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Yes, my next attempt at an AAR. Hopefully, I'll be able to finish this one...

Anyway, the stats:

Country: Bavaria
Scenario: 1836, VIP latest version


Sounds pretty simple, doesn't it? HAHA! That's were you're wrong! In order to provide you, the reader, with your daily recommended supply of AAR goodness, you should go read Rensslaer's AAR.

But, if you want to see a mediocre Vicky player set impossibly high goals and likely crash in a spectacular spout of flame, then you've come to the right place.

My Goals/Restrictions:

1. Be #1.
2. Enter into no alliances, save for the starting defensive ones with the German states, or with satellites.
3. Satellite at least 4 of the Major Powers. (Austria, Prussia, Russia, France, Britian, USA)
4. Tech trades are limited to 1-for-1, once every 10 years.
5. I will buy no more than 2 provinces every 10 years.
6. No colonial wars.
7. I will defeat all 6 of the Major Powers in war.

The only mod I'm using is an event I wrote to declare myself Germany if I hold Berlin, Frankfurt, Munich, Cologne, and Hanover.

The first chapter (1836-1846) will be posted tomorrow!
 

Rensslaer

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Ooh! I am intrigued, Sir!

And you give me too much credit! I, too, am a mediocre Vicky player. ;) Thank you, though!

I will look forward to a tale of the slightly crazy, and slightly more schlossched King Ludwig.

Rensslaer
 

Freddan

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Rocketman said:
Yes, my next attempt at an AAR. Hopefully, I'll be able to finish this one...

Anyway, the stats:

Country: Bavaria
Scenario: 1836, VIP latest version


Sounds pretty simple, doesn't it? HAHA! That's were you're wrong! In order to provide you, the reader, with your daily recommended supply of AAR goodness, you should go read Rensslaer's AAR.

But, if you want to see a mediocre Vicky player set impossibly high goals and likely crash in a spectacular spout of flame, then you've come to the right place.

My Goals/Restrictions:

1. Be #1.
2. Enter into no alliances, save for the starting defensive ones with the German states, or with satellites.
3. Satellite at least 4 of the Major Powers. (Austria, Prussia, Russia, France, Britian, USA)
4. Tech trades are limited to 1-for-1, once every 10 years.
5. I will buy no more than 2 provinces every 10 years.
6. No colonial wars.
7. I will defeat all 6 of the Major Powers in war.

The only mod I'm using is an event I wrote to declare myself Germany if I hold Berlin, Frankfurt, Munich, Cologne, and Hanover.

The first chapter (1836-1846) will be posted tomorrow!


Intresting...

Is there a possibility that you could post that event?
 

coz1

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Those are some mighty high goal posts you've constructed, but Bavaria is fun win or lose. I'll be watching this one.
 

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defeat all 6 major power at wars....thats a pretty big goal......wish you luck and hope you dont die in the first war
 

SirCliveWolfe

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Rocketman said:
But, if you want to see a mediocre Vicky player set impossibly high goals and likely crash in a spectacular spout of flame, then you've come to the right place.

Ah... nothing we like more sir!! ;)

Seriously though, good luck and have fun... looking forward to your first update.
 
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January 1, 1836

King Ludwig: I want it all!
Prussianalliances.png


SecArmy: What's with the king?

SecForeign: He's a little crazy.

King: Show a little respect! *draws sword*

Aide: Sir, a crayon drawing of a sword won't hurt anybody.

King: *looks, paper flops* Just when I needed you most...

SecInt: *cough* Anyway, I've balanced the budget. We're now making about 3 gold a day.

King: If money talks, it ain't on speaking terms with me.

Scientist: Indeed, sir. But, we've started researching Mechanical Production by taking apart some Austrian vehicles.

----------
Vienna

*The Emperor heads outside to find his carriage, and his horse, up on blocks.

