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There is no need to over do it, buddy. It crushes me when you update on your personal troubles as I am one who wonders. Take care of yourself. There is time enough to do the counting and we will be here when you do. Always!
 
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There is no need to over do it, buddy. It crushes me when you update on your personal troubles as I am one who wonders. Take care of yourself. There is time enough to do the counting and we will be here when you do. Always!
Hope people don't feel like I overshare. I tend to easily do that. But this community is special to me, and you guys are more than casual online friends to me. I enjoy contributing however I can.
 
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Take care of yourself @Nikolai! We’re always here for you.
 
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As you well know, it is special to me as well. You are all family. Overshare, sir. Every time. We want to know because we care.
 
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Thanks guys. It's been a downhill battle for 20 years now. I am soon 37, pretty young, but my body aches. I have problems getting my freaking socks on in the morning! If I go on my knees, I have problems getting up. My Tourettes means every day of my life has been tiresome in some ways, but it's getting worse. My anxiety comes from it, it will never go away I'm told and it makes life often quite difficult. For me, but more importantly for the ones I love, especially my wife. Medication helps, but only so far, and only for a while.

My diabetes has a lot of complications that keeps getting worse, the most problematic meaning I now - after 15 or so years of being nauseus every day, at a GOOD day throwing up only once or twice a day, a seldom time not, sometimes 8-10-15 times a day - have to go on meds that are made for people in cancer treatment to get through the day without throwing up or being nauseus.

The same complication means my bowels are a mess. I literally shit myself for a good word if I don't use meds to stop it, and even then I need to get to a toilet immidiately if I need to go to the toilet. I use allergy meds daily year round, as I am constantly allergic.

On top of this, or perhaps because of it, I need extreme amounts of sleep. When I am working I get up between 5-6 AM, work full days, get home, eat and go to sleep early, often 5 or 6 pm. Wake up 5-6 am and feel like I haven't slept at all. Rinse and repeat. When I am on sick leave, as now, I go to bed between 9 and 12 most days, sleep until at least 11 am even if I go to bed 9 pm, get up, have to sleep 2-4 hours arond 2 pm, often need to sleep more around 6 pm, often another 1-2 hours.

I have worked since I was 20. I have yet to keep a single job as I keep getting into sick leave s my body and mind just don't cope. I do well for 1, 2, perhaps 3 months and then I just can't continue. But you know, good boys don't give up. So I keep pressing myself. Am positive. Do stuff, work, games, reading, family, friends, always feeling like a failure (it turns out people with Tourettes often critizise everything, trying to "fit" into a mold they can't fit into, or it's not uncommon. I have so high standards for myself it's crazy). And now, now I have given up.

And then, now, I fear my positive attitude to life and need to see the positive things in everything (a good personality trait usually!) means I will somehow be deemed too well to get the disability I need. Or at least as much percentage as I need. Social security will for the next month, month and a half test and evaluate me to determine where between 0 and 100% disability I will be placed. Since I am so young and highly educated, they said that last I talked to them, they needed to convince their bosses...

So. There. Overshared. I just needed to get it out I guess. Sorry folks. :)
 
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POTY! I cannot tell you how many people that come here feel or experience some or so much the same. They just don't say it. YOU are NOT a failure!

EVER!

It is brave to share that and while I cannot personally assist in any of those troubles, we all here love you and have for over 20 years! Do not feel sorry and just keep us informed and know that we keep you in mind. You are a special cat, @Nikolai. One of the best!
 
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Sorry folks
I can't speak for everyone here, but I'm pretty sure they would all agree that you should never be sorry to vent and share here. This is a community, and a community comes together in the time of need for any of its members.
 
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POTY! I cannot tell you how many people that come here feel or experience some or so much the same. They just don't say it. YOU are NOT a failure!

EVER!

It is brave to share that and while I cannot personally assist in any of those troubles, we all here love you and have for over 20 years! Do not feel sorry and just keep us informed and know that we keep you in mind. You are a special cat, @Nikolai. One of the best!

