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Hmm, I wonder....
Well, in this instalment, I went for Enlgand instead. Wabba!
----------------------
The New Year. A time for celebration, getting ripped, and then waking up with a strange woman in the morning. Ah! Good times! Good times.
This New Year, 1539 PT, sees me in control of most of Europe. Only Spain remains a real threat to me, and I hope to rectify that soon enough. I plan to strike at Spain, use my allies to the best of their abilities. As such, I must prepare the armies along the French Border so that they can move in when I make such a bold move. So! Let us get this party started, as they say!
1539 PT
So! In anticipation of a major strike against Spain, I must prepare. If there is one thing that worries me, it is the fact that the Spanish Islands, like Malta, Corsica and the like, will be impossible to reach. This will take me many wars to engulf them in the Papal colours. Pity.
Robes! Robes in Dauphine, Auvergne, Franche Comte, Lorraine and Lyonnais. They are the closest to any Spanish holdings, so they will be prepared. In fact, in Dauphine and Auvergne, I order the forts improved. Take them to the next level.[Level 2 for each]
More Robes. Must have more Robes! Yes! In Holstein, Mecklenberg, Vorpommern and Hinterpommern, Poznan, Wielkopolska, Silesia, Moravia, Ostmarch, Erz and Sudeten. I now have each of my borders secured.
Finally, I call up Robes in Yorkshire and Midlands. Who knows? Maybe I can hit England when they least expect it, walk over them? Ha!
You know, I am wondering if a strike against England is a better idea first? Take them out for their blasphemy. Not against the Pope. Nope. Against me! Can you imagine the audacity. I must assume they do not realize they are already under my dominion, and simply fail to realize it yet. I will fix that. Very soon.
On February 2nd, the Great Move begins. I start by ordering armies in the Home Provinces to head for French Provinces. The Army in the Capital heads for Guyenne, to strike at the lone Guyenne Province(confused yet?), Gascogne. I then order the remainder of the Home Armies, in Marche, Siena and Lombardia to head for the French Capital, and from there, I can hit at all of England’s continental possessions. I also decide that I will ferry over some troops to Yorkshire and Midlands, simply because if I do not, I lose those two provinces in any war with England. I figure by the beginning of next year, I will be fully prepared, perhaps even earlier.
The rest of the year is spent in preparation. I feel it in my bones. Something massive is about to begin. I only wonder what it is? War perhaps? I can only hope! Yes!
1540 PT
Well, in accordance with my “Cunning Plan™” I decide that Robes will be called up in Zeeland, Holland, Geldre, Oldenburg, Bremen, Holstein, Mecklenberg, Vorpommern and Hinterpommern. I will be ready. I am ordering the army in Holland over to Yorkshire. For, when I am at war with England, using a fleet will be out of the question. I heard rumours they have a 53 strong ship fleet in Anglia. Damn! That’s four times as many ships as I have, and that is only one of their fleets. Who knows how many more they have?
On January 15th, a gift is given to the Pope, which I appropriate for myself. I have enough to send off a missionary, and then give a fancy letter to both my allies. This gift also gives me just enough to upgrade the fort in Auvergne.[Level 3 ordered]
You may ask, how can I afford all of these things? Simple. I have a veritable crapload of money coming in from the census taxes.[I have a screenie for it! Yay!]
So! Now I am ready to strike. I think. I will wait until April 1st, a perfect day to start a war, eh?
On February 8th, a Papal Bull is passed before my eyes, and I sign it before I even have a chance to read it. Later on, I find out I just instituted the Jesuit Order. Ah Crap! They are so narrow-minded that I will be screwed because of it. Well! That is just great!!
So! That was an absolute waste of my time![ Note: The even gives you –2 to innovativeness, 4 missionaries and 4 colonists, but if you are like me, and have 6 colonists and 5 missionaries, well, it really does not help out, does it? Argh!]