Emperor: What the hell?!
----------
----------
And so it begins...
----------

Feb 19 - The London Treaty. England and France sign, Prussia and Austria don't.

Brit PM: For the last time, Ludwig! It's only for Great Powers to sign! Now get out!

King: Do you really want to hurt me?

*Ludwig gets punted out of England*

Jun 5 - Bavaria begins working with the Iron Horse

Scientist: Can't say I like it. It has a tendency to leave piles of Iron Dung.

So Bavaria switched over to the railroad.

Sept - Oct - British India goes crazy and DoWs Sindh, Kalat, and Afghanistan. Bavaria laughs.

Oct 11 - Naval Hero Thesis discovered. Now our fishermen on the Bodensee are the happiest in the world.

1837

Jan 25 - Hannover joins the German alliance.

Jan 29 - USCA starts to dissolve. These two events are likely unrelated.

Feb 2 - Hannover dismisses some Professors for them claiming the Earth is 5 billion years old. How silly.

Feb 12 - China and Britian are about to fight over opium.

Feb 20 - Mexico needs its cake and pays France super-high prices for it.

Jun 8 - Mechanical Production finished. Unfortunately, I forgot to change the starting setting for trade, and Bavaria sells four of the five MPs.

Me: ARGH!

1838 (Game goes quickly as a small nation...)

Jun 4 - The OE and Egypt get into a scuffle.

Nov 11 - 'Positivism' is researched.

Scientist Slavedriver: Let's have a positive attitude check!

Scientists: We positively hate this ****ing place!

1839

Jan 2
- British India invades Yemen.

March 1 - Battle for the Streets. The Crisps got Northwest Blvd., the Bloods got King Ludwig Drive.

June 24 - We catch some smugglers, hang them and take their stuff. Frankfurt now hates us.

July 8 - British India attacks China. They must have a bee up their butt or something.

July 25 - Texas decides to rebuild its navy.

July 26 - Texas goes bankrupt.

1840

Aug 6
- Egypt gets stupid and DoWs OE, then insults the UK, bringing the whole British Empire against Egypt.

Dec 9 - Recruits rally to our flag. As well they should! It's a nice flag, isn't it?

1841

Absolutely nothing of interest happened.

1842

Feb 15 - Library is opened.

Bavarian: I am smart! I am smart! S-M-R-T...I mean, S-M-A-R-T!

Mar 12 - Law of the Free Womb passed in Paraguay. Was anybody played Paraguay? What on Earth does that mean?

Mar 23 - Organized Factorizes discovered.

Organizer: Ok, this says we should keep the machines inside the building.

Worker: Wow.

Apr - Saxony falls to revolters. I always feel bad for Saxony. They never seem to be able to keep it together. Wait a second... Revolutions dissolve all alliances...

May 16 - Bavaria DoWs Saxony

By September 4, the Bavarian army is in Dresden. A month later, Dresden falls and Saxony is annexed.

King: Der Wahnsinn, ist nur eine schmale Brücke. Die Ufer sind Vernunft und Trieb.

Aide: Well said, sir.

Nov 10 - The Walhalla completed. You should go see it. Seriously, I've been there. It's awesome. Go.

1843

July 12
- Strategic Mobility discovered.

SecArmy: You guys are a little late for the war, you know.

Scientist: Oh dang... Well, there's always the next war.

Aug 20 - Con Artist Bubble Bursts.

Aide: Snake-oil, you say...?

1844

June 2 - The Greek Constitution causes revolt risk to rise.

SecInt: How can they read it, anyway?

Dec 19 - 'Clean Coal' discovered.

This strange discovery prompts Russia to invade Bukkhara.

Bukkharan Soldier: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*gasp* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *gets bayoneted*

1845

Jun 11
- Railroad improvements finish.

July 16 - German liberals, upset over not being able to read the Greek Constitution or drink their spring water, revolt. Regensburg falls.

Nov 6 - Combat Medicine.

