Ridiculous

[unmerged(489981)]

I am seriously about to rage. This is by far the worst paradox game yet I sink so many hours into it for some reason. I played as the Teutonic Order, formed a nice little realm for myself by gutting Lithuania, Poland, and slices of Novgorod. But Bohemia, led by the Anti-Christ, is able to summon vast demons from hell with insane force limits making it impossible to stop their hell spawn intent on receiving a province that shouldn't even be theirs, with their core magically popping there. My only allies involve Mazovia, Riga, and Pomerania which are only because I vassalized them. My other allies are pointless Kingdoms floundered about Europe with no hope to me whatsoever. And that situation doesn't seem to be improving as no one who can at least dent Bohemia is willing to ally with me because they know the storm of Apocalypse that will seep through my lands. I can excommunicate them, but that never does anything, because no one attacks them for it, and their pact with the Devil keeps rebellions from damaging them. Now I would gladly cede Torun(the province fancied by the Anti-Christ) if it meant they would just leave me and my people alone. But even my strongest of fights become pitiful since they can outnumber me five to one so my elite and disciplined warriors of God don't matter because it is impossible to fight at those odds. This means they'll like accept nothing but carving me in half by freeing Lithuania and any other servants of evil.

Attrition you may say? Well you're wrong, that won't work, because with their vast riches taken from the poor souls suffering eternal damnation they can just build more as it fits them. So whatever demons that are cast back to hell come right back through the crack in Prague and fight my heavenly knights and send their souls to heaven regardless. Attrition would be even more unthinkable, when it will gut my economy and kill my manpower. Which Bohemia seemingly has plenty of.

What exactly, I am supposed to do?

 

[RobRoy3]

What exactly, I am supposed to do?

1) Avoid conflict with Holy Roman Emperor - this is usually trivially easy if you don't take any of the HRE provinces or declare war on any member of the HRE.

2) Seek alliance with Holy Roman Emperor - Easiest on first turn of game, but also possible when/if both of you have few or no current allies.

3) Become Holy Roman Emperor, yourself.

None of these steps work for current situation, of course. Best you can do is try to minimize loss in current war and see if you can improve the situation later (even step one is usually sufficient with the HRE), but you could be screwed, at this point, and have to restart.

 

[unmerged(489981)]

I tried avoiding conflict with the Emperor, but once I got scared of them and excommunicated them they had a blood feud with me and I have been attempting to appease the Emperor with whatever I can(I can't just give out 100 gifts, their sixty a piece)

 

[unmerged(62860)]

If you want avoid conflict with a nation then avoid a common border. Having a common broder will set their sights on you.

 

[chals]

& dont get ecommunicated - its quite realistisk - the AI shoud get prestige to DOW you realy since your an apostate - and they are gona set "His peaple free"

 

[WeissRaben]

You excommunicated one of the most powerful rulers in Europe and now you "rage" about the "worst paradox game" giving you what you called for? What next, you will rage because France annexed your Savoy after sending them an insult? It is quite normal to make errors while learning to play, but coming here to snarl about them and pretending the mistakes were made from Paradox is ridiculous. Please, tone down.

 

[The-King]

I'm guessing you don't have military drill or you're lacking in land technology, that or you're too stingy to build enough of an army for yourself to defend bohemia.

 

[unmerged(204522)]

form an alliance with austria?

 

[G_Morgan]

First time I played this game I started as Brandenburg. I didn't understand why I couldn't declare war on anyone.

You get used to it. There are various things you need to understand to make the game viable. As someone mentioned Military Drill is almost a must. I don't think there is a decision remotely comparable to it (other than maybe abusing Church Attendance Day for the iconography decision, then switching to drill).

 

[chals]

ur not ur own master as ur not indepentent

 

[Atlanteax]

Sounds like patch 5.2 would address OP's issues.

 

[Ricox]

Call a game bad because you have no idea of how the game mechanics work. That's great, right?


Facepalm, if you ask for help, then don't call it the worst Paradox title or you can go wherever you wish to, none's holding you back. All that is happening in your game is so easily explained by anyone who has "sunk so many hours into this game" and has basic knowledge of various random events (ex. the one that gives you a core on a random bordering province, damnit), Holy Roman Empire, wars, alliances and other game mechanics/features.

 

[brifbates]

You excommunicated one of the most powerful rulers in Europe and now you "rage" about the "worst paradox game" giving you what you called for? What next, you will rage because France annexed your Savoy after sending them an insult? It is quite normal to make errors while learning to play, but coming here to snarl about them and pretending the mistakes were made from Paradox is ridiculous. Please, tone down.

This man speaks truth.

yes, excommunicating him painted a target on his back for other nations to aim at BUT the HREmp is not someone many nations CAN take a shot at. However, by doing so you torpedoed the relations between your two nations and having poor relations with a neighbor that can swing a bigger bat than you is not a good idea

 

[Pacius Ferox]

Perhaps the Bohemia thinks it's your Teutons who are the anti-Christ. Diplomacy and past record counts in this 'worst Paradox game by far'.