Well, I decide to declare war directly on England. Mainly because Guyenne is still Catholic, and England is not. On April 1st, at 8:43 AM, the message is delivered to the English Consul in London, and then the war is begun with my troops in Gascogne moving to siege Poitou, the Army in the French Capital heads for Normandie, heading through Caux. The Army in Champagne heads for Caux, and the army in Artois heads for Calais. Geldre and Holland see troop movements, as the Armies there head for Friesen.
In England Proper, I have the army in the Midlands head for Lancashire, and the army in Yorkshire, which, with the reinforcements ferried over, has 35,000 men, is spilt in two, with one army heading for Lincoln and one for the English capital. There is one possible problem, as England has a province that is separated from the rest of it by Scotland. That province, what is its name? The Highlands? Damn! Well, I will have to hope for a hell of a lot of luck.
So! The Great Move has begun! This is an historic move. If it succeeds, then the only major power in the West will be Spain. If it fails, well, the vultures will strike me down where I sit.
The first English province to fall is Poitou, mainly due to French aid. I am relying on that for the continental English possessions. There are French troops in every English possession on the Continent, save for up in Friesen. They are adding 3 times what I put in troop wise, but I have control of each assault or siege. Excellent.
The provinces fall with surprising ease, at least the Continental ones. In one instance, the French have 65,000 men in Normandie, and I have 10,000 Robes. Yet since I was there first, when I order the assault which sees about 1/3 of the French force die, and I get the province, well, I can only laugh. Turn about is fair play.
On August 2nd, both Lincoln and Anglia fall on the third consecutive assaults. I have a huge map opened to me…
OH CRAP!
Yep, those are cities across the ocean in Stadecona and in Belle Isle. Oh crap! And why does China have a trading post in the Caribbean? That makes absolutely no sense at all. Oh well.
1541 PT
The English, poor sods, send out fresh recruits against the hardened French and Papal Forces, and are eliminated. I am surprised when I get aid from France in the southern English provinces. In Wessex, Cornwall and Kent, I am getting help from French forces. But since they are silly, and help me with my sieges and assaults, they get nothing. Pity. I really want to reward them for their faithful service. I’ll have to think of something.
The year sees each English province fall, and in a very strange twist of Fate, Venice captures the Highlands. I hope that they ask for it.
By the end of 1541, in a mere 2 years, I have, using almost exclusively French troops with a smattering of my own, taken over all the English provinces. I wish there was something I could give the French for sacrificing about 300,000 men, roughly, to help me capture England. Maybe I’ll send them a fruit cake. That will show my appreciation.
1542 PT
Well, I know I said I could not strike at the English Colonies, but I want to. It would open up so much for me! So! I take my 13 transport fleet and order a 7,000 Robe strong army to load on, and head for the New World. I doubt they’ll make it, but hey! I have to try, don’t I?
I give State Gifts to both France and Venice. I want to end this war, as revolts are really starting to get to be a pain.
On June 28th, I am forced to decide how I want to organize the Holy Inquisition. I go for the Spanish way. That is the best, eh? Wait! Who said that?! Don’t play games with me! Our weapons are fear, surprise, a ruthless, fanatical devotion to the Pope and the ability to eat our weight in Cheese! Yes!
I mean, if they can eat their own weight in Cheese then how can I not choose them?
Sure, they purge huge swaths of the population in the Italian peninsula, but that’s ok. They were unhappy anyways. Yeah! Unhappy!
1543 PT
England wants to give me all of their colonies and trading posts. I don’t care about those. Give me some of your precious home provinces! Do it! Damn!
On June 20th, a new movement sweeps through Europe. Led by a man calling himself Jean Calvin…That is not my Jean Calvine? Is it? Oh well.
October 18th sees me finally ask for the right things from those damned English. I ask for Friesen, Munster, Wessex, Bristol and Belle Isle. Oh Crap! That so sucks!
Mark my words, I will attack the English in five years, and make them pay for refusing me. The bastards! I hate them so much!
