• Crusader Kings III Available Now!

    The realm rejoices as Paradox Interactive announces the launch of Crusader Kings III, the latest entry in the publisher’s grand strategy role-playing game franchise. Advisors may now jockey for positions of influence and adversaries should save their schemes for another day, because on this day Crusader Kings III can be purchased on Steam, the Paradox Store, and other major online retailers.


    Real Strategy Requires Cunning

Lighthearter

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"It's Magdeburg, not MagdebAARg, Johan - what are you, stupid?"

"MAGDEBAARG!"

"Oh boy . . . Oh, hello there gents. My name is Hans, of MagdeBURG-"

"MAGDEBAARG!"

"Shut up, Johan! Sorry about him - he's a little . . . impaired. Now I have graduated top of my class in every class, and am here to serve as your narrator in the history of Magd . . . our noble kingdom. Unfortunately, I've been paired with Johan for this assignment."

"Hello everybody! Guess what color my undies are!"

"Johan, don't you have to go be stupid somewhere else?"

"Not until six, Hansie."

"This is going to be a loooooong AAR . . . ."

"Hello again everybody! Hello again again! This is so much fun! Greetings from MagdebAARg-"

<thud>

"And that, my friends, is why I always keep a shovel on my person."

____________________

As I'm sure you've guessed, Hans and Johan are here to be your guides through the epic story of Magdeburg and its expansion first across Europe, then later the World! Muhahahahaha!!!:wacko:

Oops - forget I did that:eek:o

Anyway - the first update will come soon, as will the introduction of our third narrator, Otto. Please comment in the interim! (Just no guesses on Johan's undies, please . . . .):rolleyes:

This is my first EUIII AAR, by the way, but if you browse my inkwell you can find quite a collection of HOI2 AARs. I'm sure Yes we have no bananas can give you some hints of what's in store;)

- Lighthearter, who is new to the EUIII AARland
 

theconfusedone

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HRE OPM AAR!
Don't form any nations and you'll get a subscriber right here :D
 

JDMS

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Sounds interesting. Following. :)
 

tuore

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More AARs? You have three AoD AARs, one HoI2 AAR and this?
 

Mico94

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another Lighthearter AAR?
dude, do you have 2 clones of yourself or what?;)
how can you manage so many AARs? :eek:

anyway, good luck
 

Lighthearter

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theconfusedone - Form nations? What blasphemy is this?!?!? The Magdeburgian Empire shall continue into Victoria if I'm lucky.:cool:

JDMS - Excellent!:D

blsteen - Three? Well, you could say there are more, but I'll leave that alone for now.:wacko:

Boris ze Spider - How did you know?!?! Are you spying on poor Johan?!?!!

tuore - Why not make more?:D My life force is dependent on AARing . . . .

Enewald - Another reader! Excellent!

Mico94 - Clones? No . . . no . . . but you and your pathetic attempts to stop me shall fail once I unleash the LasAAR of Doom I've been building from every AAR comment I have ever recieved! Every time you post in one of my threads or quote me you further my evil plan! FEAR MY LIGHTHEARTER POWER!!!

I might update today - stay tuned!

- Lighthearter
 

morningSIDEr

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I'm rather enjoying Yes we have no bananas, so I'll keep an eye on this.
 

Lighthearter

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"Hello class, this is one of your teachers, Hans. You are here to learn the history of Magdeburg - please take notes, there will be a test."

"I didn't know there'd be a test! I DIDN'T STUDY!!!"<sobbing>

"Johan, you're one of the teachers."

"That doesn't mean I STUDIED!!"<more sobbing>

"Grrr . . . Johan? If you just . . . umm . . . leave now then I'll . . . ummm . . . pass you."

"YOU WILL??? Oh, thank you, teachie!!!" <kisses Hans repeatedly>

"Johan, enough! Now leave!"

Johan ran to the door, but there came a faint click noise from the other side and he slammed into it. It didn't open.

"NO! Now I'm gonna fail!"

Hans' cell phone starts ringing.

"What? Oh, Chief . . . but Chief, he's an imbecile . . . Chief . . . yes, Chief Principle . . . what was that, Chief Principle Organizer . . . all right, Chief Principle Organizer General Sir . . . she hung up on me!"

Suddenly the teacher's desk flies into the air and a man straightens up from underneath it.

"Hello class - what did I miss?"

"Oh, hello Otto."

"Otto - Hans is going to fail me! I didn't study for the test!"

<Light bulb appears over Hans' head> "Johan, if you go and study in the corner WITHOUT MAKING A SOUND then you might pass the test after all."

"I'll do it! Anything to pass!"

"Oh, so you are teaching the class now? Good, I shall fetch Fritz."

"No, not Fritz!!!"

Otto leans over away from the class and messes with his hair. He stands back up with a general's cap on and a little mustache.

"SILENCE IN THE RANKS! Welcome to Fritz's School of Magdeburgian History. You will pass your end-of-semester exam, or you will SUFFER ZE CONSEQUENCES! IF YOU FAIL THE TEST, THEN YOU WILL BE SURGICALLY PREVENTED FROM EVER REPRODUCING, SO THAT THE POPULATION OF THE MAGDEBURGIAN EMPIRE WILL NOT BE FILLED WITH UNNECESSARY COLLECTIONS OF DUNDERHEADS UNT ZE SECOND-RATE MINDS! NOW DROP AND GIVE ME TWENTY! ONE, TWO, THREE, EIGHTEEN, TWENTY-FOUR, FIFTY, NINETEEN, NINETEEN 3/4, TWENTY!"

"Fritz, may I speak to Otto for a moment?"

"WHAT DID YOU DARE TO ASK ME, YOU FOOLISH ACADEMIC! Oh, yes, I shall fetch him for you."

Otto/Fritz leans over and messes with hair again, returning with Otto's messed up crazy scientist hair.

"You wanted to speak to me, Hans?"

"Yes, could you find Wilhelm?"

"Oh, ja, ja, of course. . . ."

Leans over, returns with top hat on.

"What was it you wanted me for? I am quite busy doing . . . I don't remember now."

"Exactly!"

Thud.

He'll never remember that it was I who did that."

____

First screenshots will come later tonight.:D

- Lighthearter
 

Enewald

Enewald Enewald Enewald
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What schauriges are you writing? :eek:
that does not make any sense.
It makes actually negative sense.
 

JDMS

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The characters are cool. Keep it up. :)