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    Real Strategy Requires Cunning

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
19.876
599
Well, let's start this in my usual way. That is, no making sense at all...

Some of you have already suffered me... er... enjoyed me... er... Well, you just know me... Perhaps some of you even know my dear PetiNiebla, aka Peti. If not, I'll talk about Peti later on, don't worry. Not in this post, but Peti will be back, for sure. Trust me. :D

One thing is sure. Some of you may already know me as one of the readers of your AARs. So, I thought it would be fair to give you the pleasure to of being as "useful and charming" as I usually tend to be with your AARs :D . I hope you're not lost by now...

I'm not quite sure of that, anyway...

The rest of you doesn't know me... yet. If you're wise, you're going to run away while you still have the chance.



So you're still reading... Ok... No one would say I gave no warning...



Let's go to serious matters. Sit down, cause it's gonna be a loooooooong explanation.

Once upon a time I started an AAR in the Spanish AAR section called Lo Llibre dels Feyts - The Book of Deeds. It's the story of the rise to power of the House of Barcelona from a tiny -well, not so tiny- and humble -well, not so... what the... who cares... in short, it's the old story...

Boy meets girl and girl gets... hey, hey, that's not the story I meant!!!!

Well... you know... it's the rise to power of the House of Barcelona from their initial holdings around the county that gives name to the dinasty to the highest rank possible -I'm still playing, so I dunno where this is going to end.

So short, so simple, isn't it?

Good. Well, it's not so simple. Actually, it is so simple, but at the same time it is not (I love when I speak/write so clearly, oh Gosh...). No problem, keep on reading and you'll understand. I hope...

Ok, right now the game it's fooling around the that funny year of 1166 and, due to some problems with the last save, I discovered an old one that made me wonder... "what if I had done something different from what I actually did...".

So I did it... and obtained an unexpected result, by my throat! So I started this second AAR -as a recollection of all the possible and interesting possibilities that could have taken place instead of the main and present course (if you're still on the track and you haven't got lost, my dear reader, I must say that I'm awfully impressed, because I AM lost :D ).

So, let's go to the point... What I plan to do is to narrate the rise to power -or to wherever the games takes me- of this second "game-within-the-game" (damned Shakespeare... I knew that his mouse trap was going to give me troubles some day...) from this twist in the main game. I'll start from the very beginning and go to the turning point, so to speak, and go on from then onward, to wherever it takes me.

Also, I am going to give you all the chance to enjoy it. In addition to this, if I find enough brave volunteers, I would like to do something that is a feature of my Spanish AARs, that is, the participation of the readers as characters of my AAR. So, if you want, just ask for it ;)

In short

Title: Lo Llibre dels Feyts - The Book of Deeds or how I tried to make the House of Barcelona the rulers of Europe -humble, who, me? :D
Game: Crusader Kings (1.05 methinks... the mods drive me mad, so better don't make any kind of guess... it's the CK, who needs more...)
Scenary: 1066
Difficulty: Difficult, so to speak
AI Aggressiveness: Coward (well... I didn't want to finish the game before starting it...)

Pace of updates: One at the week, if everything goes fine -which is rare, trust me...

What else should I say? Er... Oh, just sit down, enjoy and, please, don't hesitate to make all kind of suggestions, questions and wedding proposals -just if you're a charming and millionaire lady (you know, I'm a bit of an eccentric)-.

Any questions? Well, let's go then.
 
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Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
19.876
599
Lo Llibre dels Feyts - The Book of Deeds

Chapter 1- The situation of the Count of Barcelona and his states at the end of the 11th century (taken from the book "The end of the Dark Ages", by Joan Coroleu, Penguin Books, London, 1977)

"1066 was supposed to be a common year in the Gregorian calendar and the Anno Domini era. The year is considered by many historians to be a turning point in history due to various events, particularly the Battle of Hastings, with years prior to 1066 being the late dark ages and years after 1066 being the early middle ages.

However, the most important was going did not took place in a battlefield nor it was recorded by any chronist. However, it did happen.