1544 PT
My new possessions need defending, so in Bristol and Belle Isle, I order the upgrade for the forts there. In Belle Isle, there are no forts, so that needs to be fixed. [Level 1 for Belle Isle, Level 3 for Bristol]
I also call up Robes in the new provinces. I have to. They have to be defended. I check the diplomatic notes, and see that China has attacked the Aztecs? With Delhi helping? Wow! Strange indeed!
1545 PT
So! This year sees me order the forts in Moldova, Wielkopolska and Memel upgraded. [All to Level 2]
I call up Robes in a few provinces, as I already have a massive army that should suffice for any problems that may come my way. In the unmentionable province, Banat, Maros, Moldova, Galizien, and Carpathia men are notified that they will be fighting in the Papal Robes. Yeah!
April 21st sees some of the old Roman cities, as they have begun to call themselves, demand their old rights. From the time of Caesar! I do not think so, damn fool idiots!
May 10th sees the shit hit the fan and splatter all over Europe. The Council of Trent occurs, and now I am screwed. Not only does my grasp on the order in the realm loosen, I now have the possibility of revolts for 216 months. That is a very long time!
November 1st sees Bavaria struggle to regain its freedom. Although France initially dishonours the alliance, I ask them back in, and they agree. I cannot lose them, not now. Especially since I plan to hit England again very soon.
I had troops in Bayern already, to help quell a revolt there. I guess I did a bad job. No matter, I have the troops there to start a siege already.
1546 PT
Revolts are rampant in the realm, but my Robes manage to put them down with relative ease. I have Bayern under siege, and will have it within 2 to three years, if I am lucky.
August 1st sees news that the Army has improved. I have not seen Jean Calvine for quite a while. It makes me more suspicious of him. I will have to watch him carefully. [Land Tech 17 reached]
The year is spent suppressing Revolts, and laying siege to Bayern. Fun!
1547 PT
Well, again I do nothing but put down revolts and siege Bayern. My patience pays off, as I capture Bayern on March 27th and two days later, on the 29th, they are no more. They are now under my control, though. Venice let them slip through. Too bad.
On July 5th, one of the nobles is killed. The other nobles are afraid, and that just sucks! Damn!
1548 PT
Well, I use the funds this year to order forts in Belle Isle upgraded. Why not? [Level 2]
I give both France and Venice State Gifts to show them that I really do appreciate them being in my alliance.
Nothing else of import happens this year.
1549 PT
Time for my DPC. Since all of those religious hits have made the realm the most narrow-minded group of asses on the planet, I will change that. Starting this year. [+1 to innovativeness DP. Yay! Only 9 more to get it maxed out! Huzzah! ]
I wonder how William and those bumbling fools are doing in their search for the Comfy Chair, or whatever it is they are searching for now?
The pile of books was almost as high as William was when he stood, which was seldom. He had found a very strange book that had actually given a detailed description of what the “Void” was. It was in a book written by a Muslim scholar, named Ay yi ye. He had spent his life in the Library of Alexandria, in the 8th century. Although it was hard to understand what many things meant, William was making fairly good progress…
…The “Void” was an ancient idea, brought forward by the heretic Glaucoma, who lived in the holy city of Mecca. It was he who first espoused the idea that the “Void” was actually a person and not a place. He suggested that the “Void” was an area outside of the Universe as we know it. It existed outside of Heaven, Hell, or any other place we could come up with. The “Void” had existed at the beginning of creation, and had fought a mighty battle against the other gods. After a thousand thousand years, the “Void” was defeated and sent to a place that bore its name as well. So, it seems the heretic was suggesting that the “Void” was both a place and a person, entity, being. I must say, although much of what the heretic speaks of makes little sense, this idea, that the “Void” is actually both a place and a person explains much. For example, the reports of “Followers” suggest that the “Void” must have some representation in human form, else how could they ‘follow’ it? My own research tends to agree with what the heretic suggests. Specifically that these “Followers” and the so-called “Dark One” have some intrinsic connection. Could it be that the “Void” and the “Dark One” are one in the same?
