Originally posted by BRYCON316
All the Germans must be asleep, because there hasn't been any Francophobic sentiment set. I guess we'll ahve to wait until morning.
German Francophobe reporting on duty, Sir! Why, those no-good snail-eatin', absinth-drinkin' fould-mouthed Frenchies who have been stealin' land from us for the last 500 years...
Enough fun for now. I think quite a lot of the blame for WWI is to be assigned to the gerenal staffs of the various countries, who all believed, and told their governments, that any coming war would be short, bloodless, and easily won. Think about it, if you're a political big-wig, and your alleged experts in the field of military matters tell you:
'Just sign that DOW, boss, and in 3 months, you won't find their country on any politicial map ever again, we'll steamroller all the way back to [insert-capital-here] and back in a breeze.',
what would you do?
Good old Conrad v. H. surely had strange ideas about a war being good for A.-H. The truly tragic thing is that the blank-cheque given to the Austrians for handling the Serbian matter was based on the uninformed, but not-too-unreasonable assumption of German Reichskanzler Theobald v. Bethmann-Hollweg that his OHL had a plan of some kind for a war in the east. Turned out they only had the Schlieffen-Plan...
Basically, Theo thought along the following lines in the year since the 2nd Moroccon Crisis:
'There probably will be a war in Europe soon, and it'll get real tough for Germany. Under some certain circumstance, though, we just might be able to emerge unscathed, or even victorious:
1) The Social Democrats have to support us.
2) A.-H. needs to support us fully.
3) The Brits must stay neutral, at least for a time.'
Given these thoughts, the situation of 1914 was rather ideal: A.-H. would definitely be involved fully, after all, it was their war in the first place. As Serbia was an ally of Russia, an involvement of Russia was likely, and as Russia was the most oppressive and backward regime in Europe at that time, it was rather likely the SPD would support going to war against them (that the SPD turned out to be even more patriotic was a surprise to almost everyone when war was declared, so Theo probably needn't have worried at all

). And, for the last point, if Russia's ambition to gain access to the Mediterranean and Constantinople were pushed down a notch or two by a war against Germany and A.-H., well, that wouldn't really run contrary to British interests at all.
Those thoughts led to Theo sending that infamous blank cheque. Now had he consulted with his OHL and Moltke there, they'd have told him that the German High Command had no plan for a war focussed on the Eastern Front at all. Their one and only plan for any war whatsoever was the Schlieffen-Plan, an all-out attack against France while violating the neutralities of countries who had British guarantees protecting them. It's easy to see why such a plan didn't really match with point three of Theo's list.
So, in short, what Theo wanted, planned for, and based his policy on, was a war against Russia, while stricly defending against France who'd be supporting her ally. What he got was an all-out German attack on France, complete with the seizing of Antwerpes, a city once called 'a pistol aimed at England's heart'...
As to why the heck the German government and the German high command never just sat and talked, while all the world thought of Germany being the pinnacle of militarism...don't ask me, I simply think it's a model case of criminal negligence.
About the naval arms' race between Germany and Great Britain: Unluckily, our emperor Wilhem II. wasn't exactly an anglophile. His mother was a member of Biritsh Royalty, a daughter (or granddaughter?) of Queen Victoria, IIRC, and her and him just didn't get along at all, partially, it is rumoured, because she could never accept the fact that Wilhelm had been crippled during birth, and because she made some remarks that clearly showed the disdain she felt for him. So, it s said, Wilhelm developed an animosity against his mother and their relatives early on, and sometimes interferred with his Empire's foreign policy later on just to spite the Brits.
As was the case when he sent an encouraging 'Well done, and keep going!' telegram to Ohm Krueger during the Boers war, after a particularly nasty defeat the Brits suffered at the Boers' hands.
No, I'm not going to blame all the German-British problems to the personal problems of Willi and his Mom, but they certainly influenced his decisions, when it came to implementing Tirpitz' program. Besides, Wilhelm was a sucker for anything marine-wise, be it sailing yaughts or battle cruisers (British heritage, maybe?