 

[Ricox]

You excommunicated one of the most powerful rulers in Europe and now you "rage" about the "worst paradox game" giving you what you called for? What next, you will rage because France annexed your Savoy after sending them an insult? It is quite normal to make errors while learning to play, but coming here to snarl about them and pretending the mistakes were made from Paradox is ridiculous. Please, tone down.

And yeah, this pretty much explains it as well.

You could even compare, to some extent, declaring war on the Ottomans as, say, Oldenburg, just to keep you in the war so you could get "Crusade" modifier or something of the sort, and then complain because the Ottomans come for you and invade you, and then call EU3 the worst Paradox game so far, because the AI actually fights against you. Despite the fact that it's pretty terrible at it, but pissing off to an enormous extent your powerful neighbour and then crying like a little baby and throwing acussations of how everything's wrong except your own reckless actions?

 

[unmerged(489981)]

I'm not complaining that I was invaded. I expected this to happen. Stop trying to flame. I have already admitted excommunicating may have been a mistake but I did that because I re-loaded after having learned they were going to invade me a year later. So I excommunicated them hoping that would buy me some time. The only way to postpone their attack was doing this, and it worked. It bought me about I decade which I desperately spent attempting to increase my forcelimits, but the emperor's limits are mind bogglingly huge.

I have drill and equal land tech. And I can defeat Bohemia when outnumbered. I win the war when it first starts, but that doesn't last long since they can field three times the men I can.

And yeah, this pretty much explains it as well.

You could even compare, to some extent, declaring war on the Ottomans as, say, Oldenburg, just to keep you in the war so you could get "Crusade" modifier or something of the sort, and then complain because the Ottomans come for you and invade you, and then call EU3 the worst Paradox game so far, because the AI actually fights against you. Despite the fact that it's pretty terrible at it, but pissing off to an enormous extent your powerful neighbour and then crying like a little baby and throwing acussations of how everything's wrong except your own reckless actions?

Nice flame, learn to read before you try to make petty and pathetic attacks on the OP. I wrote the OP in a humorous tone but apparently you could not comprehend this.

I explained in my previous post why the excommunication was necessary.

There was no way too survive and not excommunicate them as I explained in my other post.

ur not ur own master as ur not indepentent

I don't know what this means since I'm not in the HRE(I tried)

Call a game bad because you have no idea of how the game mechanics work. That's great, right?


Facepalm, if you ask for help, then don't call it the worst Paradox title or you can go wherever you wish to, none's holding you back. All that is happening in your game is so easily explained by anyone who has "sunk so many hours into this game" and has basic knowledge of various random events (ex. the one that gives you a core on a random bordering province, damnit), Holy Roman Empire, wars, alliances and other game mechanics/features.

I enjoy your attempt to flame, but you could try harder.

From now on people who flame shall be put on my ignore list, so please stop, and avoid posts like the person above.

 

[Sidereus]

One thing you might try, if you haven't already, is some of the other diplomatic options. These will help you to at least stay at 100 relations for cheap cost. And for all I know, there may be internal mechanics at work to further predispose a nation to you for having these options.

• War subsidies, even a pittance, gives 1.20 relations per year. You might not like to help your enemy when fighting someone else, but they might appreciate you for it.
• Trade agreement: 0.6. They might agree to this.
• Proclaim guarantee: 0.96. You can always do this one. At least if you help them out in a war, they can't fight you at the same time.
• Ask for military access: 0.30. This one might not work either, but the AI often does funny things. They grant it quite often.

Again, these may not help, but anything is worth a shot if you're in a bind.

 

[unmerged(489981)]

One thing you might try, if you haven't already, is some of the other diplomatic options. These will help you to at least stay at 100 relations for cheap cost. And for all I know, there may be internal mechanics at work to further predispose a nation to you for having these options.

• War subsidies, even a pittance, gives 1.20 relations per year. You might not like to help your enemy when fighting someone else, but they might appreciate you for it.
• Trade agreement: 0.6. They might agree to this.
• Proclaim guarantee: 0.96. You can always do this one. At least if you help them out in a war, they can't fight you at the same time.
• Ask for military access: 0.30. This one might not work either, but the AI often does funny things. They grant it quite often.

Again, these may not help, but anything is worth a shot if you're in a bind.

I've tried those, and they would work if it was long term. But I've tried everything and they are intent on my death.

I would offer a royal marriage, but I am sadly a Theocracy

 

[Sidereus]

Did you try just selling them the province? Not that the AI won't eat stability hits for wars without a CB, I know...

 

[Kagernaut]

This is a very frustrating game, where "when it rains it pours."

There have been times where I have been just plain fed up and stopped playing. But, after playing some more and asking a few questions, I enjoy it more.

Still, I completely sympathize with your situation. There is sometimes nothing you can do, and it often feels like the AI is unfairly targeting you when you are just minding your own business.

As for your situation, its the hazard of playing this game, and playing as a country with a big neighbor. The AI sometimes is just far more powerful than it should be. There are things you can do, but often you have to go out of your way just to get a little stability.