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Brandenburg III

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After some deliberation and patiently waiting, I’ve decided that I can no longer wait. I’m going to write another AAR before I pick up NA and IN.

So this is going to follow the same vein as my Yaroslavl, Yourself AAR but this AAR is going to have far fewer pics. I’ll also follow the point ‘don’t bore us, get to the chorus.’ Now that I have the first AAR out of the way, hopefully I’ll be able to refine what I’ve done. So for those of you who aren’t into narratives, here’s a Japan AAR from 1.3 with MM on the hard level. And as with my Yaroslavl, Yourself AAR, if you have questions on whether or not I’m cheating (I’m not) or anything like that, feel free to request the save. I’ll send it. I’ll publish a post when the save will no longer be available.

I’ve never played an Asian country yet and I hear Japan can be tough with MM. I know it always ends up shattered in my games so let’s see how it goes.

EDIT: Actually, this morphed into a comedy/gameplay AAR with more emphasis on the humor as the posts go on. While I hadn’t expected to write the AAR this way, nor have I ever attempted humor writing before, it seems to have turned out well enough. Feel free to comment whenever you like no matter where you're at. There aren't too many posts so it shouldn't take too long to get caught up/read through.
 
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Brandenburg III

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Its big, its red, its Japan. What are you waiting for? A screenshot of Japan? What’s wrong, you don’t know where it is? Well, tough.

Japan starts off with 2 infantry regiments and 22 galleys! Well, I’m not going to need all those ships right now so let’s take 7 and let them sink. 15 left. That’s a good number although my favorite number was always 25. Its pretty, nice and curvy, a little like an hourglass yet not too far from a world-class model.

Amuse yourself with this screenshot while I tell you about the land army advisor I hired... yeah, six stars! Not that I plan on doing a lot of land-based things but you never know. I moved the slider one closer to quality, began building a real military and started constructing 7 cogs. Don’t look at me like that... we’re going to be nice.

EU3_1.jpg


From here on out all armies are 3 infantry and 2 cavalry unless otherwise stated. I’m not sure why its my preferred army set up, probably so I don’t have to wonder ‘Now where did I put my big cavalry stack? Oh, its in Siberia taking on monstrous attrition?!?” The infantry/cavalry mix makes it so I don’t have to move around my armies too much while I’m sieging something; this way I’m able to cover fire and shock... and read.

And almost right away I received this succession thing. It isn’t looking too hot right now but I mentioned Siberia being close by, right?

EU3_2.jpg


I should mention that I hate trading. I almost never do it for the same reason I almost never stick my tongue to a flagpole in the middle of winter: I’ll get stuck. I won’t be able to attack because my merchants will have to fight with enemy spies, I’ll spend 2 national ideas getting it straight and the fire station will have to be called to unfreeze my tongue.

While I was sitting here getting into A Guide to the Battles of the American Revolution, I saw this:

EU3_3.jpg


Korea of all nations wants to ally with me! So we become BFF.... until they decline my royal marriage. Our relations are now somewhere around -60 but it looks like I’m their only choice for an ally. Its kind of like that Huey Lewis song, it goes something like this “Yes its true... I’m so happy to be stuck with you...” Anyway, I’m hoping they declare war on Manchu because my transports are ready and rearing to become taxis for my sweet, sweet army. By the way, I now have 3 armies, so, lookout.

By 1456 I was becoming terribly bored. I had put down A Guide to the Battles of the American Revolution in 1455 and had been deciding whether or not to return Ringworld to my bookshelf. Instead of getting up, I declared war on Brunei.

It turned out, Sulu and Makassar were allies of Brunei! It’s a 3 for 1 deal at EU3-Mart. And to my surprise Korea helped!

EU3_4.jpg


This war wasn’t too exciting. I created another army in Japan, annexed Sulu in 20 days and overran Brunei with the 1st and 4th Armies by September 1457. They became vassals, paid the introduction fee of 50 ducats and my armies went home. A little while later Brunei entered my alliance.