As well, the heretic Glaucoma spoke of a Comfy Chair™, which leads me to wonder if that is the same chair that is spoken of in accounts of the god Tanaris? Although I find it highly unlikely. For the accounts of the chair of Tanaris show that the “Comfy Chair™” is in fact not the same. The most obvious reason is the way in which the chair is referred to. It does not have capitalization for the words. The chair of Tanaris is called the “comfy chair™” and not the “Comfy Chair™”. This is absolute proof that the two chairs are different.
An interesting bit of information. It seems that stories concerning the battle at the beginning of all also include references to an inquisition and the “Comfy Chair™”. It seems the Comfy Chair™ was actually a throne. Whose throne, it is not clear. But surely this is of great importance?…
William gasped. Here then was absolute proof! He would have to send a message back to Bob Cajun. Here was perhaps the biggest break ever. He…What was that noise? There! There it was again!
“D-U-M-B
A-S-S!
That’s what he is!
D-U-M-B
A-S-S!
That is what he is!
Just a big one,
Just a big one!
Just a big one,
Just a big one!
Ain’t gonna tell you other,
It’s the truth,
Ain’t gonna call your mother,
Whose name is Ruth!
All I saying, listen to me
He’s a dumbass!
A big one!
Just a big one!
Yes a big one!
A huge one!
D-U-M-B
A-S-S!
D-U-M-B
A-S-S!”
William saw both Mario and Luigi swinging back and forth, rocking to the music. William sighed, even as Mario almost fell over due to the gravitational pull of his lard. He let them sing. They had been working very hard for so long, they deserved a break. He sat back, let them sing away.
Well, in this instalment, I went for Enlgand instead. Wabba!
----------------------
The New Year. A time for celebration, getting ripped, and then waking up with a strange woman in the morning. Ah! Good times! Good times.
This New Year, 1539 PT, sees me in control of most of Europe. Only Spain remains a real threat to me, and I hope to rectify that soon enough. I plan to strike at Spain, use my allies to the best of their abilities. As such, I must prepare the armies along the French Border so that they can move in when I make such a bold move. So! Let us get this party started, as they say!
1539 PT
So! In anticipation of a major strike against Spain, I must prepare. If there is one thing that worries me, it is the fact that the Spanish Islands, like Malta, Corsica and the like, will be impossible to reach. This will take me many wars to engulf them in the Papal colours. Pity.
Robes! Robes in Dauphine, Auvergne, Franche Comte, Lorraine and Lyonnais. They are the closest to any Spanish holdings, so they will be prepared. In fact, in Dauphine and Auvergne, I order the forts improved. Take them to the next level.[Level 2 for each]
More Robes. Must have more Robes! Yes! In Holstein, Mecklenberg, Vorpommern and Hinterpommern, Poznan, Wielkopolska, Silesia, Moravia, Ostmarch, Erz and Sudeten. I now have each of my borders secured.
Finally, I call up Robes in Yorkshire and Midlands. Who knows? Maybe I can hit England when they least expect it, walk over them? Ha!
You know, I am wondering if a strike against England is a better idea first? Take them out for their blasphemy. Not against the Pope. Nope. Against me! Can you imagine the audacity. I must assume they do not realize they are already under my dominion, and simply fail to realize it yet. I will fix that. Very soon.
On February 2nd, the Great Move begins. I start by ordering armies in the Home Provinces to head for French Provinces. The Army in the Capital heads for Guyenne, to strike at the lone Guyenne Province(confused yet?), Gascogne. I then order the remainder of the Home Armies, in Marche, Siena and Lombardia to head for the French Capital, and from there, I can hit at all of England’s continental possessions. I also decide that I will ferry over some troops to Yorkshire and Midlands, simply because if I do not, I lose those two provinces in any war with England. I figure by the beginning of next year, I will be fully prepared, perhaps even earlier.
