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Fyregecko

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I know nothing about Victoria, but I'm enjoying this anyway. Professionalism is evil! Let Sokoto remain the land of the plucky amateur!
 

Selzro

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Very impressive! Unrestrained by infamy, we now see what a central African (former) unciv is truly capable of!
 

sprites

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Oh , another label 'sokot south america' will offer new jobs for cartographers!
 

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British factories must be making bank off of all these Sokot invasions as the largest (in fact only, more or less) producer of clippers, especially since most of the ships are sinking en route and needing to be replaced. I bet they hope the incompetence will keep the Sokot down before they can turn on Britain, but Sokoto will (eventually) improve and overcome even them!
 

morningSIDEr

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Thank you profusely for the replies!

tamius23 - I'm quite intrigued by a font themed werewolf game, how does that work exactly?

I'm going after South America for the exact same reason you go after Uruguay so early, the lands are rich and poorly defended. Everything a warmonger dreams of!

naggy - Exactly so! Unsurprisingly the great Kabe wrote the song.

Vaya con Queso - Considering the stunning green of Sokoto's flag colour, the noble Orcs are clearly the most alike Sokoto. Itz time to crush more humies!

Tanzhang (譚張) - You are quite right! Sokoto is selflessly going out of her way to aid the nations left defenceless after the collapse of the Spanish empire, nobly giving them the protection of Sokoto's mighty armed forces.

aldriq - The great general and professor al-Walid is indeed busy attempting to free the nations of South America from the horror of independence into the welcoming embrace of Sokot tyranny!

I have to agree regarding the Diwani script, nothing is more epic!

Fyregecko - Believe me, you likely know more about V2 than I, you certainly couldn't make a bigger mess of playing the game!

loki100 - I think you should replace 'impressed' with 'horrified', large chunks of the world painted pink is a rather scary prospect!

Selzro - Thank you for the kind words (your bribe is en route). Indeed, ignoring infamy, not that the peaceful, rarely warring Sokoto is infamous of course, is allowing for considerable growth!

sprites - How right you are, the cartographers have been kept busy in this new update too!

Sybot - Sokoto is nothing if not a helpful nation and clearly her shipbuilders construct such poor ships merely to keep the British economy going!
 

morningSIDEr

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Chapter Eighteen - Unboliviable​

As Sokoto's armed forces have acquitted themselves surprisingly well over the last few years, Sokoto's officers are left rather annoyed when professionalism is nonetheless forced upon the army, research into 'Army Professionalism' completed in April.


The officers remain convinced that giving the troops proper training is a hugely foolish idea. This especially true as Sokot soldiers are already taught how to salute, mount suicidal charges, march, walk directly into cannon fire, fire their weapons and inflict high levels of friendly fire casaulties. How professional training can surpass this current amateur training is beyond them.

In order to show the world what an industrial powerhouse Sokoto has become, the government order for 'Experimental Railroad' to be researched next. 'Experimental' certainly the right word here as Sokoto's academics are currently attempting to make railroad tracks from rotten vegetables, hole ridden wood and brackish water. They are optimistic that said experiments will prove successful.

[I was not truly wishing to bother with any industrial tech at present but my hand was forced due to my own ridiculous stupidity. In recruiting so many guard brigades in so short a space of time I completely ruined my economy. I went from a surplus of £400 per day to hemorrhaging money at an alarming rate. Even cutting back spending in numerous areas I was still losing a great deal of cash, eventually stabilising at making a loss of 'only' -£200 per day. I really have struggled with the extra supply consumption cost on very hard difficulty, it makes balancing the economy far more difficult. Anyway, ruining the economy was far from my only major blunder during this update.]

The government is left hugely confused a few weeks later as they learn that Argentina has surrendered to Chile, handing over the province of Tucuman.


This despite Chile having no war score in her favour and no armed forces left with which to fight Argentina after Sokoto rushed to Argentina's aid and 'rescued' her from the warmongering Chile. With such an impressive display of ineptness Sokoto's government hurriedly begin attempting to hire Argentina's diplomats, who are clearly masters of diplomacy.

Having handed over a large chunk of her land for no reason whatsoever there is little surprise when Argentina is declared bankrupt a day later.


There is even less suprise when the Sokot National Bank admits to having given a large loan to Argentina. With the discovery that Sokoto's nemesis, the Ottomans, have also been given far more cash over the last few years, the finance minister is quickly applauded for his great work.

As support for war remains inexplicably low in Sokoto the government is forced into agreeing an overly lenient peace deal with Argentina.