I often like to lead my own alliance. If I can’t trust a nation to come to my aid then the alliance isn’t worth much. But if I can get a bunch of tiny countries together and if we can declare war all at once, it’s a nice feeling. Its like Rent-A-Friend. And whenever they commit to a call to arms I suddenly feel like Sally Fields accepting her award, “You like me! You like me!”

Do you believe in Karma? Because if you do you’re in luck. These two events happened to me within two years of the Brunei peace, taking all my armies to put down the last revolt. I haven’t felt that uncomfortable since two Star Trek fanatics had an ‘I’m not a Trekkie, I’m a Trekker’ argument in my downtown diner. And my downtown consists of two streets, each less than a half a mile so you can imagine the look of the locals who do nothing but drink black coffee, repeating the same line they heard their fathers say, “This country is going straight to hell.”

EU3_5.jpg


So Makassar got off the hook in the last war. I knew I was omitting them when I signed a peace with Brunei but Makassar had 6k infantry and I wasn’t about to invade them from the sea! And, oh no, its 1464 and I promised myself to only update in ten year intervals. At least I know what happened.
 

PrawnStar

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Nice. I'll follow this one - the Algiers one is good too but I'm a gameplay sort of person, but you probably noticed already.

Trading is mildy interesting but it takes all the fun out of war when you realise those three nice new shiny provinces have just managed to cut 50% off your income LOL
 

Brandenburg III

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Demon1 said:
Nice :cool: Are you going to be nice Japan or mean Japan?

I’m going to try and be nice but don’t be surprised if I develop a mean streak over time. When I get bored I often find something to do. ;)

Coinneach said:
theres such a thing as nice Japan :eek: :rofl:

:D

PrawnStar said:
Nice. I'll follow this one - the Algiers one is good too but I'm a gameplay sort of person, but you probably noticed already.

Trading is mildy interesting but it takes all the fun out of war when you realise those three nice new shiny provinces have just managed to cut 50% off your income LOL

No worries. I know exactly how you feel. While writing comes easier to me than photoshop I’d rather see how a person plays than how their character reacts. I don’t mind doing the gameplay AAR though, its easy to do, I just hate messing around with all those screenshots.

Trading is... boring in 1.3 Plus there are some horrible anti-trade spy missions which the enemy often uses in war. Its been a while since I read it but Amric’s Scotland AAR will show you what havoc trading while warring can do: http://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/showthread.php?t=316602 (I believe that’s the one). I’ve never been much of a trader in Paradox games anyway.

To all:

Here are my basic house rules. I realize I could edit my first post but... this is easier.

- No cheating. I’ve never even read how so I wouldn’t be tempted.
- I can’t use spies to gain cores (it takes 75 years with MM to gain a core on a province.)
- I am allowed to give loans but never more than one at a time and never for more than 30 ducats. Also, I’m not allowed to give loans for a CB. If a CB is received because of a loan, I can’t declare war on that nation.
- No intentional turbo-annexing.
- (For this game) There have been no alterations before the game.
- I can’t attack native American tribes before 1550.
- I can’t intentionally take loans.
- and... that’s about it.

Also for those concerned, I will do my 50 year updates covering all the stuff you’d probably want to know. If you’ve read my Yaroslavl, Yourself AAR then you know what I’m talking about, if you haven’t then you can go to the AAR (through my sig) and on the last page, post #108, an example lies in waiting for you.
 

Maginor

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The first screenshot is amusing. Ålands hav, Vänern and Vättern are suddenly Japanese land provinces. And all the time I thought they were Swedish lakes and sea provinces.
 

Brandenburg III

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Many people like reading AARs but they stay silent. That’s fine, I’m silent with the few AARs I read. Because of the silence I naturally thought my girlfriend was one of those people.

I started explaining to her about my conquests in Japan and my future plans and do you know what she tells me? She said, “I don’t care about your stupid game!”

I tried reasoning with her, telling her that EU3 isn’t stupid. First, because it’s a game and second because its awesome! Something that’s awesome cannot be called ‘stupid.’ I went on talking about the game and my plans and she seemed completely disinterested! I know it was just a ploy. There is no way anyone can’t like hearing these stories!

When I finished I decided to turn on the computer and start writing. And for some reason I’m getting the death stare. She probably thinks I’m talking about her. She’s so paranoid!

