• Crusader Kings III Available Now!

    The realm rejoices as Paradox Interactive announces the launch of Crusader Kings III, the latest entry in the publisher’s grand strategy role-playing game franchise. Advisors may now jockey for positions of influence and adversaries should save their schemes for another day, because on this day Crusader Kings III can be purchased on Steam, the Paradox Store, and other major online retailers.


    Real Strategy Requires Cunning

canadiancreed

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So because I've gotten the craving to do my first AAR write-up in four years or so, I give to you....

[video=youtube_share;Thls_tMuFkc]http://youtu.be/Thls_tMuFkc[/video]

(thanks Ray)

Yes Georgia, the Kingdom that everyone outsides of the Caucasus thinks is in the New World somewhere is the Kingdom I'm going to try to keep alive from 1066 until the Mongols stop by and curbstop me in the Black Sea. So let's see what this garden of Eden that my Kingdom is placed in looks like, and just how much of a masochist I am for taking these guys on.
 

unmerged(254030)

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Lets see it!
 

canadiancreed

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Well the title says it all, so let's see whose next door that I can borrow some sugar from, and listen to their damn dog bark all night long.



Quite a sorted cast isn't it. Let's get to know the neighbours, from top to bottom, shall we?

The Cumans - That MASSIVE sandy coloured blog to the north of us, they hate us and want us dead. Thankfully, compared to the Russian princes, we're as rich in gold as we are in flat land, so for the time being we're on their ignore list.

Korchev - That slightly less purple peninsula in the Black Sea, it's an independent count that tolerates my existence. They also enjoy their independance, so getting them to join our group instead of the duchy of Crimea (and hence part of the purple behemoth) is going to be "fun".

Alania - Some duchy that also tolerates us, also values it's independence, but can back it up with steel. For some reason they get a voice in our affairs, and would love to have my crown, but at least they dont' want us dead, so that's...nice.

Kakheti - They're Christian, they're Georgian, they have a picture of Ray Charles on their mantelpiece. In short they're the only folks in the area that really love us for us. And being right in the centre of the Caucasus Mountains, they're almost as dirt poor as us too. Beggars cant' be choosers I suppose.

Kartli - They're Muslim, they hate us, but they thought Kakheti's pink motif was FABULOUSSSSS! Thankfully they're also just as dirt poor, so they're as threatening to us as we are to everyone else.

Derbent - The local rep for the Sejuk Turks. They're not big, but they have rich provinces, PITA to attack territories, and they usually invite friends when fighting them. Oh, and they hate us and want us dead (notice a theme here?)

Dwim - Another fly speck Muslin Emir. Another one with big friends. Another that wants us....well you get the idea.

Byzantium Empire - They're the power of this side of the world. One of their themes, or duchies as those Western Euro folks call them, could quickly squash us like a bug, and probably would except for one thing, which I'll mention in a bit. In short, they tolerate us as long as we don't do anything stupid, and are called to war when asked. If we use our "in" with them.....we're kind of fucked.

The Caucasus Mountains - Our best ally against almost everyone. If only they weren't' so resilient to growing something to eat.

Needless to say, paranoia will be a semi-common trait around these parts.
 

canadiancreed

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So what's the fifty year plan?

Well for our red books five decade plan, we need to get from being flyspec sized to being able to at least hold our own if some of the neighbouring themes were into some eastern Baltic beachfront, the Cumans were into some mountain air, or the Sejuks wanted some target practice. So with that in mind, this is the plan for at least the next few decades.

Consolidate the Kingdom - Half of it is taken up by the Duke (insert name here), who probably got his title due to this "wonderful" gavelkind inheritance that I start out with. Seriously it's just f'in awesome to have your kingdom ripped apart with your ten kids when you kick the bucket. So getting the lands from my sound cousin into my realm so I can enjoy this high demese limit is on the agency eventually. He's a bit too powerful, and too in love with them to do so willingly though at the moment.

Take over the smaller kingdoms - All the one province counts and emirs? First targets right away. Otherwise the Duchy of Terbizond or Alania will beat us to the punch, and then we're fighting even more of an uphill battle.

Conquer Alania - For some reason they've got a voice in our affairs, yet are independent. Once the smaller kingdoms are consolidated, they would be next, as they have quite a bit of manpower to throw around. Plus Alania makes a great capital area (two baronies? yes please!)

Try not to piss off the three behemoths on my borders - By the time I'm done, I should have the Sejuks, the Byzatiums, and the Cumans as my three neighbours. Even if everything falls into place, they would still be able to wipe us off the face of the earth if they put their mind to it. And as two of them have a permanent Muslim version of Deus Velt for us (and all our neighbours), We have to make sure the Byzizzies are our perma-friends. For now we do so at least our western flank is covered, but if the long knives come out, like they often do in Constantinople.....things could get damn scary in a hurry.
 

canadiancreed

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(Bagrat? Seriously? And this is the fourth? was poopbucket too common to be noble?)

So here's the man in charge of this unstable shore of the Black Sea. Diplomatic, loves to fight, and has as much of an adversion to learning as this guy...



