i would like to be able to give orders/targets to my vassals

[akinata]

being able to order them to attack a particular target.
else it is not worth sending them troops. especially when the player AI never attack vassals.

 

[Kitschy]

In one form or the other it should be possible with War Coordination that will comeback in the Golem Update.
Jordi's post about it link:

...

In this case, would you perhaps entertain a mechanic similar to Civ6 where, for Free City Vassals, we can pay to take control of all their units for a number of turns?

This could be a perk that only becomes available at maximum allegiance and would give another incentive to lure Free Cities away from your enemies.

As covered by the Roadmap, War Coordination will return in the Golem Update with a nice new coat of paint.