The situation in Europe in 1006 was as complicated as it had been since the very beginning of the new millenium. The old Hispania was still divided into several kingdoms, most of them originated by the death of Sancho III the Older of Navarra and due to the division of the musulman world into several taifas. As usual, those kingdoms fought with each other with the same enthusiasm that their armies displayed against the enemies of their religion, which, it goes without saying, was not the main of its reasons to act.

Thus, in this bizarre situation, a strange change took place in the court of the count of Barcelona. Ramón Berenguer I of Barcelona, count since the death of his father (1035) since comeing to age in 1041, had reunified Catalonia. To achieve this, he did not hesitate to take the lands of his brothers which his dead father had given them in his last will. Ramon Berenger first obtained the recognition of his overlordship over the county of Urgell and, achieved this, he reinforced his own power and annhilated any kind of rebellion, as Mir Geribert learned in his attempt (1041 to 1067). Ramon Berenger also managed to put an end to 30 years of violence between the nobility and the peasantry and managed to defeat the Musulman armies from time to time.

It is, then, in this moment, when an odd change can be traced in the attitud of the count. A change that goes through all the aspects of his life -personal and political activities and uses, etc- and which is not reduced to him but, as we shall see, seems to affect the whole dinasty
".

 
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unmerged(59077)

Tzar of all the Soviets
Jul 17, 2006
5.575
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Ooh, the Rosetta Stone of AARs.

I'm subscribing. And reading your Spanish one.
 

unmerged(63836)

Field Marshal
Dec 25, 2006
2.590
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I`ll be reading this 'long road to power' AAR. Interesting that some of Spanish words you used, are quite similar to Polish:

Hispania - Hiszpania (Spain)

musulman - muzułmanin (muslim)

Good luck :)
 

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
19.876
599
Judas Maccabeus said:
An alternate-alternate history? Now that's an interesting idea.

And remind me to brush off my rusty old Spanish and try and read the original sometime.
Again, my pleasure and my honour, Judas. I hope that I make worth reading me.
RGB said:
Ooh, the Rosetta Stone of AARs.

I'm subscribing. And reading your Spanish one.
I'm honoured for having such magnificient readers, really! If you happen to have any kind of doubt or trouble with the Spanish language, just let me know. You and all the readers who feel inclilned to read the original sometime.

Just in case: the original is Lo Llibre dels Feyts (CK AAR)

thrashing mad said:
I`ll be reading this 'long road to power' AAR. Interesting that some of Spanish words you used, are quite similar to Polish:

Hispania - Hiszpania (Spain)

musulman - muzułmanin (muslim)

Good luck :)
Thank you!

Oh, before I forget again, in the original Spanish game I stated the following goals of my game.

Primary goals
a) To hange the tide at Muret :D
b) To return Caspe but the other way round... :D :D
c) To turn the Mediterranean sea into a Catalan "lake" and to make Europe tremble when they hear the word Catalan.

As secondary goals

d) Try to give a Catalan king of the House of Barcelona to England -I know it's cruel, trust me... but worse fate is destined to other countries... :D
e) To make a Catalan member of the House of Barcelona Emperor of Germany and the Roman Empire.

These are, in short, my intentions. And trust me, I have a cunning plan to achieve them. :D
 

Veldmaarschalk

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I had a very interesting game once starting as the Barcelona family. So they are one of my favourites

Good luck with this one !
 

CrackdToothGrin

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Vive siempre!

Good luck with this. Playing any Iberian nation is always fun. Show those Moors that the Reconquista can be finished before 1492!

:Subscribed:
 

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
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Veldmaarschalk said:
I had a very interesting game once starting as the Barcelona family. So they are one of my favourites

Good luck with this one !
Thank you! I must say that this family is driving me crazy, but in a fine way :rofl:

CrackdToothGrin said:
Vive siempre!

Good luck with this. Playing any Iberian nation is always fun. Show those Moors that the Reconquista can be finished before 1492!