The rest of the year is spent in preparation. I feel it in my bones. Something massive is about to begin. I only wonder what it is? War perhaps? I can only hope! Yes!
1540 PT
Well, in accordance with my “Cunning Plan™” I decide that Robes will be called up in Zeeland, Holland, Geldre, Oldenburg, Bremen, Holstein, Mecklenberg, Vorpommern and Hinterpommern. I will be ready. I am ordering the army in Holland over to Yorkshire. For, when I am at war with England, using a fleet will be out of the question. I heard rumours they have a 53 strong ship fleet in Anglia. Damn! That’s four times as many ships as I have, and that is only one of their fleets. Who knows how many more they have?
On January 15th, a gift is given to the Pope, which I appropriate for myself. I have enough to send off a missionary, and then give a fancy letter to both my allies. This gift also gives me just enough to upgrade the fort in Auvergne.[Level 3 ordered]
You may ask, how can I afford all of these things? Simple. I have a veritable crapload of money coming in from the census taxes.[I have a screenie for it! Yay!]
So! Now I am ready to strike. I think. I will wait until April 1st, a perfect day to start a war, eh?
On February 8th, a Papal Bull is passed before my eyes, and I sign it before I even have a chance to read it. Later on, I find out I just instituted the Jesuit Order. Ah Crap! They are so narrow-minded that I will be screwed because of it. Well! That is just great!!
So! That was an absolute waste of my time![ Note: The even gives you –2 to innovativeness, 4 missionaries and 4 colonists, but if you are like me, and have 6 colonists and 5 missionaries, well, it really does not help out, does it? Argh!]
Well, I decide to declare war directly on England. Mainly because Guyenne is still Catholic, and England is not. On April 1st, at 8:43 AM, the message is delivered to the English Consul in London, and then the war is begun with my troops in Gascogne moving to siege Poitou, the Army in the French Capital heads for Normandie, heading through Caux. The Army in Champagne heads for Caux, and the army in Artois heads for Calais. Geldre and Holland see troop movements, as the Armies there head for Friesen.
In England Proper, I have the army in the Midlands head for Lancashire, and the army in Yorkshire, which, with the reinforcements ferried over, has 35,000 men, is spilt in two, with one army heading for Lincoln and one for the English capital. There is one possible problem, as England has a province that is separated from the rest of it by Scotland. That province, what is its name? The Highlands? Damn! Well, I will have to hope for a hell of a lot of luck.
So! The Great Move has begun! This is an historic move. If it succeeds, then the only major power in the West will be Spain. If it fails, well, the vultures will strike me down where I sit.
The first English province to fall is Poitou, mainly due to French aid. I am relying on that for the continental English possessions. There are French troops in every English possession on the Continent, save for up in Friesen. They are adding 3 times what I put in troop wise, but I have control of each assault or siege. Excellent.
The provinces fall with surprising ease, at least the Continental ones. In one instance, the French have 65,000 men in Normandie, and I have 10,000 Robes. Yet since I was there first, when I order the assault which sees about 1/3 of the French force die, and I get the province, well, I can only laugh. Turn about is fair play.
On August 2nd, both Lincoln and Anglia fall on the third consecutive assaults. I have a huge map opened to me…
OH CRAP!
Yep, those are cities across the ocean in Stadecona and in Belle Isle. Oh crap! And why does China have a trading post in the Caribbean? That makes absolutely no sense at all. Oh well.
1541 PT
The English, poor sods, send out fresh recruits against the hardened French and Papal Forces, and are eliminated. I am surprised when I get aid from France in the southern English provinces. In Wessex, Cornwall and Kent, I am getting help from French forces. But since they are silly, and help me with my sieges and assaults, they get nothing. Pity. I really want to reward them for their faithful service. I’ll have to think of something.
The year sees each English province fall, and in a very strange twist of Fate, Venice captures the Highlands. I hope that they ask for it.