I can't speak for everyone here, but I'm pretty sure they would all agree that you should never be sorry to vent and share here. This is a community, and a community comes together in the time of need for any of their members.
This was nice to wake up to today. Thanks guys. :)
 
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Sorry to hear about the continuing health issues @Nikolai, it can of course be very debilitating. I have very close experience of something broadly similar (though not with as deep physical aspects) in my family, which also ended in a disability finding as a young adult. it did help, and in our system doesn’t stop them working a day or two a fortnight, volunteering for a charity and running a small self-funded ‘hobby business’ from home and having a large online friendship and support group. I hope you can work through the administrative maze and obstacle course these things can be to come to something that works best for you.

Time can turn as slowly as it needs to and you should feel comfortable taking as much of it as you need, as is always the case in AARLand. :) Take care, my friend.
 
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Hello there! (forum replies: General Kenobi)

I am finally finished tallying the votes! :D I won't post it just yet, it took some time and energy. Last week has been a hell of anxiety, throwing up 8-12 times a day, lots of pain in all parts of the body and cancelled birthday visit to my niece and a trip to a friend. Not complaining, that much at least. But I notice I am falling way behind on my AAR reading, only keeping up with a select few. A thing that used to give me so much fun. :( At least writing AARs still give some energy, so I have actually posted a new one lately, in Stellaris, and posted five chapters (written one and a half more). So there is that!

Anyways, follow this space for the results, soon (tm)! :D
 
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Thanks for the note, @Nikolai and do not feel any pressure. We'll be here whenever you get to it and appreciate that you are still working on not just that but your own work. Keep your chin up as much as you can, buddy. :)
 
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It is here folks! The results of the Q4 2022 ACAs!

FIrst out is EU4, where seven AARs were nominated, ending in a victory for @Tommy4ever , followed by @coz1 on second place and @Revan86 on third:


Next up is the grand old man, CK2, where eleven works were given the nod, ending in a tie for first place between @Eludio and @Midnite Duke ! Second place was also a tie, this time between @Bullfilter and @LPDK 356 . Third place was given to @streaker77 :

Crusader Kings II
VotesNameAuthorLink
5To The Strongest - A Hellenistic Resurgence AAREludiohttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/to-the-strongest-a-hellenistic-resurgence-aar.1482259/
5Avon Las ObservesMidnite Dukehttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/avon-las-observes.1461266/
4Blood and Empire: A Clash of CivilisationsBullfilterhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/blood-and-empire-a-clash-of-civilisations.1561249/
4Song of the Karlings: Karloman's LegacyLPDK 356https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/song-of-the-karlings-karlomans-legacy.1446168/
3The Dragons Realm, A House Targaryen AARstreaker77https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-dragons-realm-a-house-targaryen-aar.1517886/
2CK2AGOT - Breaker of Chains and Mother of DragonsThaigahttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...aker-of-chains-and-mother-of-dragons.1468096/
2Wings of Faith, Wings of Fury - A Slavic Pagan Revival AARSuperstormhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...s-of-fury-a-slavic-pagan-revival-aar.1486890/
2Road of Queens - CKII India AAREurasiahttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/road-of-queens-ckii-india-aar.1035262/
1The Last Days of the Han (Three Kingdoms AAR)Zamarak500https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-last-days-of-the-han-three-kingdoms-aar.1425568/
1Blut und Schlacht (Blood and Battle): A Learner’s SagaBullfilterhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...cht-blood-and-battle-a-learners-saga.1045928/
1Tale of the Clubfoot (A House Strong AAR) CK2 AGOT Mod AARLPDK 356https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...-a-house-strong-aar-ck2-agot-mod-aar.1557522/

The not-so-new-anymore successor CK3 saw only five nominees this time, with @Werther taking first place, @Koweth and @Peter Ebbesen sharing second place and @Revan86 taking third:

