Here's the thing - if you manage absolutism right and get it all the way to 100, you're eventually going to have 70% admin efficiency, meaning, coring land and integrating vassals is going to take 30% of the expected cost without admin efficiency. This bonus, unlike most others, is multiplicative. Baseline, integrating a vassal requires 8 DIP per development point, so at 65% admin efficiency that's only 3 DIP per development point ... ish. Vassal integration speed has a baseline of 2 dip/month spent, increased by dip reputation (iirc each point of diplo rep increases the integration speed by the amount of diplo rep), and being same religion adds +1, and same culture group another +1. Not entirely sure, this is probably on the wiki.
Long story short - by the time you hit 1700 you'll have no trouble integrating a vassal that has 500 dev if you maxed absolutism and went with admin-influence for the extra 45% cost reduction (influence ideas + admin-influence policy). Main "problem" is keeping the vassal loyal - the baseline liberty desire is a quarter of the vassal's development. Better relations help reduce it, so does positive diplomatic reputation, so does having a royal marriage (which they will break the moment they get disloyal, so be careful). Main way I keep big vassals nice and happy is developing provinces and feeding them land - or burn prestige if you get too much of it and don't know what to do with it. Oh, and having trust above 50 helps as well - using your great power interaction to influence nation on your vassals that you intend to feed helps keep their liberty desire down. If memory serves, every 5 trust above 5 reduces liberty desire by 1% (conversely, going below 50 trust massively increases liberty desire).
Just a quick calculation for the 500 dev vassal when you're at 70% admin efficiency and have diplo, influence and admin filled and the policy active.
Total bonuses: +4 diplo rep, -45% integration cost, 0.3x integration cost (admin efficiency).
Total cost = 500*8*0.55*0.3 = 660 DIP
Total time = 660/(2+1+1+4) = 82.5 months (83 rounding up). A whopping 83 months. That's less than 7 years.
Someone please correct my math if I'm wrong here.