Ragin' Rurikovitches - A Multiplayer Russian AAR

[Xenophon13]

Welcome to Ragin’ Rurikoviches, a hopefully humorous multiplayer AAR about the trials and tribulations of the Rurikovich dynasty. I will be starting as the Duchy of Polotsk and my good friend NebulousSketch will be beginning as the Duchy of Novgorod. We will be playing cooperatively, with the ultimate goal of forming the empire of Russia, and we will each be writing updates from our perspective. This is our first attempt at an AAR, (and my first real attempt at playing CK2) so advice and criticism is welcome. We have however played a ways ahead, so any advice given probably won’t be used for a few updates.

Also, our system of naming children probably deserves a note. We both give our children …distinctive names… in order to make things slightly more amusing and preclude any attempt at seriousness in our writing.

Here’s some more info:

Version: Vanilla 1.06b

Start Date: 1066

House Rules: None yet. So far neither one of us knows many gamey tactics, and because we’re not playing against each other, there is little point to using them anyways.

We’ve played until 1115 or so, and although it had a somewhat slow start, things have gotten pretty interesting.
Oh, and it’s going to start as an epic poem! Much credit for the idea should go to Selzro’s peerless Sing a Septinsular Song, which you should go read if you haven’t already.

Well, here goes nothing…

 

[Xenophon13]

So, in days long gone in the land of Rus,
Lived a warlike duke, with children profuse.
He was the overlord of Polotsk,
Nowadays referred to as Belarus.

His very fine wife, her name was Sofia,
Was a very skilled scholar,
Mistress of ideas.

Now Rus in these days, was a quite wretched hole
So off to Byzantium the spymaster would go,
To steal some ideas for the betterment of all
(or perhaps some new weapons,
Those would work too)

To increase his taxes,
He’d build up his holdings,
He hates to min-max,
But he needed those goldings. (Sorry)

To strengthen his realm,
Make succession secure,
He switched his laws,
To Primogeniture.
Now he could be sure,
Of his offspring’s tenure.

His one lawful heir,
Count Gleb he was called,
Was a lustful young man,
(His family was appalled)
It was ‘cause of this,
That there was lots of talk,
When he was tutored by pretty, 16-year-old
Vlacheslava of Haradok.

Now Vseslav, though a warrior at his best,
Knew how to spend his downtime and rest,
With fine summer fairs,
And spirited hunts,
(He even saw a white stag, but just once)

Justice he tended to deal out with glee,
Nailing hats on to heads just to hear envoys scream,
Some might say it was an ignoble deed,
But it brought him some measure of respect and prestige.

But peace in his realm was a short lived affair,
Since 1066, it lasted only one year,
For soon pesky cousins would knock on his door,
Inviting him into a great holy war.

 

[Darkgamma]

Dat metric.
I'm following this.

 

[SiikFajitas]

Following, don't dissapoint

 

[Xenophon13]

Dat metric.
I'm following this.

Glad to have you along!

Following, don't dissapoint

We'll do our best, but remember that it is our first attempt at AAR writing, so things may be a little rough at times.

 

[NebulousSketch]

So I'll just go ahead and do a bit of an introduction before I post my first update. We're writing the same story from two different perspectives: one from Novgorod, the other from Polotsk. We're also writing in different styles. There's no good reason other than we don't write the same way. I don't take very good screenshots, so hopefully the writing will make up for the shoddy pictures. Also, mine doesn't rhyme, which is of course because it's a rough translation from the Russian original. Finally, thanks for the interest you're already showing. Hope we don't disappoint. So without further ado... The Tale of Novgorod.

 

[NebulousSketch]

Oh! The Dukes and counts of Rus had fought
For control of the great plains of Eastern Europe,
Fighting alongside kin, fighting alongside brothers;
Fighting against kin, fighting against brothers.

In the year of our Lord 1047 a son was born
To Iziaslav of Novgorod, son of Yaroslav I of Novgorod and Ingegerd Olofsdotter.
Mstislav, he was named; a name to guide
The Rurikovich dynasty to greatness.
He was the second son of the great Iziaslav,
The first being Yaropolk, heir to Iziaslav’s throne.
The child Mstislav was a quiet one, devoted to God
And to his studies.
Yet upon coming of age a fiery passion was lit
And he pressured his father to let him rule
A corner of the great Russian land.
Isiazlav did not give in, and instead
Had Mstislav married to Predslava,
One of the lowborn wenches of Novgorod.