By the end of 1541, in a mere 2 years, I have, using almost exclusively French troops with a smattering of my own, taken over all the English provinces. I wish there was something I could give the French for sacrificing about 300,000 men, roughly, to help me capture England. Maybe I’ll send them a fruit cake. That will show my appreciation.
1542 PT
Well, I know I said I could not strike at the English Colonies, but I want to. It would open up so much for me! So! I take my 13 transport fleet and order a 7,000 Robe strong army to load on, and head for the New World. I doubt they’ll make it, but hey! I have to try, don’t I?
I give State Gifts to both France and Venice. I want to end this war, as revolts are really starting to get to be a pain.
On June 28th, I am forced to decide how I want to organize the Holy Inquisition. I go for the Spanish way. That is the best, eh? Wait! Who said that?! Don’t play games with me! Our weapons are fear, surprise, a ruthless, fanatical devotion to the Pope and the ability to eat our weight in Cheese! Yes!
I mean, if they can eat their own weight in Cheese then how can I not choose them?
Sure, they purge huge swaths of the population in the Italian peninsula, but that’s ok. They were unhappy anyways. Yeah! Unhappy!
1543 PT
England wants to give me all of their colonies and trading posts. I don’t care about those. Give me some of your precious home provinces! Do it! Damn!
On June 20th, a new movement sweeps through Europe. Led by a man calling himself Jean Calvin…That is not my Jean Calvine? Is it? Oh well.
October 18th sees me finally ask for the right things from those damned English. I ask for Friesen, Munster, Wessex, Bristol and Belle Isle. Oh Crap! That so sucks!
Mark my words, I will attack the English in five years, and make them pay for refusing me. The bastards! I hate them so much!
1544 PT
My new possessions need defending, so in Bristol and Belle Isle, I order the upgrade for the forts there. In Belle Isle, there are no forts, so that needs to be fixed. [Level 1 for Belle Isle, Level 3 for Bristol]
I also call up Robes in the new provinces. I have to. They have to be defended. I check the diplomatic notes, and see that China has attacked the Aztecs? With Delhi helping? Wow! Strange indeed!
1545 PT
So! This year sees me order the forts in Moldova, Wielkopolska and Memel upgraded. [All to Level 2]
I call up Robes in a few provinces, as I already have a massive army that should suffice for any problems that may come my way. In the unmentionable province, Banat, Maros, Moldova, Galizien, and Carpathia men are notified that they will be fighting in the Papal Robes. Yeah!
April 21st sees some of the old Roman cities, as they have begun to call themselves, demand their old rights. From the time of Caesar! I do not think so, damn fool idiots!
May 10th sees the shit hit the fan and splatter all over Europe. The Council of Trent occurs, and now I am screwed. Not only does my grasp on the order in the realm loosen, I now have the possibility of revolts for 216 months. That is a very long time!
November 1st sees Bavaria struggle to regain its freedom. Although France initially dishonours the alliance, I ask them back in, and they agree. I cannot lose them, not now. Especially since I plan to hit England again very soon.
I had troops in Bayern already, to help quell a revolt there. I guess I did a bad job. No matter, I have the troops there to start a siege already.
1546 PT
Revolts are rampant in the realm, but my Robes manage to put them down with relative ease. I have Bayern under siege, and will have it within 2 to three years, if I am lucky.
August 1st sees news that the Army has improved. I have not seen Jean Calvine for quite a while. It makes me more suspicious of him. I will have to watch him carefully. [Land Tech 17 reached]
The year is spent suppressing Revolts, and laying siege to Bayern. Fun!
1547 PT
Well, again I do nothing but put down revolts and siege Bayern. My patience pays off, as I capture Bayern on March 27th and two days later, on the 29th, they are no more. They are now under my control, though. Venice let them slip through. Too bad.
On July 5th, one of the nobles is killed. The other nobles are afraid, and that just sucks! Damn!
