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I've just discovered this thread. Absolutely hilarious! Well played, sir. I will read your other AARs as well now.
NapoleonComple - I must be honest, is there actually a 'right job' for an anti-fascist poet in a fascist puppet dictatorship? Because I'm not sure I can think of one.
H.Appleby - That good hey? I thought Slovakia would be far lower on the Deadometer
Stuyvesant - OTL Slovakia somehow managed to stumble on till March/April 1945 so if T&T can match that they've got months of this sort of thing to look forward to.
Slovakia as an art piece does make more sense than it as a country.
Surt - I believe that was the reason that Tuka got replaced in OTL, his replacement was the properly named Štefan Tiso, who coincidentally was also President Tiso's cousin.
Nathan Madien - Frank Drebin at least got some things right (OK by accident), not something I think most Slovak ministries can claim.
Accius - Glad you like it, hope the rest also meet with your approval
H.Appleby - That good hey? I thought Slovakia would be far lower on the Deadometer
Stuyvesant - OTL Slovakia somehow managed to stumble on till March/April 1945 so if T&T can match that they've got months of this sort of thing to look forward to.
Slovakia as an art piece does make more sense than it as a country.
Surt - I believe that was the reason that Tuka got replaced in OTL, his replacement was the properly named Štefan Tiso, who coincidentally was also President Tiso's cousin.
Nathan Madien - Frank Drebin at least got some things right (OK by accident), not something I think most Slovak ministries can claim.
Accius - Glad you like it, hope the rest also meet with your approval
Although Paradox is usually to be commended for the accuracy of their historical research, some cracks in their perfection usually become apparent where the smaller countries are concerned. I'm not sure if it's because of a lack of potential leaders to fill those positions in said small countries, or a lack of historical archives that would help identify who held those positions in said small countries, or logistical and other difficulties that make it difficult for PI to access said archives, or simply a lack of interest in accuracy where small countries are concerned. Maybe all of the above. Same goes for PI somehow forgetting to give Slovakia an air force.
But, making it so that Slovakia apparently has almost nothing researched by 1944, now that's just silly. I imagine it to be an oversight on the part of the PI employee who was supposed to fill out Slovakia's tech tree. :rofl:
To be fair to Paradox, when looking at all the nations one might play in the WW2 timeframe laid out before you on the country select screen Slovakia has to come near the end of a very long list.
Apparently Paradox also thinks poet Allen Tate is qualified to be an United States Foreign Minister. Then there's the puzzling case of Head of State Warren G. Hooper.
Warren G. Hooper, the Michigan State Senator who was murdered by person or persons unknown in 1945? Okay, that tears it, Paradox is definitely just messing with us. They do incredibly good research into people of no significance just to force us to learn about them. It's an insidious plot to give these people immortality.
Nathan Madien - What can I say, I've developed a soft spot for the fictional T&T. And Pruzinsky of course.
Black Watch - This is not lack of information or lack of options, it's just lack of interest and/or effort. I mean I'm no Slovak master scholar, I just chucked the names into google, hit translate and observed what came out. For those interested the Czech, German and Slovak wikipedias are not short of information on actual ministers of the time and are mostly readable in English after being google translated.
On the tech point, you must remember the 1944 scenario is just a badly researched and/or unfinished mess. As I think I mentioned at the start of this AAR the D-Day invasion force starts out of supply and with no port, this almost inevitably ends up with the entire force being destroyed. There are also large gaps elsewhere where even large countries got skipped over, for instance Canada starts with WW1 doctrines and the same officer numbers as 1936 (so an actual ratio of <15%) and as you would expect this makes the army spectacularly ineffective. They are not the only Allied army to suffer this fate.
NapoleonComple - As far as I know this is the only Slovak 1944 AAR. It may well have been the first time anyone anywhere actually chose that combination, so I agree you can't really blame anyone for not testing it.
Nathan Madien/H.Appleby - Hooper and Tate are traditional Paradox mysteries, they've been inexplicably included and complained about since HoI2 but remain in place to confuse and confound new players and remind old players of the past.
And now, back to Bratislava
Black Watch - This is not lack of information or lack of options, it's just lack of interest and/or effort. I mean I'm no Slovak master scholar, I just chucked the names into google, hit translate and observed what came out. For those interested the Czech, German and Slovak wikipedias are not short of information on actual ministers of the time and are mostly readable in English after being google translated.
On the tech point, you must remember the 1944 scenario is just a badly researched and/or unfinished mess. As I think I mentioned at the start of this AAR the D-Day invasion force starts out of supply and with no port, this almost inevitably ends up with the entire force being destroyed. There are also large gaps elsewhere where even large countries got skipped over, for instance Canada starts with WW1 doctrines and the same officer numbers as 1936 (so an actual ratio of <15%) and as you would expect this makes the army spectacularly ineffective. They are not the only Allied army to suffer this fate.
NapoleonComple - As far as I know this is the only Slovak 1944 AAR. It may well have been the first time anyone anywhere actually chose that combination, so I agree you can't really blame anyone for not testing it.
Nathan Madien/H.Appleby - Hooper and Tate are traditional Paradox mysteries, they've been inexplicably included and complained about since HoI2 but remain in place to confuse and confound new players and remind old players of the past.
And now, back to Bratislava
26th June 1944
26th June
Having taken an early break to recover from the news that their head of security is in fact an anti-fascist poet, Tiso and Tuka return bright and early the next day to the issue of intelligence and security.
"First of all we need to sort out a replacement Head of Intelligence." Tiso started.
Tiso paused, fought down his terror without reaching for his hip flask, and continued.
"If you could please show us the options General." Tiso managed, receiving a nod of encouragement from Tuka.
As Tiso and Tuka awaited in dread Malar handed over the file. To their complete lack of surprise it was as awful as they had feared; the only candidate was indeed terrible.