Scientist: It mows down enemy troops, then heals the survivors to mow them down again! HAHAHAHA!!

Dec 6 - Regensburg retaken.


Bavaria, January 1, 1846
Bav1.jpg

Green lines are 1st-level railroads. Red dots are provinces with high revoltrisk.
 

unmerged(17581)

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Rocketman said:
Dec 19 - 'Clean Coal' discovered.

This strange discovery prompts Russia to invade Bukkhara.

Bukkharan Soldier: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*gasp* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *gets bayoneted*

Poor guy. :/
 

coz1

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So pretty much every province is a high risk of revolting. How revolting. ;)

I like the subtle references to songs in this, especially Queen. :) I want to ride my bicycle...
 

stnylan

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Very amusing, please continue.
 

unmerged(17581)

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Indeed. It's been two days. For a new AAR, this is inexcusable. :mad:
 

rule_brittania

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Yeah - how will you achieve the impossible goals if you dont tell us about them.
(That only works if you dont think about it)
 
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Sorry guys, but the University of Florida kinda clotheslined my Vicky playing.

But, I've got in some playing and it's time for update 2!

1846-1856

or,

I Think the World's Gone Crazy


1846

Feb 1 - Coke discovered.

Researcher: Hey, dude, try this stuff... *snorts Coca-Cola*

Researcher 2: o_O

Feb 16 - Horrified at the new drug, Ingolstadt revolts. They're defeated two months later.

June 19 - Augsberg revolts/defeated

July 17 - We get our first General.

SecWar: Excellent!

Aug - Dresden revolts/defeated.

Liberals: Maybe THIS time it'll work!

1847

Feb 14
- Prussia attacks Denmark.

King's Sock Puppet: I can't wait until we can attack countries randomly...

Aide: Sir, why is there a sock puppet on your hand?

King: I don't know.

Mar - Chemnitz revolts, hoping to get its name changed. But all they get is my artillery! HAHAHA!

Jun 25 - Baden falls to revolters. As per our goal of defending the German people from liberalism, we prepare to invade.

SecForeign: No German should be forced to eat tofu and hug trees! For trees are spiny and tofu is Satan's food!

Sept 21 - 'Military Plans' discovered.

Researcher: See, if you make the soldiers march together instead of telling them to 'run thata way', you'll do much better.

General: Ohh...

Oct 1 - Bavaria DoWs Baden.

Liberalism had set in quickly. There was no resistence as the Bavarians pushed towards the captial.

Dec 9 - Baden's capital falls. We demand satellite status.

Badener: No problem. You can deliver your tribute here.

Baden Aide: Sir, they mean we become a satellite.

Bavarian: ...

1848

Jan 17
- We accept peace for Heidelburg. Baden is now small enough to be annexed next war, and we get few revolts in the meantime. Also, Bavaria is finally connected to Kaiserslauten.

Mar 7 - The King has been seen getting it on with Lola Montez. Not really surprising, since they did it right out in the Royal Carriage. Yeah, get that mental image in your head.

Mar 13 - Hungary breaks free of Austria. Austria calls in the Russians. But Hungary makes a snap decision and calls in Two Sicilies, Sardina, Croatia, Venice and Lombardia. Austria brings in the German alliance! Oh, the bloodshed! Wait, look, up in the sky! It's... it's the Pope! His Holiness dives in against Austria! Oh, the revolts are everywhere! Now Archduchess Sophie is leading revolts! Oh, the inhumanity!

Dec 21 - 'Army Professionalism' discovered.

1849

May 22
- We hold a diplomatic conference in Munich. 'Diplomatic Conference', of course, is Bavarian for 'ale and whores'.

Then everything goes crazy.

July 3 - Prussia declares itself Germany.

July 10 - Bavaria becomes the South German Federation, and an Austrian satellite.

Jul 12 - Saxe Weimar joins the SGF.