:Subscribed:
Trust me, they're learning the lesson by heart... :D
 

CrackdToothGrin

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Originally posted by RGB
Trust me, they're learning the lesson by heart... :D
And hopefully by swordpoint... :D

Deus Vult!!!
 

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
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Lo Llibre dels Feyts

Ramon Berenguer I of Barcelona was cold, awfully cold. The winter of 1066 was being very, very cold. He had just ended ameeting with its noblemen and he was thinking about that the coming Christmas seasons, which were going to be an awfull and boring thing -as there were neither Father Xmas nor those yummy Mother Xmas short skirts... er... I think I'm going out of topic...let's see...-. Therefore, Ramon was beginning to feel somewhat depressed. Sitting in his favourite chair and looking as the fire slowly burnt, the count was quite bored, lost in thought, when a little yellow and round thing appeared next to him, coming out from the nowhere.

Doubting of if was a devil or the spirit of his mother in law, Ramon Berenguer searched for anything solid and forceful he may have by hand. However, to his horror, what he touched was not the knob of a sword, but a hand coverd by a black glove. It was not a Moorish hand, no... It was something worse, it was...

-Good night, my lord. Let me introduce myself. I am Kurt Steiner, vacalen... errr... better leave that for future conversations...

The voice came to a slender figure who was dressed in some strange and long black clothes. A pale face look at the count with a cynic smile which filled the count with a sudden need to run away, taking with him all the ladies of his castles (just in case...). By the side of the stranger, a chubby and hairy dog looked at Ramon with a thoughtful air, as if the dog was ready to give an important speech. But the one that spoke was not the dog, but its owner.


Thus remained the poor count, when he saw the stranger...

-...As I was saying I am Kurt Steiner and, despite my Germanic name, I am a true Catalan. I come to you to give you my loyal advice. Trust me, this little yellow thing, this airy dog and me are going to help you in this delicate moment, when a nation is coming to live.

-A delicate moment? But if everything goes so well! -The count exclaimed, once his fear vasnished, feeling himself more puzzled than frightened- I have the Infidel enemies running away and at bay and the nobily under my thumb and...

-Perhaps you know the future, my lord? I don't think so. You don't know it. But I do and, unless you stop thinking about chopping of my head and allow me to advise you on certain decisions that you should take, I may say that the future is not going to be quite good to you. As I was saying, this yellow and round thing that is called...


The yellow thing, better known as...​

-... Petiso Tiso, we come to help you to turn you this humble county in the most powerful force of the Christendom. A day will arrive when from tis palace its lord will dominate not only the fate of Barcelona, but of the entire world. And now, if you does not it think otherwise, my lord, I believe that it's time that we have a small chat...

Some hours later, once the meeting was over, Steiner abandoned the palace of Ramon with his faithful Petiso Tiso sleeping in his pocket and his faithful dog, called PetiNiebla -among many other names, not all of them quite nice- moving happily its tail. They had barely walked a few meters, the count Ramón Berenguer I of Barcelona shouted to Steiner from a window:

-And if we are Catalonians, that we cause we speaking in English?

To what Steiner retorted, with a tender but cynical smile:

-Because the subtitles have not been invented yet, man!

With a happy laughter, Steiner followed his way, while his dog muttered,, in such low, low voice, so low that only Petiso Tiso was able to hear it, the following comment:

-I hope that me they won't fine not for peeing that tree, 'cause I'm dying for a pee.

Had the count known that the dog could talk, I wonder what he would have said about it...

(1) It ss worth saying, that this is the statue of Ramon Berenguer IV, not Ramón Berenguer I, but... you know... shits happen...
 
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Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
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Well, thus the story begins... soon, the next chapter...