"As you can see the only actual applicant for the job was Jaroslav Kratochvil, and he's patently unsuitable." Malar apologised.
"Unsuitable?" Tuka angrily questioned. "That's putting it mildly!"
"Indeed. What possible use is a former Minister for Industry and Trade from the Protectorate of Bohemia and Moravia as the Head of Slovak Intelligence?" Tiso asked.
"And he's Czech!" Tuka exclaimed, prompting all three men to spit on the floor in disgust.
"I'm afraid it's worse than that." Malar sheepishly explained. "It's not actually that Jaroslav Kratochvil who applied. It's the other one."
"Not?!" Tuka shouted.
"I'm afraid so." Malar said.
"Jaroslav Kratochvil the poet, fanatical Communist, Bolshevik apologist, anti-fascist resistance member and man wanted by the Gestapo!?" Tiso exclaimed.
"And he's Czech!!" Tuka yelled. Again. Louder. Prompting another round of disgusted floor spitting.
--
Bonus Fact - There were indeed two Jaroslav Kratochvil alive in the 1940s and famous enough to be on the internet. I think Paradox probably meant to pick the former Minister for Industry and Trade from Bohemia (who aside from being Czech was sacked and disappeared sometime in 1942, having never worked in anything even slightly intelligence related), it certainly would explain why he was an industrial specialist. However looking at the in-game portrait it is quite clear they picked a photo of the communist poet.
Having taken an early break to recover from the news that their head of security is in fact an anti-fascist poet, Tiso and Tuka return bright and early the next day to the issue of intelligence and security.
"First of all we need to sort out a replacement Head of Intelligence." Tiso started.
Tiso paused, fought down his terror without reaching for his hip flask, and continued.
"If you could please show us the options General." Tiso managed, receiving a nod of encouragement from Tuka.
As Tiso and Tuka awaited in dread Malar handed over the file. To their complete lack of surprise it was as awful as they had feared; the only candidate was indeed terrible.
"As you can see the only actual applicant for the job was Jaroslav Kratochvil, and he's patently unsuitable." Malar apologised.
"Unsuitable?" Tuka angrily questioned. "That's putting it mildly!"
"Indeed. What possible use is a former Minister for Industry and Trade from the Protectorate of Bohemia and Moravia as the Head of Slovak Intelligence?" Tiso asked.
"And he's Czech!" Tuka exclaimed, prompting all three men to spit on the floor in disgust.
"I'm afraid it's worse than that." Malar sheepishly explained. "It's not actually that Jaroslav Kratochvil who applied. It's the other one."
"Not?!" Tuka shouted.
"I'm afraid so." Malar said.
"Jaroslav Kratochvil the poet, fanatical Communist, Bolshevik apologist, anti-fascist resistance member and man wanted by the Gestapo!?" Tiso exclaimed.
"And he's Czech!!" Tuka yelled. Again. Louder. Prompting another round of disgusted floor spitting.
--
Bonus Fact - There were indeed two Jaroslav Kratochvil alive in the 1940s and famous enough to be on the internet. I think Paradox probably meant to pick the former Minister for Industry and Trade from Bohemia (who aside from being Czech was sacked and disappeared sometime in 1942, having never worked in anything even slightly intelligence related), it certainly would explain why he was an industrial specialist. However looking at the in-game portrait it is quite clear they picked a photo of the communist poet.
well, if anything you made it painfully clear how they did their research on this country and start date. A Czech, communist, antifascist poet wanted by your master country's intelligence service. The perfect man for the job I'd say.
Now I do wonder, who would get to that guy first, the Germans for being a communist anfifascist poet, or the Soviets for him being the minister of a fascist country they are at war with...
Now I do wonder, who would get to that guy first, the Germans for being a communist anfifascist poet, or the Soviets for him being the minister of a fascist country they are at war with...
6 ingame days in two months. By this speed, we'll see Windows 1284 before this is finished 
I say keep Hans in post; at least he's not Czech(I would, as a Slovak, spit on the floor in disgust for good measure, but there's a carpet :S) and red. Also, there might be something he didn't show yet, that being intelligence and, although probably limited, capability of independent thinking...
This would require some kind of tunneling apparatus - say, shovels. I'm not sure Slovakia is technologically advanced enough for such soaring heights of engineering prowess.
But I will admit that the options for Slovakia are getting extremely limited, what with the personnel problems (and the minor issue of several Soviet Fronts ready to overrun the country), so the tunnel-to-Switzerland has the appeal of being an actual, positive, plan. More than Slovakia has managed so far.
Everytime El Pip mentions a flaw in Paradox's research of Slovakia, I think that country gets closer to banning Paradox altogether.
Which wouldn't last for long. Remember that Slovakia is a member of the EU and even has the Euro today, so some guys in Brussels and/or Strasbourg wouldn't be really pleased about that. Also Slovakia is a pretty democratic and realistic country nowadays, so they'll probably look at the game, and see two things:
(1) Slovakia is totally wrong researched and is near if not already into historical revisionism
(2) Slovakia is just a bit more unimportant on the world stage as it is nowadays (just notice, that even a significant amount of Germans - just a few hundred miles away - cannot tell you they're member of the EU or even the Euro), so (1) probably doesn't matter much, since it's quite unrealistic (regarding the game's setting and goal) to get (1) right - not just for Slovakia, but for every other country in the world.
--
Bonus Fact:
The Slovaks take their legacy pretty light (I'm not saying they try to ignore it, just that they could discuss about how much responsibility people, that weren't even planned during the fascist days, have for the crimes back then - a way of thinking that's not possible in Germany itself).
No, that's optimism. Defeatism at this point would involve the many cyanide capsules floating around Axis HQ.