Jul 24 - Saxe-Meiningen joins, 'Germany' begins forming a North German Federation.

Jul 25 - 'Partial Unification of Germany' event fires, making the SGF a satellite of Austria....again...

Jul 26 - Saxe-Coburg-Gotha joins.

Jul 30 - Wuerttemburg.

Aug 11 - Baden joins. The Partial Unification is over.

Aug 28 - Croatia wins independence from Austria.

1850

Mar 23
- 'Muzzle Loaded Rifles' discovered.

SecArmy: No we're not being militaristic, why do you ask?

Mar 27 - The Liberal Revolution ends. They gave up after seeing the Revolution have the entirely opposite effect.

Liberal: *drinks spring water* It's times like this I wish I believed in alcohol...

Sept 13 - Field Training.

Drill Sarge: ALRIGHT, YOU MAGGOT! YOU GO OUT THERE AND TRAIN THOSE FIELDS!

Soldier: SIR, YES SIR! *goes outside and yells at the dirt*

1851

Feb 1
- Field Forts invented

April 29 -

King's Sock Puppet: Hey, if this is a Federation, why am I still an absolute monarch?

SecInt: Um...I dunno, sir.

King's Sock Puppet: Well, either change the name or institute some reforms! I won't be King of a country with a wrong name! What do you think this is, North Korea?

May 1 - SGF becomes a Constitutional Monarchy. Some people get angry. We don't care.

May 25 - Work Classification

Classifier: So, how would you classify your job?

Worker: Like being slowly drowned in elephant crap.

Classifier: *stuffs that report in an overstuffed file labeled 'elephant crap'*

Aug 8 - "Ad Hoc Money Bill Printing" discovered. Its definition wouldn't be discovered for another year.

Aug 10 - Austria finally beats the Italians.

Nov 11 - We're rich enough to afford full crime fighting. A few Justice League rejects are hired to patrol the SGF.

1852

Jan 28
- Our first election goes very well, and the Konservative Partei comes to power. This is like, the greatest party ever.

Jan 28 - We enact a bunch of reforms. Low minimum wage, low safety regulations, low unemployment money, acceptable health care. The SGF stands as a beacon of happy fun times. Also ale and whores.

Feb 1 - France declares war on us. Son. Of. A. Bitch.

ScreenSave18345235325.jpg

King's Sock Puppet: THEY...SHALL NOT...PASS!

Reserves are called up, Austria joins in. Austria only can spare one division as they're quickly swamped with revolts. The Franco-SGF war lasts 10 months.

6453575747.jpg

The final battle of the war.

Dec 9 - The SGF Army is defeated. When the French offer peace for Kaiserlauten, we gladly accept.

Dec 19 - Germany absorbs the NGF. Great. Just ****ing great.

1853

Apr 23
- We finish paying off our loan of 5000, bringing our economy back to full steam.

Dec 19 - The King nearly has a heart attack when a message arrives from Germany. Thank goodness, it was only a request for military access, which we grant.

King: (No Longer) Losing my Religion!

1854

We spent the whole year using all 10 of our DI points to improve relations with Germany. We got it up to +58.

1855

Nothing of interest, except the damn market! I'm the #5 Great Power, and I can't get any machine parts of explosives for anything!

Also, in preparation for the next war with France, a continous expansion of the mobilization pool begins. It's up to 15 divisions by 1856.

1856

Jan 1
- We finally get some explosives, and begin building level 1 forts on our border with France.

343465643673735.jpg

SGF, Jan. 1, 1856

Current Goals:

1. Kiss Germany's ass.
2. Prepare for future war with France.
3. Prepare for future war with Austria to end satellite status.
 

unmerged(17581)

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:rofl: Great update, good sir! Hopefully them Germans won't absorb your little Federation. You know those Germans! If you don't go to their festivals they'll come and get ya!
 

stnylan

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Hell, quite a bit did happen as you say. Those sound like good goals, for the short-medium term.