CrackdToothGrin said:
And hopefully by swordpoint... :D

Deus Vult!!!
I love this image... I hope you'll see it again :D
 

unmerged(58885)

Second Lieutenant
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Well, well, I'll follow this AAR... as long as I'm the starter of this crazy adventure in english forum thanks to a coment in the spanish forum,jaja... isn't it, Kurt? :D

Give a lesson of the catalan power.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
 

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
19.876
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Font de Llop said:
Well, well, I'll follow this AAR... as long as I'm the starter of this crazy adventure in english forum thanks to a coment in the spanish forum,jaja... isn't it, Kurt? :D

Give a lesson of the catalan power.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
My dear International friends and readers,

Here you have the one to blame for having me here. Just for you to know :D
 

unmerged(59077)

Tzar of all the Soviets
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And that is surely a good thing.
 

DarkReborn

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Kurt, exporting one of the most great spani... catalan products(what is the cava? :D ), keep it going as you know!

Visca reino d'aragó!
 

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Should be fun, presuming the Moors do not steamroller you.
 

unmerged(10971)

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Ah, good, it appears my Spanish--at least as far as reading goes--was correct. And good job editing the "que hacemos hablando en castellano?" ("why are we speaking in Castillan Spanish?") line and making it "why are we speaking in English?"--it's little things like that which make a successful translation. :)
 

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
19.876
599
RGB said:
And that is surely a good thing.
Just give me time... :D

DarkReborn said:
Kurt, exporting one of the most great spani... catalan products(what is the cava? :D ), keep it going as you know!

Visca reino d'aragó!
Vacalanetacialanist product, methinks :rofl:

stnylan said:
Should be fun, presuming the Moors do not steamroller you.
That's what I call optimism.... and what I thought, too :D ... to avoid that, I had a cunning plan, my dear friend... it is a plan as cunning as a fox who's just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University.

Judas Maccabeus said:
Ah, good, it appears my Spanish--at least as far as reading goes--was correct. And good job editing the "que hacemos hablando en castellano?" ("why are we speaking in Castillan Spanish?") line and making it "why are we speaking in English?"--it's little things like that which make a successful translation. :)
Thank you very much for your kindness, Judas, and for your effort of reading the two AARs. Let me add that the first one, is the origin of this one, but let's remember that, at a given point, the two stories go through different ways... ;)
 

Kurt_Steiner

Katalaanse Burger en Terroriste
Feb 12, 2005
19.876
599
Lo Llibre dels Feyts -The Book of Deeds


Chapter 2: The Last Years of Ramón Berenguer the Older

o

The Glory of the ternasco al chilindrón -1- and other dangerous campaign.

1066 was, without a single doubt, the turning point of the rise to power of the count of Barcelona. As it has been suggestesd previously, the count experiencied an odd change in his behaviour that had an inmediate effect upon his political actions. After many years of wars against the muslim enemy, Ramón Berenguer takes, unexpectedly, a defensive attitude which cannot be fully explained.


The county of Barcelona in 1066 and its happy neighbours and vassals.

Suddenly, luck strikes in his favour. While the count of Barcelona manages to bring peace to his lands, his neighbours begin to fight fiercely one against each other. Of course, Ramón Berenguer -and his heir, as we shall see- takes fully advantage of it. While the different kingdoms and sheikdoms are devastated by the war and the plague, the little Catalan country enjoys a happy time of prosperity and peace. The treasure is filled by the commercial deals and the cities grown and develop.

Meanwhile, in Castille things begin to get really funny. Sancho II of Castille betrays his sister Urraca and grabs his county of Soria. Alfonso VI of Leon, filled sudenly with brotherly love towards her sister, allies himself with Navarra in what was called the treaty of Torroja. Sancho, who feels himself threatened by this move, attacks Navarra in March, 1067. This mistake, of course, is not wasted, as Alfonso takes it as a casus belli to wage war against his brother. Thus a long war began, interrupted several times, as, for instance, when Alfonso, who had laid siege to Burgos, had to rush to defend Salamanca from the moors.