All the more lenient considering the war is currently heavily in Sokoto's favour and Argentina seem happy to give her land away for no good reason at present, as shown by her peace deal with Chile. Unfortunately though the public has little appetite for war at present as for some reason matters such as the currently failing economy, the complete lack of democracy and the horrific inequality within the nation are considered more important issues.

[Here is massive blunder number two from this update, as will soon become apparent.]

Despite the distinct lack of enthusiasm for war at present the government does what it does best, completely ignoring the will of the public, as the diplomats are sent forth barely a week later.


The diplomats return several months later oddly wrapped in bandages. This due to their Egyptian counterparts insisting they accept the 'honour' of mummification after they delivered the decleration of war.

Egypt's meagre forces are soon crushed, allowing for Sokoto's troops to begin the horrifying business of besieging her lands. It is whilst Sokoto's troops are suffering horrific siege conditions that the government is given some startling news.


Prussia's war with Egypt instantly worries the government. If Prussia was to gain a direct border with Sokoto things could prove tense between both nations. Thankfully though the prospect of Prussia gaining a direct border with Sokoto looks disctinctly unlikely.


This because Prussia is demanding a region from Egypt, Farafra, which is entirely inaccessible to them unless they send troops accross barren, uncolonised wastelands. In failing to notice how inaccessible Farafra is, evidently Prussia have cartographers able to rival Sokoto's own in terms of their ability.

The government is left hugely shocked mere months later as it becomes clear that Sokoto's public still have little appetite for war.


This despite Sokoto defeating the mighty army of Egypt recently. This great feat something which the government had expected to improve support for war.

Rather than support war the most important issue for most of the public is that of voting reform. For some reason the fact that parliament is currently filled primarily with the rich and that parliament promotes and protects the interests of the rich over everyone else, does not sit well with the average dirt poor member of the public. Desperate to gain support for war, the government takes the drastic step of enacting voting reform.


Although the government makes sure to not go too far with said reform. Only members of the public with some assets, the middle class, are given the right to vote. It would be quite unthinkable to allow the common rabble to vote as well. They would likely do something ridiculous such as vote for a party other than the ruling, staunchly pro-upper class, Conservatives.

Unsurprisingly having enacted such sweeping democratic reform, which marginally dilutes the political power of the rich, Sokoto's public quickly become happy to support war once again.

[Here is major blunder number two. I had not noticed that Wealth Weighted Voting had become such a major issue for the nation, to the extent that it was keeping support for jingoism lower than it otherwise should be. As can be seen after passing the Weighted Wealth reform support for jingoism shot up. If I had but noticed this before ending my war with Argentina I would have had the jingoism necessary to gain yet more land from them. I truly am shockingly incompetent at this game.]

With Sokoto's economy still struggling the government decide that cuts must be made to the budget so as to stave off bankruptcy.


This the only option as it would be entirely unacceptable to instead increase the currently low taxes which the rich and middle class pay, as clearly the rich contribute more than enough. Instead a cut is made to national stockpile spending. Considering that Sokoto rarely engages in war and has but a small army to support, said cut should not prove too costly.

With Sokoto's troops now barely paid and only given minimal supplies the government decides that this is an excellent time to begin another war. The diplomats are sent forth.


The diplomats return a few days later looking surprisingly happy. For once they were treated with respect as their Bolivian counterparts were left hugely impressed by their uniforms. This little surprise as Bolivia is herself a highly fashionable nation which currently sports the same glorious pink for her map colour as Sokoto.

A month later and peace is agreed with Egypt.


Sokoto made sure to reward her comrade-in-arms in this war, Prussia, by taking the very land Prussia demanded. Sokoto is nothing if not an excellent ally.

Research into 'Experimental Railroad' comes to an end a few weeks later. Surprisingly rotten vegetables, hole ridden wood and brackish water proved poor material from which to create railroad tracks. Thankfully Sokoto's academics soon overcame this problem by instead using grass, string and brittle iron to make sturdy railroad tracks.


The academics are next ordered to begin research into the 'Practical Steam Engine'. The government believe such research should prove useful as Sokot engineers are currently unable to build working locomotives as they have no knowledge of how to construct a steam engine. This something of a slight problem as miles of the newly designed experimental railroad track is already being constructed without the locomotives available to use said track.

A month later the government decides that having conquered millions of people and gained control over vast swathes of land in the last few decades, it would be a good idea to hold a celebration to show the world how great Sokoto is.