), he really liked the idea of having a big fleet, and probably didn't think too much about the possible uses such a fleet might have in the eyes of other ship-owners.
That the British and the Germans didn't manage to find a solution to this (especially for Germany) minor problem of a maritime arms' race, despite numerous attempts at talking over these things, as well as British-German conferences about colonial expansion of Germany, is a particularly tragic chapter of pre-WWI history. It wouldn't have taken much, only the Germans accepting a maybe 5:3 ratio with the British ships (like the Japanese accepted with the brits and the US after WWI, until they decided to get tough), and the British accepting that the fleet wasn't meant to stay in the North Sea, but meant to sail the waters of the Marianas, scare Chinese and Hottentots, and parade in front of the Kaiser at the Kieler Woche.
Wait, you say, I mentioned 'German colonial expansion'? Wouldn't that mean war, and/or a threat to Great Britain?
Nope. The colonial expansion plans that were discussed in earnest in Germany before WWI (they were also discussed in what was described as a 'friendly, almost chummy' atmosphere with 2 British delegations) were these: Acquire the Portuguese colonies of Mozambique and Angola once Portugal went bankrupt, and would have to sell some of her possessions to pay off foreign debt, and maybe buy the Congo from the Belgian King, thus forming a central/south-African colonial 'empire' including Kamerun, (Belgish-) Kongo (little chance to get more of the French Congo after 1912

), Angola, Deutsch-Ostafrika (Tansania), Mozambique, and Deutsch-Südwest (Namibia). Such an increase in overseas possession and therefore overseas trade would surely have warranted a reasonable fleet-buildup, and if done while all the while consulting with the Brits, it would probably have gone off rather smoothly.
Missed opportunities, foolish people at the helm, and a complete misjudgement of the state of military science and hardware. Those, in my eyes, are the things that are to blame for WWI.
[French-bashing]
(This is for you, Brycon

)
Naww, who am I kiddin'? It's all the fault of them damn frogs, seducing stalwart Brits to take up arms against their German brothers, paying the Serbs to give Conrad von H. (a French sleeper-agent) a CB against them, then insidiously sending a false cable to the German embassy in Russia, telling the good ambassador to DOW the Czar!
Did you know that the v. Tirpitz family couldn't come up with proof that their Great-great-Grandmother actually came from Karlsruhe, as was claimed? Thorough investigation by the NFL of Germany (Nationalist French-Loathers) revealed that the time of her birth coincided with a French Army passing nearby during the 30 years' war! So it is likely that she was French, after all, and that her subersions came to fruit in her great-great-grandson Admiral v. Tirpitz, who used his plan for naval build-up to further alienate the British and the Germans, only to further the goals of the dastardly French!
It all began when the 'Huguenots' were 'expelled' from France. According to recent statements made by the WWF (Worldwide Weirdo Federation), based upon secret documents smuggled out of Paris by some heroic nutcases, these Huguenots actually all were agents of the French Crown, sent out to infiltrate, corrupt and subvert the other governments of Europe. Do you think it was an accident that Prussia fell so easily when Napoleon came? It was the result of the Huguenot 'refugees' (those that Friedrich the Great foolishly allowed to settle in Brandenburg) having successfully undermined the King's will to fight, not to mention their having taken over a significant part of Prussia's miliary industry, leading in turn to the Prussian army being out-gunned by the French army.
It's all obvious now, isn't it? For centuries, the French have done everything they could to gain dominance in Europe, and just make existing a real pain in the b*** for all other countries in the world. Modern examples of this scheme are nouvelle cuisine, haute couture, and all TV appearances by Richard Kléidermann. We MUST unite, and fight against this menace, or we will all end up eating FRENCH fries and filet mignon, drinking Perrier or Merlôt, and speaking Frog. They _ARE_ out there! Lurking around! BEWARE!!!
[/French-bashing]
Now I just have to pray that the French who read this are _not_ part of that conspiracy, else I'm toast

