And then he commited suicide, in the hope that it would end the war with a white peace.
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If Real History Operated By CK2 Rules
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And then he commited suicide, in the hope that it would end the war with a white peace.
Mainly because unconditional surrender was demanded. Tends to take a lot of the incentive to be reasonable away.
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Afterward, Hitler posted in the Quick Answers thread, asking why Germany didn't get the White Peace he expected.
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Under ck2 rules, no, same monarch, same country. (The direct vassal view is hell though).
What???? Your majesty you're Empress of India, how dare you claim a king tier as your primary titile!!!!
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If real history were like CK2, we'd be talking about members of the Patrician Clinton and Bush dynasties competing to be the inevitable frontrunners for the Presidency of the Serene Republic of the United States, even tho nobody likes them in particular.
Wait a minute...
Wait a minute...
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The loser would be the one who didn't campaign, because only one patrician is allowed to campaign. If Patrician Clinton wins, I highly recommend her husband switch away from the Seduction focus.
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Israel would've holy warred the PA and then gone after Syria, since their levies are all but depleted from the non-stop civil war.
Aaban: Hey Rayyan, remember back when we were Syrian Muslims before we became English-speaking Christians and then Hebrew Jews?
Ryyan: Yeah, crazy times.
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22 July 1099
Godfrey of Bouillon crossed himself as he crossed the threshold into the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, his linen robes shifting silently about as he stepped into the holy place. Godfrey breathed a silent prayer of thanksgiving to be free of his mail. After three long years campaigning in the scorching Levantine heat, he hoped never to don the raiment of war again.
The sanctuary was filled with lords and knights, milling about and speaking softly to one another, although their conversations quieted as they became aware of Godfrey's presence. He was the last to arrive, and now they could begin the task for which they assembled: selecting who would rule this holy Kingdom of Jerusalem.
Godfrey nodded politely to Raymond of Toulouse as they each took their seat at the large council table brought in for the purpose. He knew that the selection would come down to one of the two of them. Raymond had been among the first to take the cross, but many and more of the assembled holy warriors had come to respect Godfrey's prowess on the battlefield.
Godfrey cleared his mouth to speak, only to be silenced as the doors flung open. Along with the other Crusaders, Godfrey turned to see an unfamiliar figure bedecked in royal finery. A herald standing alongside the newcomer then spoke, "All hail Heinrich Salian, Fourth of his Name, Holy Roman Emperor and King of Jerusalem!"
That prompted a murmur of incredulous talk around the table. "Who is this man to proclaim himself King who has only now arrived at the Holy Land?" bellowed Robert of Normandy.
"I'm the Emperor bro, and the Pope said I could have it," Heinrich replied evenly.
"But Your Majesty," Godfrey started cautiously, for as Duke of Lower Lorraine, he was a vassal of the Emperor, "the Holy Father recently lifted your excommunication..."
"Yeah, beats the shit out of me," Heinrich said, grabbing a chair and nudging Raymond to the side. Heinrich picked up the crown of Jerusalem and wrinkled his nose, clearly comparing it to his Imperial finery and finding it wanting, "but he said I did the most to beat back the Saracens, so I get to be King."
"Well, sire," Raymond interjected, the color rising in his face, "we do recall you sending an army that helped in those early battles on the cost of Acre, but you yourself remained in Germany. And besides, we Latins were responsible for capturing the holy city."
"Blow it out your ass, Ray," Heinrich said as a large group of pasty-skinned Germans, clearly suffering from acclimating to the heat for the first time, began filtering in. "If you guys don't mind, please direct these gentlemen to the castles, cities, and mosques you captured. They'll be taking over. I'm gonna hang out for a couple days to manage the transition before catching a ship back home. This place is really awful."
Godfrey was on the verge of challenging Heinrich to single combat, so great was his anger, when a breathless messenger ran into the room. "M'Lords, we are at war! The Fatimid Caliph has raised his armies to reconquer the Holy Land!"