I guess you’re wondering about my Makassar teaser at the end of the last post. And I guess it’d be really mean of me to say that nothing happened, wouldn’t it.

Around 1464 I was getting bored again. I noticed my bad boy was low and my WE was more or less non-existent. So like a lonely man at a singles bar I pretended I was into the scene while bringing up my screen telling me who I had cassius bellis against - if you have any idea what that line means, clue me in. And as it turned out, Makassar was still embargoing me! I was going to take someone home! I DOW’d them and Aceh joined them. Luckily for me Aceh just got owned by Malacca and only had four or five provinces left. In terms of food, Aceh was the main course and Makassar was the dessert.

I positioned my ships and by 4 May 1464 Aceh surrendered after I only captured two of their provinces. Naturally they became vassals and paid me my money. They also entered my alliance. I probably should’ve taken a screenshot of that one but... I didn’t. I took this instead which ended the war.

EU3_10.jpg


A little while later, sometime in 1470, Korea DOW Manchu. Naturally, because I’m being nice, Japan helps! Really I hope to take away a province or two, leaving Korea with nothing. Its kind of like when you give a donation to a beggar only to knock him out in the back alley... and steal his tip cup. Oh, and I did get a new King/Leader/whateveryouwanttocallhim. Admin 5 Dip 8 Mil 5

11.jpg


About six months later Korea peaces out of the war with nothing gained or lost. Great. My aim now is to run all over the place like a blind man playing tag. Unfortunately, I run into a few trees and barns along the way. Not even Deva Bengal’s DOW against Oriate Horde and Manchu would weaken the Manchu resolve so by 1473 I was forced into a white peace. There wasn’t much I could do... Good news is that a 5th Army was created between 1470 - 3.

If this were a more detailed AAR I would’ve provided screenshots of the war every six months or every year... but this isn’t that kind of AAR. Beggars can’t be choosers... unless if you offer more than one thing to a beggar and tell him he can only have one. But that seems a bit cruel which is probably why my friends give me chagrined looks when I tell them my stories.

1474 ended with a few minor events. I received the option to change my national tactics but I liked my cavalry superiority so I didn’t change anything (I don’t like change when I’m at +3) and I ended up with a Gift to the State +200 ducats! On top of the 2k I already have. I never have this much so early in the game... But when I do its always when I have nothing to buy. Don’t worry, in my following updates I’ll find something to spend it on.

12.jpg


***

Unfortunately I’ve played ahead a bit - quite a bit as I’ve been picking at this game for a few weeks now - and have found a spot in it where I’m receiving CTD’s on 10 April 153something. I’ve tried a number of different things to fix it but nothing has worked yet. If I can’t figure something out over the next 48 hours I’ll probably end the play at 153wherever-I’m-at. However I will continue the AAR but I wanted to state this. I also want to add that CTD’s almost never happen to me. I’ve had only a few in Eu3 but I’m getting a ton while playing as Japan. Its annoying.
 
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Brandenburg III

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Maginor said:
The first screenshot is amusing. Ålands hav, Vänern and Vättern are suddenly Japanese land provinces. And all the time I thought they were Swedish lakes and sea provinces.

I noticed this in one of my previous games and have come to one conclusion: The alteration of Japanese names with Swedish ones are an obvious attempt by Paradox for world domination. Its all about subliminal messages and they’re starting with Japan! :eek:

It is a little discerning when finding out your army has just landed at: Bay of ????
 

Darthvegeta800

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Lol hilarious! :rofl:

Since you're playing with the MM mod will you try to avoid having your country split into warring factions or will you 'let it happen'? (i've done that in the past as it sometimes creates very fun situations)
 
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Brandenburg III

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Demon1 said:
As i dont have MM what does the change national tactics event do :confused:
Nicely done though

To show you my dedication, here’s a screen shot. I can’t remember what the other tactics did but I liked cavalry the best at the time. To add, I think it was a Japanese specific event because I never received it playing any other country. My government, also Japan specific, removes 75% manpower iirc.

And thanks!

