So thanks for all the needless harshness, various posters. As various people rightly conjectured, I was playing as a small duchy and got a lucky full duchy claim on my (smaller) neighbor. The war was long over and I was trying to decide whether I should invest in my economy more with my spare money or save it for paying the loan back. Since keeping 300 gold around for what could have been 3 years for all i knew would have been a massive waste, I ended up spending it only for the loan to fall due the next month. This engendered my rather frustrated post. Glad to hear plenty of other peoples rants about how I'm not playing a single player game right though.