"WHAT?!" Heinrich bellowed, "How is this possible? We only just defeated the Saracens!"
"Oh, well we defeated the Sunnis," Raymond replied, "See, the Fatimids are Shia."
Heinrich's face darkened. "Messenger, how large is this army?"
The messenger shrugged. "Hard to say, but I reckon at least thirty or fourty thousand."
"Welp," Godfrey said with a chuckle, standing and slapping Heinrich on the shoulder, "you have fun with that. I gotta get my levies disbanded. My barons are pissed."
"Wait!" Heinrich yelled as Godfrey and the other Crusaders stood and started for the door, "Come back! We must defend Christendom! ...Deus Vult?"
Godfrey of Bouillon crossed himself as he crossed the threshold into the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, his linen robes shifting silently about as he stepped into the holy place. Godfrey breathed a silent prayer of thanksgiving to be free of his mail. After three long years campaigning in the scorching Levantine heat, he hoped never to don the raiment of war again.
The sanctuary was filled with lords and knights, milling about and speaking softly to one another, although their conversations quieted as they became aware of Godfrey's presence. He was the last to arrive, and now they could begin the task for which they assembled: selecting who would rule this holy Kingdom of Jerusalem.
Godfrey nodded politely to Raymond of Toulouse as they each took their seat at the large council table brought in for the purpose. He knew that the selection would come down to one of the two of them. Raymond had been among the first to take the cross, but many and more of the assembled holy warriors had come to respect Godfrey's prowess on the battlefield.
Godfrey cleared his mouth to speak, only to be silenced as the doors flung open. Along with the other Crusaders, Godfrey turned to see an unfamiliar figure bedecked in royal finery. A herald standing alongside the newcomer then spoke, "All hail Heinrich Salian, Fourth of his Name, Holy Roman Emperor and King of Jerusalem!"
That prompted a murmur of incredulous talk around the table. "Who is this man to proclaim himself King who has only now arrived at the Holy Land?" bellowed Robert of Normandy.
"I'm the Emperor bro, and the Pope said I could have it," Heinrich replied evenly.
"But Your Majesty," Godfrey started cautiously, for as Duke of Lower Lorraine, he was a vassal of the Emperor, "the Holy Father recently lifted your excommunication..."
"Yeah, beats the shit out of me," Heinrich said, grabbing a chair and nudging Raymond to the side. Heinrich picked up the crown of Jerusalem and wrinkled his nose, clearly comparing it to his Imperial finery and finding it wanting, "but he said I did the most to beat back the Saracens, so I get to be King."
"Well, sire," Raymond interjected, the color rising in his face, "we do recall you sending an army that helped in those early battles on the cost of Acre, but you yourself remained in Germany. And besides, we Latins were responsible for capturing the holy city."
"Blow it out your ass, Ray," Heinrich said as a large group of pasty-skinned Germans, clearly suffering from acclimating to the heat for the first time, began filtering in. "If you guys don't mind, please direct these gentlemen to the castles, cities, and mosques you captured. They'll be taking over. I'm gonna hang out for a couple days to manage the transition before catching a ship back home. This place is really awful."
Godfrey was on the verge of challenging Heinrich to single combat, so great was his anger, when a breathless messenger ran into the room. "M'Lords, we are at war! The Fatimid Caliph has raised his armies to reconquer the Holy Land!"
"WHAT?!" Heinrich bellowed, "How is this possible? We only just defeated the Saracens!"
"Oh, well we defeated the Sunnis," Raymond replied, "See, the Fatimids are Shia."
Heinrich's face darkened. "Messenger, how large is this army?"
The messenger shrugged. "Hard to say, but I reckon at least thirty or fourty thousand."
"Welp," Godfrey said with a chuckle, standing and slapping Heinrich on the shoulder, "you have fun with that. I gotta get my levies disbanded. My barons are pissed."