Mstislav did not react,
But rather began his plotting to rule over his father.
Though their marriage was but a sham
Mstislav came to love and admire his wife.
Predslava soon became a close adviser and friend
And much boning ensued.
A son named Rostislav was born in 1065 to much rejoicing.
Mstislav continued to press for his own duchy, and
When he was 19, his father bequeathed
Novgorod, keeping Galich for himself.
Mstislav’s young half-brother Sviatopolk ruled Zaozerye as a vassal
And Pskov was given to a regent to rule
Until young Rostislav could.

Mstislav and Iziaslav, Father and son, duke and duke, ruled duchies
Separate yet allies.
A few short months of peace passed
As Msislav, son of Isiazlav put his house in order
Until in the cold winter of 1066-67 Izaislav began
A war to bring the true faith of God to the heathens in Lithuania.
As a good son and servant of God,
Mstislav sent his soldiers and vassals to war
And soon the Pagans of Zhmud
Knew the name of Rurikovich.

The war for Lithuania progressed
And another child was born to Mstislav and Predslava
This first daughter of Mstislav
Inherited the traditional
Rurikovich name of Duraaramplerock.
Mstislav thanked God for the gift of a daughter
And she was soon betrothed to Rogvolod of Polotsk,
Son of Duke Vseslav II of Polotsk.

The joyous news was soon followed by the news
Of Predeslava’s third pregnancy,
And the victory of the Rurikoviches in Lithuania.
Zhmud was now in the wise hands of Isiazlav.

Mstislav praised God for their victory over the heathens
And by the end of the week was plotting his own war
To teach the heathens the meaning of God
Through the sword.

 

[Xenophon13]

In 1067, the Galichians chose,
To wage war against some Lithuanian bros.
Latgalis, Zemgalians, and Tartus alike,
Found their deaths at the end of a strong Russian pike.

For ten or so years,
The Russians did fight,
Inspiring terror,
As was their divine right.

After battles and sieges (and technology gains),
The wars were all won, they had caused enough pain.

And Polotsk was no longer landlocked and alone,
And Vseslav was happy as he sat on his throne.

All of the fighting had taken its toll,
But the brave Russian soldiers,
So strong and so bold,
Had brought the Baltic into a brave new world,
And made men wealthy with plundered pagan gold.

Despite all of the action,
Vseslav grew quite fat,
And it drove him to distraction,
When it became a new nickname.

Now rumors were stirring,
Of a regent that was scheming,
In the duchy of Rostov,
Of a realm to be enduring,
Not so foolish was his dreaming.
For in the mid 1070’s
His ward took on the crown,
Of the Kingdom of Rus,
He would gain great renown.

Vseslav agreed,
To join this new state,
But King Danil was quite young,
And was the subject of some hate.
What should happen next,
Was the subject of debate.

 

[Portal]

This would be approximately 2.43 times more awesome in haiku.

 

[Xenophon13]

This would be approximately 2.43 times more awesome in haiku.

Golden Mongol Hordes
Bring across the asian steppe
Great poetic change.

Perhaps for one or two updates eventually, but it's about 2.43 times the work as well, so we'll see.

 

[PineconeKing]

I sense some inter-realm plotting now that one player is subject to t'other.

 

[NebulousSketch]

I sense some inter-realm plotting now that one player is subject to t'other.

No one's subject to anyone yet. Rus just happens to be nearly the same color as Novgorod, but in fact we both swear fealty to an NPC. At least for the time being. Once I get my update up that'll be a little more clear. :happy:

 

[Xenophon13]

To our few but awesome readers:

If you haven't already, you can vote here in the AARland Choice awards. You probably should vote for an AAR that's a little further along, but if you do put in a vote for us, let us know.

Also, Nebulous will have the next update posted with in the next couple days.

 

[NebulousSketch]

So sorry about the long delay. +10 prestige to the one who figures out why. Without further ado....

 

[NebulousSketch]

Update 2

Two tribes fell to the forces of Novgorod
Taught to revere Mstislav, son of the great Iziaslav,
And given the word of God.