I'm not sure how to get rid of all the empty space but it was a quick pic anyway. :D


untitled.jpg



Darthvegeta800 said:
Lol hilarious! :rofl:

Since you're playing with the MM mod will you try to avoid having your country split into warring factions or will you 'let it happen'? (i've done that in the past as it sometimes creates very fun situations)

Thanks. My first attempt at humor.

As for splitting Japan, I thought the challenge might lay in keeping it together since it always seemed very fractured. I never read the MM manual so I’m not sure what triggers it but when/if it already hasn’t happened ;) I’m going to make attempts to keep it as one big Japan.

NOTICE: I have managed to fix whatever CTD problem I was having. I don't know what I did, but apparently I did it! I can't guarantee against gaming problems in the future but this one is fixed.
 
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Brandenburg III

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I know I said the Algiers AAR would take precedent but this is so much easier to write! For those following the Algiers story, an update should be out within the next 24 hours. Okay, enough taunting the narrative readers... even though they’re probably not reading this anyway.

Looking back over my notes, I scribbled down something about not being able to find a pen. Instantly I remembered what I was thinking at the time because nothing else was happening during the day. I was wondering, ‘If I were a pen, where would I be?’ That thought actually crossed my mind! Which was followed by, ‘I’d be right where my owner put me’ and so that logic didn’t really help me out at all. It turns out that if I were a pen, I would’ve been stuck between the first article in Foreign Affairs. Who knew!

There really wasn’t a lot that happened between 1475 - 1484 but I’ll do my best to put as much filler in here as possible. See? I’m already doing well!

After eight months Korea got a bug up its crawl - I told Korea to wash but it never did - and declared war on Manchu. I guess an unfortified neighbor is just asking for war.

10dwcvm.jpg


See? I told you. I don’t remember seeing all that scribbled writing in either of MM’s or Paradox’s notes but needless to say, I was a little surprised they would be rooting for the player that much. I guess putting a 20k army in one province for years and years isn’t enough.

My aims in the war were a little leaner this time. Ming had split Manchu in two parts: on one side sat Wusuli (a fish province?) and on the other was Manchu’s capital, a province to their north and a fortified province on Korea’s border... I do have a close up of a battle... hold on, let me pull it up. Ah, here it is.

This is a close-up of the battlefield. And just so Paradox and the moderators know, yes, this is an original so no copyright laws were broken. I even signed it so it’ll be worth money some day! (Japan is on the left...)

wisp4h.jpg


Come May of 1476 I finally forced Manchu into a peace simply by occupying Wusuli... and Korea doing all the fighting. It was great! Its kind of like when your plane gets stranded in 1980's Rock N Roll ville and the only thing to do is party with Aerosmith while another plane, carrying your co-workers, heads to the meeting in Bangor, Maine where mathematicians discuss how to better their social lives. They won’t figure it out but they will end up forcing Manchu to cede Wusuli and 75 ducats. :D

30s9028.jpg


And now it gets boring. More boring than that time you watched your Aunt Mildred pry away the cushions of the furniture looking for loose change, all the while wondering, ‘What parent would name their child, “Mildred?’” It sounds like a B-Movie about a sawmill running amok on a small town, eating children and chopping wood yet perfecting the Dutch wooden shoe.


Then it came! Like a glorious shot of life which feels just like slamming down twenty pixie sticks all at once, I hit Production tech 1! Immediately workshops started being built all over the place like little bits of awesome spreading their awesomeness wherever they went. I calculated it up and I’m now expected to receive about 50 or so more ducats a year!

The next couple of years were ‘reading years’ in which I mostly read, pointing and clicking the mouse whenever a pop-up hit. I found and hired a 2 star government advisor, built the 6th army and constructed six more cogs which was to become the foundation of a not-so-epic 2nd Navy.

And then it came again three years later like an AC/DC album with the same feeling and the same songs. I hit Land Tech 1 and built forts where they needed to be. By 1481, in terms of workshops and forts, all was right with the world. To celebrate, I agreed to a royal marriage with Korea and I was feeling good about returning to our BFF status. I was a little concerned when Korea started spreading rumors about me in the halls but she came around. We’re even starting to hold hands in the hall and all the other kids are watching!