1548 PT
Well, I use the funds this year to order forts in Belle Isle upgraded. Why not? [Level 2]
I give both France and Venice State Gifts to show them that I really do appreciate them being in my alliance.
Nothing else of import happens this year.
1549 PT
Time for my DPC. Since all of those religious hits have made the realm the most narrow-minded group of asses on the planet, I will change that. Starting this year. [+1 to innovativeness DP. Yay! Only 9 more to get it maxed out! Huzzah! ]
I wonder how William and those bumbling fools are doing in their search for the Comfy Chair, or whatever it is they are searching for now?
The pile of books was almost as high as William was when he stood, which was seldom. He had found a very strange book that had actually given a detailed description of what the “Void” was. It was in a book written by a Muslim scholar, named Ay yi ye. He had spent his life in the Library of Alexandria, in the 8th century. Although it was hard to understand what many things meant, William was making fairly good progress…
…The “Void” was an ancient idea, brought forward by the heretic Glaucoma, who lived in the holy city of Mecca. It was he who first espoused the idea that the “Void” was actually a person and not a place. He suggested that the “Void” was an area outside of the Universe as we know it. It existed outside of Heaven, Hell, or any other place we could come up with. The “Void” had existed at the beginning of creation, and had fought a mighty battle against the other gods. After a thousand thousand years, the “Void” was defeated and sent to a place that bore its name as well. So, it seems the heretic was suggesting that the “Void” was both a place and a person, entity, being. I must say, although much of what the heretic speaks of makes little sense, this idea, that the “Void” is actually both a place and a person explains much. For example, the reports of “Followers” suggest that the “Void” must have some representation in human form, else how could they ‘follow’ it? My own research tends to agree with what the heretic suggests. Specifically that these “Followers” and the so-called “Dark One” have some intrinsic connection. Could it be that the “Void” and the “Dark One” are one in the same?
As well, the heretic Glaucoma spoke of a Comfy Chair™, which leads me to wonder if that is the same chair that is spoken of in accounts of the god Tanaris? Although I find it highly unlikely. For the accounts of the chair of Tanaris show that the “Comfy Chair™” is in fact not the same. The most obvious reason is the way in which the chair is referred to. It does not have capitalization for the words. The chair of Tanaris is called the “comfy chair™” and not the “Comfy Chair™”. This is absolute proof that the two chairs are different.
An interesting bit of information. It seems that stories concerning the battle at the beginning of all also include references to an inquisition and the “Comfy Chair™”. It seems the Comfy Chair™ was actually a throne. Whose throne, it is not clear. But surely this is of great importance?…
William gasped. Here then was absolute proof! He would have to send a message back to Bob Cajun. Here was perhaps the biggest break ever. He…What was that noise? There! There it was again!
“D-U-M-B
A-S-S!
That’s what he is!
D-U-M-B
A-S-S!
That is what he is!
Just a big one,
Just a big one!
Just a big one,
Just a big one!
Ain’t gonna tell you other,
It’s the truth,
Ain’t gonna call your mother,
Whose name is Ruth!
All I saying, listen to me
He’s a dumbass!
A big one!
Just a big one!
Yes a big one!
A huge one!
D-U-M-B
A-S-S!
D-U-M-B
A-S-S!”
William saw both Mario and Luigi swinging back and forth, rocking to the music. William sighed, even as Mario almost fell over due to the gravitational pull of his lard. He let them sing. They had been working very hard for so long, they deserved a break. He sat back, let them sing away.
Great Update H_S... if you want to email me those screenies you are talking about, I can post them for ya 
this is off topic... but it seems the best place to ask. How do you get the trademark symbol? I would assume its some combination of alt and numbers... little help?
Well, since I use Microsoft word to write my posts, all I have to do is (TM) and it will automatically give the trademark symbol. As you can see, this forum does not allow for that to happen .
.
alright... I use Microsoft word too, so if i insert it in there, it will transfer to the post? no problem then.
