomats are sent forth.

 
Last edited:

alhoward

First Lieutenant
66 Badges
Feb 3, 2012
287
31
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Rome: Vae Victis
  • Victoria 2: Heart of Darkness
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Semper Fi
  • Rome Gold
  • March of the Eagles
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Hearts of Iron III: Their Finest Hour
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • For the Motherland
  • Darkest Hour
  • Europa Universalis IV: Common Sense
  • Europa Universalis IV: Cradle of Civilization
  • Mount & Blade: Warband
  • Mount & Blade: With Fire and Sword
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Death or Dishonor
  • Crusader Kings II: Monks and Mystics
  • Crusader Kings II: Way of Life
  • Stellaris: Leviathans Story Pack
  • Stellaris: Digital Anniversary Edition
  • Crusader Kings III
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Cadet
  • Europa Universalis IV: Rights of Man
  • Crusader Kings II: Horse Lords
  • Crusader Kings II: Reapers Due
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Field Marshal
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Colonel
  • Europa Universalis IV: Cossacks
  • Crusader Kings II: Conclave
  • Stellaris
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Expansion Pass
  • Stellaris: Ancient Relics
  • Imperator: Rome
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife
  • Imperator: Rome Sign Up
  • Hearts of Iron IV: Expansion Pass
  • Europa Universalis IV: Dharma
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Victoria 2
  • 500k Club
  • Europa Universalis IV: El Dorado
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Divine Wind
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Europa Universalis IV: Res Publica
  • Crusader Kings II: Rajas of India
We must all hope the casualty rates in the mountains of Peru will be acceptably high. I hope that al-Walid is available to lead the offensive.
 

Anjwalker

Major
36 Badges
Mar 4, 2012
553
30
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Victoria 2
  • The Showdown Effect
  • Magicka
  • Leviathan: Warships
  • Hearts of Iron III Collection
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Crusader Kings II: The Old Gods
  • Cities in Motion
  • Dungeonland
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Prison Architect
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife
  • Cities: Skylines - Parklife Pre-Order
  • Stellaris: Apocalypse
  • Stellaris: Synthetic Dawn
  • Cities: Skylines - Mass Transit
  • Stellaris - Path to Destruction bundle
  • Cities: Skylines - Natural Disasters
  • Stellaris: Leviathans Story Pack
  • Stellaris: Digital Anniversary Edition
  • Stellaris
  • Magicka 2
  • Magicka: Wizard Wars Founder Wizard
  • 500k Club
  • War of the Roses
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • Crusader Kings II: Legacy of Rome
  • Teleglitch: Die More Edition
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Sunset Invasion
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
Nice! You actually beat Britain up - wow.

Prussia will be a sinch, once you've beaten Britain you can defeat anyone.
 

loki100

Field Marshal
22 Badges
Jul 1, 2008
7.559
5
  • Rome Gold
  • Mount & Blade: Warband
  • Victoria 2: A House Divided
  • Sword of the Stars
  • Semper Fi
  • Hearts of Iron II: Armageddon
  • Victoria: Revolutions
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Europa Universalis III Complete
  • Heir to the Throne
  • Hearts of Iron III
  • For the Motherland
  • Divine Wind
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Deus Vult
  • Crusader Kings II
  • Victoria 2
  • Warlock: Master of the Arcane
  • 500k Club
  • Crusader Kings II: Holy Knight (pre-order)
  • Pride of Nations
  • Rise of Prussia
well the war with Peru is clearly for Font purposes, now Africa is covered in but one long large scrawl its clear that Peru is just cluttering up S America

I'm surprised you whimped out with only 57% war score against the evil British ... I think this a worrying knock on effect of having 5.69% radicals who just weaken the nation's (pink) moral fibre.

and Spain's delightful mass revolt at the prospect of your take over was wonderfully timed