...so in short, he'd fit right in as an MP for a riding in Alberta in present day (ooo political and present day. So risque). Thankfully for my immediate luck, he's got the personal traits of a stereotypical chivalrous knight, so taking over non-Christian provinces will be a tad bit easier, to say nothing of having folks in the area not wishing I was dead. Add two kids that aren't complete vegetables and you've got a decent inheritance setup. And as his kid as the same stewartship skill as his dear old dad (stewartship; your favourite stat for rulers), I wont' need to hold back on conquering too much. Not that I would to begin with.

The rest of the fam is pretty self explanatory. Sisters that will more then likely be a pain in the ass because they're little brats should be king, brothers that are dead but their sons are my strongest rival in the kingdom. No big deal right?

EDIT: For some reason I thought an aunt was the queen of the Byzantium Empire, hence the reference having friends in high places, but as that's not the case....doh.
 

Avindian

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You certainly have not chosen an easy assignment; still, I love a good underdog story and I can't wait to see how you do!
 

unmerged(96639)

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Nifty little AAR. The Georgians are in a tough spot, but I guess a cornered animal fights the fiercest. Sounds like you've got a plan of action ready, provided things don't go horribly horribly wrong. As they often do.
 

canadiancreed

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Meet the Bagrat crew!

Bagrat, ratbag? Who the hell comes up with names in this part of the world?!

Anyways, time to start doing that ruling that we do so well, and with that, we have our advisors to keep the KIng's flights of fancy in check and do all the real world.



"They love me. They really, REALLY love me!"

This lot is pretty average, the lone exception being my spymaster. Good for me...outside of the fact that he's cynical, ambitious, and paranoid. I wonder if I can wear armour all the time...I have a mayor with 16 for learning, but for some reason he didnt' show up on the list when I was looking for appointments. Maybe he didn't want to displease a man of God?

So what am I going to do with this motley crew? Well here's the initial rundown.

Going to send my Chanchellor off to Turamenstakian...the light purple thing to the northwest of my demense. I figure Bagrat's already fifty; keep the claims to territory simple, small, and against the few places that we outnumber the defenders.

My Marshall is going to be doing research. Normally I'd try train troops, but 99% of the time some dirt farmer drops a trebuchet on the guys head ro something equally sucktastic, and his replacements are even worse then he is. Plus being a hothead he'd probably do something stupid that would be inconvinient to me, but not enough to let me take his titles.

The Stewart and Chaplin are doing what they will probably be doing for the next few decades; researching.

My spymaster, I dont' want anywhere near me, I mean the capital. So I've sent him off to keep an eye on any possible plots my second cousin might hatch up, so that I can revoke his titles and consolidate my power keep him on the straight and narrow like a caring liege that I am.
 

canadiancreed

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1066, a year in review

Not too much to report, since it's only been three months, but starting out, there's been a few important changes.

I raised the imperial authority from "wait we report to someone?" levels to "we'll answer his letters when we have nothing else better to do" levels. The manlove that my vassals had for me has dropped to getting semi-enthusiastic fistpumps, but the extra levies from all three levels of government will slack my disappointment.

Remember when I was checking out my neighbours, and how Kahketi was practically Georgia with a differnt paintjob? Well turns out their count is a brother with a different mother as well (well if you go back eight generations, across, then down six more.) Fun fact, his great-great grandfather missed out on being the King of Armenia, unlike his two other brothers. That's gotta suck. It might explain the slight loathing of our linage as well, but not enough to not join our realm right away. Apparently it gives you a massive change of opinion of someone as well (his original opinion of me was -6. It's now 68, and most of the negative is from increased imperial authority). He'll be a good vassal of mine until I can revoke his titles, being in my Duchy and all.

The Byzantines practically leapt out of the gate to attack the Seljuk Turks. Guess they didn't want to have the Battle of Manzikert happen in this reality I suppose. Naturally we accepted; we wont' be doing anything, and it keeps us for becoming a grease stain for the Cumans or Turks to have the Big Purple loving us so.

Decided to go after Dwim of the two Muslim realms that border me and are bite sized. One reason is because it's probably about as far south as we go barring the Seljuks dissinigrating froma succession crisis, and being in a different du jere Duchy then my Duke, he doesn't get to instaclaim it as his own when conquered. Decided to do something I normally don't and raise my vassals armies instead of hiring mercs. Not feeling too hot about the earning power of my realm (I dont' think there's one county that has more then three build slots. Yuck), and the last thing I need is a stack thrice the size of my entire army standing pissed at me because I can't pay them. Here's hoping the Muslim world is too distracted to care about us swatting a neighbourhood mosquito.
 

canadiancreed

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1067, a year in review

I guess the stress of research was too much for our court chaplin. In the four months he had the job, his mind practically dissolved until he died soon after new years at 26 (damn!) I blame cheap communial wine. He is replaced with my only son and heir to my kingdom, who I'm hoping will avoid the same fate by being thrown into the mentally fortifying task of leading armies into hand-to-hand combat, instead of the dangerous world of books and learning.