Crusader Kings III
VotesNameAuthorLink
4Crowns of the LevantWertherhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/completed-crowns-of-the-levant.1513118/
3Pax Britannica – A Great Britain AARKowethhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/pax-britannica-a-great-britain-aar.1532388/
3Born to Breed: House of the ProphetsPeter Ebbesenhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...scenes-nsfw-in-puritanical-societies.1470942/
2The Lions of Olomouc: a CKIII Ironman AAR (Duchy of Moravia, 867)Revan86https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...iii-ironman-aar-duchy-of-moravia-867.1479193/
1Jewish Alps- A Paradox Megacampaign AAR- Part1 - Crusader Kings 3Bfc kfchttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...acampaign-aar-part1-crusader-kings-3.1533473/

The old and distringuished lady, Victoria II, also got five stories nominated, with @DensleyBlair taking first place, followed by @Eurasia and @HistoryDude sharing second place. Third place was shared between @zenphoenix and @BigBadBob :

Victoria II
VotesAuthorLink
4Echoes of A New Tomorrow: Life after Revolution in the Commonwealth of BritainDensleyBlairhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...ution-in-the-commonwealth-of-britain.1201433/
3Victoria II - Japan - AAREurasiahttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/victoria-ii-japan-aar.1533825/
3The Rise of RussiaHistoryDudehttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-rise-of-russia.1451901/
1The Hohenzollern Empire 5: Holy Phoenix - An Empire of Jerusalem Megacampaign in New World Orderzenphoenixhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...alem-megacampaign-in-new-world-order.1022999/
1For All We Have and Are: Britain in the Great War - (1901 Series)BigBadBobhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...britain-in-the-great-war-1901-series.1401290/

The new and frisk lady on the block, Victoria 3, also got firve works nominated, with @Chilango2 securing first place, followed by @hjarg on second. Third place was shared between me, @ThunderHawk3 and @witchveil :

Victoria 3
VotesAuthorLink
4Dreams of an Honest World - a Mexico V3 AARChilango2https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/dreams-of-an-honest-world-a-mexico-v3-aar.1554937/
3An Empire Where the Sun Always Rises- A Japan V3 AARhjarghttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...-the-sun-always-rises-a-japan-v3-aar.1553051/
1Swedes Ahoy! The Story of My First Victoria 3 CampaignNikolaihttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...tory-of-my-first-victoria-3-campaign.1552285/
1Back In The Saddle: A Haitian Mini-AARThunderHawk3https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/back-in-the-saddle-a-haitian-mini-aar.1555511/
1The Cairo News - An Egypt to Arabia V3 AARwitchveilhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-cairo-news-an-egypt-to-arabia-v3-aar.1562923/

The old warhorse HoI4 was won by @Le Jones , followed by @stnylan on second and @TheButterflyComposer on third place:

Hearts of Iron IV
VotesNameAuthorLink
6A Royal Prerogative - A UK AARLe Joneshttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/a-royal-prerogative-a-uk-aar.1365990/
5The Thorn of the Rosestnylanhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-thorn-of-the-rose.1385418/
4Tomorrow Belongs To Me - A 'Democratic' Germany AARTheButterflyComposerhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...longs-to-me-a-democratic-germany-aar.1542366/
3Poles Apart – an HOI4 AhistoryBullfilterhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/poles-apart-an-hoi4-ahistory.1532542/
1The Permanent Revolution Lives On! - Trotskyist AARThaHowardhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...t-revolution-lives-on-trotskyist-aar.1496312/
1The Eastern Vikings, Part 4 - Baltic MegacampaignRedTemplarhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-eastern-vikings-part-4-baltic-megacampaign.1448579/

Sterllaris was won by @Von Acturus , followd by @Chilango2 and @Nax24 :

