New Player - Off to a good start but some questions

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So I am one of the many that jumped on the Steam sale this week and I am well underway on my first play through. I started with Dublin and I have managed to expand to hold 2 Duke titles and working to obtain my goal as King of Ireland. I think I am doing pretty well but I do have some questions and observations:

• I literally laughed out loud when my controlled character died from an intense 'intimate' session with his wife. However he had been wildly successful before that fateful night and had about 8 kids before kicking the bucket. I had it set up so my oldest son inherited everything which created a lot of pissed off and treacherous siblings for my new heir. Is there a good way to deal with siblings? I gave one a landed title but all that did was give him a bigger army to rebel against me with.
  
  
• My brother actually succeeded in overthrowing me which I thought would be game over but it was actually a blessing in disguise since I got to play as the more competent brother. Is it actually a decent idea to let a more capable ruler that is of your dynasty overthrow you?
  
  
• Rebellions, intrigue, and plots are what I understand the least of the game. I read that sending the spymaster to the area the rebellion is originating might help, but they seem to declare war on me quickly after I discover them. I guess I could try to butter them up more. On the current ruler I discovered his sister is plotting to kill him but there doesn't seem to be anything I can do about it. Apparently I can imprison her without royally pissing off everyone and I obviously can't talk her out of it. Is my only option to try and kill her first?
  
  
• I'm not sure how to marry my children that are not likely to become heirs as well as nieces and nephews of my dynasty. Daughters I have been trying to send far away to distant kings for the prestige and hopefully far enough away that they won't try to claim my land. The males I have a tougher time with. Normally I try to get them to marry a wife with great attributes so I can have her guardian the possible heirs into something good. I'm trying to prevent any sort of marriage where a grandchild not of my dynasty gets a claim on my land and intends to use it.
  
  
• Lastly, what are the criteria on being eligible to be a council member? Is there an age limit or something? I've had some talented daughters come of age but I am unable to appoint them. However my sons are immediately available.

Been having a ton of fun with the game so far, love any tips you folk can provide!

 

[FromasterG]

1. You can try to marry your siblings to other courts. This will get them out of your hair and possibly make new allies. Beware that their spouse/offspring might press their claim, though. Additionally you can bury the sibling under a different vassal. Make a barony for your brother and transfer your brother to a count, and you won't have to deal with him. Your vassals can still make factions to put him on the throne. Try to make sure your vassals like you.

2. I think you got lucky. Since he had a claim on all of your titles, he completely de-landed you. Sometimes you will only lose your primary title and be stuck with a duchy/county under your new liege. I find it a lot easier to make your heir the most competent ruler than allow another child to be better. It also helps with revolts if your vassals like your heir/character more than the competition. Make sure to educate your heir personally, or at least give him to a competent vassal, so that you can ensure that he has a lot of beneficial traits.

3. Again, try to have rulers with good traits and diplomacy so that your vassals won't be as likely to bother you. Don't be afraid to give "gifts" and honorary titles to particularly frisky vassals to try to pacify them. If you have a vassal that is plotting against you, and you can't make them stop (after using a bribe, perhaps) you can always try to imprison them. If you succeed, you don't have to worry about them, and you could even ransom them. Be warned that if you fail to imprison a landed vassal, he or she will revolt against you. Unlanded vassals will run to a foreign court and hate you more. About factions, I think that certain factions only fire when they reach a certain % of your forces. Independence factions fire at around 30% I think, and I have seen crown authority and claimant factions at from 70%-100%+. Try to develop your holdings so that you have a lot of troops. Use retinues and mercenaries to have a large force of available troops for a pinch. You should also try to own all of the counties in your duchies to try to make yourself as strong as possible.

4. Don't be afraid to extend your dynasty. Having relatives on foreign thrones makes for good allies. Just be sure to keep yourself stronger than your allies. Don't try to marry one of your sons to a neighboring queen, but dukes in the HRE make good candidates. I like to role play extending my dynasty, so I love doing it, but it isn't required. I have never liked using other characters as guardians to my heirs because they can change the religion/culture of the heir without your input. You could also try marrying your sons to women who have claims to nearby titles. Since the wife's son can inherit her claim and since he is of your dynasty, you could press his claim and make him your vassal if he is of lower rank than you. Don't be afraid of having grandchildren with claims on your titles. It is going to happen and there isn't much you can do about it. What you can do is try to make the danger as little as possible

5. Only males can be council members except for the spymaster. Wives (and mothers, I think) can be your spymaster, though I wouldn't suggest making your wife your spymaster because you don't get as large of a bonus to the realm intrigue skill as you would otherwise.

I hope that helps.

 

[DarthUsopp]

1. Unless your siblings have traits that make them like you then I'd advise against landing them. Also, when landing your children don't give anyone other than your heir more than 1 county.
2. If your brother is landed I'm pretty sure you will continue palying as current character afterwards, so if you want to continue playing as the king and don't want to save and then reload as said brother I'd say no.
3. In the scenario you describe I'd advice to just imprison her. You can imprison anyone who is leading any kind of plot without penalty.
4. I personally prefer to pick a spouse with good stats for my heir and ones that bring good alliances for the others. Of course, having your heir marry someone with good claims or an heir to a title is a good idea too as long as you make sure the children will belong to your dynasty.
5. Any men who are in your court or your direct vassals are eligible to all council positions. The position of spymaster is also availble to your wife and your mother.

 

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4. Don't be afraid to extend your dynasty. Having relatives on foreign thrones makes for good allies. Just be sure to keep yourself stronger than your allies. Don't try to marry one of your sons to a neighboring queen, but dukes in the HRE make good candidates. I like to role play extending my dynasty, so I love doing it, but it isn't required. I have never liked using other characters as guardians to my heirs because they can change the religion/culture of the heir without your input. You could also try marrying your sons to women who have claims to nearby titles. Since the wife's son can inherit her claim and since he is of your dynasty, you could press his claim and make him your vassal if he is of lower rank than you. Don't be afraid of having grandchildren with claims on your titles. It is going to happen and there isn't much you can do about it. What you can do is try to make the danger as little as possible

Thanks a ton for your input. I have a question about pressing claims. I married into a neighboring county with intent on taking it over when my son took throne. Then my brother ousted me and I controlled my brother. So I pressed my now nephew's claim but when I took the county I couldn't ask him to be my vassal because he had a de juir claim on being a duke which is my rank. Did I mess that up somehow? He promptly got conquered by his neighbors to the north so it was rather a wasted effort.

 

[FromasterG]

I don't know if I am reading that correctly, but are you saying that you pressed your nephew's claim on a duchy and made him a duke after you won the war? You cannot have a vassal who is of the same rank as you.

 

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Thanks a ton for your input. I have a question about pressing claims. I married into a neighboring county with intent on taking it over when my son took throne. Then my brother ousted me and I controlled my brother. So I pressed my now nephew's claim but when I took the county I couldn't ask him to be my vassal because he had a de juir claim on being a duke which is my rank. Did I mess that up somehow? He promptly got conquered by his neighbors to the north so it was rather a wasted effort.

If your nephew is still a COUNT, see if that nephew has any siblings. They should have a strong claim, and since they are family, will become your vassal when you press their claim. You didn't really "mess up", as land that your family owns is still better than land that other families own. Eventually you'll have a chance to get that land into your personal demense.

 

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I only captured a county but he must have purchased the de juir duke title before I realized I needed to make him a vassal.