Dignitaries from accross the world are invited to witness a grand parade to mark the occasion. There is then slight surprise when the parade instead turns into a protest. The many non-Hausa people Sokoto has conquered in the last few decades proving inexplicably unwilling to celebrate Sokoto's recent achievements.

A few weeks later, and memories of the protest quickly forgotten, the government is left very worried. With the swingeing cut made to stockpile spending the government is no longer able to afford supplying the army with much loved pink uniforms, Sokoto's soldiers having to instead make do with rather more mundane uniforms. Clearly this is likely to have an adverse effect on morale, the troops doubtless distraught at having lost their fashionable clothing. With such poor morale the government fears the army will face nothing but defeat against Bolivia.


Surprisingly morale actually rose dramatically when the troops were told they would no longer be supplied with pink uniforms. It almost as if they are glad to no longer be wearing pink.

With Bolivia's forces crushed and Sokoto's troops suffering through siege duty in Bolivia, the government receives the good news that Kuka is now fully colonised.


There is now a large and ever growing waiting list of Sokot citizens wishing to be chosen as participants in the next colonisation project in Darfur. For some reason ever increasing numbers of people remain desperate to leave Sokoto's poverty stricken, highly taxed, poorly governed states for life in the colonies. It almost as if the lower taxes and lessened government interference make colonial life better.

The government is left rather surprised and worried in August as they recieve news that a regiment in Ruwayshid is rather unhappy.


Quite why the colonial regiment is considering rebellion when it is barely paid, given minimal supplies and is led by some of Sokoto's highly competent and brilliant officers is a mystery.

As the war against Bolivia has been proceeding well, this due to Sokoto's troops desparetly attempting to bring fighting to an end before they completely run out of supplies, peace is soon agreed.


Sokoto's holdings in South America have grown considerably with this peace deal as Bolivia is left with a sole province, this happily allowing for yet more font to be added to the map. Of course Sokoto was completely justified in her warring with Bolivia, as she employed the much respected 'You Stole My Political Map Colour' casus belli.
 
Last edited:

unmerged(351041)

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Vaya con Queso - Considering the stunning green of Sokoto's flag colour, the noble Orcs are clearly the most alike Sokoto. Itz time to crush more humies!
I was hoping you'd say something like that. Let the glorious WAAAAAAAGH continue!

(By the way, where is the Kuka region?)
 

loki100

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This despite Chile having no war score in her favour and no armed forces left with which to fight Argentina after Sokoto rushed to Argentina's aid and 'rescued' her from the warmongering Chile. With such an impressive display of ineptness Sokoto's government hurriedly begin attempting to hire Argentina's diplomats, who are clearly masters of diplomacy.

Having handed over a large chunk of her land for no reason whatsoever there is little surprise when Argentina is declared bankrupt a day later.
It does seem like a foreign office to rival your own ...

and I very much approve of the Bolivian CB, that sort of thing should be indeed be the cause of war in more Paradox games.
 

LordTempest

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and I very much approve of the Bolivian CB, that sort of thing should be indeed be the cause of war in more Paradox games.
I would prefer a "clean up borders" CB personally. I don't like those two bits of Egypt sticking out like bald patches in that Sokoto Northern Africa map.

Techwise I would have gone for Mechanical Production, as it is a preq. to Interchangeable Parts, machine tools and ultimately, Suez (even though you have mentioned not building the canal) then go for PSE. As for Jingoism (and it is a bit gamey) try holding snap elections whenever you can to get those Jingoism boosting election events.
 

Fyregecko

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The officers remain convinced that giving the troops proper training is a hugely foolish idea. This especially true as Sokot soldiers are already taught how to salute, mount suicidal charges, march, walk directly into cannon fire, fire their weapons and inflict high levels of friendly fire casaulties. How professional training can surpass this current amateur training is beyond them.
Precisely. Professionalism will be the death of your military, I swear it. What of pluck?

In order to show the world what an industrial powerhouse Sokoto has become, the government order for 'Experimental Railroad' to be researched next. 'Experimental' certainly the right word here as Sokoto's academics are currently attempting to make railroad tracks from rotten vegetables, hole ridden wood and brackish water. They are optimistic that said experiments will prove successful.
Why not? Still works for the Edinburgh - Inverness line.