Duke Mstislav fathered two more sons:
The great Popblaster Mcfistycuff
And Boopadonkereedoo.
By 1074 Mstislav was the proud father of 4 children
And the ruler of two more tribes of heathens.
Life was good.
Predslava gave birth
To thier fifth and sixth sons; twins,
Named Hurmahurmadur and Hurmahurmadur-too.
With his borders secure
And the succession to his throne safe,
A fire was lit in his belly to rule over more.
Mstislav began to plot.
His dear half-brother, Count Yaropolk of Grodno
As heir to the Duchy of Galich
Was the first to fall under Mstislav’s calculating gaze.
The plans came together nicely
To do away with Yaropolk
And clear a path to the Duchy of Galich.

Gradislava, Yaropolk’s loving wife,
Did the evil deed, sawing through the balcony supports
And sending Count Yaropolk tumbling to his death.

All of this plotting did set Mstislav on fire
And to sate his desire turned to
The pleasures of the flesh,
Indulging in unbridled hedonism.

Duke Iziaslav, father of Duke Mstislav,
Wept for his eldest son, his life cut short in 1075
But did not suspect Mstislav,
Follower of God and obedient son.
In 1076 Duke Vsevolod of Rostov
Found his title lacking
And declared himself King of Rus.

The other dukes were hesitant at first
Uncertain as to the validity
Of this new title.
Yet one by one,
They swore fealty,
But Novgorod waited.
Mstislav’s plans were still in their infancies
And he did not swear fealty to the new king
Until his plots had been carried out.

The following year, Mstislav had laid the plans
To remove his Niece Vasilisa, daughter of Yaropolk
And newly crowned countess of Grodno,
Which would make him the heir to Galich.

In Febuary of 1077 she died in an unfortunate accident
And across the land of Grodno the people wept for the young girl.
Mstislav spent hours every day
Praying before the altar for his soul
Content in the knowledge that God
Would not fault him for hungering for power.
Within a few months another plot was laid
This one for the great Duke Iziaslav.

An assassin was sent to do the dirty deed
But was captured and confessed,
Revealing the name of Mstislav.
All the Rurikovich family gave up Mstislav,
Branding him a kinslayer.

But Mstislav tried again and succeeded,
Killing his father and claiming
The Duchy of Galich, united with Novgorod.
Murder of his kinsmen did not sit well on his conscience.
Mstislav became restless,
He participated in skirmishes,
But never committed to full battle.
A short war he fought
To conquer the Russians in Pinsk
Once ruled by his father.
He soon ruled their lands again,
Leaving only Kiev independent of Iziaslav’s old lands.

A few short weeks after his father had died,
Mstislav swore fealty to King Vsevolod
Making Rus the greatest kingdom
Ever to be seen in the east.

As the decade passed into the 1080s, however,
Mstislav began his ploys again,
Hungry for the power of a king.

 

[Xenophon13]

Update 3

Well in this new kingdom,
There was little peace,
As king Danil’s wars seemed never to cease.
And served no purpose but to make Russia weak.

Now Vseslav had loyalty as one of his virtues,
If you hurt his king, he would have to hurt you,
So at first he partook in this constant warfare,
Gaining glory in battle,
And grey in his hair.

But then he was approached by Mstilsav of Novgorod,
Said Mstislav, “I’m tired of this silliness, by God!
Your true loyalty should lie with our nation,
And not with some twerp hoisted above his station!
I’m inviting you into a little piece of intrigue,
For our stupid king is well out of his league!”
Mstislav you see, had a claim on the throne,
But he knew he could not go at it alone.
He needed an ally to help him rebel,
And so Vseslav agreed, and said, “Very well.”

So they started their war,
And at first it went fine,
They raised their score,
And did it in good time.

All of the vassals of Vseslav’s domain,
Took up arms to end Danil’s reign.
Even Mayor Voislav, who had no more soldiers,
Grabbed his old bow and slung it over his shoulders,
Willing to go to battle alone,
And army of one, brave but misguided,
But not before long he would get go home.

For then king Danil, their former Lord,
Called his neighbor Ryazan into the war.

Outnumbered, and realizing the end was nigh,
Mstislav struck up a bargain, which favored both sides.
White peace was agreed,
So the Dukes would stay free,
But under the yoke of their young feudal liege.

________________________

Shorter update today, but we've both been pretty busy. Feedback is welcome!