Thus the war would go on and on and on, till Alfonso defeated Sancho in 1071. Alfonso, new king of Castille, kept his brother, as Duke of Castille, by his side, but just to thrown him, with their sister Urraca, into obscurity and oblivion, in such a sad way that no one shed a tear for the early death of Sancho in 1073, without a heir, by the way. From that moment on, Alfonso would try to defeat the infidel enemies. However, the musulman sheik of Toledo was unaware of this -so, he can be forgotten for this silly mistake- and defeated him at Salamanca in 1075.

It must be mentioned that Alfonso thought he could defeat Toledo as, since 1068, the sheik of Toleado was in war with Valencia. A war, it must be mentioned, that gave time to Barcelona to prepare for war, while waiting for a mistake. And the mistake came in 1071 when, hardly finished the war with Toledo, the young sheik of Valencia declared war to Aragon, taking by surprise the reduced forces of the Christian king, who, despite of his brave courage, couldn't avoid defeat and retreated into France.

Luckily for Ramon, the musulman offensive kept its pace towards the northern counties, conquering briefly Jaca in 1072 and crossing the Pyrinees towards Tolouse. It's the chance that Ramón Berenguer had been waiting for...

The Catalan armies gather and, knowing that Zaragoza and Jaca are virtually unprotected, moves cautiosly, while waiting the confrontation that is inminent in the northern lands. Would it be a second Poitiers or a new Guadalete? However, the young Aragonese king tries to recover his lands, and thus obliges Ramón to act. In the same moment that he knows that the musulman army has been annihilated in front of Tolouse, Ramón Berenguer waiting for the kill, attacks and conquers Zaragoza, while the king of Navarra does the same with Calatayud -2-.

After this warlike times, pace settles and the count of Barcelona begins too watch what is going on at the other side of the Pyrinees. He sees the rise and the fall of the proud noblemen of those lands but, of course, keeping an eye at what is going on in the Musulman lands. And when everything seems to be ready to try to gain some influence upon Tolouse and the other counties, suddenly the Moor sheikdomspower suffers another civil war.

Sigh... he has to rush again. Thus Ramón gather his host again and, while the main armies are busy bleeding themselves white far, far away, Ramón send his sond Pere Ramón to conquer Tarragona while he makes a probing attack to the Ballearic islands. The old Roman city is taken in August, 1075, after some unavoidable bloodshed and the heir of Barcelona returns to his father to claim for his victory, not only at Tarragona, but also at Albarracín -3-.

This victories weren't without danger, of course, as the Muslim armies replied in 1076, when the sheik of Valencia declared war to the Catalan count. The situation, however, was saved, unexpectedly, by Castille, who declared war to Toledo, while Cadiz did the same to Sevilla -only to be defeated and conquered by the latter...-. So, Valencia found itself without allies and with his army annhilated by the tremendous charge of the few but corageous Catalan knights, who pursued them till the very gates of Valencia. And, as they were there and as to return home empty handed would have been pretty silly, Ramón began the siege of Valencia, who lasted until 1077. Thus, the Conquest of Mallorca had to be postponed, again, this time until 1082. Meanwhile, Ramón conquered Dènia and Murcia, but failed to go ahead at Almansa. Just death could stop the conquering whises of Ramón Berenguer, who died in 1080. This enterprise, along with the Majorca question, was placed on the shoulders of his son, Pere -4-.

Ramón Berenguer I, the Older, Count of Barcelona, Girona (1035-1080) and Osona (1054-1080).

-1-Typical food from Aragon, sinfully delicious


-2-In some uncanny way, the king of Aragon (hi, Frodo) managed to recover Jaca. Damn it...
-3-Ok, see... I wanted to do a limited campaign, you know (to conquer Tarragona) but I saw that the Navarrese army was prepared to conquer the neighbouring lands, so... well...
-4-Pere, aka now as the "Ardoroso" (poetically speaking, the "Lover of Lovers"), more inclined to make love than war. And, damned by his soul, his heir resembled to him in this particular affair. No, I couldn't get a Cid, a Terminator, an Alexander, but no, I had to get a Don Juan!!!! And not a single one, no, I had to find two!!!!
 
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