And I agree with loki100: more aesthetic Casus Belli need to be implemented. Clashing colours! Squinty country names!
 

sprites

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Chapter Eighteen - Unboliviable​
Of course Sokoto was completely justified in her warring with Bolivia, as she employed the much respected 'You Stole My Political Map Colour' casus belli.
Of course , this isn't EU3 , the 'I don't like your flag' casus belli is getting old!
 

naggy

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Good thing you passed voting reform when you did - the -1 MIL from Place in the Sun might have dropped you below the MIL threshold.
 

aldriq

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Nothing wrong with being colour-opportunisitic.... a pink map is the highest reward :)

morningSIDEr said:
Unboliviable
Of all your late puns this one has mentally-scarred me the most – I keep hearing it in my head in that certain brummie-accented-football-pundit voice :eek:
 

morningSIDEr

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Thank you profusely for the replies!

Vaya con Queso - Quite remiss of me to not show where it is during the update;


As you can see, it is just to the northeast of Sokoto's starting position. And yes, onwards with the WAAAAGH!

loki100 - Unfortunately the Italian diplomatic office proves far more shockingly insulting, as this update will show.

As for the 'You Stole My Political Map Colour' casus belli, surely Paradox will include it with all games soon.

Tanzhang (譚張) - I cannot agree more regarding Egypt's few remaining lands, I plan on 'liberating' them and painting them Sokoto's lovely pink as soon as I can!

You are quite right about Mechanical Production, I really should have gone for that rather than Practical Steam Engine, I hadn't even considered the Suez Canal though in honesty. With regards to jingoism, it is actually high enough at present, it is simply that reform issues are becoming too important at times, thus dragging it down further than should be the case. I should have enacted more political reforms when I had the chance!

Fyregecko - Exactly so! Plucky amatuerism is always preferrable to professionalism. As for the CB, I agree, anything to help out the all too often shockingly incompetent cartographers in Paradox games!

sprites - Quite so, the 'I don't like your flag' CB is too old now and need be replaced with new and wholly just CB!

naggy - It is surprising that gaining new colonies, be it via Place in the Sun or colonisation, continues to drop Sokoto militancy. Why so many of the Sokot public wish to escape to the lesser taxed, ignored by government colonies is beyond me.

aldriq - Indeed, Sokoto does not conquer lands for her own benefit but for that of the world! A pink map is a perfect map.

Now that you mention it, I greatly regret using the title. Adrian Chiles. *shudders*
 

morningSIDEr

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Chapter Nineteen - Nile Desperandum​

Having defeated a number of nations whilst paying the amy a pittance and giving them minimal supplies, the government reluctantly begins paying and supplying the soldiers fully once again.


Technology and conquests having saved the economy.

With the army now fully supplied, and morale inexplicably plummeting as the troops are given their pink uniforms once again, the diplomats are sent forth.


In an impressive display of diplomatic cunning from Sokoto Italy refrains from calling any of her allies to her aid as her enraged diplomats are too busy with other matters. Namely attempting to chase down the fleeing Sokot diplomats.

Quickly Sokoto's forces march forward, catching the bulk of Italy's army off-guard in Rome.


This the first battle for Sokoto's expensively assembled guard brigades, the brilliantly dressed troops charge forward, attacking Italy's green faced men. Italy's men understandably green with envy upon seeing the wonderful outift Sokoto's guards wear. Shocking rumours that they are actually green faced due to sickness caused by viewing the garish pink kilt and tigerskin shako combination of the guards clearly slanderous lies.

Whilst battle is met in Rome there is shock and consternation within the Sokot government as something wholly unexpected happens.


The Italian navy actually takes to sea.

Sokoto's guards achieve victory in Rome a week later. This a tough battle in which it looked as though Sokoto's elite guards would actually meet defeat until a gust of wind roared over the battlefield, lifting the guards kilts and rather decimating Italian morale. The Sokot army quickly appreciating why the Highland Charge is such a powerful tactic.


With this victory the guards are able to add a battle honour to their regimental colours, which are otherwise quite bare at present. Bare that is apart from a picture of an impoverished Sokot taxpayer, the defeat of Sokoto's economy the guards greatest conquest to date.

Victory follows victory for Sokoto as her guard heavy armies quickly crush Italy's forces.


These victories showing the intelligence in Sokoto's attacking towards the end of the year, autumn and winter usually periods when armies refrain from fighting. The windy weather at this time of the year providing a considerable advantage for Sokoto's guard brigades.

As Sokoto is well on her way to victory in Italy, the government send the diplomats forth.


Sokoto's diplomats return a few weeks later remarkably unscathed, having fled Peru whilst the Pervuian diplomats were busy perusing the densely worded decleration of war.

Unfortunately Sokoto has no guard brigades stationed in South America. However her South American forces do consist of pink clad infantry, artillery proficient in friendly fire and Sokoto's typically brilliant officers.