27ytj00.jpg


I felt confident enough to take a couple of stab hits so I dropped National Conscripts and picked up QftNW. Yeah, baby! We’re gonna party like its 1499! So I guess that means we’re not going to party at all. :( Since I was taking stab hits like there’s no tomorrow, I also moved the slider toward Free Subjects. I’m going to force-feed freedom to them if I have to shove entire arm down their throats!

Coincidentally, and this would’ve been great if I were writing a narrative, a few months later one of my advisors died and a 3 star stab was waiting in the wings. I went on and hired a conquistador and started going north into Siberia. How’d you like to be drafted for that mission? Here’s my advisors and my colonial policies.

2i7px02.jpg


By the end of 1482 I was feeling luckier than a loner on the streets of Las Vegas so I sent a missionary off to Ezochi. My success was somewhere under 50 or 40% but I’m feeling lucky. And while I’m feeling lucky, Korea DOW’s Manchu again. Again I help and tell myself, ‘You’re just going to demand war taxes from your Free Subjects.’ But the urge of a non-fortified neighbor is too strong and I swept my Siberian army around discovered lands and invaded from the north while Korea sealed the south. Manchu eventually accepted this deal... and so, Manchu became Awesome by Association. Manchu was 2 provinces at the time, after Korea took Manchu’s only fortified region left.

2i2bcwp.jpg


And now its 1484.
 

Brandenburg III

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Demon1 said:
Nice but that amount of ducats doesent fit. Did you :eek: GASP :eek: cheat :mad: .

War taxes at +3 stab... there's never a single war I don't raise war taxes and with Korea doing a lot of the heavy fighting I never raised my maintenance levels. That also comes from the other wars too where I didn't raise maintenance if I didn't have to. If you want to check the save, I'm still offering to send it... provided you send me information on how.
 

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Hope Ming likes you now!

Any chance we can see your Siberian discoveries and are you colonising anything yet?

That's funny about War Taxes - I never raise them! Just think Britain and France might have balanced their budgets if WW2 had ended in April 1940 :wacko:
 

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PrawnStar said:
Hope Ming likes you now!

Any chance we can see your Siberian discoveries and are you colonising anything yet?

That's funny about War Taxes - I never raise them! Just think Britain and France might have balanced their budgets if WW2 had ended in April 1940 :wacko:

There'll be a few comments about Ming in the next update.

I think you may receive a glimpse in the next update but if not, you'll definitely see something in the 1500 update. If you look on the last image, you can see I got an early start on the Kurils. A fish province but its a start. And how can you live without war taxes? I couldn't get by without them even if they do cut into my manpower.

I'm also wondering, how many AARs can I write where I'll be accused of cheating? :rofl: One of these days I'll have to bring a bunch of people into a multiplayer game just so they can watch me play.
 

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Brandenburg III said:
War taxes at +3 stab... there's never a single war I don't raise war taxes and with Korea doing a lot of the heavy fighting I never raised my maintenance levels. That also comes from the other wars too where I didn't raise maintenance if I didn't have to. If you want to check the save, I'm still offering to send it... provided you send me information on how.
Uh i dont even know where it would be saved :eek:o nevermind how to open it up :eek:o :eek:o
 

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Demon1 said:
Uh i dont even know where it would be saved :eek:o nevermind how to open it up :eek:o :eek:o

Don't feel bad, I'm not very astute when it comes to breaking down computer stuff either... if you know anyone in the forums who knows this stuff then I could send it there. Or, if someone reading this understands the save game stuff, I'd be very grateful. Not only to end the dispute this time, but so I can reference it for future claims and games. I will be out most of the day today but I'll be checking now and again later tonight and if someone comes forth or is found I'll send it as soon as instructed how.
 