Stellaris
VotesNameAuthorLink
7Shattered Glass: A Narrative Stellaris AARVon Acturushttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/shattered-glass-a-narrative-stellaris-aar.1509298/
6Songs of the Saiiban- A Poetic AARChilango2https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/songs-of-the-saiiban-a-poetic-aar.1393906/
4A Galaxy of WonderNax24https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/a-galaxy-of-wonder.1528002/
3The Last HeroesMacavity116https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-last-heroes.1504056/
2Stellaris Wars: A Nemesis Ironman Saga II - Rebellion: The Imperium at WarArithmeticianhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...aga-ii-rebellion-the-imperium-at-war.1523395/
1The Greater Goodjasondroth24https://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-greater-good.1560197/
1The Zenak Unity - Our awakeningdanivonhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/the-zenak-unity-our-awakening.1559829/
1Die Wacht Im Raum - A Kaiserreich Stellaris AARSidehttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/threads/die-wacht-im-raum-a-kaiserreich-stellaris-aar.1499805/
1Onward, Toward Perfection (Anthology of the Enclave of Eternity) WIPQuinzalhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...ology-of-the-enclave-of-eternity-wip.1498433/
1Rise and fall of the Imperium of Nova Terra, a story of war, triumph, decadence and collapse - a Stellaris AARFalhxerhttps://forum.paradoxplaza.com/foru...cadence-and-collapse-a-stellaris-aar.1555118/

Last, but not least, the Other category was won by shared first place @Wraith11B and @roverS3 , followed by shared second place by @Bullfilter and @El Pip . Third place went to @Uriah and @HistoryDude :


And that was all, folks! Thanks for voting!
 
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Thanks to all who voted for In the Shadows of the Ancients!

I remember how excited I was the first time I picked up an ACA way back in 2010. Its great to have such a long running way of recognising our favourite AARs here.

@Nikolai Only just seeing your earlier posts today, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with disability. We all really appreciate the effort you put in running these awards for the AAR community, and indeed showing up in so many people's stories to read and comment as well!
 
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Thanks @Nikolai for pushing through life’s challenges to see this through! Hope things can improve for you and you know you always have our appreciation, support and understanding.

Congratulations to all winners and nominees and many thanks to those who voted for my various works.
 
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Great to see the results and thank you @Nikolai for both hosting and presenting them despite your ongoing troubles. A true fan and you keep us cool! :)

Many congrats to all of those listed and especially those that pulled out a victory. And indeed thank you to those that suggested my work and most definitely all of those that took part in the voting. Projects like this don't work without participation. Thank you all very much for doing so!
 
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Thanks to all who voted for In the Shadows of the Ancients!

I remember how excited I was the first time I picked up an ACA way back in 2010. Its great to have such a long running way of recognising our favourite AARs here.

@Nikolai Only just seeing your earlier posts today, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with disability. We all really appreciate the effort you put in running these awards for the AAR community, and indeed showing up in so many people's stories to read and comment as well!
Thanks mate. It's been hard, but writing and commenting gives me much energy in a weird way. Have had to cut down on reading/commenting compared to my high point though. Just don't have it in me right now.
Thanks @Nikolai for pushing through life’s challenges to see this through! Hope things can improve for you and you know you always have our appreciation, support and understanding.

Congratulations to all winners and nominees and many thanks to those who voted for my various works.
I appriciate that! Thank you. :) I got some promising feedback from the ones in charge of my case with getting disability or not. Got a note supporting me to a large degree and had a meeting when the woman said I had a very solid case. :)
Great to see the results and thank you @Nikolai for both hosting and presenting them despite your ongoing troubles. A true fan and you keep us cool! :)

Many congrats to all of those listed and especially those that pulled out a victory. And indeed thank you to those that suggested my work and most definitely all of those that took part in the voting. Projects like this don't work without participation. Thank you all very much for doing so!
*bows*
It is an honor to do this. Even when I have to wait a bit longer than I wish to finish the tally and presentation.
Thank you @Nikolai for organising this thread and for all you do in AARland, writing, commenting, organising. That you manage to do all this while facing such challenges in your personal life is nothing short of impressive!!

And thanks to all readers and voters on Shattered Glass!
Thanks mate! It does cost, but it also is very rewarding. :)
 
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Thank you to @Nikolai for soldiering on. My thoughts and prayers are with you, always. Thank you to everyone who voted. Thank you to everyone who has participated in making Avon a success. As always, the readers are the greatest winners with all of the excellent to entertain them.
 
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Thank you to @Nikolai for soldiering on. My thoughts and prayers are with you, always. Thank you to everyone who voted. Thank you to everyone who has participated in making Avon a success. As always, the readers are the greatest winners with all of the excellent to entertain them.
Thanks man! :)
 
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