Brilliant officers indeed. The great Sharif Rumfa not only managing to travel from Italy, where he recently achieved victory, to Peru within a matter of days, he also manages to lose more men against the hugely outnumbered Peruvian force. His conduct in battle, and seeming powers of teleportation, is applauded by the Sokot army.

Research into 'Practical Steam Engine' comes to an end a short time later. With the completion of this research it quickly becomes clear that Sokoto's engineers are not only rather lacking when it comes to building ships, they are useless when constructing locomotives too. Rusting trains nonetheless soon taking to Sokoto's already disintegrating grass, string and brittle iron railroad tracks and prove unsurprisingly popular following an ad campaign which states the trains move as quickly as Sharif Rumfa.


Sokoto's academics next begin researching 'State and Government'. The Sokot government ordering this research as they want it to become abundantly clear to everyone that the job of the government is to gather taxes and then waste, uh, spend them as they see fit, appoint cronies to office, create numerous utterly pointless public bodies and vote to ever increase their own wages far above the rate of inflation.

The trivial matters of government, things such as healthcare, defence, the economy, social welfare and the like are issues for local state governments, not the national government. Thus the public should stop blaming the government for bungling in these areas as they are truly matters for local state governments.

The earlier fears of the government regarding Italy's navy prove well founded a month later as said navy sails past Sokoto's undefended rich Greek holdings, ignores choice targets such as the islands of Madasgacar, Zanzibar, Socotra and Bahrain and instead lands a single brigade in Sokot Argentina.


With this cunning amphibious landing the war is clearly lost.

Whilst forces are feverishly moved to defeat the dangerous landing in Viedma the army is left hugely proud a few days later as an officer shows the courage expected of any Sokot officer.


The average Sokot officer may flee in terror from battlefields but they are more than brave enough to beat insolent children.

This especially true as several highly skilled officers have recently been recruited into Sokoto's army.


Sokoto's recruiting officer especially pleased at having recruited a man of Muhammad Kabe's considerable skill after having become tired of Zamnagawa's amateurish ineffieciency.

A few days later and Sokoto's geographers approach the government wishing to win the Royal Geographic Society's award.


The government is more than happy to lavish money on this enterprise. There is simply slight surprise when Sokoto's delighted geographers board a ship heading to the Caribbean, rather than Egypt as the government had expected, their luggage curiously more suited for a holiday than an expedition.

In a remarkable show of poor form Italy inexplicably has Sokoto's proud name discredited in the Ottoman Empire. This achieved after several Italian diplomats dressed in disgustingly garish bright pink, green and yellow costumes, posing as Sokot diplomats whilst they made several disparaging remarks about the Ottoman government.


Quite how the Ottoman government was fooled by these shockingly underhanded tactics is beyond the Sokot government. After all a Sokot diplomat would never wear so unfashionable a costume. Yellow an entirely inappropriate colour. The government is also confused by Italy's actions, they cannot understand why Italy would seek to discredit the proud name of the peace loving Sokoto.

Two days later and peace is agreed.


There truly is no justification for Italy's wholly unacceptable diplomatic actions, she has no reason to dislike Sokoto.
 
Last edited:

LordTempest

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You mean you haven't researched N&I yet!?! *faints*

Hopefully you can get S&G and N&I done within the next four years so you're ready for Machine Guns first thing. Too bad you aren't playing AHD, otherwise you'd have plenty of NFs for colonisation by now.
 

loki100

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This the first battle for Sokoto's expensively assembled guard brigades, the brilliantly dressed troops charge forward, attacking Italy's green faced men. Italy's men understandably green with envy upon seeing the wonderful outift Sokoto's guards wear. Shocking rumours that they are actually green faced due to sickness caused by viewing the garish pink kilt and tigerskin shako combination of the guards clearly slanderous lies.
ohhhh ... poor little tiggers ... does this mean more wars towards countries where tigers actually live? That would be another good CB - "you control my desired fashion accessory?"


Research into 'Practical Steam Engine' comes to an end a short time later. With the completion of this research it quickly becomes clear that Sokoto's engineers are not only rather lacking when it comes to building ships, they are useless when constructing locomotives too. Rusting trains nonetheless soon taking to Sokoto's already disintegrating grass, string and brittle iron railroad tracks and prove unsurprisingly popular following an ad campaign which states the trains move as quickly as Sharif Rumfa.
wonderful image ... I await a view of the poster

It seems as if you're running out of stuff to conquer that doesn't actually put you adjacent to a Great Power?