"Wait!" Heinrich yelled as Godfrey and the other Crusaders stood and started for the door, "Come back! We must defend Christendom! ...Deus Vult?"
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Just think about all those peaceful "demand conversions" in the Balkans.
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2003:
General Franks: President Bush, our invasion of Iraq is almost complete. The Iraqi army is destroyed and Baghdad is occupied. We only need to mop up a few more outposts before… hold on, we’re getting some reports that Saddam Hussein has converted to Christianity.
George W. Bush: Darn it! Withdraw our forces at once!
General Franks: President Bush, our invasion of Iraq is almost complete. The Iraqi army is destroyed and Baghdad is occupied. We only need to mop up a few more outposts before… hold on, we’re getting some reports that Saddam Hussein has converted to Christianity.
George W. Bush: Darn it! Withdraw our forces at once!
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William of Normandy:
-"As you can see, your holiness, since Edward died childless and I am his distant cousin, I hereby state that I have a claim on the throne of England and thus requests your grant to invade"
The holy pope:
-"May wisdom ever elude you! Your request for an invasion has been granted."
-"As you can see, your holiness, since Edward died childless and I am his distant cousin, I hereby state that I have a claim on the throne of England and thus requests your grant to invade"
The holy pope:
-"May wisdom ever elude you! Your request for an invasion has been granted."
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Probably only funny to Americans (well, some of them):
November 2016
TV News: We are calling the election for the new President of the United States, Rick Santorum.
THEOCRACY GAME OVER
November 2016
TV News: We are calling the election for the new President of the United States, Rick Santorum.
THEOCRACY GAME OVER
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no see it used to be Brittainia but for whatever reason the rank itself localizes it to King/Queen
However with Ireland and their colonial holdings free they had to make the custom United Kingdom while they still had prestige to burn
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could easily be replaced with Ted Cruz, Rick Perry, or Romney and have the same end result
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Maybe I've been playing too much EU4 where it caps at +25 or -25%, but does it not stop at some value?
1948:
Aide: "Sultan Farrouk, a Jewish Revolt has broken out in Palestine! The Grand Mufti of Jerusalem is loosing much of his country to Jewish Rebels under the leadership of a David Ben-Gurion!"
Sultan Farrouk of Egypt: "We cannot allow that to happen! I wish to join them in their fight against the rebels!"
Aide: "Sorry sir, but you are not related to the Grand Mufti in any way. You cannot aide him in his fight against the Jews."
Sultan Farrouk: "Curses!... Well, I do have a claim on the Gaza Strip, so perhaps I can claim that and save some Palestinians from Jewish Rule..."
Aide: "Certainly sir, but doing so will take 5 points of your piety a month, and could anger the rest of the Islamic World."
Sultan Farrouk: "Eh, never mind then, I'll just wait for the Jews to liberate it. We'll take it then..."
You can also replace Farrouk with Abdullah of Jordan and the Gaza Strip with the West Bank and it'll still work.
Aide: "Sultan Farrouk, a Jewish Revolt has broken out in Palestine! The Grand Mufti of Jerusalem is loosing much of his country to Jewish Rebels under the leadership of a David Ben-Gurion!"
Sultan Farrouk of Egypt: "We cannot allow that to happen! I wish to join them in their fight against the rebels!"
Aide: "Sorry sir, but you are not related to the Grand Mufti in any way. You cannot aide him in his fight against the Jews."
Sultan Farrouk: "Curses!... Well, I do have a claim on the Gaza Strip, so perhaps I can claim that and save some Palestinians from Jewish Rule..."
Aide: "Certainly sir, but doing so will take 5 points of your piety a month, and could anger the rest of the Islamic World."
Sultan Farrouk: "Eh, never mind then, I'll just wait for the Jews to liberate it. We'll take it then..."
You can also replace Farrouk with Abdullah of Jordan and the Gaza Strip with the West Bank and it'll still work.
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