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I still have my notes between the start of the game and 1484 so this should suffice if a save game exchange can’t be made. I will go on to say that this will be the last time I ever address cheating in any AAR I write because I DON”T DO IT. I’ve noticed in other threads that whenever a player does well, cheating is automatically assumed. Eu3 is about the only computer game I play and because of this, I play it well. Likewise, I’m horrible with Victoria: Empire Under the Sun. That’s why you won’t see a Victoria AAR for a while... at least not until I pick up the expansion. As for the stars next to the dashes, those were pics I took. I will not upload every pic but you can find which ones I used in the aar if you want to go searching. It isn’t my responsibility to prove to anyone that I’m not cheating, but if you believe I am, then it is your responsibility to prove it... And after I hit +3 stab I fired my advisors, you'll see it if you read this, and I never fell below it iirc. Now, onto my Japan notes:

At start date Japan has 2 infantry regiments and some ships, as I mentioned at the beginning of my AAR. Japan makes 153 ducats a year with +1 stab and starts with 309. I would like to remind those interested that I do raise war taxes in every war even though I don’t mention it in my notes. Also, when I can abuse it, I wait until one year and a day after war was declared to sign for peace this way I can expand the war taxes an extra year to make more money with reduced maintenance.

1453

*- Start w/ 22 galley; disband 7, hire 6 star land; religion pic; move slider to quality, begin building military.
-Oct 19, begin building 7 cogs
- Dec 1, 1st and 2nd armies created, both are 2/3/0
*-Dec 31, pic of dispute

1454

*-April 16, alliance offer from Korea! Accept but they reject RM
-May 26, 3rd Army created for North Japan
- June 11, 1st navy is now 15 galley and 7 cog

1456

- *April 2, Dow Brunei; Sulu, Makassar and Brunei v. me and korea
- April 25, Sulu annexed
June 2, 4th army created for Southern japan

1457

-*Sept 3, pic; they accept and become vassals and pay 50; used 1st and 4th armies for war
-Nov 12, Brunei enters alliance

1458

-*Sept 15, pic

1460
-*April 27, pic
-Dec 13, rebs destroyed after all armies help

1464

- Feb 27, Dow Makassar; no stab hit cause they still embargo; me, Brunei and Korea v. Makassar and Aceh
- May 4, after 2nd captures 2 of 4 provinces, Aceh agrees to peace; they only had 4 reg; become vassal and pay 50
-July 12, Aceh enters alliance

1465

- *June 1, pic; Makassar surrender; enter alliance 1 month later

1466

-*May 10, new leader

1470

-**July 25, Korea Dow Manchu, we help; Manchu and Oriate Horde v. me and Korea; Oriate can’t reach us due to Ming occupations

1471

-Jan 30, Korea/Manchu w.p. (White peace)
-Feb 25, give Ming MA
-March 14, Deva Bengal v. Oriate Horde; Oriate and Manchu v. Deva Bengal alliance

1472

- March 1, 5th army created
-Aug 29, wp w/ oriate horde

1473

-Sept 24, wp w/ manchu :(

1474

-*April 1, pic; fire both stab advisors
-*Dec 31, pic

1475

-Aug 26, korea dow Manchu; we help; same war as last time

1476

-*May 7, peace; Manchu pays 75 and cedes Wusuli
-Aug 27, Korea/Manchu, wp
-*Sept 1, prod , build workshops everywhere; economy to go up nearly 50 [ducats] a year

1477

-April 12, hire 2 star gove
-Oct 23, build 6th Army and construct 6 more cogs and 1 galley to become 2nd fleet

1478

-April 1, hire 1 star land advisor

1480

-April 1, lvl 1 land tech reached; build lvl 1 fort where needed

1481

June 10, Korea sends RM (royal marriage), we accept

1482

- Jan 1, change NI to QftNW and move slider +1 free subjects
-*Feb 9, pic
-*April 1, our non-mil advisor dies; hire 3 star stab
- June 1, hire conquistador for 5th army in Wusuli
Oct 2, hire explorer for 1st navy (forgot to mention this in the AAR)
-Oct 6, Korea Dow Manchu; we help but not really
-Nov 17, send mish to Ezochi

1483

-June 1, start sending colonists to Kurils; most success rate
- * Sept 10, the war, okay, so I will help
-Sept 13, wp w/ Oriate Horde
Oct 14, Korea and Manchu peace; Manchu cedes Haixi
-*Oct 22, peace pic; they accept
- Nov 29, Manchu (2 prov) enters alliance

And this is where we’re at now. If anyone wants the saved game or wants to talk about this further, Private Message me, don’t clutter the message board.