Three months after we declared war, our first battle against the enemy finally occurs on the rolling hills of Tao, now known as the massacre of Tao. Naturally my Duke and vassal were so pleased about the victory that they bitched about having to be there the entire time. Whoever said vassals were like spoiled children was so right.

Two months later, we finally arrive at the capital of Dwin, Lori. Man mountain provinces are a bitch to transverse. Their token defending force was eradicated (68 men? Serisouly? What was the point?), and the siege of Lori begins. On a side, what is it with Muslin province cities looking like Mos Eisley?
The troops from my furthest province, Abkhazia, arrive. This is the source for why Abkhazing is used to describe that someone is very slow, or conveniently late in the Caucasus.

Ah my sister. Trusting, content, humble, diligent, potential kinslayer? My spymaster informed me that she, for some reason, wanted to off her own nephew, and the heir to my throne. Considering that she'd be quite busy before it got to her turn on the throne (there's myself, another sister, and her three sons before her), she's 41, without child, and ill, I suppose whatever she's afflicted with has messed up her mind. She must have been trying to learn like my former Chaplin. I decide to lock her away for her own safety, and those around her. And with nothing to read; that's when trouble starts.

Man sieges are slow. Where's some gunpowder when you need it?

Man, I remember when no-one had ever heard of heathen bashing. The Duke of Alania, like a poser, decided that if the Byzatium Empire and the Kingdom of Georgia can do it, he should too by declaring war on the Emirate of Derbert. Or for those following at home, the pinkish speck on the shores of the Caspain Sea. Unlike a poser, he's already got one province conquered and is moving on to the second of that realm. A bit concerning. And he isn't too fond of me because I....dishonoured an alliance? Dont' recall ever being asked. Maybe the invitation is still in the mail?
 

canadiancreed

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1068-9, two years in review

Squished two years back to back because not much happened in 1069. I expect this will happen quite a bit with the need for tiny armies to recharge into something that won't get crushed.

New Years Eve proves to be deadly once again as the King's mother passes on. The King's wife, meanwhile, looks to be much more relaxed.

Somehow the Emir of Dwin has gotten troops to magincally appear in our nations capital. Fortuantely, there number less then a hundred, and are quickly fended off after the King offers free grog for each heathen head turned in at Bagrat's Grog Emporium.

After twenty months, the Siege of Lori is completed with the King fending off the last suicidal warrior to charge into our lances. Unfortuantely, the Emir is....a bit studbborn, Four months and the town of Swim leveled, he's no longer so stubborn.



The realm, in the year of our Lord 1069.

Unfortuantely the war was not without cost. the heir to the Georgian throne was maimed in battle. Dont' know how much of an effect health has on fertility, but as he is the only child, and his wife is already a bit frigid (mastermind thelogian -5 to fertility) it's definitely not good news.

With the fighting done, I send my court chaplin into his most dangerous arena of battle yet; researching some culture for us. Godspeed my heir.

My awesome spymaster kicks the bucket at 38. Being as how he has been stuck in Tao for two years and quite depressed, I can only assume the County of Tao is the most boring place in my realm. Starting to wonder if I really want it now... His replacement, the only person with a double digit intreguige score, takes over spying on the Duke of Tao

All of my neighbours seem to still be fighting along nice as you please. The Bysantines had two of the Turks northern provinces under siege, but they're advancing with a 6k stack of men. I'm hoping they're not heading here, because I dont' have the manpower to stop them. Alania is having issues with the Derbert Emir; he has one of his provinces, but the Emir has sacked Alania. Me thinks if I can get my troops back up and the Turks are crushed, I might see if I can get in on Alania's action and snap up a nice Caspian coastline. I hear the beaches are quite nice.

The Bysantine-Turk War has taken a turn for the worse. While the Turks dont' seem to be intrested in me, they are sieging every province along my border, and with no response from the Bysentines in sight. Alania has recovered their capital, and is back on the offensive. Not good news for our effort thats' for sure.
 
Last edited:

generalolaf

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  • Crusader Kings II: Charlemagne
  • Crusader Kings II: The Republic
  • Cities in Motion
  • Crusader Kings II: Sons of Abraham
  • Crusader Kings II: Sword of Islam
  • For the Motherland
  • Europa Universalis III
  • Europa Universalis III: Chronicles
  • Divine Wind
  • Europa Universalis IV: Art of War
  • Europa Universalis IV: Conquest of Paradise
  • Europa Universalis IV: Mandate of Heaven
  • Cities: Skylines - Mass Transit
  • Europa Universalis IV: Rights of Man
  • Stellaris Sign-up
  • Stellaris: Galaxy Edition
  • Stellaris
  • Prison Architect
  • Crusader Kings II: Conclave
  • Crusader Kings II: Horse Lords
  • Europa Universalis IV: Common Sense
  • Crusader Kings II: Way of Life
  • Europa Universalis IV: El Dorado
  • 500k Club
  • War of the Roses
  • Warlock 2: The Exiled
  • Victoria 2
  • Cities: Skylines
  • Europa Universalis IV: Cradle of Civilization
I love masochistic AARs :D

Good luck. As usual for a country like Georgia, you'll need it :p