I'll not tell...yet.
Hmm, well, I guess you will all have to wait for more More!
Another thing. I am planning a sort of "Musical Interlude" soon. Now, I need your help. If you have a song you want to see a parody of, then let me know. Limit it to 2 per person, and I will do what I can. I'll just say this: Monks make for excellent back up singers.
So! If there a particular song that you have always wanted to see made light of, let me know. I would only ask that it not be rap. Country, anything else is fine. As soon as I have enough, I'll set up the interlude.
The next instalment will be coming soon. I promise that more will be revealed about the Comfy Chair™.
Hmm, well, I guess you will all have to wait for more
More!Another thing. I am planning a sort of "Musical Interlude" soon. Now, I need your help. If you have a song you want to see a parody of, then let me know. Limit it to 2 per person, and I will do what I can. I'll just say this: Monks make for excellent back up singers.
So! If there a particular song that you have always wanted to see made light of, let me know. I would only ask that it not be rap. Country, anything else is fine. As soon as I have enough, I'll set up the interlude.
The next instalment will be coming soon. I promise that more will be revealed about the Comfy Chair™.
Re: Hmm, I wonder....
Damn foiled again. Such a simple mistake. All is not lost for I have a fall back plan.
Joe
Damn foiled again. Such a simple mistake.
All is not lost for I have a fall back plan. Joe
I don't think so. You see, I already have a history for the Comfy Chair™. It will be made far more clear in my next instalment, which will happen tomorrow. I doubt even Tanaris will be able to match my in-depth crap...I mean history for the Comfy Chair. Stay tuned
Stay tuned
Originally posted by Honour_Shogun
I don't think so. You see, I already have a history for the Comfy Chair™. It will be made far more clear in my next instalment, which will happen tomorrow. I doubt even Tanaris will be able to match my in-depth crap...I mean history for the Comfy Chair.
In that case I’ll have to use my backup to my fall back plan.
By the way what color is the Comfy Chair™? Inquiring minds want to know.Joe
I think its a red-leather color... not one of those bright read...
but i would guess black... something evil
but i would guess black... something evil
Wowsah and Voidsah
You've been chewing up Europe at a truely frightening rate, I'm scared now!
Void... I wrote a little something on the origin of Void some years ago, if you want to I can post it
You've been chewing up Europe at a truely frightening rate, I'm scared now!
Void... I wrote a little something on the origin of Void some years ago, if you want to I can post it
Check your PM, H_S, I've cast my vote.
And it must be red, it wouldn't do if you saw any bloodstains on it...
And it must be red, it wouldn't do if you saw any bloodstains on it...
Sorcerer brings up a good point about the chair being red to cover up the blood stains. I kind of envisioned it being a deep green color. Don't ask my why, it just seemed right.
Joe
I kind of envisioned it being a deep green color. Don't ask my why, it just seemed right. Joe
Ha! Red?! All wrong! It is polka dot and plaid! It scares people with its awful fashion sense! Ha!
Seriously, I just have to finish the end of my instalment, which will switch perspectives from William all the way across the sea to Pesaro, in Delaware. I have a very extensive,i guess, explanation, or point of view regarding the Comfy Chair.
Mimir, if you want to post something on the Void, feel free to do so. It may or may not be incorporated into the continuing story.
Oh, and Storey, reading your "gods did play" thread has forced me to consider another 'letter' post. Maybe not 'e' this time. Maybe 'o'. I'll have to see
Seriously, I just have to finish the end of my instalment, which will switch perspectives from William all the way across the sea to Pesaro, in Delaware. I have a very extensive,i guess, explanation, or point of view regarding the Comfy Chair.
Mimir, if you want to post something on the Void, feel free to do so. It may or may not be incorporated into the continuing story.
Oh, and Storey, reading your "gods did play" thread has forced me to consider another 'letter' post. Maybe not 'e' this time. Maybe 'o'. I'll have to see